November 10 2005

You know, life can really get you down some times....... That
fact is soooooo true to me now after experiences over the past year and a half.
I realize now that life has just been bringing me more and more pain and I am
really struggling to cope with it. I know that through it I should fully trust
and rely on God's strength. I can truthfully say I have been striving to do
that but over time everything catches up to me and it is so painful. I am
really really discouraged right now with a lot of things going on. I feel like
I am taking a beating after I have already been beaten almost to death over the
past year and a half. I just wish I could have a break without pain. I wish I
could just have some time to fully recover from dealing with the deaths of
friends. Yet I find no time to do that. Don't get me wrong, I know I have
learned so so much and I have grown so much through those horrible experiences
but it doesn't numb the pain of the experiences knowing that. It can only do so
much to know that. I know I sound really depressing and I am sorry. I know that
God has a plan for everything that has happened to me but I tell you - I HATE
GOING THROUGH IT! I am getting so discouraged! I can't really describe the
feelings I feel. I am just amazed that I have made it this far. I know that is
due to God being behind me and I am thankful for that. But again that doesn't
numb the pain enough. I would take rest in God and I do try to do that but
again everything catches up with me and I get so down. I can’t understand a lot
of things and I probably never will but I just try to trust God has a plan for
everything and a time for everything. Ohhhhh I am just getting really
discouraged. Maybe it is just that I am having a rough day, I don’t know. I…….
well enough about all of this, I hope each of you have a good day. I am sorry
if I have depressed you or anything haha. Just venting a bit to maybe talk some
stuff out. Oh well I feel a little better. I hope yall have a good day.


In Him,



October 27 2005

October 27 2005

Hellooooooooo! I hope everyone is having a great night! I
hope that God has been blessing ur
soxs off. Cuz we all know he def blessed the White Sox, why not ur
sox? haha Anyways things have been good in the life of JMO. I am in cruise
control when it comes to school. Other than my Greek class, I am 10 miles
behind and trying to floor it to catch back up!!!!!!! But the thing about it is
that God has only equipped me with a 79 Pinto and it doesn’t go fast enough to
catch back up very easily haha. So im strugglein unfortunately. But its all
good. I am hopin this weekend I can crack down and maybe hit the NOS button for
a bit and gain some ground. It will be more like getting premium gas for the
long hall cuz a short boost of NOS isn't gonna do the trick I dont think. But
yup yup thats my story and im stickin to it....... I hope everyone has a great
night, day, whenever you read this. I will post to tell you how my catch up is
coming along during the weekend.....

In Him,
1Thes 5:16-18


October 25 2005

October 22 2005

October 22 2005
HELLO TO ALL!!!! I hope everyone is having a great weekend! I am having a good weekend.... very restful and because of that very good! Anyhoo i was bored so i thought I would drop a hello but thats it peace out homies.

In Him,
1Thes 5:16-18

October 21 2005

October 21 2005
I know that I probably shouldnt do this but Im gonna anyway.... I am SO MAD RIGHT NOW! I took my greek vocab exam today and there were 8 questions that I didnt know! I totally messed myself over cuz a test I should of gotten a high A on is now gonna be a high B or low A! I totally played my cards wrong. I didnt figure that there would be 8 questions about pronouns I figured there would be 1 or 2 maybe and I could handle maybe missing those and get all the vocab right..... WELL THERE WERE 8!!!! On and 85 question test so I totally played my cards wrong! Almost 10% just like that is wrong! GRRRRRR I try so hard and i slip up once and now that test grade isnt gonna help me too much! It will just be there. Ya know what Im sayin? Its not like I have a bad grade yet but I am so afraid it is just going to get harder and harder the further I go in and I need all the good grades I can get. This was an easy high A and I blew it! GRRRRRR oh well had to let that out now I gotta go study for a art exam i have today as well. peace out.

In Him,

October 20 2005

October 20 2005

Holla mi amigos and mi amigas! I hope everyone is having a
good day. Mine has been good. I am currently studying for two tests I have
tomorrow. One is a vocab test in Greek, the other is a test in art
appreciation. I am so excited about both of them haha. But yea, church last
night was so funny! I haven’t ever appreciated a dress up night as much as I
did last night. The outfits were so funny. From afros to shaq attacks to
shoulder pads haha just to name a few. It was funny. It was great to see all
the students get into it. All the way from the 7th grade up, it was cool. I
must say the milk shakes were amazing too. Sonic is amazing! haha I thought we
should of had coke suicides though haha. For those of you that ever partook in
Skate Center West, you know exactly what I am talking about! Don't deny it.....
But yea it was fun. Thanks to everyone who dressed up and stuff it made my
night go great. I hope that everyone has a great day!

In Him,
1Thes 5:16-18

October 18 2005

October 18 2005

WOW so it's been a while hu???? I know, I know all of my
fans have been waiting anxiously haha jk. Um I did my sermon today. Thank you
to all of the people who prayed for me and gave input in the planning.
Everything went very well. I was a nervous wreck but God used that to his
advantage haha. Anyways that’s the update...... But now to unload a bit.... I
have been thinking A LOT lately about relationships and how much God has
blessed me to have the relationships I have. I dunno maybe I am going through
my mid life crisis lol but I have been remembering so many old memories with
people that I have sometimes taken for granted. I have been thinking of so so
so many memories I have had over my 19 years haha. Oh some are so great and yet
some are sad and disheartening. But through all this thinking I am growing to
an even higher appreciation of the people that are around me right now. You see
I felt blessed for the time I had at MTCS and I knew that my time there with
those people was limited and God put a passion in my heart to live that time up
and make as much of an lasting impact as I could. Now out of MTCS I found it
hard to have that same drive but I can really tell God is rekindling that sort
of thought in my head again. Except this time it is not only the people I am
around here at lipscomb, it is also with the relationships I have had outside
of MTCS all this time that I some times neglected or took for granted while at
MTCS. God has really been opening my eyes up to how much life can change in an
instant. As the brokerage firm commercial says "nothing is constant except
change itself" I realize looking around that my life is radically changing
right now. My brother has moved. We are moving. My lil sis is a senior. My
grandfather isn't doing well, ect....... On top of that God is changing me more
and more each day due to the circumstances around me. All this just makes me
sit back and realize that I shouldn't so easily take relationships around me
for granted. It is sad to see that group of seniors last year that I was so so
so accustomed to, move on to college and I haven’t seen more than probably 10%
of them since then. Yet while they were still in the youth group I loved each
of them I also took a lot of the time I had with them for granted. Thinking of
that gives me a passion to stop and realize how truly lucky I am to have the
relationships I have with the seniors in the youth group now. I can't imagine
my sister being gone. I always tried my hardest to try to get the seniors ahead
of her to realize how much of an influence they had at their school by just
being a senior but I never thought that I would be thinking that way of my baby
sister. Anyways all that said haha, things are changing around me and the fact
they are scares me back into the reality of what life is all about - - that is
relationships. Life comes down to relationships. Relationship with God being
our first and then relationships with other people to have an influence on them
or help them experience God more. DON’T MISS THIS I know that I miss it so
often and for that I am sorry - - life is NOT what we are brought up being
taught. When we die nothing at all matters except our relationship with God and
the legacy we left in other people's lives. OHHHH I miss that so so so so so
many times! It is so easy to get caught up in life. A life that is so busy we
forget the reason we are here in the first place. God loves us and wants a
relationship with him. He wants us to help others see that truth. Without
having relationships we have no influence on other people. we can't. Grrrr I
wish I had the words to express this in a elegant way but, haha, I don't. Well
I think yall see what I am saying so I am gonna stop typing but I will leave
you with this. When life gets you down remember that life isn't about living,
it is about loving god and loving others. In doing that we will find what
living really is. (hey that was kinda elegant lol)  - - - I hope everyone has a great day. I will
see some of yall at church wed. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to have a
relationship with you.

In Him,


 Matt 22:36-40

"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the
Law?" Jesus replied: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and
with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest
commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' All
the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."



October 11 2005

October 10 2005

Living outside the city walls being shunned by your family and friends you once counted as your closest relationships. The pain that went along with the sores on your skin is almost as bad as the pain of being exiled. Picture this with me…… You are sitting around a table with your family and closest friends. To your right are your best friends that you have grown up with and to your left are your wife and two wonderful children. You are all eating, laughing, and joking and you sit back and think to yourself nothing could go wrong. You are surrounded by the people you love the most and nothing could make this life God has blessed you with any better or any worse. You are completely content. While you are sitting at the table, realizing how blessed you are you notice a sore that has formed on your wrist you haven’t in the past. You don’t think much of it and you finish your meal and enjoy spending time afterward with the people you count closest to you and love so much. Later that night when your friends have left and the children are in bed you re-examine the sore on your wrist. You wonder what the sore could be but don’t think much of it and go ahead to sleep. Little did you know that little sore was going to be the beginning of what would change your life forever. Over the next couple of weeks it increasingly gets worse. You try to hide the ever growing sore from the people around you by covering it up hoping no one notices it. After you realize the sore isn’t getting any better you decide to go secretly to visit a priest and see if he could help or even heal you some how. When you get to the priest and he begins to examine your sore you wonder if he can heal it. Stories of men with leprosy pop into your head but you quickly push them out saying that could never happen to you. When you look back up from the priest hands examining you wrist you notice the grim look on his face. As he slowly backs up you ask him – “well, is there anything you can do?” The priest the answers you “well….. according to the law of Moses you are unclean. We will put you in carotene for seven days and then we will re-examine the sore and see if it has gotten better. Your heart is broken yet hopeful that your arm could get better over the next week. So through the next week you keep you hope high that your arm will heal. On the fifth day you begin to really worry because the sore has only gotten worse! You begin to pray to God knowing that if you sore doesn’t heal in the next two day you will be permanently exiled. You pray and pray that he will heal you. You search your life for any sins that may have brought this disease upon you. Each day closer to the priest examination is torture to you knowing what is immanent unless God decides to do a miracle. With no avail on the last day, the priest comes to re-examine you arm one more time. When he ask you to pull your sleeve up you do so slowly and painfully. As you sleeve slides further and further up your arm the priest retreats further from you. He quickly explains that you are unclean and must go to a camp outside of the city where you will stay until God sees it fit to heal you from this disease.WOW you whole world comes crashing down! The news you feared has come true. You can’t believe it. You don’t know how to take it…. You quickly go to your house and with tears in your eyes, try to explain to you children why you have to go away. Your wife doesn’t even touch you for fear of contracting the disease herself. While she is crying she says to you “Please don’t touch me. We can’t. What will happen if both of us contract the disease? What will happen to the kids?” Those words pierce straight through your heart like a burning sword. If leaving everyone you know isn’t enough pain you can’t even give your family a hug goodbye! As you leave you tell your wife to explain to you friends what has happened. You cry as you walk towards the gate of the city knowing everything you have loved and cared for is going to be left behind. No matter how bad you want it back you have to wait until you heal and are clean. All you can do is pray and hope that your disease will not be permanent and you will heal soon. Years pass while you are in this colony. The sore has now spread all over your body. It is more painful now than ever. You have long given up on God. Every day you can’t help but think about your wife and kids and your friends you left behind and haven’t seen since. No one has come to visit you and you can’t visit them for fear of what they would say. Also for fear you would spread the disease to them. The words of your wife still ring in your ear. You can still see the confusion in your children’s eyes when you told them you had to leave. You think to yourself what your children are doing. You wonder how they have grown up. Are they happy? Is someone providing for them? What if they are in pain? All of these questions torture you mind to the point that you can barley bare it sometimes to the point that you have thought of killing yourself to get it over with. You ask questions like – Why would God let this happen to me? What is the meaning behind all of this? Why won’t God heal me? – If all of the problems you have are not enough, you have friends in the colony that have succumbed to taking their own life. You have to deal with those deaths. You have to also deal with the natural deaths of you new friends in the colony. You just can’t see how God can be behind this… It feels like you are living in a constant hell.One of the things that keep you taking steps forward is the thoughts of how life used to be. How life could be if God decided to heal you. You think of what you would do if you were healed. You think of the things you would do differently. You think of the love you would show to the people around you that you haven’t seen for many years. But as each torturous day goes by you loose little by little the hope in God healing you.One day while you were sitting around with some of you friends, one ask if anyone in the group had heard of the man they call Jesus of Nazareth. You have heard stories of this man but you didn’t know you could believe them as true or if they were just rumors. You had heard things like this Jesus was the messiah the prophets talked about. You had heard many stories of his compassion and of him healing people. Again you can’t know for sure if these stories are true. Your friend goes on to tell the group that this Jesus that everyone speaks so much about is in the city right now. He has been teaching and healing in the Synagogue. Most of the men dismiss the thought saying it is just a rumor and this man Jesus isn’t even real. They ask the man if he had ever seen Jesus. If not how can he validate his story. Some of the men even make fun of the man telling about Jesus. The thought ends up sticking in you head though. You go home and lay awake in bed that night wondering if what they say is true. Is this Jesus who they say he is? Is he even in the city? For all you know the guy who told you he was heard it from a dishonest man trying to deceive him and give him false hope. Who knows? You fight back and forth wondering if what you heard is true. You can’t help but wonder if this Jesus of Nazareth could heal your painful disease and give you back your normal life again.Well the next day you start thinking about going into the city to see if you can be healed by this Jesus of Nazareth. You ask one of you friends what he thinks about the idea and he is quick to exclaim “Are you crazy?! Look at you. You would be risking your life going into that city! People might have you killed before you even get to Jesus. Even if they don’t kill you, they will mock and ridicule you for even thinking you could enter the city. Let’s just say you get to Jesus, what’s to say he will heal you? He is a Jewish man, he will probably want nothing to do with you because you are unclean. If Jesus is as powerful as people say he is, he might even have you killed for coming too close to him! You have to be crazy to think you could be healed!” You are silent because you are thinking of what he has said. You both part ways and you go to a place where you can really weigh the pros and cons of what you are planning on doing. You finally decide that whether Jesus decides to heal you or not, you don’t have much to loose. You have heard stories of Jesus being a merciful man and you believe if only you get to him, he can heal you. The next day you wake up early in the morning and you cover as much of you skin as you can conceal. You sneak out of the colony and head towards those city gates you exited years earlier that you were never to re-enter. You make your way slowly up to the fates and walk through them to make you way to the synagogue where you heard Jesus was preaching. As you walk through the streets memories of your earlier life flood your mind. You on the right you see the building that you had your first job at. Then you see the market you used to come to get food at. The emotions of these memories overcome you and you begin to cry. As you pull your veil off you face to wipe your eyes a person catches a glimpse of what you look like underneath. He exclaims “Oh what is wrong with you! Are you supposed to be here?” That draws the attention of men and women around you in the street. You hear someone yell “he’s a leper!” Men and women then try their hardest to get as far away from you as they can. You hear mumbles and mockery. Men and women yell at you to go back to where you came from. On man yells “Why have you come in here and put the whole city in danger? Leave and go back to where you came from or I will call for help!” You try to explain to him you are only trying to find Jesus but no one wants to hear anything of it. The fear of you has quickly grown into anger. People begin to yell even louder as you try to proceed to the temple. The taunt you and spit on you saying things like you are a dirty sinner. You are unclean and Jesus wouldn’t want anything to do with you! Their were people who ran ahead of you and warned others that you were coming. There were people yelling and saying you have no right to be in the city! Suddenly in the middle of the taunting and yelling you here a faint voice say your name. When you look toward the direction the voice came from you see your wife standing their in amazement with tears in her eyes. You could tell you presence made her uncomfortable so you suppress the longing to talk and hold her and proceed past her so she would not be embarrassed by you. You continue to proceed to the synagogue as you are ridiculed and mocked. The people you once knew as friends standing off to the side looking at you like they have seen a ghost terrified of what you might do. The best way to describe the way people were treating you is in a way that you are not human anymore. People didn’t realize you were human and you still hurt from what they were saying and doing. When you finally reached the synagogue there is a crowd of people flowing our of the door. You hear a voice that sounds so loving and gentle. Everyone else was completely silent. You try to catch a glimpse of the man who was preaching. You hang your head low and push your way quietly through the crowd hoping no one would notice your leprosy. To no avail, about half way through the crowd a man catches a glimpse of the sores on your face. He quickly pushes backward to get away from you. In doing this he pushes the people behind and around him. You know what happened in the streets and you fear what is coming next. All the attention was drawn to you and as people pushed away from you. The only person that was unwavering was the man at the front of the crowd. He stood there looking strait at you in silence. His eyes were so inviting and almost attracted you to him. A religious man steps up and say “ How dare you come here to the house of God! How dare you defile all of us and interrupt Jesus.” You hear the mumbles and gasp of everyone in the room as you just push right on by the religious leader and fall on your face before Jesus’ feet. Everything up unto this point seemed minute. You had thought about what you might say to Jesus when you got to him but you could only say one thing… You humbly say to him “If you are willing, you can heal me.” You can hear a few smug chuckles from the crowd but it doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is what this man Jesus will do next. It surprises you when you feel the warmth of his hand on your shoulder. Then he says “I am willing, be healed!” Immediately you feel no more pain from the sores rubbing against you clothing. You can’t help but glance down at you hand and realize your sores are gone! You rise up to your knees and pull your sleeves back realizing all the sores were gone. You then feel your face for sores but find none. You look around at the crowd that has now completely become silent and see mouths open and eyes wide open and some people are ever shaking their head in disbelief. It was then you realized what you hoped and prayed for has really come true! You raise to you feet and filled with joy give the man who just healed you the biggest hug you could possibly give. Oh how long is has been since you had embraced another individual! Jesus tells you to not tell anyone how you were healed and go show yourself to the priest. But overwhelmed with joy you run to seen the people you loved and missed so much! As you run through the streets the same people who were mocking and yelling at you are now staring in disbelief wondering if you are the same person the saw earlier. You run into your house and give you wife a huge hug and tell her and your kids the great thing that had happened. Then you send a servant to go gather your best friends and bring them back so you could celebrate and tell them what had happened. That day and night you celebrate and share time with your friends and family once again. You wake up the next morning a new creation because of Jesus. You decide to go see Jesus again and tell him how happy and thankful you are but when you get to the synagogue you realize Jesus isn’t there……

For this leper his life was forever changed by a disease that God could have prevented. He was unclean in the eyes of the world and in the eyes of God. He probably thought his disease was due to some sin he had committed and never fully repented of. So just that fact people probably viewed him as a horrible unrepentful sinner. Though the cards were stacked against him he decided to have faith that Jesus could heal him of this disease. Because he had faith Jesus had compassion on him and healed him. We are also unclean. We are filthy sinners and it is not until we have faith in God’s unfailing forgiveness and his ability to cleanse us we are cleansed. We some times try to work to show God how sorry were are for sinning. We try to buy our way back into God’s love and grace. It is like we think Gad says “oh you did that, get back to me in a week, or month, or however long and maybe I will completely forgive you.” This is a wrong view of God’s grace. God can cleanse us no matter how much we have sinned and when he forgives and cleanses us, that is it. It is immediate. Just like the leper we are immediately forgiven of our sins. We bare them no more. If we ask forgiveness God will forgive us and forget our transgressions. We need to take heart in this promise. David describes this promise in Psalm 103 – as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. Once we have come humbly before God and repented and asked forgiveness of God we are immediately forgiven and we can live in hope and with an indescribable joy. Like the leper who was cleansed we also have been cleansed of any dark spot we have that keeps us in a colony outside of God’s presence. Therefore we also should have the joy and passion the leper had to show and tell what God has done in our lives. In Jeremiah 20:9 Jeremiah expresses this concept like this - But if I say, "I will not mention him or speak any more in his name,” his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot. We are so excited and joyful that we can’t help but tell others about what God has done for us. It would be selfish and wrong to hold it in. We as Christians are called to share the gospel with other.

October 10 2005

October 10 2005
Hey, How is everyone doing? I hope good.... I have been doing good but just a few minutes ago my friend Gavin told me that while I was gone this weekend, one of his friends in California had been killed in a motorcycle accident. I mean what in the world am I to say to that! I have been forced through this 3x in my own life and yet I couldn't find the words to say to him..... All I want to do is help ease the pain he is feeling, I want to help him in some way yet I couldn't find the words to say! When he asked me about Kyle I knew something was up but when Gavin told me about his friend, it was like a flood of emotions slamming through my heart. It was like every wound I had in my heart was being ripped wide open again. Because of these emotions I couldn't find the words to say. I spent most of my time just sitting with him. I don't know..... I could have gone on and on about my feelings and my experiences but I felt like that just wasn't the place to do it. I don't know what in the world I am suppose to do..... All I can go off of is the way I have felt and what I did, but in the three friends I have lost I also know that each situation was the same but so so so unique in there very own way. Because of this, I know a lot of what Gavin is feeling but at the same time there are so many factors I can't see. Grrrrrrr I just want to help in some way! I don't want him to feel the way I felt! I guess God will put situations in my path in the coming weeks that I can help in some way but I am afraid I will miss them or not step out in faith and use them. I don't know this whole situation brings up so many feelings and questions that have yet to be answered for me. For those of you who have lost someone close to you, you know exactly what I am talking about...... It is like one little word, or memory or song can trigger old thoughts and feeling with no warning..... It's just this time it is so much more than that. Having someone close to me having to deal with this is like a song or something someone says that reminds me of my experiences 10 fold. I can't describe it other than that. Anyways I am gonna stop writing but please please please be in prayer for Gavin..... Please also be in prayer for Jose's family and friends. Even if you don't know what this feels like I urge you to throw up a prayer because nothing can describe exactly what someone is going through with death. The strongest word I could relate it to is hell. I know that might seem over the top but until you have experienced what goes along with death you can't fully understand. All that said..... please don't miss realizing how much pain and hurt surround a situation like this. Please pray for the people who have been affected..... Anyways sorry if I was too blunt there....... Also, will yall pray that I can be a help to Gavin. If anyone has any ideas of how I can minister to Gavin or anyone in California please feel free to tell me. Thanks for your prayers. I hope all of you have a great day!!!!

In Him,
1Thes 5:16-18
John 3:30


September 29 2005
Aright so i know I have already writen today but I need any advice I can get on this.... I am doing a sermon in my communicating the gospel class and I have been given the text Mark 1:40-45. So I was wondering if yall had any good illustrations, insights, or just somthing small that I might could use. Anything that just jumps out to you or is odd to you could be helpful too. Basicly all that said, anything yall say will be helpful. If you nothing comes to you, no big deal. Thanks for the input. Here is the verses:
Mark 1:40-45

40 A man with leprosy came to him and begged him on his knees, "If you are willing, you can make me clean."

41 Filled with compassion, Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. "I am willing," he said. "Be clean!" 42 Immediately the leprosy left him and he was cured.

43 Jesus sent him away at once with a strong warning: 44 "See that you don't tell this to anyone. But go, show yourself to the priest and offer the sacrifices that Moses commanded for your cleansing, as a testimony to them." 45 Instead he went out and began to talk freely, spreading the news. As a result, Jesus could no longer enter a town openly but stayed outside in lonely places. Yet the people still came to him from everywhere.
(from New International Version)


September 29 2005

September 29 2005
Wow, well i broke my streak.... I don't know what to say for myself or to my fans that are disappointed...... Sorry. I have failed you all!!!!!!!!!!! But on the other hand maybe I was doing some of yall a favor. lol I have a question... Who has used face book? I mean how addicting is this thing? If you have it you know what I mean. Oh and if you have it and you are not my friend then you and I need to get together and formulate a plot so that we can become friends. (Sorry Nathan if you are reading this.... I know it's blasphemy to speak of another service on THE phusebox. But I have given phusebox the props on face book so its all good.) Ok so thats about it. lol Im trying to write a short entry, you know - to throw some variety at my reading community. haha I hope all of you have a great day!

Sptember 26 2005

September 26 2005
Well look at it!!!! Im on a role! What is this like 4 days in a row??? BOOOYAAA! I know, i know, my fans are are thinking "wow what could be better??" Well not much could be better than reading about my extremly exciting and glorious life lol J/K. Now on to serious matters. I was thinking today about how much God has blessed me with amazing relationships! God has been revealing to me that each relationship I have is given by him and I should cherish it so so so much! You see, a wise teacher I had in high school (Mr. Dan) came into class on his first day and wrote on the board "It's all about relationships" and then he went on a spill on how important relationships are and how all of life comes down to relationship we have with others. Now at the time I was in 9th grade and didn't comprehend the depth of what he was saying. But lately God has been revealing how wonderful this truth "its all about relationships" is. Over a long process I have begun to chew on that idea and realized how true it is. You see I realize that when I boil it down my ultimate purpose on this planet is to know God and to make him known. (cliff notes version lol) But when I look at both of those, both are based on relationships! You see, I must have a relationship with God before I can have an impact in this world for him. Then I must have a relationship with others on this planet to have an influence on them. So you see, I am starting to realize that even the smallest of relationships in my eyes play such a huge part in what God's view for my life's purpose is. If life really is all about showing God and making him known, every action I proceed on doing has an effect on others (relationships) and so I have to take that extremely seriously. God has blessed me by putting people into my life. He continues to bless me because he believes and wants me to use the love and passion he has blessed me with to impact others for Him. It would be selfish of me to take a relationship God has blessed me with and use it for my pleasure or just not give it my all. I am not saying I have to be best friends with every person and hang out constantly. Not at tall. I am saying it is selfish of me to make fun, leave behind, or neglect a person just cuz. You see I as a Christian am called to a higher standard than the world around me. While the world says - "go for the throat! It's a dog fight the whole way up so get the upper hand. Make fun of people to advance your prosperity. Don't talk to those "friends" of yours that you have become to popular for. Whatever it takes to be the "coolest" or most powerful, do it." God calls me to uplift anyone he has put in my life. To treat them as if I were Christ. Though I will never be perfect at loving and reaching the people around me, God calls me to strive to be that way. I think something else God has shown me in this whole process is that he loves and cares so so so so much for each of his creations. I know that is obvious but when I really think about the extent of his passion for the hearts and souls of his creations, I can't help but think about how selfish it is of me to be mean, or inconsiderate to another person. I see now that God loves and cares so much for that persons heart and soul, who am I to hurt that heart or soul through my selfish ambitions! It would be like me just saying -"hey God, see this person you love and care for so much? do you see this child of yours that you are working so intricately with to draw them to your side? Yea, well I am going to hurt them because I want to look better in the worlds eyes. I’m going to hurt that heart that you are so tenderly touching. All because of what I WANT!" Though that’s not what goes through my head when I hurt someone for my own benefit, i see now that is what I am saying with my actions.
Again, I’m not sure if any of this made see but oh well lol. it makes sense in my head lol. I hope that everybody is having a great day! I hope and pray that anyone that reads this will in some way hear God in it some where.

In Him,
1 Thes 5:16-18

September 25 2005

September 25 2005
Well here I am again! BOOYAA! I am sittin here in good old High Rise waiting for monday to hit so I can start a new week at school. Well my weekend has been great. I mean things have seemed so right this weekend. You know what I mean??? When you just sit back and completely relax in the fact that God has everything in your life under control. I dunno if you know what I am talking about but this weekend was one of those times. But now I am off to another week here at lipscomb! Looking forward to it but at the same time nervous cuz I don't know what new challenges will be put in my path... But in a way I am looking forward to those challenges cuz of what God has been showing me this weekend. I kinda want it to be put to the test so that God can refine my new thoughts into what he wants me to know and hold onto. Yet at the same time I don't want to ask for trials to be sent my way lol. Oh well what ever comes, just comes. Whatever it is God has put it in my life for a reason. A reason that is bigger than I will ever be able to comprehend fully. That is what is so cool!!!! I dunno God has really made me think a lot about how I should really just forget about trying to manipulate the situations I am in. Because God has me in these situations for a reason. It would be selfish of me to say - God, I want this to be this way and that to be that way and I am going to do this to accomplish that. - Don't get me wrong I know that God wants us to cry out to him and tell us everything, including what we think is best. But when I really think about it, God has everything under control. Even the bad situations. I know what you might be thinking. Wow JMo, your just telling me things I have already heard and thought about. Thanks for wasting my time, writing this for me to read. But you see, Im not writing this to strike some divine thought process in someone’s head. In part I am writing this to talk out a little bit of what God has been showing me. But most of the reason i write this is to maybe just spark some sort of thought or to just simply encourage someone. Cuz God has encouraged me, I must now share that with other believers to in some way maybe encourage them. I don't know I am still trying to organize all of this in my head, so sorry if this made no sense. lol. I hope everyone has a great day!!!!!

In Him,
1Thes. 5:16-18

September 24 2005

September 24 2005
BOOOYAAAA SKEEEDADEEEE!!!! I hope everyone is doing great. I'm gonna have to say I am doing extremly well. I am just sitting here right now listening some Audio Adrenaline Boot Leg lol I know, Iknow, its soooo old but its all good. It's an oldie but a goodie as many people would say. But yea so get this.... Today I was like boooyaaaa Im gonna do somthing a little different im my time with God. So I busted out the new Casting Crowns CD. Its amazing I would suggest it. I must say it's a little less in your face like their last album was but it is good in different ways. Um but I flip to track 9 the song called "Prodigal." So then I crack open the old CD lyrics and get this - - - The lyrics have verses to go along with each song. I tell ya, it was so much fun listening to the song and reading the verses that corrispond! I mean I never thought about a devotional that matches songs lyrics with verses. It is cool because it put into more of a perspective what the song is about. All that said. I would suggest listening to a little bit of the new Casting Crowns album if not going ahead and buying it. If you do get a chance to borrow it or buy it try doing a quiet time with the cd and reading the verses along with the song. I don't know maybe Im just late in doing this but I think that is the coolest idea! lol. So yea all in all things are great in my world considering a few circimstances. Thanks for thinking enough about me to read this lol. Peace out everyone, I hope all of you have a great weekend!!!!

In Him,
1Thes 5:16-17

This is one of the verses that went along with the song - - - 1John 1:9 - - - If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

BOOOOOYAAAAAA until next time!!!!

September 23 2005

September 23 2005
BOOOOYAAAAAAA! How is everyone doing. I know what you are thinking.... WHAT JONATHAN IS LEAVING A POST!!!!! I know, I know, my fans have been waiting for a long time to here from me again. LOL You would think the younger brother of the dood who made this thing would be in the groove with leavin blogs and stuff! Oh well I try my best!!!! Ok so to catch everyone up on the past month of my life --- just kiding I know that would be impossible, I would use up all the memory in Nathan's server or how ever this site works?!?!!?!?! Ok well things are good considering a few things that have been unavoidable. But that is for another time and another blog. But even through those things God is completly faithful and is continueing to bless mymy socks off. About Lipscomb........ it is good. I am finally getting into the groove of the work and stuff so that is a praise to God. But the largest thing school wise is that we are begining to slow down in my Greek class!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel so great knowing that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ok beyond Lipscomb now... get this!!!! James Mattila, which is the man I was praying for after Katrina has been put on the safe list!!!! That is a definate answer to prayers. I was beginning to get discouraged because every time I checked to see if James had been found his name would still be on the lost list. I even remember reading a post from his sister asking for any type of information on James and hurting thinking of what her and James' family had to be feeling. But the thing that is so cool was right when I was beginning to get discouraged God totally suprised me and answered my prayers for James. I ended up sending an email to his sister last night expresing how excited I was and that I was praying for James and the Mattila family since Katrina. I havn't got an email back yet, but that is totally cool. I am just happy James has been put on the safe list! Praise God!!!!! So yea I have probably writen too much but I am gonna try to blog a little more again. Until next time I bid you fair well!!!!

In Him,


August 26 2005

August 26 2005
FRIDAY!!!!!!!!! My first week is complete! BOOYAAAA!!!!!! Things are going aright. The thing is .. Satin has really been attacking me today! I tell ya it has been hard to get through today with a smile on my face. I am trying to stay in the word and hold on to what I know is true. It is so hard though. Even that seems like it's not helping much. Anyways if anyone who reads this would throw up a quick prayer I would appreciate it.

August 25 2005

August 25 2005
What up? My first week is almost done HAHA! On top of that..... I have no greek i HAVE to do tonight!! On top of that, Sanctuary is tonight. Which is a worship service led by students here at lipscomb every thursday night. Its really good. It was definatly one of my favorite things about last year. ------- So I am super excited about what God is showing me already. He is teaching me so so much in just the 4 days I have been here. I can really, truely tell this year is going to be much different. I have a passion in my heart that wasn't there last year. This passion is for the people here at Lipscomb and to show Christ to them in every way I can! The reason I am so excited about this is because it feels a lot like the passion I had at MTCS for the peole there! The passion I had at MTCS drove me to passionatly pursue God's plan for my life. I can tell the passion I have now is doing the same! I can't wait to see everything that God is going to show me this year!

Be joyful always, never stop praying, give thanks in all circimstances for this is God's will for you in Christ. 1Thes 5:16-18

August 24 2005

August 24 2005
Hey I don't mean to blow my horn but I got on Lipscomb.edu today and I am on the opening page lol! Its crazy I know! Go to it and check it out, you have to watch it for about 15 seconds and there I am.

August 23 2005

August 23 2005
Day 2 of college is complete, at least the classes. Today was good. I only have two classes on tuesday and thursday! The only bummer about that deal is one of the classes is Greek! Man it is so hard. I have to be able to read greek tomorrow!!!!!! I just learned the alphabet last night!!!!!! It's really scaring me how fast we are going through the material. I went to Communicating the Gospel today. It seems like it will be a very helpful class if I am ever to preach in front of people. I am terrefied of public speaking but I am extremly excited about what this class is going to teach me. Another cool thing about this class is that I have the same teacher (Dr.York) as I did for my Life beyond the matrix class last year. I really liked him then. He is very theologically minded. Very deep in other words. I can't wait to see what I am going to learn in this class. A cool thing Lipscomb does is a 24hr pray room at the begining of the school year. I got to go pray last night for Lipscomb and the school year and all the students. Today at chapel time we closed the 24 hrs of praying with a prayer service. It was cool to be a part of all of that this year. I guess last year I was too busy doing freshman things to stop and go to the prayer room.
So things are going good, I might write a little more later but I need to go buy some books right now so until then I hope everyone is having a good day.

Though you have not seen him, you love him, and even though you do not see him now, you beleive in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy
1Peter 1:8

August 22 2005

August 22 2005
My first day back at Lipscomb has been great. I am taking intro to communications at 8:00. I am really looking foward to that class. It turns out my teacher is really cool. He has a speach inpedament that he encountered just three years ago. You can really tell that God is using him to touch the sudents he has. It was cool because despite his disability he is still giving his all to what he does and loves. It is encouraging to me to see how much passion and joy he has for his work. He had a power point video telling about himself and it was cool because it was very personal. He was talking about how he beleives that God has put us in his path for a reason. I am excited to see what God has in store for me in this class. I can already tell God is moving in that class. My second class was Greek! YUP! Greek! It is such a hard class already. lol I was absolutly no good at spanish in high school so I am not sure how well I am going to do in this class. Im gonna give it my all though. It will be my hardest class this semester. I am about to go to my art appreciation class at 1:00 so we will see how that goes.----- All that said, I am really excited about this year. I can really feel God moving and working in my life and through me. Even though I am not worthy He is faithfull! I am excited that a lot of people from this past MTCS class are here too. I KNOW that God has a plan for me being here. I know that and it excites me so so so much!!! I can tell that God is moving and that gives me comfort and joy.

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present you request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard you hearts and you minds in Jesus Christ. Philippians 4:4-7