Loyalty or Love?

November 06 2007

so this is gonna let me know where you stand on this ... remark what you think . LOYALTY or LOVE?

   You are deeply in love with this man ( if your a guy... woman) who you are promised to be married to after he(she) gets back from war. Turns out he(she) gets captured & is assumed dead.

 you realize you have to move on , so say years down the road

you find someone else & you marry them.... only after to find out that he(she) is alive , & he(she) comes down to see you & says he(she) is deeply in love with you, and you feel the same.

But wait you married remember? your loyalty is with your husband(wife) , but your heart is with the other person.

so Loyalty or Love?

my purpose driven Crazy!

November 04 2007

crazy , my head is spinning.

smiling cause you cant see the truth!

looking straight and seeing things upside down!

seeing color in a gray world,

standing tall , but looking down!

They dont understand...

I know the way,

 but something is telling me to keep running.

im on my way to where God holds out his hands,

but i keep falling in every hole along the way.

gasping for the air thats all around me,

reaching for the sky , but not getting very far.

tears falling from my face ,

 i cant catch them fast enough.

falling off the bed , jumping off the cliff!

i cant go on without you dont believe id ever want to!

hold me tight, turn me around ,  pick me up off on the ground!

but you cant see the hole i am in, so how do you give me wings? i know i dont makes sense , cant you make it for me?

1 peter 1:5-6

October 26 2007

For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness;

and to goodness,


 and to knowledge,


 and to self-control,


and to perseverance,



this is really amazing verse, i get a verse of the day in my email inbox, they are really good, if anyone wants to sign up for it its free, & its really amazing how much it can impact your day!!! :)

it takes a little time sometimes

October 25 2007

I heard this on the radio yesterday, & i thought it really applied to the situations i get in, & the situations im still trying to get out of,  God mustve knew i needed it! :)

its really good....



It takes a little time sometimes

 To get your feet back on the ground

 It takes a little time sometimes

 To get the titanic turned back around

 It takes a little time sometimes

But baby youre not going down

It takes more than youve got right now

Give it time

Whats this walking thru my door

I know Ive seen the look before

 Sometimes in faces on the street

Sometimes in the mirror looking back at me

 You cant fix this pain with money

You cant rush a weary soul

 You cant sweep it under the rug,

now honey It dont take a lot to know


 Now it may not be over by morning

But rome wasnt built in a day

You can name this thing a thousand times

 But it wont make it go away

 Let me put my arms around you

 And hold you while you weep

Weve been talking and talking Im sick of this talk

 And its nothing that wont keep


No you cant fix this pain with money

 You cant rush a weary soul

You cant sweep it under the rug

now honey It dont take a lot to know



October 24 2007

I figure since this is the second time its happened(& second time its been a false alarm) its time i figure out a game plan!

      Since i live right in the middle of nowhere, and im also often left to babysit, and since i also have a wild imagination..... i need to think of a plan if someone was to try and break in the house, & im with the kids what to do.....

last night we heard someone bang on our door

Where i messed up::

*instead of checking to see what it was , i stayed in my room, and brought the kids in there

* instead of thinking logically i thought like a mad woman!

*instead of getting out of the house , and getting away i locked us all in one room

* instead of reassuring the litle kids its okay, i was like " We are All gonna die!!!!!  & if you touch my stuff , ill kill you before the person that kills us all will."

 Heres the Plan!!!!

 if there is any reason to assume someone outside in trying to get in , or someone is the house with me! 

i can

A. check it out, and figure out why i think that

b. or go straight to next procedure

which is ....

A. get the kids, and slip outside the opposite way i assume the other person is

b. Grab the phone and get the kids lock them in the bathroom

and  next step is

 Get me and the second oldest child with me( the first oldest besides me must watch the kids) and check around the house , in the house!!

& if everything is okay we go back to what we all go back to what we were doing!

 but if there is reason to believe someone is there ,but i dont see them personally  we will stay hidden & call the parents

If i see them , we call 911!:) and i find some useful weapons!

  hmm.... thats the plan , we might have to practice a little ... if anyone else has any pointers that might be useful feel free to share...

& id like for everyone to think up a plan for there benefit too.


October 22 2007

the less you say the more powerful your words are,

the more you say the easier to understand!

the less you say the wiser you may sound,

the more you say may make you look effecient in conversation

but one word can mean a lot more than sixty.....

the world's problem many times is not speaking up, its shutting up! :)



October 19 2007

Im going to cwood homecoming tonight!:) & im meeeting Austin up there. I cant wait to see all my friends..... i see angela a lot more than him,but i still even cant wait to see her, and i hope more than anything i can see Raleigh & Brett! & woody & Darren & Travis & Hannah & Laura & Natilee & OH kristin & EVERY body else! lol.Court says its packed so, i mean ..... what if i cant find them at all! that will be sad.

im pretty excited right now!:)


October 18 2007

You know i feel when you dont know how i feel that i know she knows, but you dont , and you cant , but you want to know, but you dont know that i know,but we both know you dont know that we know, or do u know that we know ? hmm. i think you think i am tlking about you but you dont know that i know i am not making any sense ... but HEY its just whatever.


im getting tired ....

October 17 2007

of the apathy of here......you really dont care & your blogs are ALL Pretty much how bored you are, & how you have nothing better to do.... it takes a boring person to be bored!! i just thought you guys should know ..... yall are really DEPRESSING! me! not tlking to everybody or anybody in particular .. just saying. ....... ......

Beauty & the Beast!

October 16 2007

so, Pretty much this story Starts off with the hansome Prince who refuses to help a poor old raggedy lady, she pleads with him to help her, but he again refuses, then this helpless raggedy image turns into a beautiful woman, and she cast a spell on this self obsorbed prince, He becomes a Beast, & as we know he has to find someone who love him with his ugliness, and he must learn to love before the last petal on the Rose falls off. not far off ,a beautiful young girl feels lonely and misunderstood:: she reads books, and She daydreams about getting out, getting a better life, & maybe meeting a prince.

     A series of unfortunate circumstances occur, which allow them to meet, she becomes his prisoner.after a few days this beauty starts to see the real person in this Beast, & manages to fall in Love.

    Meanwhile the Beautiful girls Father goes to the local hang out, 2 gather a group, to save his daughter that is trapped with a beast. the ignorant and manly Gaston is upset that the beautiful girl isn't interested in him. When her father claims she trapped with a beast, Gaston sees the opportunity to have him committed to a mental hospital, thereby forcing this girl to marry him.

But the beauty comes riding in, and proves there is a beast, and the townspeople decide to "KILL THE BEAST." of course, it doesnt work out,The beast & his castle wins in the end the Beast becomes beautiful because he learned to love. And they live happily ever after.

    Are You willing to Help others? The handsome Prince's character was tested when he was given the oppurtunity to help someone, and he blew it.So he was made the beast he really was.Our Character determines our real beauty, not our body. the beast was a self obsorbed hansome prince Remember. When he became ugly he became bitter. he was ugly all along, though.

Unlike the Beautiful girl, She saw the beast's outward appearance no doubt she thought he was horrifying. but she saw the beauty from the inside out, not the outside in. Thats how we should look. So Are you the beauty or the beast...?

i homesicked

October 13 2007

 so yeah....Camp was boring ,& im glad im home! i missed yall.


So pretty much i am trying to loose  6 lbs( thats not a BIG DEAL), dont give me the whole "oh your not fat thing." i know i am not fat,but i'd like not to have those six pounds.so how do you loose weight ? & i am not cutting down on my food supply i might change up some habits though, & im not throwing any of it up....



October 04 2007

i love you my goat!

 my goat i will keep on my boat.

you will be small, and clingy,

and not tall, and dingy.

you will be black & white,

and will go to sleep by my feet at night.

you will be my little baby,

maybe, just maybe.

we will love to play ,


this poem is gay.


But my goat  wont be.

..... p>



October 03 2007

Well. i got my haircut .... not sure if i like it ,i mean i do , but then i dont . i ll prolly get some pics on here later!

yeah , so lifes pretty ok right now. :)



September 29 2007
25 things that hold some significance to me! 1- God – Because hes there, he loves me , saved me , and forgave me) 2- The Bible (because its God word) 3- My mom (for many reasons , but she is always there ) 4- My dad ‘’ 5- My sister Courtney( bc she gets me out of sticky situations, and there for me to tlk to her) 6- The rest of my family ( bc I just love them) 7- My Real friends ( bc they are always there for me, and teach me) 8- My best friend Erin ( for so many reasons , but basically she understands me completely) 9- My other best friend Angela ( many many reasons) 10- my bf Austin ( lots of reasons , but one thing that significant to me is the way he sees things, and the way he makes me think) 11- My MIME team( Because they make who I a & keep me stronger in my Faith) 12- My veggie tales purse ( bc angela gave it to me , & I love veggie tales) 13- My pictures ( bc their memories) 14- Trident(citrus) gum ( for many reasons) 15- My Mime journal ( bc it reminds me of the things ive grown in) 16- My box w. a lock on it (bet u didn’t know I had one of those… it reminds me of my strongest weaknesses;) 17- The key to the box ( bc it opens the box) 18- My sisters ipod (lol) ( because contains my favorite song) 19- My cds ( bc they are the things I dance to) 20- My smiley face pillow ( bc tamara gave it to me , & I swear theres a thousand tear drops consumed in it) 21- My blue cup , bc it reminds me of middle school , and ms, Yates ) 22- My overalls (bc they make me feel like a little kid) 23- My myspace, bc its were ive had some great conversations 24- My pear necklace ( bc it makes me feel Girly) My Jarred (because he helped me with life , and we could always tlk)

I think She knows ....

September 25 2007

what she is tlking about!

 I read a blog a blog on myspace , from a friend of mine im not sure i should say her name or not , but i really liked it, or it was really useful to me...

her blog , was like quoting my life , i actually felt like she was tlking to me , more than to herself .. here are a couple of lines cut from it!

"those i used to judge i now understand but am more misunderstood than ever before"


"when you trust - be wise thats when youre in the most danger of getting hurt ---when you are the only one who understands yourself - keep a little smile inside because sometimes its better to be the only one who gets it ---"



Whatcha gonna do about that?

September 24 2007

You know i love that Trident (citrus) Tropical twist gum!

 for one more reason then yesterday .... :)




You! :)

September 23 2007

Baby when I look at you with your hair fallin' down and your baby blues
Standing there across the room I get so lost in the way you move
It makes me reminisce back to years ago on a night like this
Teary eyed as you took my hand and I told you that I'd be your man
So many have come so many things have gone
one thing that's stayed the same is our love is still growing strong

Baby just look at us all this time and we're still in love
Something like this just don't exist
Between a backwoods boy and a fairy tale princess
People said it would never work out
Living our dreams has shattered all doubts
It feels good to prove 'em wrong
Living our love song

Oh darling would you look at me
With my heart beating fast and my shaking knees
It's pretty hard to believe after all these years I still need you this badly
You're dancing in my arms with a spotlight moon in a sea of stars
Girl (boy) we've come so far everything I want is everything that you are
I just want to lay you down
Say I love you without a sound
I think you know what I'm talking about

Feels good to prove 'em wrong
Just living our love song

i am seeing things in 42s

September 21 2007

because austin says thats the # to life , im soo dizzy right now! i feel like i just got off that airplane on the way back to hawaiii !why did i take those dumb allergy pills?  SIDE effect: dizziness , drowsiness! i am bout the konk out in a few minutes!

oh , the many stars i see , i feel like ive been smoking something!



September 20 2007

Random thoughts for everybody:

" have you said what you need to say to somebody... if they died tomorrow would you leave that on yourself for not saying it when you could? "

        i just want to Challenge you on that , dont let the sun go down on your anger , or "dont go through life on your tiptoes , let the sand get between your feet" metaphorically speaking ,that is.





to the mimes!

August 27 2007

the things i promise you :



take me(you)  at my (your) word

i will ...live what i believe

i will..live out loud

i will watch the lamb

Its an honor to serve

i will keep your ...Best kept Secret!


things i will try to do:


Set You (me) free

reminds you its .. the End Of The Beginning

 remind you we can both be .. Forgiven!

Ill help you with the.. Basic Instructions

try to help this .... Youth of The Nation

try to remember .. I am Blessed!


things i will not do:

i will not leave  you .. Shaken!

i will not leave you in... shackles

testify against you in the .. Courtroom!

i will not ... GO!

hmmmm... things happen

August 21 2007

well. last night was different ....

 i like different !!

   I spent the night at Erins She sorta needed me , and we stayed up til like 1 just tlking ,i was helping her w. something , but we had a lot of fun being goofy ,

 when i sleep i like to cuddle ( i also like to put my feet like right on top of her)she wont let me she makes me sleep on the other side of the bed!!!! =[ LOL.

 well, it was good to be over there i hadnt eaten all yesterday except for some salty peanuts, so i raided her cabinets!   [ you will soon learn that erins home is my home]

but anyways ,  i had too get up this morning at like 7 and her mom dropped me off! now im a little sickish, just tired i guess , my nose is getting on my nerves!

 you know im really excited about things here lately!! i still have to pray about it , but ive been praying for awhile & i think this is what God gave me! from my prayers! a few of yall know what im tlking bout.... it just makes me smile!=] Austin knows from a few months ago what i told him, & its funny how God pieces together things!

  on a sad note, Pray for my dad he was on his way to pick me up saturday night, and he got in his truck on forgot his keys , ran to go get them , & he tripped over this dog , and went flying on concrete , he leg is really bad , if he wouldnt have had to get me he woudnt ve gotten hurt! we will have to take him to the doctor , my dads a pretty strong person i hate to see him limping & stuff!=[

yeah thats it!



i got voilet!!!

August 17 2007
Which Incredibles Character Are You?

Take this quiz!

Quizilla | Join | Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code


 not exactly sure how , but i got voilet!!!!! well, we look a little bit alike ..  but i dont i am like emo ....im sorta the exact opposite from her!!!

 IF i HAD A superpower i would want her Bubble force field!!! & being invisible i would like too ,=]



I ve been insulted ... in every Way!

August 13 2007

First , i wanna say I am not mad at anyone on here !

But I am a little flustrated because of one person on here!!!!!!!!

 insulted me in making me the idiot object .....

 then theres these guys who used to be my friends imed me , & called me ALL THIS STUFF!!!!it made me very mad! & every other line said 666 .... & it really made me upset !!!!!!!

 i was near tears, out of anger , ill admit that i was angry!! i didnt say anything mean to them , i was just u know what i think of this & they said wat?

 then i blocked them , i was sooooo mad !!!!!! its not wrong to be mad ...is it? i mean anger  isnt wrong its grudges , and hate that is wrong.....

 is it wrong to be mad ???

 upset ?? i know i have to let it go , but i want to hold on to it... but i know that it is wrong ....
 you gotta understand my frustration!!!!

wat 2 do?

 but i do wanna say my best made me cry tonite ... they were happy tears of hope


August 12 2007

so ,... this is to be one of the best blogs i am ever to write!


Why do we act like nothing is happening inside of us when its written across our fake smiling face?

 cmon guys~ im Tired of living this way FAKE

 FAKE FAKE!!!! just pretend what im sposed to be...

 I wanna be ...... MYSELF! BUT im scared what if me is not good enough?=[ what if my friends dont like who i am .. its better to be me , & not liked , then someone everyone likes  , and not me , ITS A BATTLE INSIDE MY mind!& who really knows you might be liked MORE FOR WHO you REALLY ARE!!

 its Like im Talking to GOD , and im like "hey , im doing my best that i can" why do i lie to the all knowing?

 i like a guy , but i was scared to tell him , like the worst he could do is turn his head![ might i add he didnt] why do we look at things like that? dont look at things inside of you , & it must be covered up , but more as HEY LOOK i am different , People think Christians are FAKE , and to be honest we have that problem of acting like its ALL GOOD In THE NEIGHBORHOOD! LETS BREAK THE STEROTYPE!

why am i scared to be me?

why am i fake ?


 im not doing this anymore..... its all me ... im taking this on! its ALL ME!

 Just wanted to share whats on my mind !

Boyfriend![just another...]

August 08 2007

Just another boy ,

 Just another chance at Love,

Just A  bunch of unfilled promises

         that we both promised to keep.

Just another friendship

  that we hope last forever!

Just another memory

 that seems to last a lifetime,

Just another oppurtunity

not to make the same mistake,

Just another dance

that we can step on each others toes,

Just another sweaty hand

that we say we won t let go,

just another kiss

we say we'll never regret.

 Just another Love note ....

 that will someday play our LOVE's song!

 - Elizabeth Allen