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thinking.....
January 24, 2009i have to be silent.i have to keep my mouth quiet, i have to keep my lips closed. no words can slip out, no screams can escape, no tears can fall from my eyes, no fast beating heart can be heard. i have to be silent.
i have to be still. i cant huge, i cant reach for a hand, i cant lock eyes. no running with joy to welcome, no extra big smiles, no walking alone to talk. i have to be still.
i have to be calm. no wondering thoughts, no worring, no stressing what others think. no fights, no crying, no wanting for something i cant have. i have to be calm.
random writing.
January 02, 2009just feel like writing.
Some people cry for no reason.
Some people smile because they feel like it.
Some people love with all their heart.
Some people hate for fear of love and pain.
Some people run away from their fears.
Some people face their fears.
Some people miss others.
Some people never get close enough to miss someone.
*****
he sees her from a far, he can see her beauty from a distance. He can see her laugh and remembers how he used to love hearing her laugh. He looks away in fear she will catch him watching and wishing to have her back. But he cant help himself for he finds himself watching her goof off with her friends.
she looks up and locks eyes with him. (all the while laughing) her laughter stopped but niether of them looked away. His thoughts along the lines of how badly he messed up with letting her go. and her thoughts along the lines of how much it hurt when he pushed her away but how much she misses him still.
he looks away and she realiZes who he was talking to..a bunch of little girls. her heart sank, because for a moment she thought maybe just maybe he still liked her. what she didn't know was he was deeply in love with her but he was to scared to hurt her perfectly amaZing heart again. he didn't trust himself to keep her safe so he stayed away in hopes to keep her safe.
random, i'm just really bored.
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December 11, 2008hey people. whats up? hows life?
Nothing much here..well there is alot but i know you people dont care so i'm not gonna write it all down. no point.
well i'm just gonna talk about today
...today was long and now it is time for me to sleep. but at the moment i'm just chilling, messing around on myspace, talking to steele, thinking about not wanting to wake up in the morning,i'm super freakin excited about the memphis trip!!!! we leave tomorrow afternoon! HECK YES!..and thats about it. yeah i know tonight is a real party for me. well hope you guys are doing well.
love ya.
.-.
November 29, 2008I'm bored and feeling like writing. I also feel like being heard.
Why do we help those that hurt us the most? Why do we lose ourselves in trying to help others find themself? Why do we have many many sleepless nights helping and praying for others when they dont do one small thing as say hey to you? Why do we love those who dont love us back?
Its because we know who they are. Its because we want the best for them even if they dont want it for us. Its because we see the light in their eyes even if they have yet to see it. Its because we know one day when their world comes crashing down they know they can come to us for help.
And that is why the way we are is the way we are.