it is very interesting when you realize that you're no longer a little kid anymore so you need to quit acting and thinking like one.  it is completely real that in life there are limitations.  sure, when kids are little you should tell them that they can be anything they want as long as they try real hard.  but the honest truth is that some people are not made to do the glamorous jobs in life.  as a high schooler you always hear that one day you are going to have to make it in the "real world" and you always think that you can handle it, but honestly the real world is tough. no longer are you surrounded by people who care about you.  it is a very strange feeling the first time you realize that your teachers could not care less about your grade in their class, they don't care that you graduated magna cum laude, or that you're on a presidential scholarship, they care that your butt is in the seat with tuition paid so they can get a pay check once a month.  of course not all professors will be this way, but it is strange.

it is also strange when you realize how selfish you were as a "child."  a couple of posts ago i asked people what i should do with my scholarship refund, a motorcycle or a lift kit for my jeep.  how incredible selfish and immature of me!  why should God bless me with anything if my concern is going to be how i can satisfy my own desires?  there are so many people whom i could help with that money, and all i was worried about was which toy to spend it on. 

interesting feeling to be disgusted with yourself...

ral