bored out of my mind.

February 09 2008

1.What are 3 emotions you are feeling right now?




2. What time did you wake up this morning?
5 I thought I had school today.

3. How many hours of sleep did you get?
9 hours

4. What are you currently doing?
This survey, having a headache

5. Have you kissed someone within the past week?

6.Have you told anyone you loved them today?

7. Have you ever been in love?
Yes... But time changes.

8. Do you like anybody?

9. Do you miss anybody?

10. Do you have plans for tomorrow?
nope, I don't think

11. What is the last thing you ate?

12. Is there a member of the opposite sex in your life who means the world to you?

sure, but doesn't feel the same about me "/ as usual.

13. What are you listening to right now?

14. Are you a generally clean or messy person?

15.Have you kissed 3 people on your top ?
No, their all chicks? weird

16.Have you ever liked anyone on your top ?
not the current top no?

17. Would you currently start a thing with your top ?



18. Do you Love your ex?


19. Do you find members of the opposite sex confusing?
oh yea

20. What was the reason behind the last time you cried?
the notebook

21. Is there anybody you wish you could be with right now?

22. Are you going to be alone tonight?

23. When is the last time you saw a movie in theaters?
About a month ago I think?

26. Is there something you wish you could tell someone, but can’t?

27. What're you doing tonight?


28. What is one thing you can't wait for?

29. How has the week been?
a roller coaster, boys are stupid.

(not all of them but a large portion)

30. Do you have a best friend?

I quit this

February 08 2008

I'm done.

I quit loving.

I quit hating.

I quit missing.

I quir hoping.

(^ I quit hoping)

I quit life.



This is gone on far enough.

If you can't man up; don't do anything that has

to do with me.


If you're going to be a panzee


Right now I have so much negative

energy flowing from me right now.

I'd appreciate if EVERYONE left

me alone for the next 3 days.

atleast until I'm just chill again.

(for you)

February 07 2008

"If you're a Bird, I'm a Bird" -My next tatoo ^-^

I can't wait for it.

I'm doing because it's love.


That movie gives me hope?

Sounds weird but even after all that time you know?

Maybe I'm stupid for thinking this but maybe I'll be

fortunate enough to be with someone who will always love me.


It's funny how he found her with another guy

after she knew she didn't love that other guy?

And he told his girlfriend that if she ever came back

he was going to be with her.



But being alone isn't so bad,

I'm really not alone?

I get love.

Just not the kind I want you know?

I know I'm Queer.


It's contagous.


If Love was a battlefeild, then that would explain why we always get hurt, why we always lose?

kast thought

February 05 2008

Course of Nature

"Caught in the Sun"

Listen and learn how I feel.



Soulmate (last thought)

January 11 2008

Incompatible, it don't matter though
'cos someone's bound to hear my cry
Speak out if you do
You're not easy to find

Is it possible Mr. Loveable
Is already in my life?
Right in front of me
Or maybe you're in disguise

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone

Here we are again, circles never end
How do I find the perfect fit
There's enough for everyone
But I'm still waiting in line

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone

If there's a soulmate for everyone

Most relationships seem so transitory
They're all good but not the permanent one

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone

Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
If there's a soulmate for everyone


January 11 2008

so yea man, how's life?

I figure I'd say hi while I was on here,

and tell you guys that I think you're amazing.

I miss all of you,

so I haven't been around much.

I'm finding myself a job,

because I've been talking to this social worker about emancipation.

It's really not that Big of a deal, I'm working super hard in school, and I'm selling a bunch of my stuff.

I seriously am Happy.


Oh and I was up at like 3 o' clock last night and I heard a song by natasha beingfeild called soulmate and check it:

"Someone Longs for someone to hold,

who KNows how to love you

without being told

Somebody tell me why I'm on my own

If theres a soulmate

for everyone?"



I'm so glad I'm Independent.

June 12 I should be in Mexico,

But in Febuary I'll be in Indiana for Three Days

May I'll be in Florida for Srping Break.

I'm Livin the Good Life.

photo from


January 04 2008

1. last cigarette?
around 4?

2. last beverage:
sweet tea

3. last phone call:

4. last text message:

6: last BUBBLE bath:
ha ha ha ha Like when I was 8

7: last time you cried :
Last night I'm sure

SEVEN have you's:

1. have you ever dated someone twice?:

2. have you ever been cheated on?:

3. have you ever kissed someone & regreted it?:
Yea but it was against my will

4. have you ever said I Love You?
ehhh yea

5. have you ever lost someone?:

6. have you ever been drunk and threw up?
ha ha ha Yes.

SIX things you did in the past three days:

1. talked on the phone 

2. Went over peoples houses?
3. spent the night at someones house
4. went to a party
5. went to another party
6. went to another party..

list FOUR people you can tell pretty much anything to --
1. Carmel
2. myself
3. myself
4. and Curt. although?

list THREE favorite colors ---
1. yellow
2. blue
3. green

This month have you...

Laughed until you cried:

Went behind your parents back:

Found out who your true friends were:

2. Gay Marriage?:
go for it?

3. Lowering the drinking age?
it doesn't matter? 

4. Straight, Gay, Bi ?
Straight. not bi. Like sooome people. -lol-

5. Who are the best huggers that you know?

6. Do you believe in love at first sight?

7. Is there something you want to tell someone?
yes... GoD why am I such a panzee?

10. did you know 9 is gone?
and number 8

11. How many kids do you want to have?

13. Do you wanna change your name?:
nah I'm good.

14. Last time you saw your father?

about 6 months ago.

15.What time did you wake up today?:

16. What were you doing at midnight last night?


17. Name something you CANNOT wait to do:
tell somone something and say "there are you happy that I need you? huh? well....."

so check it...

January 04 2008

my mood is melonchaly...

I think this whole new year new me thing isn't really what I wanted.

I want the old me back.

Ecxept for the whole dating part.

I'm happy with being single,

since I'm traveling alot more I'll meet new people,

and as long as that persons happy.... naaaaw. just kidding.


But anyway.





December 31 2007
I love life.Sheya. 

Alright.. well?

December 18 2007

So I can't take this,

Like I mean you. It's complicated?

Everytime I see your picture my heart hurts.

The worst case of missing you ever.

Like, In my stomach theres a pain.

And then I feel like crying.

You know for a fact I still love you.

So much that it's killing me.


I don't know how to get rid of you,

I know it's not hard to love a free spirit.

But when two free spirits love,

it gets sorta messy.

But when you Love and the other one doesn't,

it sucks.









I think About it all

December 11 2007

In my Creative writting class I wrote this, I had nothing else to write about:


"I think about the promises you made me.

All of them were broken."

We were only to write 2 sentences about whatever and everyone had to guess what your work was going to be about and here were everyones guesses:








This was a poem about broken promises duh.

About the after when you hurt?

So then I wrote about 7 pages and it wasn't really good writting but I wrote in about 20 minutes. And it was called "I think about it all" And my Teachers so cute and she goes

"I said write a poem not a book"


But I just reall thought about it and wanted to let you guys know I worte it.

Coldplay- Yellow

I dedicate to Carmel

: )

If this is it?

December 06 2007

So I've been thinking? Are Second Chances really...... worth it? I mean come on now? What's the point? Not saying it's unnessasary? I'm not saying that I'm in that situation? But my Friends been trying to get back with her boyfrind and he's all like "Second Chances they don't matter, people never change?" And I totaly agree with him. I mean if they hurt you once, they do it again? It's Just life. But whatever?


I got one of my phones back? But it's my house phone?

Which is wicked awesome! But I want my cell phone.

Anywho. LAST night I just thought about how things use to be, then I started to like wheep. And I'm so thankful things are different. I don't really know how to explain it but there you go.



(I love this song "Until The End of Time." It's Fantastic.)

Well I seem to be confused

November 24 2007

Last night I went and saw Fred Claus.

Good Movie.

But I really had to much stuff on my mind to

Enjoy it.

I felt like I was in a paraelle unviverse.

(can't spell)

It was a movie you don't take little kids to.

But I might go see Dan in Real Life.

maybe that'll cheer me up?

I've been debating on calling this person?

Like I want to, but then again I'm

lost for words?

But enough of that!

I'm gonna go back to sleep.




November 23 2007

Howdy Friends,

happy shopping day : )

hopefully you guys have a good

Holiday Season?

Okay so I don't have a way with words..

-lol- aNyWhO!

Last night I played Rock Band with

my b.f. Amy and it was so much fun.

Then I tried to dance, and that was

just plain silly!


ily guys.

See some of you soon!




November 22 2007

1. What is in the back seat of your car right now?
car seats?

2. When was the last time you threw up?
like yesterday?

3. What's your favorite curse word?
uhm no favorites

4. Name 3 people who made you smile today?
Caleb, Patricia, my Aunt

5. What were you doing at 8AM this morning?

6. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
my hair

8. Have you ever been to a strip club?
uhm no.

9. What is the last thing you said out loud?
"tird nugget!" -lol-

10. What is the best ice cream flavor?

11. What was the last thing you had to drink?
the best Sweet Tea in the whole galaxy

12. What are you wearing right now?
clothes? skin?

13. What was the last thing you ate?

14. Have you bought any new clothing items this week?

15. When was the last time you ran?
like two days ago?

16. What's the last sporting event you watched?
todays football game! go green bay! ^_^

18. Who is the last person you sent a comment/message on myspace?

19. Ever go camping?

24. Do you drink your soda from a straw?
yes when there's ice in it, I hate ice

25. What did your last text message say?
can't say.. ha ha ha!

26. Are you someone's best friend?
i would hope

27. What are you doing tomorrow?
going to see a movie, uhm shopping

28. Where is your mom right now?

29. Look to your left, what do you see?
a chair

30. What color is your watch?
i dont have one

31. What do you think of when you think of Australia?
a get away

32. Ever ridden on a roller coaster?
my yes

33. What is your birthstone?

34. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive through?

35. What is your favorite number?

36. Do you have a dog?

37. who was the last person that you talked to on the phone?

38. Have you met anyone famous?

39. Any plans today?
going down to nashville tonight, gonna hit the mall in a while

40. How many states have you lived in?
idk? a few.

41. Ever go to college?
no, not yet. But the Navy calls for me

42. Where are you right now?
in the study?

43. Biggest annoyance in your life right now?
uhm I would have to say..... well I can't think of anything at the moment.
Just a little frustrated.

44. Last song listened to?
More than a Memory

46. Are you allergic to anything?

47. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?
I wear a different pair of shoes everyday.

49. Are you jealous of anyone?
uh... no

50. Is anyone jealous of you?
not that I would know of? I'm sure not.

51. Do you love anyone?

52. Do any of your friends have children?

53. Do you eat healthy?
ha ha ha! no.

54. What do you usually do during the day?
stress, space out, work?

55. Do you hate anyone right now?
it's a mix emotion really, hate what someones done. But not the person

56. Do you use the word 'hello' daily?
uhm yes?

58. How old will you be turning on your next birthday?

59. Have you ever been to Six Flags?

60. How did you get one of your scars?
a beast, a chick? alot of things?

(my last thought for a while)

November 21 2007

More than a memory.

I heard this song and I just wept.

This is like my life.

In a song version...

But I'm over alot of things and I'm gonna start these classes at school, there to help me with alot of stuff.

And I need 'em write now.

I love you guys.


*Like Water it'll All wash Away*


To Austin & Tyler Lowery (2)

November 19 2007

Okay I'm really bad at writting individual messages,

but I figured I would let you two know, that I adore you both.

You guys were there for me when alot of you other people weren't. And even though you both haven't had hardly any coontact with me since I've been sick, you still stick up for me.

Even though I shoved your face in carpet, and tackled you various numbers of times. (Tyler L.)

And Austin, even when I went through all your stuff and wore your clothes and made fun of you this summer (lol just kidding hun)


And even though you made fun of me tonight for my voice being broked.


I still adore you both...

And Tyler L send me a message telling me when your coming in, I keep forgeting?

to Austin Mathis & Tyler Lowery

November 16 2007

ha ha ha this is something you both would do, so this is for you:

1) When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.

2) Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

3) Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

4) Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.

5) Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"

6) Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

7) Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.

8) Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.

9) Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.

10) Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.

11) Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

12) Ask, "Did you feel that?"

13) Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.

14) When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"

15) Swat at flies that don't exist.

16) When someone gets on scream and jump like they are the main act at a concert

17) Call out, "Group Hug!” and then enforce it.

18) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!

19) Open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"

20) Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

21) Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.

22) Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.

23) Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.

24) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

25) Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".

26) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space"


Ha ha ha ha! Told you : )

New Song Favorites

November 07 2007

I've decided to put on my favorites bands/singers songs on here so you know what my next play list will be:


1. Greatful Dead- Attic of my Life

2. Johnny Cash- Cocaine Blues

3. Brighteyes- Landlocked Blues

4. Secondhand Serenade- Vulnerable

5. Beatles- When I'm 64

6. Jack Johnson- Do you Remember

7. Blind Melon- No Rain

8. Tripping Daisy- Lost and Found

9. A Fine Frenzy- Almost Lover

10. Stain- It's been A while

11. Seether- (feat. Amy Lee) Broken

12. Bob Dylan- The times are All Changin

13. Elvis- Jailhouse Rock

14. Colbie Calait- Bubbly

15. Amy Winehouse- You Know that I'm No Good.


Yay! Love these songs. they rock!

You'll like them too. 

Almost Love

November 04 2007

This song is so amazing.

I had to put it on here.


"I should've known you'd bring me heartache, almost Lovers always do."


It's amazing.

the first time I smiled in 3 days

November 04 2007
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at PhotobucketThis made me smile so much.

Try Hard not to Laugh

October 19 2007
Okay today I approached a man at our school who had a booth, a "service" booth. I asked him how his day was and we got ti talking, and he was telling me about his Life in the NAVY.  And we talked about the benefits for college, and about how you can build a type of courage and strength. So I've figured I should join the NAVY. So I'm thinking about it, and it would fit into my future, that and I have alot of plans that this could benifit from. So I'm a bit exicted. Alright then. That's what I figured you should know, and I can start training at 16. Which will be my Senior year. Yay! : )

The Guitar

September 28 2007

I'm really learning.

My Uncle Buddy tought me alot

on the guitar last night.

I was so happy.

And I'm leaving tonight for my Dads.

And I'm kinda exited about that.

Not kinda, REALLY.

And I'm super nervous.




happy birthday

September 24 2007
to me.


September 05 2007

I can't get the feeling that something so horrible,

is going to go down.

I am not sure why...

Anywho, we think I have strep.

yaaaaaaaaay.... not