don't worry though, i plan to buy it release day though!
----
what all was right's now wrong
going through it all
singing the same dang song
everything's not perfect
and far from alright
yet I play the flute
giving off a sweet sound
when inside i'm off key
standing in a room
instead of on stage
and yet everyone still
sees me

---------
with a 1 and a 2
i'll write a song for you
and tell you that
i wish to be there
by your side in the dark
where there's quiet and
love in the silence
and our love can start
with the panting and breathing
of all that is ours
and we can lie outside where we
can both watch the stars
------------
there's a girl on my mind
and she's not here
as in, not in the room
or of this earth
but i will settle for the one
who also settles for me
and then that common ground
is where our love will grow
like glowing green
blades of grass
--------
i wait for that final day
where who i tell will understand
and take my hand, because
they feel the same

and there're days i wish
not to try and just give up
there's not enough to offer
the one i ever find
---------

Hey guys... Yep... I felt inspired to write more. Have a great day.
-----------
I wish I could go,
Where dreams come true
On a daily basis,
or when you need them
Because life's not havin' it...
And I crawl into bed
I pray to God
Who listens to my every cry
I know He'll help me
Yet I feel abandoned
And left to figure it all out
Down here on my own..
------------
I feel there are days, where
Love doesn't matter,
For in all my experience
All I've ever loved, has
Not been a waste,
but sent out to sea

And never returned,
simply left to be a cast away..
-----------
Life as a teen's
Not great for me
Seems one day's good
Next, screwed as can be
Though I keep my head up
It's hard to stay strong
When next problem strikes
and you feel life's so wrong
------------

----------
Oh, I can stand up for you,
But would you for me,
Because the thought you wouldn't
So hurts me
And it's a reason I lie
Upon my back,
Wondering why I feel this way..

You're a reason to count
The stars at night
A reason to wonder if
My life's right,
And if I will share
a spot with you
Beside the angels in Heaven

Can you say that
I mean the world to you,
Cause you
mean the world to me,
And I hope that you
Will turn to me
Should you feel lost
And Abandoned
Cause I believe,
yes, I believe
That they are so wrong...
--------

is it wrong that i will take tons of pain for someone and still look at it as I want to help them so much that it's all worth it?
  If someone means something to you, I feel you can not give up.
Someone's struggling, just saying you're there i don't think is enough
And I don't like people denying help, when those that care come of the woodwork.  They come out and they try and save you from defeating yourself. 
I've seen so many people try time and time again to fix their own problems, including me, and have nothing to show for it.
I don't like how people change.. I know it happens, but i don't have to like it. 
Also it hurts most when someone once says that you're one reason that they stop doing something, then change into someone that seems like they don't want your caring...
why do people do this!?  i just wanna know.. really.. i just want to... then i'll be satisfied...

oh, how i dread the fading light,
but welcome darkness
with open arms... for I know soon.
i'll be dreaming of you...

You in all your sweetness..
running through my veins...
Has waken me inside...
But I'll lie still forever...

Because you leave me that way..
At peace, with everything.....
Even this world that separates..
The two of us..

Sleep tight, sweet angel.

------------
Anything at all I'd say,
To you
Why'd you have to go away?
Hug this pillow oh so tight,
Wishing not for day,
Or light..
Leave me alone and crooked..

I'm wishing all the more,
For dreams,
Standing here at my door...
Dreaming of you every night
Wishing not for day,
Or light
Can I say,"I still miss you..."?

Making my way to the front of the fuss,
There's no excuse to be scared to bust..
Cause we don't know... No we don't know..
What we're fighting for..
But I fight for you, like and untamed beast
Emotions let run, and on you they feast..
Hold me close now.... Hold me close now..
Can't live without you, anymore
--------------------

Oh my gosh this is a cause for celebration!  Just kidding... Hm.... not much to say.. I've been playing an awesome video game called "Prince of Persia: Warrior Within", and it is awesome!  well anyway.. here's more writing... this will show off my crazy bad white boy rapping skillz!
--------------------
Yo listen up, that's right
I got sumtin' to say,
I've been lost an' confused,
But now see my way

It's clear as any-ting
Danglin' free befour my face,
It's way off from
Between a rock an' a hard place...

It's an open ocean,
A free sea waitin' for me,
Tell you what,
Can't wait til' I leave

Lead me on Lord,
Through shroud and plain sight,
Stan' close to you Lord,
And for you will I fight.
----------------

Don't think anyone reads this... but oh well.
------
No one may ever know,
May ever see just what lies,
Within my soul,
And deep behind my pale blue eyes.

Tonight I felt alone,
Surrounded by many in a place,
Of celestial warmth...
Crowded by many a joyous face..

Don't feel up to life,
If this is the best I come with,
On Friday night,
When friends wanna have a good time..
-------------

SONG QUOTE FOR THE DAY:
"I'm quite aware we're dying.. And your hands, they shake with good-byes.."

----
Organize just what you said,
And make yourself wish you were dead..
Then call me a fool a-gain...

Pet your stupid teddy bear,
I'll tell you now how much I don't care..
Go eat your Lucky Charms a-lone..
------------

I'll ask from you,
From you to me,
To take a minute,
For you to stop and think,
Of all I've done for you,
Yes, think of all I've shared,
Was it all for love,
Or was it all declared
To be nothing for you,
but something to me..
Was it all made up,
Was it just make believe...

Was it a vision I saw,
Just a dream in my head,
Was It words I heard,
Or just the words I said..

Oh I wish all was clear,
So I could sleep sound again,
But when you find the answer,
Please come and find me then..

For only then do I believe,
That I'll be happy...

SONG QUOTE FOR DAY:
"And I don't think that you know what you've been missing"
-----------------
MORE FREE WRITING
The story's not what all you see,
But also what lives deep inside of me..
Viewed through the visions of dreams,
What you take and toss as if make believe..
Discarded and so I hurt,
Ignored as if the specs of dirt,
On which you walk, throughout your life,
When I really just want to be your light
When you walk along this time span,
at times, seeming without a hand,
And you've been wandering all alone,
When life shouldn't be challenged on your own.
----------------

SONG QUOTE FOR DAY:
"You always find the words to say.. to keep me right here waiting.."
--------------

FREE WRITE!

Oh, I feel this isn't ending...
And I feel so condescending...
Like I've fallen in place,
To the lowest point on earth,
Just to sit here waiting alone...

God, say that all this is not vain...
There's a reason for all this pain...
To suffer is what makes,
Proofing of all that I'm worth,
Sitting here to wait on my own...

I feel it will remain this way...
From now, until my ending day...
To suffer's what it takes,
Hiding my hearts sick berth...
Til no longer here, left unshown..
------------

Hit that Beat!

 

oh hand grenade, of blood and love,
my heart's just lost its pin...
the angel figure's lying in wait,
my heart is ready to try again...

though once, caught seeking and once shot down
I've feared to face my past..
But with a test of faith, a leap at that,
My fears, they cannot last..

oh hand grenade, please explode with joy,
for i'm tired of tears and pain...
my heart has grown strong, once more..
Let all doubts within be slain..

"Deranged"

let's freeze the frame,
and let me lose my mind,
this is a grand situation,
we're doing, one more time..
and everyone knows,
that my mind never changed
that i'm a little bit of mindless,
and a bit of deranged...
cause i won't let go of you,
no never, no
you're the best girl of my time...
you're a friend that's true,
yes only you..
to lose you'd be such a crime...
so i'm at it again,
all the games that i play,
let me clue you in,
that they won't go away...
cause everyone knows,
life is boring to start,
and it makes it even worse,
when you don't have a heart.
no i won't let go of you
no never, no
you're the best girl of my time...
you're a friend that's true,
yes only you..
to lose you'd be such a crime...

Here's something I wrote guys.. Tell me what you think..

-------------------------
'Jimmy Bellan'

Here goes the story,
Watch close as it unfolds...
A road off in the distance,
And where it goes, well nobody knows..
New discovery, or new existence,
Well, it's been waitin' there all along...
Been waitin' a long time, and it's come...
Its moment's come, and gone..

Jimmy Bellan's gone gun-ho,
Blowin' holes
In old six-four - (Yeah)
Jimmy Bellan's gone gun-ho
Blowin' holes
In old six-four

Well, Left here on a long trip,
Been gone a very long time..
Quite sure, I'm not the same...
But nothing is wrong inside...
See my homefront in the distance,
It's really sparklin' in my eyes...
I feel a thought brewin' my mind...
Let's burn this town of mine..

Jimmy Bellan's gone gun-ho,
Blowin' holes
In a quarter-inch skull - (Yeah)
Jimmy Bellan's gone gun-ho
Blowin' holes
In a quarter-inch skull

My brain's fried from bloodshed,
What's done, it don't feel wrong...
I feel like I'm the only one,
But I've felt like this way all along..
"What home to come back to?!
Son, don't you see what you have done?"
I look up, I say, Officer.....
I know I had some fun..

Jimmy Bellan's gone gun-ho
Kid went crazy
When he came back home
Jimmy Bellan's gone gun-ho
Kid went crazy
When he came back home

Jimmy Bellan's gone gun-ho
Jimmy Bellan's gone gun-ho
Jimmy Bellan has gone gun-ho
Kid's gone crazy
And he shouldna come home......
--------------

"Ruby Soho"

Echoes of reggae comin' through my bedroom wall
havin' a party up next door but i'm sittin here all alone
two lovers in the bedroom and the other starts to shout
all i got is this blank stare and that don't carry no clout at all

[Chorus]
Destination unknown
Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho
[x2]

He's singin and she's there to lend a hand
he's seen his name on the marquee but she will never understand
once again he's leavin' and she's there with a tear in her eye
embraces with a warm gesture it's time, time to say goodbye

[Chorus]

Ruby's heart ain't beatin cause she knows the feelin' is gone
she's not the only one who knew there's somethin' wrong
her lover's in the distance as she wipes a tear from her eye
ruby's fading out, she disappears, it's time, time to say goodbye

[Chorus]

Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho
Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho
Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho
Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho

Destination unknown (Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho)
Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho
[x2]

-------------------
A measure of silence,
Signature to go insane,
Pick up the guitar,
Wail it, release some pain..

Lead your fans forth,
On a venture deep inside,
Show em' all how hard you rock,
And really blow their mind..

Stage left, stage right,
Your followers all around,
Turn it up - Make it loud,
Your feet leave the ground..

Strike your favorite power chord,
And lead them all away..
On journey through your rocking world,
..................The one you hide all day...............
--------------------------

photo from oosnake45
Black and white,
A place all my own...
One spot pale, the other
My place, my home...

Oh if you could see my lonely sanctuary,
Would you ever want to visit?
What lonliness lies in my wilderness,
Maybe Only I will ever know...

All I know,
The visions never cease...