Brian was killed by Kelly tonight with a knife at Davy Crockett's.



photo from SingAHappySong

I also ate the worst $7 meal in my life, and I spilled my water all over Kelly (sorry again girl!) but it was still pretty fun. Most of all, I'm excited for Clint and Rachel and their new baby! YAY!

So... everyone... well maybe I shouldn't say everyone... but a lot of people are really learning a lot right now. I don't feel like I'm drifting away from God, but I don't feel any closer. But this morning I kept reading about how God is always working even we don't see it. So that is what I standing on and believing in... I don't feel anything or see anything, but He's still there, working in my life, probably preparing my heart for my upcoming trip...

photo from SingAHappySong

I uploaded some more pictures from the Valentine's Day banquet (I only had one before, and Brian was apalled that he was not in it... but of course, he not only acted in the play but wrote it). So seeing these pictures again reminded me how much I really love to act. And even though I don't think that acting is a large part of my future, I still think this is a talent God gave me to use and enjoy. So where this leads I do not know... it may be as simple as co-leading the creative team this upcoming year...

I can't stop thinking about college... I am so excited about the opprotunity to branch out and learn so many new things...

Putting together my new bulletin board…



photo from SingAHappySong

My new bulletin board… (If you’re looking at this and thinking “I am one of Amy’s best friends, where I am on this?" then you’re probably somewhere else in my room)



photo from SingAHappySong

Contemplating how the things I will need for NY will fit into a small suitcase…



photo from SingAHappySong

Thinking about college…



photo from SingAHappySong

*EDIT*
P.S.
Yahoo story says of Bush's Supreme Court Justice nominee... I thought it was funny...

"Abortion rights groups allege that Roberts, while deputy solicitor general during former Bush's administration, was hostile to women's reproductive freedom..."

If you had told me at the beginning of my freshman year... I wouldn't have believed you...

I never would have believed that I would have the opprotunity to go to England for a mission trip.

I never would have believed that I would have the chance to go to Orlando for a leadership conference and bond with some pretty amazing people.

I never would have believed I would have moved from Texas to Tennessee between my sophomore and junior year.

I never would have believed that I would finish my high school years at a public school that was not Clearbrook (the school I desperately wanted to go to my 9th grade year).

I never would have believed how not too bad such a huge transition would be for me.

I never would have believed that I would meet such a great guy and started dating him in high school, and not college.

I never would have believed I would find friends as crazy as me.

I never would have believed that I would travel to New York City three times before attending college.

I never would have believed all of those things, but they happened. And they are such blessings from God. When we follow God, he blesses us... not always with money and things... but sometimes with opprotunities, relationships, daily experiences. When I think about all that God has done in my life the past four years... wow... and just to think... that He wants to be actively involved in the next four years... who knows what could be in store for me!

I leave for NY (for the 3rd time) this Sunday. I'm not as excited as I should be, but I should be as I reflect on all these things God has done for me. Please pray for me, that God will prepare me for this trip, and that He would blow me away. I know He wants me to go, and the group of people I'm going to be with is awesome... just little fears and worries from Satan... but God has bigger and better things in mind... Jeremiah 29:11-13...

Here are some pictures, just like I promised. I threw in a couple of bear pictures... just for you Nathan...

Packing…



photo from SingAHappySong

Relaxing at my aunt and uncle’s…



photo from SingAHappySong

Mom getting attacked by Lucy, the demon dog…



photo from SingAHappySong

Still in love after all these years…



photo from SingAHappySong

My goofy granddaddy…



photo from SingAHappySong

Good movie…



photo from SingAHappySong

I’ve got a golden ticket…



photo from SingAHappySong

Bears like Willy Wonka too… (all of these minus one belong to my aunt and uncle)



photo from SingAHappySong

Stopping for a photo…



photo from SingAHappySong

Fourteen months with Garrett today... but I don't get to see him. I'm still is MS... but I come home tomorrow. Saw Charlie and The Chocolate Factory... and it was pretty good. I wore my brand new white capris... and they got muddy. Oh well. It was still a good day!

If you are as crazy about pictures as I am, you have to check some photo contest winner entries at smithsonianmag.com. They're awesome! I wish everything in life was that beautiful... that's why I love photography... I love the way it captures the most beautiful and precious things in life...

And some things... if only you could capture them... memories, emotions, feelings...

Speaking of pictures, I will have a few MS pics to upload when I get home... whoo hoo...

Anyhow, I haven't done much today in MS. Mom and I shopped earlier and right now I'm up to nothing until Mom picks me up to go see Granddaddy again. I come home Sunday... and then I go to NY the week after next, which is totally surreal to me right now...

This morning my aunt showed my mom and me pictures from a cruise she and my uncle took a few years ago. Actually, most of the pictures were taken by the woman who took care of their cabin. Oh, and the pictures were of bears... with various props... LOL... I am NOT the only one!

I'm ready for college. I think. I hope.

"...we are living in this beautiful, broken world..." -Warren Barfield

Today was kinda rough... but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

First off, my trip down here went well. Everything went smoothly and we had a good evening and night in MS. Today, we visited my granddad in the hospital. There's some things you have to know about my granddad before I continue...

He was a Marine in WW2. He was a pastor. He used to take walks in the mall for exercise. He loves people and he loves to laugh and cut up. He's just a crazy character. I knew his memory was slipping some, but I didn't think it would ever be bad enough to be Althiemer's (sp?). Well, today the doctor says he thinks that Granddaddy has a moderate case of it.

He didn't do bad at all though. He was cutting up, laughing, and be goofy. He had some memory issues, like with names and stuff, and I think that he imagined me being younger, but he still did really well. He knew who we were, and he never seemed to be agitated or anything of that sort. It was a blessing. It was also draining, however.

While he was crazy as usual, he also got real emotional. He was like a man on his death bed, who kept telling us how much he loved us and was proud of us and how much we meant to him. And he looked right at me and told me to enjoy life. To always find joy, and to always love. He kept saying he was crying tears of happiness because of what a great life he has had.

What seemed weird to me though, was later (or maybe it was earlier) when Grandma talked about how he had been depressed... saying that he wasn't any good and all that. I don't understand how my Granddad could say that. He has lived a long and fulfilling life. There is this incredible war story involving my Granddad where he should have died, but he didn't. God had plans for him.

He was a pastor and helped a lot of people. He raised a family. He still brings joy and laughter into my life and the lives of others. Oh, and he's still madly in love with my Grandma. I don't know how many times he looked over at his 77 year old wife and commented how beautiful and special she was... and that just rocks. One of the deepest desires of my heart is to grow old with a man who is that crazy about me.

So it was a special time, but afterwards, for a couple hours, I was so out of it. But it was a blessing to hear his words of wisdom. He's such an awesome man of God. Even though he doesn't talk about God all the time, I can still see that in him. Oh, and a pastor from a local Baptist church came in shortly before we left and prayed with us, and that was awesome.

So my friends, let us live, and love, and laugh.

THE GOOD: I changed my geology lab time to a better time that may be early, but at least I can go home earlier. My new lab is also a lot smaller than my old lab. And only one boy. Ha ha we will smite him. He'll probably be excited but I'll let him know I'm taken.

THE BAD: I leave for Mississippi today. We weren't supposed to leave for Mississippi until tomorrow. I love my family but... I'm afraid this may be a depressing trip... mainly because my grandfather is currently in the hospital... And I have to miss church both tonight and Sunday. Boo.

THE UGLY: My townhouse almost blew up last night. (In response to one girl, you may have lived in my complex before...) Ok, I am slightly exaggerating, but not too much. This time it happened at about 11. It smelled like something was burning, so I went downstairs to make sure we weren't on fire. Daddy was downstairs and explained that when he came home from work that the hot water heater was smoking! So he turned it off... and our house was saved... and I really, really hope it doesn't blow up while we're in MS... and oh so unfortunately, our fire alarm doesn't work either... so we need to get that problem fixed as well..

Anyhow, I am sorry I do not get to see all of you tonight. Oh, and in regard to two of the remarks, a FaceBook isn't really a journal, but just a profile of yourself and what you're doing in college. You can easily find other kids that go to your college or find old friends that go to other colleges and it's a good way to see what they're up to. Anyhow, I hope everyone has a great day... I'll try to keep y'all informed in Mississippi...

The phone rings. It's 1 something in the morning. "You have got to be kidding me," I think to myself. To my surprise, I hear my dad answer the phone. "Surely they are not asking him to come into work at this hour!" I thought.
I hear my mom and dad talking. What is going on? Not too long after the phone call, I hear another man's voice. WHY IS THERE A STRANGE MAN IN MY HOUSE AT THIS TIME?!
Every possibility of what could be happening is racing through my mind.
After hearing the man and my dad converse a while, I am relieved when my dad comes in my room and tells me that there is a leak in the house and that the dining room floor is soaked. Well if that's all, I can sleep in peace! Why did I have to wake up and worry about that?! Apparently Dad had been downstairs in the middle of the night and noticed the condition of the carpet.

More men came to my house this morning, and I have brought you yet another bear picture to illustrate the aftermath. There is also now a noisy fan in the dining room that is supposed to help this situation. Go figure!



photo from SingAHappySong

I got a FaceBook the other day, and it's pretty cool. I've been able to connect with a lot of people from Riverdale and I even found a girl I met at Customs and an old friend from Texas. Chances are that if you are reading this and you have a FaceBook, I have probably requested your friendship (if you have not confirmed it already). If you're a college kid and don't have one, you should get one because it's pretty neat. And yes, there is a bear picture involving this as well. I thought y'all might be happy to see our old friends again.



photo from SingAHappySong

Last night, I was reading Deuteronomy 2 and verse 7 popped out at me. You see, yesterday morning and last night Satan was throwing a lot of guilt my way. I know that guilt comes from Satan and conviction from God, but I felt like maybe somewhere buried in the guilt may have been some conviction. I was praying and I did feel a conviction. When God convicts, it may hurt, yet it's also beautiful, healing, restoring, and captivating. He was working on my heart, whispering to me how special I was to Him, how much He loved me, desired me... He was asking to me to give Him my troubles, and He would help me overcome them. He told me to not worry and to completely abide and rest in Him, and that He would take care of everything.

And He gave me Deuteronomy 2:7. I changed a few of the words to redirect the focus from the Israelites to me:

The LORD my God has blessed me in all the work of my hands. He has watched over my journey through many rough times. These 18 years the LORD my God has been with me, and I have not lacked anything.

I have not lacked anything. Why? Because God is all I need. How foolish it is of me to think otherwise.

So, I was watching 60 Minutes with my Mamaw, and they were talking about how this random podunk town in TN is getting like $185,000 from the Homeland Security Department for them to use in their tatics against terrorists... in case they actually really want to come to the random podunk town they've never heard of. So it was great, because the host of 60 Minutes sat down with the mayor of Podunk Town (aka TiptonVille) and asked, "Really, do you think AlQueda is going to come to TiptonVille?"

The mayor opens his mouth, and out comes the most hick accent EVER!!! The mayor replies (and just imagine this being said by an old dude with a hick accent) "Well if I was AlQueda I would come to TiptonVille because nobody would expect it!"

Right... like AlQueda has actually head of TiptonVille before...

Anyhow, then on the way home, Dad and I listened to Laura Ingram on the radio, and she is way cool. She was talking about how "people from the left" say that Iraq isn't our concern, and that we should only be concerned with AlQueda. If Iraq wasn't important to AlQueda, however, then why would they bomb London, in hopes that the would withdraw troops from Iraq just as Spain did last year?

Hmmm.... I mean, really!

And then there was the caller who thought that the Bush administration failed to see to the terrorist threat in the US and that's 9-11 happened. And then Laura was like news flash! Terrorists blew up stuff during the Clinton administration and he did jack! Was Bush supposed to be able to clean up 8 years worth of damage in 9 months? I don't think so...

Satan did a pyschological number on me this morning. I hate Satan.

I think I may be ready for some change. Not a huge, drastic change, just a little change... well... if you can call college a little change... ha ha... but I'm ready to go.

It's weird though, because I'm still not comfortable in the AO Sunday school class, and I'm actually wary of AO itself. And it's not even like I want to stay in youth forever... I don't know what it is.

It doesn't usually take me this long to adjust to change. Maybe I just don't like the fact that I'm a freshman again. Maybe it just makes me feel small, young... maybe even insignificant. Maybe I feel like the older college kids are way wiser than me, that I won't be able to connect with them, that they won't like me...

But that's a bunch of crap from Satan! I mean really, I already have a few older college kid friends, and they aren't like that at all. I need to stop being so negative and stop believing Satan's lies.

By the way Brian, I planned out your college path for you. After you left my house last night, I randomly flipped through my college catalog and placed my finger to your future. Just so you know, you're supposed to major in marketing and minor in leadership studies... LOL... ok, probably not, but Amy, Graham, and Garrett and I all had fun with the idea anyways!

First off, thanks for all the positive feedback on my bear post! That was the result of a terribly boring day... you're right Justin... I do need a job or something else to do... ha ha... Anyhow, I figure if I never get a job in media production or writing, I could always photograph stuffed bears for calendars...

Anyhow, I am declaring a movie night at my place tonight! I know, when does this happen? So I haven't decided on the movie yet, so you can feel free to bring one if you wish. Sorry Michael, we're not going to watch Hitch again! We should probably watch something we've all seen and can make fun of... those are always the best movie nights! Anyhow, the time is 7:00, and there will be snacks and drinks but no real food so please eat at least a light dinner before you come. I don't live in the condo anymore, so if you don't know where my new apartment is at you can call me and I'll let you know. I live significantly closer to most of y'all now than I used to! Anyhow, leave a remark if you plan to come!

photo from SingAHappySong

Read a devotional.



photo from SingAHappySong

Got ready for the day.



photo from SingAHappySong

Ate some lunch.



photo from SingAHappySong

Did some chores.



photo from SingAHappySong

Got on the computer.



photo from SingAHappySong

Listened to my iPod.



photo from SingAHappySong

Read chapter five of Between A Rock and A Hard Place.

1. I wish I could solve everyone's problems.

2. I wish I could make a music video. Or a movie. Or both.

3. I wish I could go to London... after everything over there clears up.

photo from SingAHappySong

So tonight was Jenna's party and that was fun. We were going to eat outside but then we had to run inside because impending doom came upon us. It was quite fun. And I dropped my hamburger. :-( I also almost killed myself twice on Jenna's stairs. And Aimee, Anna, and Jenna and I almost broke Mr. Brewer's hammock. But it was still a fun night. :-)

Quote of the night: "Lay on top of me!" -Anna to Brian

I don't like Hilary Clinton. She was griping about how Bush didn't give enough money to fight terrorism... and that would have prevented London being bombed... how??? Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about, so someone can explain it to me if I'm wrong, but a guy on MSNBC said that more money would not solve London's security problem. And I'm not sure how the American budget affects London's security.

Other quote of the night: "I don't like her and I can't stand the sight of her." -guy on MSNBC about Hilary

Hope y'all enjoy my new pictures...

This is Garrett's new GQ look...



photo from SingAHappySong

So everyone (unless you live under a rock) knows that line from the movie Spider-man. But really... do we live it out?

I'm not exactly a fan of war, but I know sometimes it's necessary. After 9-11, most everyone was ready for us to give the terrorists a piece of our mind. How soon we forget. Now most everyone grumbles and complains about the war... "why are we there, nothing's getting accomplished""... "it's all about the oil"... "Bush is an idiot and doesn't know what he's doing"... they totally forget how it all started.

Now, before all my Democrat friends think I'm totally dissing on them and refuse to read the rest of the post, I'm not so please hear me out.

So a couple of days ago I mentioned Live 8, which was to raise awareness for G8, a conference of the world's eight richest nations to discuss helping the poorer countries. Live 8 especially emphasized the AIDS situation in Africa. England, among the eight countries, has been an ally to America in many ways. Tony Blair and George W. Bush allied together to fight against the Iraqis. England has several troops helping us in the war.

Then today, London is attacked by terrorists.

Why? Because THEY ARE A THREAT.

I hope and pray London will not wimp out like Spain did last year and remove their troops to appease the terrorists. I hope that London will band together, stir up some righteous anger, and be more determined than ever to fight. Now it's personal. Now their reason to fight should be greater and more personal than ever.

England and America are two of the richest nations in the world. We hold a lot of power in this world. "With great power..." We have the great power, so what is our responsibility? To fight for what's right. Whether that means providing money, food, and healthcare for Africans or warring with terrorists, we should be responding to the call of great responsibility.

*EDIT*
***PANIC FROM A REPUBLICAN*** Why are my adverts allowing people to read about Bush lies and Anti-Bush stuff?????

photo from SingAHappySong

The Toby Mac concert was a lot of fun. I went with Anna and Patrick and we met up with Amy B., Aimee, Rachel B., Robin, Jason, and Alex. We had a blast! Anna and I screamed and jumped around when Toby started singing "Jesus Freak"... we were so afraid he wouldn't sing it! The people in front of us looked at us like we were nuts! Ha ha! It started getting real fun when it started sprinkling! I enjoyed the rain but I was glad it didn't start pouring.

Church tonight and then we get to go eat Mexican... yum... I'm hungry just thinking about it...

Martha Stewart's nickname in the slammer was M. Diddy. I just happened to think that was quite hillarious.

Garrett has a way of surprising me. He bought an iPod online yesterday... a regular iPod on sale for $250... only $50 more than my mini... and it holds five times more songs than mine does...

Speaking of my iPod mini, I now have 245 songs. I've been pretty slow about uploading songs from my CDs... and I haven't bought any from the iTunes store yet. I think I might soon though. I would encourage everyone with an iPod to check out the songs from the Live 8 concerts and buy a few. Some of the proceeds go toward the cause for Africa, and that's awesome! There are a few I decided to buy soon. However...

I noticed that all of the songs are by mainstream artists. The only Christian artist I know of even involved with Live 8 was Jars of Clay (unless you count U2, but Bono confuses me so much I don't bother to label them or him anything).

Am I the only one who sees the problem with this? I mean... as Christians we should be setting the example. There are many non-Christian artists involved with this that are soooo far away from God. As you scroll through the songs, note that some are labeled "explict". They don't know God! Why should they love the Africans enough to care for them? NOT TO SAY THEY CAN'T... BUT they don't even know about God's love like we do. We should be the leaders in caring for others. Sometimes, however, we fail at that role, and that's quite unfortunate... and quite sad.

Homemade ice cream + lots of hot fudge + fireworks + annoying smoke balls + pyro boys + funny conversations = one great night!

Happy Independence Day everyone! Not only does Independence Day mean a celebration of our country, our freedom, hot dogs, and fireworks, but also the Twilight Zone, one of my favorite shows!

Well, I really have nothing else to say right now, but I hope everyone has a great day! I hope to see some of you tonight at the fireworks celebration!

*EDIT*
Shopping with mom + Twilight Zone marathon + lots of fireworks + cool July night + hanging out with Garrett, Anna, Aimee, Graham, and Michael + wondering if I will ever make it out of MTSU's parking lot + one overpriced but yummy brownie = another great day!

Yesterday... I did not beat Garrett and his cousin at the water balloon toss. :( Yes, they won for the fourth year in a row. *Shakes head in dismay* Well I still had fun. And when I got home, Mom had a present for me... The Phantom of the Opera soundtrack!!!!!! :) That made me very happy.

Today... that one song this morning at church was so cool... the one with the little boy singing... it was so... eerie in a way. More like mysterious.... I don't know, it was just cool. I liked it. Also, one thing that was said at Sunday school made me think... even though I may believe something is morally wrong, but it is allowed anyways, I don't have to like it or approve of it... and though I have a right to vote against it or advocate against it, I don't need to make the hugest deal out of it. I don't really feel like I've been doing that, but I don't want to make that mistake in the future. I can't always convince others of what I believe is right and wrong because they have a different mindset than I do. Most of all, I just need to pray for this country more often.

About cell phones:
Garrett: Zach didn't know to turn his cell phone off before the service.
Me: Zach doesn't have a cell phone.
Garrett: That's why he didn't know.
Me: Zach, one day when you finally have a cell phone when you're like... 45, then you'll need to turn it off before someone begins to preach.
Zach: I'll most likely be the one preaching.
Me: Well then you most definitely will want to turn off your cell phone!

Brother Dean: President Bush will not allow cell phones to go off at one of his meetings. I think the church should be more like that.
*A few minutes later, a cell phone rings*

photo from SingAHappySong

This is a non-humanoid alien creature from the original Star Trek series. It looks like a volcanic rock in this picture, but on the show it looked like a huge puppy covered in sausage, sauce, and cheese. Therefore, Garrett and I named it Pasta Puppy!

I watched Phantom of the Opera again. That movie blows me away... the music is incredible...

Today I get to go to Garrett's annual family cookout. This should be fun... I went last year as well. Garrett's dad and I almost beat Garrett and his cousin (who have a reigning dynasty) in the water balloon toss last year... watch out Garrett...

So this morning at VBS, God reminded me that obeying His way is always the best way. It may be scary at first, and I may not like the idea, but if I follow Him and obey Him, He will give me an awesome joy and peace. I've seen this so many times throughout my life.

So we were watching another one of those cheesy Lifeway VBS videos this morning and it was about a missionary in Hollywood. As I watched the video, some thoughts poured into my mind... the same thoughts I've had many times before: we need Christians in Hollywood making movies, producing movies, writing movies, acting in movies. Then I realized: what if God called me to do that? I've always said I would love to make a movie, write a screenplay, do video production, but I have always very adamently said that Corrupt California is one place I will not go.

I've always thought that I could do movies in Nashville, or write screenplays and send them off, or just do music videos instead. When I lived in Texas I thought about one day moving to the Nashville area. Is that not my destiny? Maybe... but it also may be for only a season of my life. I don't have to live in one place for the rest of my life. (This has already been evident in my life... I have lived in four different states!) I'm not saying that God has called me to Hollywood... I still don't know what's in store. But I do know that I have to be open to it. I need to humble myself to do whatever God calls me.

Then today during snack time, the kids were making an awful mess with their ice cream toppings. It was getting all over the entryway floor, sprinkles were getting crushed in the grout, one girl spilled a drink... it was a huge mess! So I quickly finished my ice cream and went to the bathroom and got some wet paper towels. I got on my hands and knees and did the best job I could to clean the floor. I just did what I felt like I was supposed to do. Sometimes small tasks, however, can be used to make a big difference. It's all about obedience.

One other thing I've learned... last night I was having a quiet time and I was wondering why some people tend to revisit the same sin over and over even though they know it's wrong. I saw a note I had written in my Bible that said "hypocrisy is the act of pretending, not imperfection." (Garrett has recently written a similar statement on his Phusebox.) And I realized that these people were not being hypocrites, but imperfect, as we all are. And God called me out, because I do the same thing. I'm imperfect too. We all are.

And we all have to humble ourselves before God and listen to His call... no matter what it is or where it is... even if it's Hollywood.

*EDIT* I liked it a lot better when all my Google ads were about toothbrushes... now they're all about BP and math... two thinks I despise...