whoa...

November 12, 2006so i haven't touched this stupid thing in like... two months.
maybe i'll go check out the whole 'myspace scene.'
maybe i'm not that bored.

sigh.

September 20, 2006is there a hole in your heart
or am i mistaken?
i can see your capillary veins.

you be the patient, i'll be the surgeon -
just like 1st grade on the playground.

(i am a pirate, you are a princess - playradioplay!)

'Face Down' Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

August 28, 2006

Hey girl you know you drive me crazy
one look puts the rhythm in my hand.
Still I'll never understand why you hang around
I see what's going down.

Cover up with make up in the mirror
tell yourself it's never gonna happen again
you cry alone and then he swears he loves you.

Do you feel like a man
when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.

A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect
every action in this world will bear a consequence
If you wade around forever you will surely drown
I see what's going down.

I see the way you go and say your right again,
say your right again
heed my lecture

Do you feel like a man
when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down a new life she has.

One day she will tell you that she has had enough
its coming round again.

Do you feel like a man, when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the grown?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has.

Face down in the dirt she says, this doesn't hurt she says I finally had enough..

So, you know those days, when you wake up and...

August 09, 2006You realize you're completely and utterly lost?

During the daytime it isn't so bad, because I have friends to harrass and I keep my thoughts about everything bad in check.

... But when it's just myself, I find my thoughts straying to places I never want to go back to.

You know those moods?

July 21, 2006I'm in a bad funk. I'm not really liking anybody at the moment, and I seem to be pissed at everyone, including myself. It's like I'm carrying this huge load from point A to point B, and I'm stuck somewhere next to point Z.

My nerves are shot and I just feel twitchy. Not the good sugar-twitch or happy-twitch, but ohmygodwhat'swrongwithme-twitch.

Maybe it comes with my cold, because I've only been feeling like this since I've gotten my cold, but then, that doesn't make much sense.

But like, it seems that I've got this cold and I feel clausterphobic, like my lungs are two sizes too small - and it feels like it's translating over into other aspects of my life. Like, everything is two sizes too small and I can't find somewhere I can just fit. Not like socially, because I know where I fit there mostly, but like my life as a whole.

Where do I fit? What am I supposed to be doing with myself? Why do I feel the need to question myself?

I guess this is the cliche'd topic everyone goes through, but if it is, why does it have to hurt so much?