So, the girl. She was at church last night. Praising God with all of her big heart. It was beautiful. I'm just so excited.

On a different note, i started up an invisible childrens club in my community about 2 months ago, and being a leader is harder than it looks. I'm stressing. Prayers for my strength and faithfulness would be greatly appreciated.

You guys are amazing, i love you.

and i'm praying for you all! asdflkj<3

For TWO YEARS i have been praying that my friend would find her way back to Christ. She fell from God due to a relationship with a non-believer. As soon as i got online tonight, she IM'd me and confessed to me that she had only been giving half of herself to God, if that! She told me how lost and broken she was, how she felt that she has been missing out on what God was saying to her and trying to do through her life, and how she wants to get back to Christ. the wait is over, my heart is no longer burdened for her. She has found her way back, which is a [i'm sad to say] rare thing. Two years,  my goodness we serve an awesome God.

[as for those of you that have been leaving remarks, i'm so sorry i haven't gotten back to you. i'm not recieving email notifications.. so i rarely check this, so again, i'm so sorry but you're all so kind! thank you!]

For the first time since i made my breakthrough. Breaking out of depression, i'm sitting here sobbing.  Looking at all of my friends, their pictures, their best friends.  Why can't i have that!? Why can't i be so open to love, and so open to be close to people. I'll tell you why, because every adult, that is supposed to be a role model, a spiritual leader, has turned out to be fake and untrustworthy. My best friend won't even confide in me anymore, we aren't even best friends anymore!? Who am i to talk to?  My old friends barely stay in contact with me anymore, maybe that's my fault. I just can't get close to anyone anymore. I build up this wall, that even i can't break down. This is such a lonely place. I don't know what to do. I have no idea.

i need to go read.

calm my nerves.

take a step out of my life and into someone elses.

help me please?

because so far, i'm not getting a whole lot of feedback on this thing, which is fine because... this is just a good way for me to vent,  but anyways..

Some recent things going on in my life.

It's my first camp without my best friends going with me next week. I'm kind of nervous, but i think without my best friends though, i won't feel as limited and i'll open up more to make new friends. Definitely going in with a prayerful heart about that.

Also, i'm adding another name to the Invisible Children United Club list. I've decided to start a club at my church. No one knows yet, except my youth minister who is behind me 100% so, i'm sharing it all with my youth group tomorrow. And we're going to get a team together, plan events thoughout the whole year to raise money for the Invisible Children. I'll keep you updated on how things go. I think after i get the word out tomorrow, our first official meeting will be on Friday. so i tell you how it all goes. and what we plan out. Oh and if you could just really pray for that, that would be amazing. We're ready to change the world.

Anyways.

I'll ramble on later.

I haven't been sleeping well lately, so i'm going to try to get some sleep now.

byeee.

Actually, asdf;lkj i'm not really concerned with impressing anyone at this point. This just seemed interesting.

Fill this out in YOUR OWN WORDS

1. Where did you take your default pic? Bonus Room.

 2. What exactly are you wearing right now? A tshirt from when i was in middle school "SMS Pride" and basketball shorts.

 3. What is your current problem? Figuring out how i'm going to start this ICU club. goodness this is overwhelming.

 4. What makes you most happy? Worshiping/Serving God.

 5. What’s the name of the song that you're listening to? Wagon Wheel - Old Crow Medicine Show.

6. Has anyone you've been really close with passed away? Yes.

7. Do you ever watch MTV??  It's a last resort channel for me, so, rarely.

 8. What’s something that really annoys you?  the tv volume not being on an even number.  yeah, ocd.

Chapter 1:

1. Middle name: Elizabeth.

2. Nickname(s): Sal, SallyFatHands.

3. Current place? Bonus Room.

4. Eye color: Green on the outside, yellow around my pupil.

---------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 2:

1. Do you live with your parents? Dad.

 2. Do you get along with your parent(s)? Eh, most of the time.

 3. Are your parent’s married/separated/divorced? Divorced

 4. Do you have any Siblings? One sister.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 3: Favorite...

1. Ice Cream: Cookies & Cream.

 2. Season: Fall

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 4: Do You..

1. Write on your hand: All the time.

2. Call people back: most of the time.

3. Believe in love: With all my heart.

4. Sleep on a certain side of the bed? I prefer the left, but whatever.

 5. Have any bad habits? Nail biting.

 6. Any mental health issues? A little OCD, and i'm ADD. but who isn't these days right?

----------------------------------------------------

Chapter 5: Have You....

1. Broken a bone: wrist.

 2. Bought new stuff in the last two weeks: iPod.

3. Had physical therapy?: Yes

4. Gotten stitches: Yes.

 5. Taken painkillers? Yes.
6. Gone SCUBA diving or snorkeling: Yes. Hawaii FTW.

7. Been stung by a bee? Yes.

8. Thrown up at the dentist: Ew, no.

9. Ever sworn in front of your parental? "hell" but that's about it.

10. Had detention: In middle school.

11. Been sent to the principal's office? Not for being in trouble.

12. Been suspended: No.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 6: Who/What was the last

1. Movie(s) you watched?: The Glass House.

 2. Person to text you: Andrew.

 3. Person you called: Leslie.

4. Person you hugged? Casey.

5. Last person you tackled: I'm not quite sure. I tackle people on a regular basis. it's hard to keep track.

6. Thing you touched: Keyboard.

7. Thing you ate: Grapefruit.

8. Thing you drank: Green Tea.

9. Time you cried: Jamaica.

10. Wished on a star: I don't wish, i pray.

Yeah, so i'm really excited about Heaven.

Not in a morbid, "i can't wait to die", kind of way.

I'm just so excited. It's going to be amazing.

Beyone amazing even. Completely indescribable.

Just to know that for believers in Christ, what we experience here on earth, will be the worst we will ever experience. Because in Heaven there is no more hurt, sadness, pain, loneliness, ANYTHING BAD!  Oh my goodness, i'm so excited right now.  Just that a loving God, would let a wretch like me, someone so undeserving of such a magnificent place as Heaven, walk through those gates and spend eternity with Him is mind blowing. Ah, i hope you're as excited as I am. And if you're not, you and God should have a serious talk a.s.a.p.

GET EXCITED!

Oh, we are bruised and destined to lose doing this alone.
Oh, let it fall and cover us all – this grace that’s not our own.
- Nevertheless.

:]

So this might be the most spontanious trip i've ever taken.
Here's how the conversation went yesterday...

Me-"Leslie, we really need lives."
Leslie -"We really do."
Me- "dude, let's take a road trip."
Leslie-"Omg, yes!"
Me-"I have nothing to do for the rest of the week & i can leave tomorrow"
Leslie-"same here, i just have to be home by 11am on saturday"
Me-"omg. well meet me at 10 am tomorrow at my house & we'll go"
Leslie-"yay! alright. see you then."

And it's really happening.
So in less than an hour, we're going to be on the road
Heading 8 hours away, to some beach in Alabama.

:]

I'm really hoping God has something insanely cool planned for us through this trip.

oh my goodness i'm so excited.

Okay, so we've been out of school for the past two days. Well when we found out we were out of school, after church some of the guys & girls went out to eat to celebrate. :]

Welllll, we got into a mini food fight. then i declared that thursday-sunday.. it's war. So we've been pulling these amazing pranks. and last nights was the best.

Okay, so we have 50 acres of land. And all the girls who were at dinner on wednesday night came over, and the boys were coming too. but they were acting funny so we knew they were up to something. so we filled huge super soakers with vinegar & pickle juice, got shaving cream, all that fun stuff & prepared ourselves for them. Well, sure enough.. i saw them trying to drive up my 1/2 driveway in a truck with no lights on. And then i saw them get out of the car, and run into my fields. so all the girls went outside. started crawling through the fields. finally like.. 20 minutes later. everyone just starts screaming & running towards each other. pickle juice, vinegar, shaving cream, silly string flying all over the place. they had NO idea it was coming. they thought they had us good. they ended up getting so mad because they knew they lost. [pretend mad of course] but they know we son.  it was the most fun i've had in a while. i absolutely love my family. [church family that is]

anyways.
moral of the story..
Girls Dominate. All the time. No questions asked.

oh yeah.
and that should explain the face paint in the new pictures.
haha we went all out for this. it was like Braveheart. no joke.

Well, i talked to my dad today.

Apparently we're moving in 6-8 weeks. i won't be changing schools. but it's still kind of sad. i love this house. so many memories. but at the same time, i think this could be a very good thing. The past 2 years haven't exactly been the best, so this could be a great way to start over, just kind of.. refresh everything. we're getting rid of old stuff that we never use & all that great stuff. Right now, i guess i just have mixed feelings about all of this.

I am excited about my room though. I have had plans for decorating my room for foreverrr but my dad is always like "no because we might be moving".. so now i know that we are, and that in my new room i can have it just like i want it. The theme is going to be black and white. and every wall is going to be insane. PLUSSS. today i went down to the music room in our basement, and got all of my dads best records, they are going to be on one of the walls. it's going to me awesome.

asdlf;kj he has some of the best records.

okaybyeee.

p.s. hey you, remember where you used to keep our conversations hidden. something's waiting for you there. if you ever get the chance. then again, you probably don't even know i'm talking to you.

:]

I need prayer.

This week has been the worst. i've spent the past 2 years trying to build my trust level again. [because things happened in my family that really caused me to not be able to trust anymore.] I was doing this with the help of a youth leader. Only to find out, this person wasn't the most trustworthy either. Knocking my trust level back to zero. I feel as if everyone i get close to isn't honest with me, or leads a complete double life. they use me & lie to me. i don't know what to do anymore. i want to shut off the world completely. Honestly, i'm angry at God a little for allowing this to happen. But i've stayed in the scripture trying to make sense of all of this. maybe it just needs time.

& Now, what i ask of you is that you pray for me, that i may have a forgiving spirit towards all of this, that i have strength to say that this won't hinder my walk with Christ, that it will be a stepping stone to build my relationship with Him, and make me smarter for the future. right now, all of that seems so out of reach. But i'm trusting the power of prayer. and support from my brothers & sisters in Christ.

Love you all.

<3

Okayyyy.

I talked to the boy today about his language again. & we started arguing. well, the weird thing was, today, what shut him up & i think got him thinking, was not scripture. It was actually, something more simple. He told me he just liked to use those words because liked the passion behind them. And i told him, if you want to speak with the same passion, do it with your voice. not your words. you can state something, with no foul language, but STILL show as much passion for the subject by the tone in your voice. it's not that hard.

he understood.
& didn't cuss for the rest of the class. Now, who knows what all he said after that class. [it was only first block] but hey, it's a start right?

Anyways.

i have a test tomorrow over the first 4 chapters of frankenstein.. guess what chapter i'm on...

zero.

[thanks for all the help on my last blog<3<3<3]

peaceout.

So i'm almost positive every highschool christian has come across this. because especially in today's time, it'd be impossible not to. well, i guess homeschooling, okay but that's besides the point.

Friday i was faced with the question of "well, society tells us it's a bad word, but is it a "bad word" or is it just a word that has extreme passion behind it that people make to be a bad word?"

Well, i gave the boy Ephesians 4:29 it says "Do not use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good & helpful , so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them"

... Then he goes back to the question and says "well i understand abusive words, but foul language, how do you know what's a bad word?.. just because society tells us it is. "

and i don't know.. it just really threw me off. it's like.. for the first time in my life i was actually speechless. i had nothing to say.

But then i asked him "well. would you say those words in front of God?".. that kind of shut him up.

but i think i need to know more before i talk to him tomorrow.

help?

Sooo.
It was my first day back and well.. i'm proud to say it was not half as bad as i expected. it was actually.. great!

Except, just like i predicted, the class with all the juniors. but i discovered, I'm not meant to be in that algebra 2 class anyways. it's my weakest subject & especially with the teacher, i'd fail big time. So it is an honors class, and i'm going to have to drop to a standard class for like the first time everrrr. but i'd rather pass a standard class, than stress my face off & fail an honors class. so that's the decision i've come to.

If you've started back to school, i wish you good luck in your classes. :]

Words cannot describe how bad i DO NOT want to go to school tomorrow.

My first block is a class with all freshman.
My second block is a class with all juniors.
My third block is a class with mostly seniors.
And my fourth block is a class with most of my friends.. but i haven't even done the summer reading yet. not cool.

I'm really not looking forward to second block, mostly because i'm not too fond of the juniors at our school. they are known for being snobby & slutty. [not judging. i've known them all long enough to say it's true.] not to mention.. they are all non christians. But i guess i can just use this as an opportunity to share Christ. .. yeah..  that's what i'll do.

But still...the Lord better get ready because there will probably be non-stop praying from me in that class.

On a good note, today was a pretty good day, spent some time with my mom. haven't seen her in about 3 weeks, so that was nice. Got a little shopping done, that's always nice. so yeah.

well, happy day before i got back to school day to all of you.

: /

You can never walk away from Xtreme without being changed.

Also, Tony Nolan never ceases to amaze me. And neither does Josh McDowell, with every time they speak, they speak, with the same passion, as if it was their first time.
Truely inspiring.

(seeing Jeremy Camp, Third Day, Newsong, Kutless, and Unhindered wasn't bad either. :]]]] )

& This may not mean a whole lot to you, but for every chapter 40, there is a 41.

Just looking around the pictures, seeing so many people with their family christmas pictures & whatnot. it makes me miss that with my family. because, i guess in order to have a family picture, you need an actual.. family.

but it's okay.
i'll just have to stick with friend & church family pictures
since they are the closest i have.

& that's okay with me.. for now at least.
but man, what i would give to just take one more. all of us together, genuinly happy, nothing fake. just.. us as a family.

[two posts in one day. crazyness.]

Oh yes, it's 3:00, and the rest of my day will be spent getting packed & pumped for Extreme.

Alsooo.
I'm already getting stuff started for M-Fuge this year. This year, my church isn't even going, it's just me, my best friend Leslie, and our old youth leader. and we're heading to Ecuador. i couldn't BE more excited. International M-Fuge is by far my favorite of the fuges. Last year was Canada. ugh. haha i don't even know if you guys know what i'm talking about.. either way.. if you hear of any church groups near you going to and sort of fuge.. go.

And praise God for this insanely gorgeous day.

:]

AND I'M FEELING GOOD.

Today was one of the most uneventful days i've had in a while... Praise God.
I needed it for sure.

& now i'm hanging out with casey, & about to put up some pictures we just took.

But i did learn a lot today. Learned a lot about "friends".. and i learned a quote that i feel will take a lot of stress out of my life..

"The only people you NEED in your life are the ones that PROVE they need you in theirs."

Oh yes, get excited. Sally's back. So much has been going on in my life. A lot has changed.  And obviously so much is going on around phusebox. so many more people it's great.

Well, i want to see what kind of response this gets. If i see that people around here are really interested in what i have to say, i might stay, but otherwise.. i don't just like to write for myself, i know what's going on in my life, haha i just want to share it with people who care. So. We'll see how this goes & maybe i'll stick around.

eh, im just done. you guys have been great. but im just done. I just wish you all good luck in everything you do. Stay strong in Christ. &.. well phusebox.. Have a nice life.

In Him,
Sally =]