forget this.

I am frustrated.
yesterday was good
when I talked to certian people.
some people just make me laugh/smile
others just, arrg
but it doesnt matter
it's none of my business
everytime I try to help
it always goes
bad bad bad
so I shouldnt try right?
hmm...
pondering on what I need to do
lecturing sure didnt help
plus no one in their right mind
wants to listen to that.
I am going to go listen to some music
the kids are still sleeping
I have time before I have to put on
the happy face for them
just because someone ruins my day
doesnt mean I have to ruin theirs.

I hope be home until 3:30
unless I go to swimming class
for my baby sis & brother.
try to call though, please.

I love you,
Jamie

-a dang edit
here donald:: xanger banger
it's alot more, colorful
&& I couldnt find any hellogoobye songs :[

pull my hair x 8: a long long time ago... i can still remember how that music used to make me smile and I knew if I had my chance that I could make those people dance and maybe they'd be happy for a while

I love that boy. probably more than he knows.

babysitting was okay. I lived as you can see
man, I am feeling so happy. it's weird
havent felt like this in a long long time.

I love you.
going to think.
Jamie

I think this Bible study will help me out alot
last night was so much fun, I couldnt stop laughing
I think it will help me out with more of who I am

babysitting for two weeks straight
wont have a life unless it's after 4
or on the weekends
thank God above that the kids start school
2 weeks earlier than me lol
so I'll still have two weeks of summer left
&& alot of cash to spend.
I think I might go white water rafting? lol

well I still think those two certain people
are the sweetest in murfreesboro
unless you think you cant beat what they said.
you dont find guys like that anymore.
sweet..

well talk to you later.
I love yooou.
Jamie

O is for the only one I see

discovery you starts today
I've always like the bible stuides.
it helps me know myself more
all my wants && needs in life

I love meeting new people.
ones that make you smile from the start
I've met two people like that this week
one is Josh
two is Donald
sweeeet people.

update when I get back.
I love you.
Jamie

ohio=amazing
rode every ride.
made new friends

woke up just to have time to write this entry.

I am leaving today :] yayayayayayayay.
I stayed up allll night with tiffany
because I was too excited to sleep.
well we might have squeezed in 3 hours of sleep
but hey! we have a whole 6 hour van trip to sleep haha.

I love ohio
I love rollercoasters
I love pecans
I love my relienkt k c.d
I love my wondeful, faithful mp3 player
I love toooooooooooooby mac
I also love yall & will miss you very very much.

have fun without meeeee. be back sometime saturday.

Jamison, haha lariesa

I love you && that's what you are getting your self into.

I am going to Ohio tomorrow. :]
oh yessss, I cant wait.

DOM_HLL you know, if I knew you.
I would probably go to your house alot
because I have no friends where I live haha.

I'll miss ya && I love ya.
Jamie

please go to my xanger banger.
it is awesome beyond awesome.
leave a commeto too :]
coolness
ahahah tiffany.

DOM_HLL: ok, let me get this straight.. so girls want a guy who is sensitve, caring, and is not afraid to show emotions and can do all this around other guys.... so in other words u want ur boyfriend to act like a girl but u DON'T want them to gay... lol take care and keep smiling

man oh man last night was pretty gggreat.
not one of the best fourth of july's I've had
but still pretty good.
I couldnt go to claire's because
my dad decided "hey, let's have a cookout over here"
so I was left alone until tiffany came over
which was about uhhhh 7?
the food was allll amazing && the fireworks were just beautiful.

butbutbut I have to tell you. I met someone.
not someone I am considering dating.
but a very sweet someone & kinda cute at that
he could do some things to look waaaaay better
but I liked his personality
his name is stanley, yes like that show haha
but he came over &&
first asked us if we wanted to go watch MTSU fireworks with them
but I couldnt, because of how my dad is
but he came back later & talked to us
we sat on his truck for awhile but
went back to my house & sat on the blankets
to talk && watch fireworks.
awe but he gave my sister & her friend handshakes
but tiffany && I hugs lol
my sister's friend said it was
because me && tiff had boobs
hahaha hilarious right?
very sweet guy though. sr in highschool, family lives across the street haha.
lucky me?
nonono I'm not looking right now.
I'm focusing my life more to God right now.

hope yall had a wonderful fourth of juuuuuly.
have a great day :]

I love you.
Jamie

p.s;; 2 more daaaaaayssssss til O-H-I-O

sidewalk chalk. how lovely
I got extremely bored & I color every
sidewalk block at my house. very colorful heh.

happy fourth of juuuuuuly by the way!
mmmmm cookouts= food. heh
&&&& Jamie + fireworks = x_x
uh oh. lol

3 more days til O-H-I-O
cant wait, cant wait, cant wait.

i.m me please, I am terribly bored today.
but hyper so I need to let it all out on someone
maybe listening to relient k or hellogoodbye will help.

I love you all dearly.
Jamie

I cant wait til Thursday. I mean I am just not sitting still at all. I mean alot of kids get homesick, I was never ever one of those children. I was/am always ready to get away from my house haha. not that it's awful but it's boring :/ Thursday I get to seeeee toby mac, kutless, third day, casting crowns, etc etc in ohio :] yessssss. & I finally got over my fear of heights so I will be going on alllllllll the rollercoasters in the amusement park. -sighs- haha.

random facts about me =]

i love dancing to hellogoodbye
i love chocolate & twislers
i love singing even if I suck, or do I?
i love scrapbooking
i love my God, he's amazing
i love talking
i want to go to ohio now!
i wanna take a roadtrip to california
i like boys :] heh heh
i love adventures with claire, my best friend everrrrrrrrrr
i love goin to look at the clouds
i love music more than my bed
i wanna be in a relationship, a good one
i want to go back to new york
i wish someone would whisk me away somewhere like in those cheesy romantic movies & kiss me
i love taking pictures
i love chapstick
i love my mr. leo
i like reading sad stories, ones that make me cry like a baby
i want to meet wil ferrel [sp?]
i also want to meet tom cruise :] hahah
i want a car, so I can drive fast. lol
i want to hangout with claire or joshua
i love the way YOU smile
i love seeing old friends
i love flowers, especially white tulips
i hate people who constantly lie
i love my little sister
i love taking walks
i love jumping on my bed, it never gets old even if your about to turn 15
i want to see jack johnson in concert
i love my friends, even if I dont see them all the time
i want claire to be here, I'm bored :/
i want to go to the pool
i love gettin tan
i love going to the beach
i just love the way that person acts around me, it's cute heh
i wanna write all the time
i miss mcfadden
i wanna see cyla, my best friend in rochester
i like markers
i also love yoooou

p.s new pic :] ch-ch-check it out haha
I say, beastie boys came out with that song for one reason. it easily gets stuck into your head :/

I love you :]
I wish I could do the whole
he loves me, he loves me not
thing with the flowers.
I could but I dont know what's happening
hopefully I will be able to do it all.
I'm to confusing for guys. lol

wow well Tiffany stayed the night again lol. we went to sports com & stared at people, it was hilarious. then we came back to my house and rode on the bikes for quite a bit until it started raining. in that we were still riding our bike so we got soaked all over again. then after the rain it was pretty so we did sidewalk chalk. I swear I can be one of those people who draw on the sidewalks of new york lol. then we played -who wants to be a millionaire- on my computer because we got extremely bored. lol but we played that for like 2hours straight. it was crazy, and we were awfully stupid. well when I dont get sleep, I am either grumpy or crazy. so last night I was crazy and would laugh at anything. so we slept all night laughing and singing commerical jingles lol. :/

today we are going to chuck e cheese. yay what fun! lol and later after we take tiffany home we are going to go to sports com again. so I have a fun day ahead of me. I'm gonna go take a shower now.

thank you soooo much for the remarks :] you guys are the best. so have a wonderful day.

I love you,
Jamie

well the movie went quite well. I thought it was amazing. so I suggest you go see it :] it's one of those movies I'd see twice in theater. tom cruise is hott. even for a fourty something year old man. he is hott. haha so was the guy who played his son. -sighs- anyways if you want to know what I am talking about just go see the movie haha.

tiffany stayed the night. she is still here, sleeping haha. we stayed up until 4 & someone called at like 8:30 so I had to get up. I'm one of those people you cant fall back alseep so now I'm here typing this. :/ buuut we had fun. we watch -big fish- & -fear dot com- which was a little weird but cool at the same time lol. then we talked about boys, that's what we usually do. trying to make up our minds about things, trying to figues out why. I mean I dont understand myself when it come to boys. haha it's weird. but anyways, some of the things we talked about was hilarious. I had a great time "deep" talking about alot of things. I feel relieved now.

well I'll let ya go for now. I might come back later if me & tiffany go do something horribly stupid haha.

I love you.
Jamie

haha well I didnt get to go to the pool because it rained like there was NO tomorrow :/ but I stood out in the rain because it felt good. this is the 2nd time in a row that has happened. darn you sports com! haha but I came home & talked to people on aim mostly. yes I know, "how exciting". anyways one of those people was this guy that I met on phusebox which turned out to be my 2nd/3rd grade crush. hahah we rode the bus together. imagine that. but I like him, he's awesome. pretty sweet guy ;]

today I am going to my friend Tiffany's house, yesss I mean I dont think I have been anywhere but my best friend Claire's house this summer which isnt bad because no one can beat staying with claire. but I am also going to the movies to hopefully see, if it isnt sold out, war of the worlds. but if not we can always watch something else. correct? well it'll still be fun considering like 10-12 people are coming along with us. then I'm going to my awesome church. :] and tiffany is coming home with me afterward & staying the night. I wonder what kind of trouble we'll get in this time? hahah

well I hope your summer has been amazing. have a wonderful day you guys!

I love you,
Jamie

well I hope you guys liked my poem that I wrote yesterday, you can always go back and read it if you didnt.

tomorrow, wednesday, a bunch of my friends & I are going to the movies at carmike to go watch war of the worlds at four so if you wanna go, cmon! the more people, the more fun right? lol

babysat today mostly. we played outside with sidewalk chalk. it keeps them occupied for at least an hour. :] I am going to the pool here in a bit, yessss but I am serisouly in a swimming. maybe because I lost weight & I can fit into my favorite bikini again? why yes that must be it hahaha.

well I'll update later.
I love you,
Jamie

slowly, my heart is bleeding
from all your staggering words
my mind is so clouded
by all the hate & the hurt
between us there used to be so much love
what happened? where did it all go?
you left me here to cry
with my head in my hands
as the days go by
I drown my self in my sorrows
lying on the floor
crying, until there is nothing left to cry
repeating in a whisper to myself
"please come back, forgive me for whatever I did,
for whatever bruise I might have left on your heart"
I'll pick up every piece, if you give me a new start
first loves are always quite dramatic
oh the tragedy it causes me
I cant get you out of my head
or even my heart
I dream about you
at night & in the day
broken & bent
only you darling, can make it straight
my life in incomplete if you arent the one
to make everything okay...

okay okay, I did write this.
I do alot of writing, I have for awhile.
It get my emotions out all at once
so then I wont have to explode & take it
out on people :] ya know?

what is something you wish for?
what to you is unconditional love?
what in your words is"love"?
are you content with who you are?

I love you.
Jamie

what is something you wish for? something I wish for is, to live a better life. I just have made so many mistakes & I just want to be happier

what to you is unconditional love? uncondtional love? is definately God because he loves us no matter what.

what in your words is love? love is when you can look past the flaws and still love them for who they are. it's a feeling you feel, you know it's right

are you content with who you are? yeah, I'm pretty comfortable with who I am. I cant complain, I am blessed with so many great people & things. so yeah I am pretty content.

french is a pretty language is some ways lol, I love the word love in french, it's beautiful.

anyways nothing much happened today. cept I went to patterson park to swim & run. I feel great now. running is great once you get past the ache in you legs haha. but yeah I run when I get really stressed now. you push yourself so hard to get to the finish, it gives you someting to look forward to. I usually pray when I run now. I've been feeling so great with God, I talk to him alot now. since I know for sure he's always there for me when everyone lets me down. relient k also does some miracles. lol

I've already got six friends, oh how I feel so loved. I think I am getting to like this better than xanga :] it's pretty awesome. & so much better people to meet. plus I take so many pictures & now it's so much easier to show them off lol.

okay well that's enough to bore you today. haha. have a wonderful day. yall are amazing.

I love you,
Jamie

for you:: http://artpad.art.com/?iinmubrgrg4