So today was my first day... and it was really easy... but hey it's money.... I am working every day this week so we'll see how it goes. I apologize to Chris and Becca who stopped by to see me... thank you very much, it was nice to see you... but at the moment I couldn't talk even though I didn't have much to do... anyway I appreciated you two coming in :-)... Y'all are great :-)... I'll be there from 10-5 all week so you can stop in and see me. Have a great week everyone.

    So I am supposed to dress up as a pirate... actually a guy pirate... interesting... actually it's kinda fun trying to find stuff to do... it's like the opposite of what I usually try to do... I'm trying to find ways to make it look like have thicker eyebrows (usually I thin them out) make it look like I don't have as much of a waist (usually I try to make this look smaller not larger trying to figure out how to give myself facial hair (yea not a normal occurance).... basically tring to make myself look dumb... I mean ::ahem::.... masculine.... yea so it should be interesting

I'm really trying not to... I have an Exam in Theater!!! and I have my papers due tomorrow!!! Which (I'm trying really hard) I think I'm not going to write the extra credit essay... and no I'm not just  saying it this time... I really don't think I'm going to... really... I mean it... I have to much to do...

    So for my short sermon I stumbled a little but for the most part was able to say what I had written. I changed some things while I was up there, added a scripture that wasn't in my notes... The thing is when I practice by myself I could say the whole thing without flaw... and the minute it's with others my voice fails... I hate that... Anyway I did it in 4:20. This is much improved from my original time... Thank you to everyone who supported me!

    Human video... the first thing I'm supposed to be laying down on the edge of three chairs... the chairs that they provided were extremely slick, and they slanted steeply back. As I tried ot position myself I kept sliding so that I had to hold myself in postion. As I am doing this they are getting ready to start the music and I am thinking "this is really bad!" So the music starts and I am supposed to sit up. The problem is that I usually sit up to where I am sitting half and half on two of the chairs, but as I did this, those two chairs began sliding apart so I was sitting up with nothing under me! AHH.... so I grab the chairs trying to correct myself while staying with my character... apparantly I made it... later chris said "Nice catch!!" what a relief!.... I missed one cue, but was told that I did the mask pulls ok. That is harder than it looks... pulling a mask off, changing your facial expressions at the moment your hand comes over your face... hmmm....
Special thanks to Marcus!!! He helped soooo much!!
There are still some things that I think should have advanced which didn't.... I think our group performed great even if the judges didn't advance some things.
I now get to go write as much as I can in my about 25 some odd pages that need to be done :-p
y'all have a great day

             I advanced in both my human video solo and my short sermon.... God is great, because there is no way I should have been able to pull those off. He has blessed me in the people who supprt me, believe in me, and help me.

    Oh the irony...so I've gone through my short sermon a couple of times and then decided to time it. 5 minutes and 40 seconds!!!!!! NOOOOO!!...So I took out all the extraneous parts and was left with...5 mintues and 6 seconds. Deja vu. NOOOO!!!! I'm just so long winded it's not fair. They should make an exception for me. Why me? Why me? I don't mean to, it's just the way I do it. NOOOOOOOO!!! ::sighs:: I guess I should go try to cut out some more. Wish me luck. See you all tonight. 

        Nothing like waiting until the last minute... I wrote my short sermon last night... you know, decided to get it done early, since competition is tonight I figured there was no sense putting it off until today and stuff... yeesh... I had been telling myself that I wasn't going to do it so I didn't feel guilty about not having it written (but someone said I should... and I could tell my dad wanted me to.) So yea... hope all goes well tonight.. I'd like to be able to do my human video today and my short sermon tomorrow, but we'll se. (my luck my short sermon will be the first entry.)

    Good luck to all who are competing.

I am sooooo NOT ready for tonight!!!!

I have to preform my solo tonight... ick... before that I have to bake for the fund-raiser and possibly do service hours (and practice my human video)...

Isn't she a beautiful girl? She is a wonderful friend as well... I have good friends :-)

    Oh and dads and little brothers who clean your room to surprise you are INCREDIBLE!!!!

    ::sigh:: how nice to walk in at night (not in the best of moods) to find that your room is completely clean and even vacumed!!


(Bethy worked on folding clothes in attempt to help my room the other day as well)

FAMILY ROCKS

(even family + additional kinda family who you get in water fights with)

Unfortunate news; I have a whole lot of homework to do;
                                 A research paper due
                                 An Exam in theater
                                 A health presentation
                                 Possibly another long history essay
                              My fine arts stuff isn't ready
                                  I have a solo human video and a short sermon that aren't near ready (just really started actually)

Great news; Right now a lot of things have turned out well;
                              The english paper that I worked on all easter got an A (note this english teacher does not give A's believe me this was my final full out attempt before declaring him completely unpleasable, I did everything he has mentioned that I could do better on previous papers)
                                The History essay that I was so worriedd about with the book that I lost, that I pulled another all-nighter for got a 95 (this was really hard as well)
                                 The history notebook that I put so much trouble into and spent hours at the library for plus an all-nighter got 15/15 (which counts for 30% of my grade)
                                  And I have GREAT friends!!
                                  And I have an awsome dad
(note that the good is longer than the bad)

... and not stop...

i want school to be out. this week has been Pretty much full of just everythIng. Nothing seems to want to just stay calm. nothinG will just stay even... life is full of ups and downs... but there is one who stays the same.. that helps.

I posted a few random photos that I have taken... I'll post more later but I couldn't get the others to load just now...

    yea so school... ick... I have seven pages written so far... I have a lot more reading and a lot more writing to do... I dont' think that I will go to bed tonight... I haven't pulled an all nighter in a while, which is good... but I really don't feel in the mood to do that.. oh well I guess that's life huh? We don't always get what we want ;-).... yuck... I really am not in a good state of mind to be writing a paper like this :-p.... wish me luck.

I haev realized that...

       I have the absolute bestest daddy in the entire universe...

       I have amazing friends...

       I have a TON of homework to do in these next few weeks and I am going to have NO life for that period...

       It is starting to feel like summer and I really really need to start working out again...

       Even if slowly, I am gettign somewhere...

       I have things pertty good :-)

Enough randomness... I have to go wrok on my paper :-p

    I wish things didn't take so much time...

Another thing... weird how when you keep track of how many times something happens, you find out it is more than you would have thought at all... Thinking back you would have said 3 a week... but then marking every time you come up with like 7 or something...

"A friend is someone who sees through you and still enjoys the view."
~ Wilma Askinas ~

"A friend knows the song of my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails."
~ Author Unknown ~

"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked."
~ Bernard Meltzer ~

"Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."
~ Author Unknown ~

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget."
~ G. Randolf ~

"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."
~ Walter Winchell ~

"True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost"
~ Charles Caleb Colton ~

"Friendship is a sheltering tree."
~ S. Taylor-Coleridge ~

"Friendship makes prosperity more brilliant, and lightens adversity by dividing and sharing it."
~ Cicero (44 B.C.) ~

"The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him."
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

"The best kind of friend is the one you could sit on a porch swing with, never saying a word, and then walk away feeling like that was the best conversation you've ever had."
~ Unknown ~

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that gives value to survival."
~ C.S. Lewis ~

"We cannot tell the precise moment when friendship is formed. As in filling a vessel drop by drop, there is a last drop that makes it run over; so in series of kindnesses, there is a last one that makes the heart run over."
~ James Boswell ~

"The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him."
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

"What is a friend? I will tell you. It is a person with whom you dare to be yourself. Your soul can be naked with him. He seems to ask of you to put on nothing, only to be what you are. He does not want you to be better or worse. When you are with him, you feel as a prisoner feels who has been declared innocent. You do not have to be on your guard. You can say what you think, so long as it is genuinely you. He understands those contradictions in your nature that lead others to misjudge you. With him you breathe freely. You can avow your little vanities and envies and hates and vicious sparks, your meannesses and absurdities and, in opening them up to him, they are lost, dissolved on the white ocean of his loyality. He understands. You do not have to be careful. You can abuse him, neglect him, tolerate him. Best of all, you can keep still with him. It makes no matter. He likes you. He is like fire that purges to the bone. He understands. You can weep with him, sin with him, laugh with him, pray with him. Through it all - and underneath - he sees, knows and loves you.
A friend? What is a friend?
Just one, I repeat, with whom you dare to be yourself."
~ C. Raymond Beran ~

I want to just feel like this.

You know, the fun, confident, carefree person who always gets it right and is always upbeat.

Do people see the problems as who I am?
I want the smile to be permanant. Or at least predominate...

Happy
...Fear stuck its foot out and I tripped on the same lie

That voice screaming into my head

Pushing me to play dead

Saying "don't you even try"

But how can I claime to be free

When I carry more chains the world when they see me?

I don't wanna be the fool who stays

Down, down, down, down down


I should be happy

I should be happy

I should be living up these days

Just like I know who runs this place

Now that you found me

I should be happy


Now I'm not talking 'bout a smile so fake

While the world takes pictures 24/7

I just want my faith to be a little more real

What you see is what you get

What you see is how I feel


I should be happy...
you get the picture.... Happy....

The lightning is beautiful tonight.


Romans 1:20  For since the
creation of the world God's invisible qualities--his eternal power and
divine nature--have been clearly seen, being understood from what has
been made, so that men are without excuse.


Peace comes from knowing and trusting in God....

John
14:27  Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to
you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not
be afraid.


Colossians 3:15  Let the peace of Christ rule in your
hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be
thankful.

16  Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you
teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms,
hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God...

Alright I'm doing it again...

Casting crowns
 "Set Me Free"


It hasn't always been this way

I remember brighter days

Before the dark ones came

Stole my mind

Wrapped my soul in chains


Now I live among the dead

Fighting voices in my head

Hoping someone hears me crying in the night

And carries me away


Set me free of the chains holding me

Is anybody out there hearing me?

Set me free


Morning breaks another day

Finds me crying in the rain

All alone with my demons I am

Who is this man that comes my way?

The dark ones shriek

They scream His name

Is this the One they say will set the captives free?

Jesus, rescue me


As the God man passes by

He looks straight through my eyes

And darkness cannot hide


Do you want to be free?

Lift your chains

I hold the key

All power on Heav'n and Earth belong to me


You are free

You are free

You are free