Who are you? My soul rages within me to know your face, your name, your very being. Why have you been withheld from me for so long? Why have I not met you, or at least know that you are mine? I have patience in my Lord to bring me to you, but I need a light. I need a beacon from you to tell me I’m on my way to you. But the night is so dark and cold. The rocks pierce the hull of my heart like spears and are ever plentiful. How will I find my way to you? There are false paths that seem so inviting. But I know that their way is treacherous. Surely, my route is lined with peril at every turn on my way to you.

My God, I believe, but help my unbelief. I know she’s out there. But where… who… and when will you reveal her to me? Please my God and my Lord, take this pain from me. This anguish inside of me, only you can quench. Contend for me oh, Lord. My adversary hates me and preys on my weakness. Strengthen my hands for battle that I may fight for her all the days of my life. Raise her up with honor and bless the work of her hands as she tirelessly labors for your kingdom. My Lord, You are worthy. You are mighty in battle, and You are the sovereign Lord of my life. Bring me to her and guide my path. Be my shield and buckler about me, Oh God, as You navigate my way through the waters of uncertainty. Your way is good and Your love is whole. Be glorified in her life as well as mine. Be my life, my love, my joy, my contentment, and then, I will be ready for her. Until then, Blessed Savior, guide me by your merciful hand into fields of serenity surrounded by your grace. Prepare my table and may she sit beside me when you have filled my cup. Help me to serve her as You have served me, with Your life. Allow my shallow attempt at love echo all the more of You.

-Jeff