Nicole

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God, School (some what), intelligent conversation, books, music, theatre, shopping, road tripping with my buddies, chocolate, obviously updating my two online journals, dancing, singing, politics, mock trial, riding horses, writing poetry and stories, working on my scrap book, taking random pictures, watching movies, muddin, spendin what little time I'm given with the love of my life, trying to keep my life under control .freefever { This layout is from www.freefever.com/myspace } body, body.bodyContent { background-image:url('http://i140.photobucket.com/albums/r6/cwm1021/layout_bg/16484332_l.jpg'); background-position:Top Left; background-repeat:repeat; background-attachment:scroll; cursor:Default; background-color:white; scrollbar-face-color:FF6666 !important; scrollbar-track-color:FF0000 !important; scrollbar-arrow-color:FFFFFF !important; scrollbar-shadow-color:FFFFFF !important; scrollbar-3dlight-color:FFFFFF !important; scrollbar-darkshadow-color:FFFFFF !important; } table, tr, td {background:transparent; border:0px;} input {background-color:transparent !important;} td, span, div, input, a, table td div div font, body, body.bodyContent div table tbody, body.bodyContent tr td font { color:FFFFFF !important; font-family: "Georgia" !important; } td, span, div, input, table td div div font, body, body.bodyContent div table tbody, body.bodyContent tr td font { color:FFFFFF !important; } body, body.bodyContent, div, p, strong, td, .text, .blacktext10, .blacktext12, a.searchlinkSmall, a.searchlinkSmall:link, a.searchlinkSmall:visited, .btext, .redbtext, .nametext { color:FFFFFF !important; } a { cursor:Default !important; color:FFFFFF !important; } a:hover { cursor:Default ; color:FF9999 !important; } img {border:0px;} body, body.bodyContent, html {visibility:visible !important; display:block !important} div.msmnet{position:absolute;right:5px;top:35px;border:1px solid rgb(128, 128, 128);background:url(http://i140.photobucket.com/albums/r6/cwm1021/msmaster/fade.jpg) repeat-x 0 0 ;padding:0;margin:0;}div.msmnet ul{list-style:none;padding:5px;margin:0;}div.msmnet ul li{padding:2px;}div.msmnet ul li a:link, div.msmnet ul li a:visited{color:rgb(128, 128, 128);font-family:"Trebuchet MS", Arial, sans-serif;font-size:12px;}div.msmnet ul li a:hover, div.msmnet ul li a:active{background-color:rgb(128, 128, 128);color:white;text-decoration:none;font-family:"Trebuchet MS", Arial, sans-serif;font-size:12px;} MySpace LayoutsMySpace LayoutsMySpace CodesMySpace Backgrounds

“Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” -Albert Einstein

January 07 2008

In other words, love is not a science. Today’s blog entry is on internet dating sites, eHarmony for example. So here is your disclaimer: Warning this blog entry may be offensive if you participate in internet dating sites and matchmaking services. Nicole is in no way claiming that your relationship will fail if it began with such a site, but she does have a very strong opinion about this issue. In this entry she will be delving into her opinion of these sites and therefore may be irritating or offensive in some way.

 

I’m not really sorry if this offends you, but honestly, how can anyone reduce love to a bunch of questions on a survey? And how on earth does a survey convey a person’s real personality? Love is not a formula or an equation. It’s when two hearts reach each other in some cosmic connection that runs so much deeper than that. It’s a sort of unity of souls. Yeah, yeah, sappy I know. But seriously folks, since when has love ever been as finite, unchanging, and perfectly logical as a math equation or scientific formula. Loving someone is rarely a logical and well thought out choice. Love is about say fuck logic and going with that tug that you feel when you see someone or hear their voice.

 

Deep compatibility… again with the survey and the perfect matches. Honestly opposites attract, a lot. Sometimes on the surface you have nothing in common, but deep down you just sort of fit. If you like everything your partner likes that’s great, except you will probably have absolutely nothing to talk about. Differences spark conversation, and they get you to learn new things. Just because two people answered some survey questions that say they are a match doesn’t mean they actually are. I’m fairly certain most couples I know wouldn’t be matched up if they both filled out one of those profiles. It just doesn’t jive at all.

 

“It forces you to be honest”: This is a direct quote from the commercials. How does that work? How does a website questionnaire make you do anything you don’t want to do? Does it hold a gun to your head and shout tell the truth or die? Does it wrap you in Wonder Woman’s Lasso of Truth? The answer is that it does none of this. Honestly, I have a theory, for every completely honest person who goes on that site and fills out the survey, there are at least ten who will lie. I mean, wouldn’t you want to say what you think someone would want to hear? It’s human nature to want to put the best foot forward especially when you are trying to impress a stranger or a potential ‘mate’. I watch those stupid commercials and wonder how many people have arranged a meeting with someone the site matched them with, only to be terribly disappointed and discover that their potential ‘match’ is not at all what they imagined them to be. For every happy couple, how many people are rejected or fail to meet a match. And how many psychos make profiles just to seek out potential victims? Forces you to be honest, my ass.

 

And finally, I may be a cynioc, but I believe in love. And love is not something that just ‘poofs’ in because you are matched on a website. You will not magically fall in love with a person the moment you meet them just because their answers fit your answers. Love comes from knowing a person and becoming close to a person. Surveys do not let you get to know a person. And surveys are just as bad as their ‘picture and a paragraph’ that they say is so terrible to use.

 

So that is my blog/rant on internet dating sites like eHarmony. I warned you that I didn’t think highly of those sites and that this blog would not be sunshine and daisies.