Last night, I was reading Deuteronomy 2 and verse 7 popped out at me. You see, yesterday morning and last night Satan was throwing a lot of guilt my way. I know that guilt comes from Satan and conviction from God, but I felt like maybe somewhere buried in the guilt may have been some conviction. I was praying and I did feel a conviction. When God convicts, it may hurt, yet it's also beautiful, healing, restoring, and captivating. He was working on my heart, whispering to me how special I was to Him, how much He loved me, desired me... He was asking to me to give Him my troubles, and He would help me overcome them. He told me to not worry and to completely abide and rest in Him, and that He would take care of everything.

And He gave me Deuteronomy 2:7. I changed a few of the words to redirect the focus from the Israelites to me:

The LORD my God has blessed me in all the work of my hands. He has watched over my journey through many rough times. These 18 years the LORD my God has been with me, and I have not lacked anything.

I have not lacked anything. Why? Because God is all I need. How foolish it is of me to think otherwise.

So, I was watching 60 Minutes with my Mamaw, and they were talking about how this random podunk town in TN is getting like $185,000 from the Homeland Security Department for them to use in their tatics against terrorists... in case they actually really want to come to the random podunk town they've never heard of. So it was great, because the host of 60 Minutes sat down with the mayor of Podunk Town (aka TiptonVille) and asked, "Really, do you think AlQueda is going to come to TiptonVille?"

The mayor opens his mouth, and out comes the most hick accent EVER!!! The mayor replies (and just imagine this being said by an old dude with a hick accent) "Well if I was AlQueda I would come to TiptonVille because nobody would expect it!"

Right... like AlQueda has actually head of TiptonVille before...

Anyhow, then on the way home, Dad and I listened to Laura Ingram on the radio, and she is way cool. She was talking about how "people from the left" say that Iraq isn't our concern, and that we should only be concerned with AlQueda. If Iraq wasn't important to AlQueda, however, then why would they bomb London, in hopes that the would withdraw troops from Iraq just as Spain did last year?

Hmmm.... I mean, really!

And then there was the caller who thought that the Bush administration failed to see to the terrorist threat in the US and that's 9-11 happened. And then Laura was like news flash! Terrorists blew up stuff during the Clinton administration and he did jack! Was Bush supposed to be able to clean up 8 years worth of damage in 9 months? I don't think so...

Satan did a pyschological number on me this morning. I hate Satan.

I think I may be ready for some change. Not a huge, drastic change, just a little change... well... if you can call college a little change... ha ha... but I'm ready to go.

It's weird though, because I'm still not comfortable in the AO Sunday school class, and I'm actually wary of AO itself. And it's not even like I want to stay in youth forever... I don't know what it is.

It doesn't usually take me this long to adjust to change. Maybe I just don't like the fact that I'm a freshman again. Maybe it just makes me feel small, young... maybe even insignificant. Maybe I feel like the older college kids are way wiser than me, that I won't be able to connect with them, that they won't like me...

But that's a bunch of crap from Satan! I mean really, I already have a few older college kid friends, and they aren't like that at all. I need to stop being so negative and stop believing Satan's lies.

By the way Brian, I planned out your college path for you. After you left my house last night, I randomly flipped through my college catalog and placed my finger to your future. Just so you know, you're supposed to major in marketing and minor in leadership studies... LOL... ok, probably not, but Amy, Graham, and Garrett and I all had fun with the idea anyways!

First off, thanks for all the positive feedback on my bear post! That was the result of a terribly boring day... you're right Justin... I do need a job or something else to do... ha ha... Anyhow, I figure if I never get a job in media production or writing, I could always photograph stuffed bears for calendars...

Anyhow, I am declaring a movie night at my place tonight! I know, when does this happen? So I haven't decided on the movie yet, so you can feel free to bring one if you wish. Sorry Michael, we're not going to watch Hitch again! We should probably watch something we've all seen and can make fun of... those are always the best movie nights! Anyhow, the time is 7:00, and there will be snacks and drinks but no real food so please eat at least a light dinner before you come. I don't live in the condo anymore, so if you don't know where my new apartment is at you can call me and I'll let you know. I live significantly closer to most of y'all now than I used to! Anyhow, leave a remark if you plan to come!

photo from SingAHappySong

Read a devotional.



photo from SingAHappySong

Got ready for the day.



photo from SingAHappySong

Ate some lunch.



photo from SingAHappySong

Did some chores.



photo from SingAHappySong

Got on the computer.



photo from SingAHappySong

Listened to my iPod.



photo from SingAHappySong

Read chapter five of Between A Rock and A Hard Place.

1. I wish I could solve everyone's problems.

2. I wish I could make a music video. Or a movie. Or both.

3. I wish I could go to London... after everything over there clears up.

photo from SingAHappySong

So tonight was Jenna's party and that was fun. We were going to eat outside but then we had to run inside because impending doom came upon us. It was quite fun. And I dropped my hamburger. :-( I also almost killed myself twice on Jenna's stairs. And Aimee, Anna, and Jenna and I almost broke Mr. Brewer's hammock. But it was still a fun night. :-)

Quote of the night: "Lay on top of me!" -Anna to Brian

I don't like Hilary Clinton. She was griping about how Bush didn't give enough money to fight terrorism... and that would have prevented London being bombed... how??? Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about, so someone can explain it to me if I'm wrong, but a guy on MSNBC said that more money would not solve London's security problem. And I'm not sure how the American budget affects London's security.

Other quote of the night: "I don't like her and I can't stand the sight of her." -guy on MSNBC about Hilary

Hope y'all enjoy my new pictures...

This is Garrett's new GQ look...



photo from SingAHappySong

So everyone (unless you live under a rock) knows that line from the movie Spider-man. But really... do we live it out?

I'm not exactly a fan of war, but I know sometimes it's necessary. After 9-11, most everyone was ready for us to give the terrorists a piece of our mind. How soon we forget. Now most everyone grumbles and complains about the war... "why are we there, nothing's getting accomplished""... "it's all about the oil"... "Bush is an idiot and doesn't know what he's doing"... they totally forget how it all started.

Now, before all my Democrat friends think I'm totally dissing on them and refuse to read the rest of the post, I'm not so please hear me out.

So a couple of days ago I mentioned Live 8, which was to raise awareness for G8, a conference of the world's eight richest nations to discuss helping the poorer countries. Live 8 especially emphasized the AIDS situation in Africa. England, among the eight countries, has been an ally to America in many ways. Tony Blair and George W. Bush allied together to fight against the Iraqis. England has several troops helping us in the war.

Then today, London is attacked by terrorists.

Why? Because THEY ARE A THREAT.

I hope and pray London will not wimp out like Spain did last year and remove their troops to appease the terrorists. I hope that London will band together, stir up some righteous anger, and be more determined than ever to fight. Now it's personal. Now their reason to fight should be greater and more personal than ever.

England and America are two of the richest nations in the world. We hold a lot of power in this world. "With great power..." We have the great power, so what is our responsibility? To fight for what's right. Whether that means providing money, food, and healthcare for Africans or warring with terrorists, we should be responding to the call of great responsibility.

*EDIT*
***PANIC FROM A REPUBLICAN*** Why are my adverts allowing people to read about Bush lies and Anti-Bush stuff?????

photo from SingAHappySong

The Toby Mac concert was a lot of fun. I went with Anna and Patrick and we met up with Amy B., Aimee, Rachel B., Robin, Jason, and Alex. We had a blast! Anna and I screamed and jumped around when Toby started singing "Jesus Freak"... we were so afraid he wouldn't sing it! The people in front of us looked at us like we were nuts! Ha ha! It started getting real fun when it started sprinkling! I enjoyed the rain but I was glad it didn't start pouring.

Church tonight and then we get to go eat Mexican... yum... I'm hungry just thinking about it...

Martha Stewart's nickname in the slammer was M. Diddy. I just happened to think that was quite hillarious.

Garrett has a way of surprising me. He bought an iPod online yesterday... a regular iPod on sale for $250... only $50 more than my mini... and it holds five times more songs than mine does...

Speaking of my iPod mini, I now have 245 songs. I've been pretty slow about uploading songs from my CDs... and I haven't bought any from the iTunes store yet. I think I might soon though. I would encourage everyone with an iPod to check out the songs from the Live 8 concerts and buy a few. Some of the proceeds go toward the cause for Africa, and that's awesome! There are a few I decided to buy soon. However...

I noticed that all of the songs are by mainstream artists. The only Christian artist I know of even involved with Live 8 was Jars of Clay (unless you count U2, but Bono confuses me so much I don't bother to label them or him anything).

Am I the only one who sees the problem with this? I mean... as Christians we should be setting the example. There are many non-Christian artists involved with this that are soooo far away from God. As you scroll through the songs, note that some are labeled "explict". They don't know God! Why should they love the Africans enough to care for them? NOT TO SAY THEY CAN'T... BUT they don't even know about God's love like we do. We should be the leaders in caring for others. Sometimes, however, we fail at that role, and that's quite unfortunate... and quite sad.

Homemade ice cream + lots of hot fudge + fireworks + annoying smoke balls + pyro boys + funny conversations = one great night!

Happy Independence Day everyone! Not only does Independence Day mean a celebration of our country, our freedom, hot dogs, and fireworks, but also the Twilight Zone, one of my favorite shows!

Well, I really have nothing else to say right now, but I hope everyone has a great day! I hope to see some of you tonight at the fireworks celebration!

*EDIT*
Shopping with mom + Twilight Zone marathon + lots of fireworks + cool July night + hanging out with Garrett, Anna, Aimee, Graham, and Michael + wondering if I will ever make it out of MTSU's parking lot + one overpriced but yummy brownie = another great day!

Yesterday... I did not beat Garrett and his cousin at the water balloon toss. :( Yes, they won for the fourth year in a row. *Shakes head in dismay* Well I still had fun. And when I got home, Mom had a present for me... The Phantom of the Opera soundtrack!!!!!! :) That made me very happy.

Today... that one song this morning at church was so cool... the one with the little boy singing... it was so... eerie in a way. More like mysterious.... I don't know, it was just cool. I liked it. Also, one thing that was said at Sunday school made me think... even though I may believe something is morally wrong, but it is allowed anyways, I don't have to like it or approve of it... and though I have a right to vote against it or advocate against it, I don't need to make the hugest deal out of it. I don't really feel like I've been doing that, but I don't want to make that mistake in the future. I can't always convince others of what I believe is right and wrong because they have a different mindset than I do. Most of all, I just need to pray for this country more often.

About cell phones:
Garrett: Zach didn't know to turn his cell phone off before the service.
Me: Zach doesn't have a cell phone.
Garrett: That's why he didn't know.
Me: Zach, one day when you finally have a cell phone when you're like... 45, then you'll need to turn it off before someone begins to preach.
Zach: I'll most likely be the one preaching.
Me: Well then you most definitely will want to turn off your cell phone!

Brother Dean: President Bush will not allow cell phones to go off at one of his meetings. I think the church should be more like that.
*A few minutes later, a cell phone rings*

photo from SingAHappySong

This is a non-humanoid alien creature from the original Star Trek series. It looks like a volcanic rock in this picture, but on the show it looked like a huge puppy covered in sausage, sauce, and cheese. Therefore, Garrett and I named it Pasta Puppy!

I watched Phantom of the Opera again. That movie blows me away... the music is incredible...

Today I get to go to Garrett's annual family cookout. This should be fun... I went last year as well. Garrett's dad and I almost beat Garrett and his cousin (who have a reigning dynasty) in the water balloon toss last year... watch out Garrett...

So this morning at VBS, God reminded me that obeying His way is always the best way. It may be scary at first, and I may not like the idea, but if I follow Him and obey Him, He will give me an awesome joy and peace. I've seen this so many times throughout my life.

So we were watching another one of those cheesy Lifeway VBS videos this morning and it was about a missionary in Hollywood. As I watched the video, some thoughts poured into my mind... the same thoughts I've had many times before: we need Christians in Hollywood making movies, producing movies, writing movies, acting in movies. Then I realized: what if God called me to do that? I've always said I would love to make a movie, write a screenplay, do video production, but I have always very adamently said that Corrupt California is one place I will not go.

I've always thought that I could do movies in Nashville, or write screenplays and send them off, or just do music videos instead. When I lived in Texas I thought about one day moving to the Nashville area. Is that not my destiny? Maybe... but it also may be for only a season of my life. I don't have to live in one place for the rest of my life. (This has already been evident in my life... I have lived in four different states!) I'm not saying that God has called me to Hollywood... I still don't know what's in store. But I do know that I have to be open to it. I need to humble myself to do whatever God calls me.

Then today during snack time, the kids were making an awful mess with their ice cream toppings. It was getting all over the entryway floor, sprinkles were getting crushed in the grout, one girl spilled a drink... it was a huge mess! So I quickly finished my ice cream and went to the bathroom and got some wet paper towels. I got on my hands and knees and did the best job I could to clean the floor. I just did what I felt like I was supposed to do. Sometimes small tasks, however, can be used to make a big difference. It's all about obedience.

One other thing I've learned... last night I was having a quiet time and I was wondering why some people tend to revisit the same sin over and over even though they know it's wrong. I saw a note I had written in my Bible that said "hypocrisy is the act of pretending, not imperfection." (Garrett has recently written a similar statement on his Phusebox.) And I realized that these people were not being hypocrites, but imperfect, as we all are. And God called me out, because I do the same thing. I'm imperfect too. We all are.

And we all have to humble ourselves before God and listen to His call... no matter what it is or where it is... even if it's Hollywood.

*EDIT* I liked it a lot better when all my Google ads were about toothbrushes... now they're all about BP and math... two thinks I despise...

Alright, I have two major issues with the world right now:

1. CAFTA. For those of you, like me, who make a point to dodge the news, you are probably not familar with this new act that the Federal Government is trying to pass. This alledged CAFTA will confine America to more rules but not even rules that we are to abide to as a nation, but as North Americans. See, this CAFTA thing involves Canada and Mexico as well. Um... hello... America's government is too different from the government of Canada and Mexico to mesh like this. Basically, if we sign CAFTA, we sign our souls away as a nation. Most state rights have already been taking away (and I'm not even the hugest supporter of that but I'm definitely not a fan of a big government or big brother for that matter) and the government already controls a lot. This will just make everything a bigger mess.

2. BP. Also known as British Petroleum. BP is currently advertising as striving to be more environmentally friendly. Hmmm... too bad they're not humananely friendly... There was an accident at a BP plant in Texas City, TX and people died. Sure, accidents happen. However, Amaco, who had previously owned the plant, was all about the safety of their employees and took all the precautions they could. BP was not even striving for these safety procedures whenever they took over the plant. How would I know? Because that's where my dad used to work... before he was laid off...

So where's Ronald Reagan when you need him? Dude... Amanda Manning was wearing a Ronald Reagan shirt this morning... that's so awesome... if someone sees her please ask her where she got it!

So VBS was more fun today, however, after an unfortunate mistake, I have decided that if I ever do this again, I'm working with 2nd graders!

Here's my story: so Clint and Trevor are talking about some dancer that was popular in 1990 and so I pondered aloud, "Wow, I was four." Then this litte runt of a 6th grade boy looks at me and asks: "You were four in 1990?!" And I was like: "Yeah, I guess y'all weren't even born yet." And then he looks at me and he's like: "How old are you?" I proceed to tell this obvioulsy blind 12 year old that I am 18 and then he's like, "Oh, I thought you were one of us." WHAT?!

First off, Clint specifically told the children yesterday that I was helping out and that I was about to go to MTSU, and the kid was there yesterday. Secondly, since when do I look like a 12 year old?! Oh brother... I figure if I work with 2nd graders, there'll be no mistakes! I just thought 6 years would be a big enough difference.

Anyhow, aside from that, things were good this morning. My favorite part was snack time because we all get to sit in a big circle and talk while eating off-brand M&Ms that didn't taste too great.

Anyhow, so Laser Tag was fun. I got 13th once and 14th the second time (out of 28) which isn't great but it's good for me. Lauren... I loved talking to you at the mall! Amy... I'm pretty sure I'm going to Paint the Town! I'm excited...

Thanks Nathan for the 24 remarks yesterday! I wasn't too terribly disapointed... ha ha.

Random VBS quotes from various children:
"Mr. Clint..."
"Yo, I have dreadlocks and a tripped-out Cadillac." (or something like that...)
And Trevor:
"Stop that piano playing! There aren't any pianos in Yellowstone!" *kid stops playing piano* "Now, listen to the sounds of nature."
Quick convo with Lindsey Kittel:
"How are you?"
"Worn out. I'm working with four year olds."
"Yeah, that would do it!"

*EDIT* If anyone wants to go bowling tonight you can call Garrett or Graham or me for details.

So, I couldn't sleep last night, and then my mom waked me up early. I called Chris and asked if they could use some extra help with the 6th grade and he said sure he guessed they could.

So I went to VBS this morning. It wasn't really what I expected, but it was fun. I didn't have much personal interaction with the kids, but I didn't really mingle with them much either, so I suppose that's my own fault. Maybe I'll do better tomorrow now that I've gotten a day down and I'll be more comfortable. Anyhow, seeing Clint run up on stage with Trevor, watching Chris dance during the music time, and calling Clint "Pixie Dust" after he was doused in glitter... wow... it was all so priceless.

So if there's a Black History Month, why isn't there an Asian History Month, and a Hispanic History Month? Just curious... I was thinking about that while watching Family Matters earlier.

Great quote from yesterday: "All I did was look at the mirror and I broke it!" -Brian (read Grace or Mady's Phusebox for the back story on that)

Speaking of Brian, why does he always have 24 remarks per post? Just a thought...

If you haven't read my previous entry from last night you should... lots of funny pictures from Anna's birthday get together...

"This is my bunny. His name is Tiny. I feed him a lot. Five times a day." -little girl from Daddy Day Care (which I am currently watching)

Laser tag tonight... whoo hoo...

photo from SingAHappySong



photo from SingAHappySong



photo from SingAHappySong



photo from SingAHappySong

Tonight was awesome. Jenna, Graham, Amy A., Aimee D., Brian, Cameron, Anna, Renfroe, and I met up at Blue Coast Burrito for Anna's birthday celebration. Then we went to Starbucks and saw Rachael, Rebekah, Sarah, Cari, and Elizabeth. Jenna had to leave early, but the rest of the birthday crew ended up going to the mall. As if we weren't already having the fun... the fun cranked up even more! Graham posed with various girly items of clothing and everyone else was being goofy as well. I had probably snapped about twenty shots in Aeropostale when one of the workers politely tells me that it's against store policy to take pictures... wow... too bad I've already taken so many! Lol... fun fun times...

photo from Beautiful_Wreck

I liked this picture so much I stole it from Amy Amonett. That's what summer is all about... I want to run throuh a sprinkler...
I don't really have much to say except I wanted everyone to know that I am praying for all of you. So many times I'll tell someone I'll pray for them when I hear they're going through a hard time, and then I never do... or I pray for them once. I've read a lot of entries from y'all, however, where you express confusion or pain or a lot of other things going on in your life. I am seriously and really praying for y'all, and I am here if you need me. I love you all.
I'm also reading a lot of entries about VBS and I feel left out. It's my own fault for not signing up, but I was depending on the junior high VBS. I love working with that age group but I really haven't had much of a chance... yet... that's something I still need to pray about...