It's fun to be stupid, so I decided to be so.  I got onto EBay today and bought a microphone for $.01, then started bidding on a piece of recording/editing/mixing software at $.99.  Unless someone else decides to bid against me, I should be expecting the prize sometime next week.  Otherwise, I can just buy the software for about $10.  Still not too expensive.  After buying all of this, it will rot in my closet for the next few years before I sell it all at a yard sale for a few bucks.