so i opened up the paper this morning to see that there is a controversy over the name of a building at mtsu.

the building's name?

forrest hall.

as in nathan bedford forrest. you know, that dirty racist that founded the kkk?

please disregard the fact that the kkk was originally a confederate veteran's organization.

please disregard that when the organization's purpose began to turn towards racist activity, forrest publicly denounced and ordered the group to disband.

please disregard that he was a tactical genius and a local hero who saved the city of murfreesboro in a daring raid.

his name clearly doesn't belong on a military science building.

clearly.

and why stop there?

george washington owned slaves. he's clearly burning in hell right now. let's kick him out of history. i can see it now.

teacher: "and the second president of the united states was john adams."

2nd grader: "who was the first?"

teacher: "it doesn't matter, timmy, he's in hell."

goodbye washington, jefferson, monroe, madison.

goodbye andrew jackson. you should have been nicer to the indians.

excuse me, the native americans.

stonewall jackson, argued by many to be the greatest military genius in history (ranked in the top three with napoleon and alexander the great), never owned slaves. he taught sunday school for the local slaves and taught them how to read and write.

oh, but he faught for the confederacy. kinda like general lee, who freed several hundred slaves upon inheriting them.

they're obviously in hell, too.

goodbye lee, jackson, and forrest.

and all the presidents that subjugated natives in the west and harrassed the south american nations? they should leave, too.

goodbye, teddy roosevelt.

speaking of roosevelts, f.d.r. had all the japanese put into camps. we'll forget he existed, too.

because it makes sense that, when your history offends someone, you should forget it happened.

i mean, really.

you can't respect the past AND people's feelings. duh.

oh, but remember sh*rman? you know, the guy that burned an atlanta full of civilians to the ground? who destroyed train tracks, burned bridges, hanged slaves, and raped women across georgia?

yeah, him?

he can stay. he can even have a shiny statue of himself put up in central park.

dirty racists.