Hey, How is everyone doing? I hope good.... I have been doing good but just a few minutes ago my friend Gavin told me that while I was gone this weekend, one of his friends in California had been killed in a motorcycle accident. I mean what in the world am I to say to that! I have been forced through this 3x in my own life and yet I couldn't find the words to say to him..... All I want to do is help ease the pain he is feeling, I want to help him in some way yet I couldn't find the words to say! When he asked me about Kyle I knew something was up but when Gavin told me about his friend, it was like a flood of emotions slamming through my heart. It was like every wound I had in my heart was being ripped wide open again. Because of these emotions I couldn't find the words to say. I spent most of my time just sitting with him. I don't know..... I could have gone on and on about my feelings and my experiences but I felt like that just wasn't the place to do it. I don't know what in the world I am suppose to do..... All I can go off of is the way I have felt and what I did, but in the three friends I have lost I also know that each situation was the same but so so so unique in there very own way. Because of this, I know a lot of what Gavin is feeling but at the same time there are so many factors I can't see. Grrrrrrr I just want to help in some way! I don't want him to feel the way I felt! I guess God will put situations in my path in the coming weeks that I can help in some way but I am afraid I will miss them or not step out in faith and use them. I don't know this whole situation brings up so many feelings and questions that have yet to be answered for me. For those of you who have lost someone close to you, you know exactly what I am talking about...... It is like one little word, or memory or song can trigger old thoughts and feeling with no warning..... It's just this time it is so much more than that. Having someone close to me having to deal with this is like a song or something someone says that reminds me of my experiences 10 fold. I can't describe it other than that. Anyways I am gonna stop writing but please please please be in prayer for Gavin..... Please also be in prayer for Jose's family and friends. Even if you don't know what this feels like I urge you to throw up a prayer because nothing can describe exactly what someone is going through with death. The strongest word I could relate it to is hell. I know that might seem over the top but until you have experienced what goes along with death you can't fully understand. All that said..... please don't miss realizing how much pain and hurt surround a situation like this. Please pray for the people who have been affected..... Anyways sorry if I was too blunt there....... Also, will yall pray that I can be a help to Gavin. If anyone has any ideas of how I can minister to Gavin or anyone in California please feel free to tell me. Thanks for your prayers. I hope all of you have a great day!!!!

In Him,
Jonathan
1Thes 5:16-18
John 3:30