I've been having a rough week. My boyfriend broke up with me, i'm about to drop out of school of not having hope and my father past away last week.

.....pow

Hey PhuseBox... Life Is Still Feeling Lonely For Me... I'm Still Searching For My Special Someone I Need In My Life And I Hope To Find Her Soon... I Know That Having God Is All I Should Need In Life But I Feel Like I Wanna Be Loved Too... God Made Eve For Adam, So I Need Someone To Love Me Too... Life Just Doesn't Seem Right At This Moment Because People Don't Know What They Want In Life And They Don't Take Anything Serious... So, Everyday Is Just Another Cold, Lonely Day Of Life For Me Until I Find My Special Someone To Be In My Life...

I love reality shows...HOWEVER does Ashley Parker Angel think he is Zack Morris?  Seriously....do you guys remember that Zack used to say "time out" and everyone would be still and then he would talk to the camera?  Well that is what this guy is doing except with better special effects.  I really can't stand watching him be all melodramatic.  I don't know maybe I am just in a bad mood and I needed someone to project it upon. So to Ashley Parker Angel....Did you really think this was a great concept for your show when your producer pitched this idea to you?  Think again....you suck!  If you are going to have a reality show.....let us see reality, not your version of how reality should be.  Can you imagine if you could really just put your life on pause like that?  How freaking weird would that be?

LoL, Well, there have been some changes in my life, (FINALLY!!!), but like always, I had to take it in my own hands to do it.

Anyways, today, actually about five minutes ago, I broke into Mrs. Daniels room when we were suppose to go to Miss Bohall's room. So, a few people and I who are in Mrs. Daniel's first period are now in her room while she is on a field trip.

I have to say I haven't felt like this in a long time... it is like I am about to fight... adrenaline... and it feels great... LoL

Ahhhh, to the future, whatever it may hold!

Malus Asinus = Latin for Bad Ass

Sup everybody?
Wow, im actually having a good day today.
(maybe because I just ate snikkerdoodles, yumm :D) 
Uhm, tomorrow i'm going to a tractor pull in kentucky.
Can you say redneck america?
 I'm just going to hang out with Michael and Bre. And to get out of state for like...20 hours. hahah.
Because I don't want to go home, and plus no school.
Even though tomorrow we only have a half day. Heh.
But still...no school :DD
Bonarue (sp?)  Is coming up.
Galactic (the best Jamband in the world), Beck, and radiohead will be there & a lottttt of other bands.
I'm excited.
And then a Chevelle concert is coming up, yay.
Saturday is going to be the bomb diggity. That's right...bomb diggity..because i'm going to erica's house and we're going to make a jackass movie.
:]
Yippeeeeee.
Hummmm.
njwkebfhcjkasdb
I'm bored and there really isn't anything else to talk about.
I love you all, God bless.

Ashley

They see the scars upon her arm but never wonder why the pain she feels is so unreal sometime she just wants to die, to take the pain and throw it away for a moment of happiness. to never have to wonder why it had to be like this? to wake up in the morning not wondering why she can't die, to be able to walk through the day and from god she would not have to hide. to take the moments she almost had and make them real again. to take the weakness inside her and be strong again to finally sleep good at night instead of crying alone, wondering why the god above wouldn't just leave her alone. she tried to ask him for his help but he was never there it was like he turned his back like he never knew she was there. so then she took the god she loved and threw it all away for a life thats not worth living but it makes it seem ok. 

they take each last tear i have,

i live without tears,

they take my heart and rip it open,

i live without heart,

they stop up each hope,

so i have no passage out of hell,

they give me pain,

so i live with pain,

they give me hate,

so i live with hate!!!!!!!!!

by: jimmy santiago

okay so today after school i gotta go to the bank and get my business done there. so i can get all of that good stuff ready..

later ima go home and change into pants most likely and then go eat at chef whangs with the gang and play dinos later (:

im excited. :D

i need to start planning my budget... that and apply to some other jobs maybe... : i dunno

sam is willing to pay everything for me and i really dont want him to do that.. but its things i really need done (i.e. my car! - its barely running...)

and sam's a computer genius so hes gonna upgrade my computer, etc. and whatever else he wants to do. (:

my new cellphone # is 615-785-3314 if you love me text me :D

 i am not going to define my whole senior year with one production. it would just be nice to be recognized for once. to show all my hard work and dedication has gotten me somewhere. and yes, aaron, i'm maternal (protective/motherly) about you! the fighting makes me nervous. lol.

Hopefully, all this work has gotten me somewhere! pray for my sanity and patience! *emily*

Hello Friends ! I decided I was gonna go for a little run yesterday. I haven't ran in like forever. I ran 5.6 miles and felt amazing. I got back to the house and thats when it hit me that I went way too far. I had to freaking lay down in the shower because I didn't have enough energy to stand up. Then my dad wanted me to help move some stuff because we are putting hard wood floor throughout out entire house. Yea its cool. But I just didn't have the energy. I almost killed myself. Another bad mistake I did was not drink water for like an hour and a half later. I did have me like 10 grapes though. At True North man I wasn't feeling my best at all. But I drank some water and I felt alot better. Anyone wanna go run with me today? It suppose to be a high of 70 today !

So, in trying to come up with what I will do this year, I've come up with a couple of ideas...  I could take golf lessons--I've NEVER golfed, unless you count Putt-Putt, or I could take art lessons.  That might be more fun, and it would definitely allow my creativity to have a little fun.  It's getting harder to move furniture all around in the house, so I might need a new outlet...  Just thinking...

tonight was about the truth. plain and blunt, it was put in front me, and it was a last chance to fix things in my life and i did so. so tonight i had a guy named andy open my eyes to the real world. not the real world we live in but the one i live in, and how i was about to fall and not get back up. so i had to amke a stand tonight in my car after crying for 10 mins in fear of what could happen to me. then i did it i fought a demon, yes that what i said a DEMON. there real just as real as i am writing this at 2:50am. anyways as i was saying. i just made a simple prayer asking for god to lead me with the right weapons to fight with, as well for my sheld to protect myself with. i have be liveing my life as a lie untill tonight, well not really a lie but more or less i have been just live a simple easy way out christain life. you know the life to where you just believe enought that you call yourself a believer. well thats changed and now in 100,000% believer and this goes out to god ,my father in heaven, my king of kings and lord of lords,this goes out to the holy spirt for the people he used tonight and to day for me to open my eyes and come to him. thank for the top to the bottom of my heart.

mike sanders

i have been doing some thinking lately... lots of stuff really tonights main thing was how unprepared for life/college i am not good its kinda scary.... help!

attractive...yeah ...we know.

we went to an interesting guitar concert for our intro to music class
for single's awareness day
and well dani got the time wrong and we were there 30 min early
needless to say
WE WERE BORED
and these are the pictures that resulted

What place is this?
Swear I've seen it before
Somewhere inbetween
Life and death

The bright light
I swear, consumes me
Just like I had never
Been at fault

If this is peace
What is Heaven?
I never wanna
Go back home
Keep me here
For now and ever
Never send me back
To that hell

What life is this now
The life I lead
I swear what is
This book of Life?

I claim, my life
Will never be the same
Nothing close to
What I was before

If this is peace
What is Heaven?
I never wanna
Go back home
Keep me here
For now and ever
Never send me back
To that hell

I've been here before
Somewhere between life and death
And this time
I'd love to stay

I want to know how something like this can happen from such an ignorant bitch!

Hello Loves...

                         So how has everyone been?Good I hope I havent been so good lately.Have you ever liked someone ((like...not love...but you like them alot))..but you just feel like you're nothing to them....just like a **rebound**..they are just using you?I am so confused...I feel like I am not god enough..he expects more from me..but I dont know what.I want him to give me a chance...just one and he will see how much I care for him.It's not just an **I like you**care..it's just that I CARE about him in so many ways...it's just so hard to describe how I feel right now..I feel heartbroken... used..played...not wanted..is this crazy?I know that I am not in *Love*...but I just feel umm..head over heels.I dont know who he wants me to be...I want to be myself but I cant..I want to tell him how I feel*but I cant*....what am I supposed to do?I have come to the conclusion...that maybe i've gotten myself into something thats not allowing me to be...me!I want to give up...but then I dont..and all I know is that I care for him and I want to be with him...he just doesnt realize it yet....nd maybe I dont either....**Please** help me....♥Ashleigh

Here are some quotes about how I feel...

He ignores all the girls who
want him because he's too
busy noticing her ♥

My head is saying...Who cares about him*and my heart is screaming I do...he's your drug and....your addicted♥

Why cant I just get over you.... Why do these feelings have to be true? Why do I have to care about you..... why can I just forget all the cute things you do.... I wish these answers I could see.... I wish I could just forget about you.. like the way your forgeting about me..♥

***This last quote I would really like for that **person**to read..***

 I sometimes feel a little jealous inside imagining someone else could please you more than me.... guess it`s my insecurity acting up a bit.. because I know i`m not the most beautiful or the most fun or even the most exciting person you`ll ever meet, but i do*'
know that no matter how long and hard you search, you`ll never find a girl who likes you && cares about you the way I do. ♥

so the only good thing resulting from "valentine's day" is the day after
when the candy goes on sale for 50% off!!

dani got yummy truffles!!!!

yay!!

so yesterday was quite eventful-ish.

first of all, there's this boy... and i like him, a lot.

so, yes, he's my promdate, and he was my valentine. =]

but, anywho.
yesterday i went to go see him,
he had to work though,
and he works at opry mills..

so, i got on I-24 at 5:00..
3 miles later...
stand still rushhour traffic...
and it lasted 30 minutes.
= /
i was about to turn around,
but i was determined to go see him =]

so, i finally got there at 6:30
"/ but its okay.
i got to see him, and i stayed for an hour.

but yeah.

he makes me happy, and its an unexplainable feeling.
i LOVE this feeling.

his morning phone calls put a smile on my face...
as well as after-school phone calls...
and the phonecalls that end my night.

i'm happy.
and this is just what i needed.

so, being patient really paid off.
=]

[thankyou God]

it's the heart afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance
it's the dream afraid of waking
that never takes a chance
it's the mind afraid of losing
that never learns to give, and
it's the soul afaid of dying
that never learns to live.

tomorrow's thursday.

that means friday is soon. half day.

definately gonna hang with Carly and hopefully Abby!

yay.

"Look at the nations and watch and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something  in your days that you would not even believe even if you were told."    

Habakuk 1:5

that wasnt me in that last post..it was my amazing and extremely sweet friends that know my password..ha.

Yeah tommorrow is my interview with Mayor Tommy Bragg.  Im kinda nervous.  I'll get a picture of myself in my suit and tie and post it on here so that I look spiffy.

I'm not exactly sure why, but there seem to be so many songs that I am hearing lately that fit perfectly with my current life situation - the lyrics often express so poetically the things that I can't seem to find words to express.

It seems that each time I turn on the radio or go to the next randomly shuffled song on my ipod, the song seems to be an arrow directed straight at my heart. But, driving home tonight, I heard a new Rascal Flatts song that hit much deeper than any I've heard lately - just thought I'd share the lyrics.

"What hurts the most

Is being so close

And having so much to say

And watching you walk away

And never knowing

What could have been

And not seeing that loving you

Is what I was trying to do" 

WOW! That seems to say it so perfectly!

its crazy, but sometimes we dont realize that some of the smallest things that we do, or listen to, can break down the strongest people.  it was kinda weird.  something just got to me today that usually doesnt.  and it was a curse word.  i mean yea, i hear it everyday.  but today i heard it, and it just kept repeating over and over in my mind.  for two hours it was being repeated.  and i prayed over it, i tried to listen to some other music, but it just wouldnt seem to go away.  and it wasnt anything caused by myself, it just came out of no where.  i was sitting around my truck talking, and then all the sudden i heard it from another person that just drove by real quick. So it wasnt anything huge, but i still heard it.  and yea, i mean we hear it every day.  but something about this time, just this one time.  it was like a little seed, or a small flame that was just put into my mind.  and then it kept repeating, or growing hotter, untill it was just all over my mind.  and having all that in my mind shows.  it shows on my physical and mental appearance.  i dont know really where that came from.  i know it was a God thing.  but it still was kinda weird.  but i guess it is a good thing.  we cannot become used to, or okay with the world.  we cant believe that that is just how the world is.  and the world has its standard so low.  no, we cannot afford to do that to ourself and to our God.  so stay pure.  step back and just look at what is being said.  in our schools, out in public, in the music that we listen to (thats a big one). and just everything else.  STAY STRONG BROTHERS AND SISTERS.  peace out.

http://www.myspace.com/irishgirl420

do it.

wow...today couldn't get any better...
tonight at church we had a talk about saying uplifting things instead of negative things about people all the time, even if we were joking.

then pastor nathan gave us a sheet of paper, we put our names on it, then passed it around so everyone could write something nice about you.

wow, i never recieved so many wonderful comments in one day...hahaha...i loved it...

i love life.
i love the person i've allowed god to shape me into.
holy crap, god's amazing!!! =]

[becca]

i have the strangest urge to walk about in a tank top, mini skirt, and flippie flops... whose with me???

time. time is the, in my opinion, priviledge we most taken for granted. as i was working today, my mom told me that my grandma up in new york is on that fine line of life and death. she has a severe case of pnmonia and really sharp pains coming from her legs to her back. she has done this once before a couple years ago at Christmas time but she has pulled through. well learning of this sudden illness it caught me off guard.  i cant remember the last time i talked to her. its not because i didnt want to, it has been because i have had the time too. in the next few days she may pass on the our awesome Lord. it makes me sad that i didnt say goodbye. i am unable to call her now because she is in severe pain. this year i might not get to ask her how my beloved yankees are going to do this year. i love her so much and i know that she knows that.

on another note, in about 3 weeks i will have completed my younglife training. i am visiting the area clubs. this past monday i visited oakland. it was pretty cool. its a lot different from riverdale. this monday i will be visiting siegel. i would like to personally invite you to club. it will be at carter trouts house on monday at 800. directions should be in the cafeteria. if you are wondering what younglife is heres a good chance for you to know. so please come see my good buddies zach, clay, jamie, scarlett, krista, laura, and emily. and of course i will be there. thats all i have. have a awesome week. peace.

eddie

so...this is my first blog writing on phuse box. lets see what is there to talk about? oh i now how about yesterday. well as most of you guys know yesterday was valentine's day,and it was about the most crapiest day i have had in a while, first off i got stood up and that just blows. then drove around town all night,sounds lik fun....not really. so thats how my valentine's day went. today i just sat around at music world and play guitars for a while then some drums  but today might be better on tonight i hope but well have to see.

mike -sanders

midstate should be enjoyable. mostly because of boys.

the play is going by really slowly. that's not good. if some people would learn their lines...and if the boy dancers would learn how to count...oh well...it'll be better soon. hopefully.

i love it when i fall into that abyss of not liking anyone. it's a lovely place to be. the world doesn't look at me as if my life is one story of unrequited love. english, bah.

LOVE/ Britt

Love will be waiting for me....
I just have to be patient.....
I will find the love I want.....
I will be happy.....
The waiting will be worth it.....

okay, fellow readers.

i use this phusebox to spill thoughts, right?
just as it was made for, correct?
99.9% of my posts i won't "take back"

i'm not going to edit my beliefs
because someone may not like it.
i'm not saying everything i type is right;
but i am saying i have the
right to speak my opinion.

i post only what's on my mind that moment.
while i'm concious of the way i word things
(i never post names of people if it would
embarras them in any way.)

if you're hurt by anything i do; tell me first.
because it won't do anyone any good if you tell
everyone BUT me you're mad. i want to
try to fix my flaws.

abbydee

'listen up,
and try to understand
i wish i could explain
but the words are lost at hand'

yeah i don't know
here is my update for those waiting for it.
i think im sick
i'm shaking, i have a headache and i'm tired
so i guess imma go curl up and go to sleep

So im fine with it now, as long as somone ::cough::nonames::cough:: keeps me smiling and laughing which im sure he will because hes the best kid ever, im fine, im totaly fine and this time im more reassuring myself... somthing just... gawd, somthing just feels right now... somthing... maybe its him, maybe hes just everything i cant see and always wanted... i hope so. <3 (gawd hes gonna read this and know EXACTLY that im talking about him)

::+::Chelsey::+::

I just found out yesterday night that my Mom might have had a stroke. Please pray for her.

Its The Middle of the week and it sucks like dirt-

The end

Pretty sure I didn't get the part. Darn nerves, usually they help me, not this time.... *sad*

so while i was at school today, steve secretly cleaned out my car!!! for those of you that know me AT ALL, you know what kind of disaster area my car is. and it has gotten pretty bad lately. but my precious boyfriend cleaned it! he got out all the trash, vacuumed the floorboards, and semi-organized my trunk. he did as much as he could before i took all my dirty clothes, dishes, papers, etc out and sometime next week he is going to finish it for me (his idea!) and then we are going to wash it.  he's amazing. i called him to see if he wanted to go get lunch inbetween 2 of my classes, and when i asked what he was doing, he responded "cleaning out your car." i almost fell in the floor! 1) because of embarassment and 2) b/c of sheer amazement!

oh yeah, valentine's was good too! he had to work, so i went to vagina monologues and then he cooked me dinner. seriously guys, i'm the luckiest girl in the world. ok, i'll stop bragging now. love you all!!

i bought these apple in-ear headphones in december and i really liked them, but all of a sudden about a month ago they just got really quiet and you had to turn up the ipod a ton to hear anything. so needless to say they didn't work anymore and i wanted to return them and get something different. long story short... apple is mailing me a new pair for free no questions and they don't want the broken ones back.

normally i think i wouldn't tell alot of people about this so that no one would take advantage of a great corporation like apple, but i know the 3 or so people that will actually read this know better. i also know that it's only $50 of product and they probably wouldn't just mail me a new G5 if i called to tell them mine was giving me that sad mac icon.

anyways i'm a dork and i think i just proved it. but in a few days i'll be able to hear zach morris as well as see his tight rolled jeans thanks to itunes and my new earphones.

 (p.s. i've also turned over a new leaf and the mean streak is gone. i think it's cause i'm dealing with an upcoming birthday and i needed a change.)

shopping today....
field trip tomorrow.....
half day on friday....
MILITARY BALL ON SATURDAY........
~tRISH

i miss the snow!!!

My dear husband spoiled me this year!

My favorite boquet flower!

A new couch!!! Yay! Delivered to our home on Valentine's Day.  I spent all morning deep-cleaning the room and polishing the floors, rearranging furniture and pictures. I'm so happy!

I made a heart-shaped cake for our MOPS meeting.  It was really easy.  Just a 9x9 square turned to a diamond, then 2 halves of a 9" circle for the heart tops.  Very fun.

We also celebrated on Sunday night with dinner at Olive Garden.  YUM!!!

Front Row;;Keith Urban;;Amazing
Car door slams, it's been a long day at work
I'm out on the freeway and I'm wondering if it's all worth
The price that I pay, sometimes it doesn't seem fair
I pull into the drive and you're standing there.
And you look at me
And give me that come-here-baby smile
It's all gonna be alright
You take my hand
You pull me close
And you hold me tight.
It's the sweet love that you give to me
That makes me believe we can make it through anything
'Cause when it all comes down
And I'm feeling like I'll never last
I just lean on you 'cause baby
You're my better half.
They say behind every man is a good woman
But I think that's a lie
'Cause when it comes to you I'd rather have you by my side
You don't know how much I count on you to help me
When I've given everything I got and I just feel like giving in.
And you look at me
And give me that come-here-baby smile
It's all gonna be alright
You take my hand
Yeah, you pull me close
And you hold me tight.
It's the sweet love that you give to me
That makes me believe we can make it through anything
'Cause when it all comes down
And I'm feeling like I'll never last
I just lean on you 'cause baby
Well, you take my hand
Yeah, you pull me close and I understand.
It's the sweet love that you give to me
That makes me believe that we can make it through anything.
Oh baby, it's the sweet love that you give to me
That makes me believe we can make it through anything.
'Cause when it all comes down
And I'm feeling like I'll never last
I just lean on you 'cause baby
You're my better half.
Oh, oh baby, you're my better half.
Ooh, hey baby, you're my better half...
You're my better half.

Okay so I know its a day late but I don't care, I need some random mental occupation right now. This "coulda-been-afabulous-day" could really turn sucky so I'm hoping it won't.

VALENTINES SURVEY

1. Do you like anyone?: if you don't know then you've been under a rock
2. Do they know it?: If he doesnt then HE"s under a rock

IN THE LAST MONTH HAVE YOU. . .

4. Had someone buy you something?: yep
5. Bought something?: yep yep

6. Gotten sick?: unfortuantly yes, lets not go there
7. Been hugged?: yes, amazing hugs!
8. Felt stupid?: isn't that part of everyone's day to day life?
9. Talked to an ex?: no
10. Missed someone?: yes
11. Failed a test: no, i'm a nerd                                                        12. Eaten cereal: probably but don't ask me to tell you what kind or when                                                                                               13. Danced crazy: haha last night!!!
14. Gotten your hair cut?: nope, but i dyed it!

UNIQUE

16. Any nervous habits?: biting my nails, shifting my weight, nervous blabbing
17. Are you double jointed?: yep in my hips
18. Can you roll your tongue?: yes
19. Can you raise one eyebrow?: no but I've always wished I could
20. Can you cross your eyes?: yes
21. Do you make your bed daily?: HA, that depends on how much effort it involves

HAVE YOU EVER. . .

23. Said "I Love you" and meant it: everyday.
24. Given money to a homeless person?: yes, and food
26. Waited all night for a phone call that never came?: yup
27. Snuck out?: a loooong time ago
28. Sat and looked at the stars?: yes but not in a long time
29. Do you swear?: only when i'm REALLY emotional
30. Do you ever spit?: no cuz I always seem to do it when the wind is blowing
31. You cook your own food?: when I'm feeling froggy
32. You do your own chores?: yes
33. You like beef jerky?: not especially, I have to be craving it
34. You like pepsi or coke?: pepsi if I have to choose                      35. You're happy with your hair?: most days, i'm looking forward to some highlighting soon
36. You own a dog?: :( I wish                                                           37. You spend your money wisely?: I don't have a choice
38. Do you like to swim?: yup
39. Get bored when you call a friend?: when i get bored, i DO call a friend.
40. Are you patient?:  Yes I believe I am, a life of waiting and trials has taught me that

DO YOU PREFER

41. Flowers or Angels?: flowers
42. Gray or Black?: depends i like my gray car but i love black pants
43. Color or black and white photos?: i like them all!                        44. Lust or Love?: Love - b/c you get both the heart and the . . . a. . .well you know
45. Sunrise or Sunset?: either is beautiful and thought-provoking          46. M&Ms or Skittles?: M&M's b/c I am one!

0N VALENTiNES DAY Q`S

1. Are you in a relationship?: yes and it's amazing!
2. If so, who with?: Michael L. Fisher
3. Sign?: capricorn
4. Do you believe in love at first sight?: nope, first feeling maybe but not first sight
5. What about true love?: definately
6. Have you made out with casual people?: can't say as I have
7. Would you kiss on the first date?: nope
8. Do you look for one night stands?: hmmm NO
9. Do you enjoy recieving flowers?: really, what girl doesn't!?

10. Do you enjoy gifts from your girl/guy?: yes, but that's not what it's all about

++VALENTINES QUESTIONS ++

1. You have a valentine planned out to have?: yup!                               2. Do you like having a valentine?: yes i do b/c he's AMAZING!
3. Does someone like you currently?: if not he deserves and oscar
4. Are you even worried about the upcoming holiday?: no sir!

what happened to #5 and 6???

7. Is a little kiss (peck on cheek) during school on vday sweet?: a little kiss ANYTIME is sweet!                                                                  8. Have you ever gotten something from someone on the day?: yep
9. Sweetest thing that has happened to you on v-day?: just spending the day with someone you both love and like, no matter what it is.

   So nothing too big today. I succesfully moved a majority of my itunes from one computer to another. I am working on adding some umph to the weekyly newsletter that I send out to the students. It's pretty boring. For the second day in a row I am the last one in the office. I hate having to lock up.
Elizabethtown was a great movie, I may need to buy the sound track. I really liked it, I had a great valentines day with the girls! So tonight I hope to go to be early. I may work out at home. I joined a gym but I have not been there yet. I am a little intimidated by the people there. I need to go with some one so I can get comfortable. I have a visitors pass, anyone want to come? So only one more day left for this week. Might go see Mute Math at the Knitting Factory in the city on Friday night but not sure. I have to get two cavaties filled so we will see how I feel after that. Have a great night everyone!

"Nutter
Butter Massacre of '72" - A little film put together by Noah Hardwick and I
exploring a monumental event in the history of snack food
violence.

this is from my wonderful dani

mustang cobra?  honey...they're like 2 totally different animals.   they don't go together.

fortunately dani is wrong and they do go together and are beautiful!!

yes i realize thats not a cobra but it's the only pic of a mustang i had on here

I never thought I would be this excited to go to school, but after three weeks of horrible soaps and unwilling naps, I'm pretty excited. I'm trying to take things one step at a time when it comes to school. Today was a half day so of course I thought I could handle it. Today was probably the longest day of my teenage life. I fell asleep in 5 out of 7 classes and had 2 teachers tell me to just leave and go home. But OH NO, I stayed until the very end. And then I went to Jason's Deli and Planet Xchange with Kaitlyn. So today, overall, was pretty successful. I'm still excited.

so yeah.

my parents got me a Ben Harper dvd for Valentines Day.  Last night I decided that instead of the whole haveing a terrible v-day because I don't have anyone in my life that I would just remember all the people that I love and that love me, it doesn't have to be about just that certian type of love.  :)

I declare v-day from now on agape love day!

oh and I had to hold my passenger side door closed with a towel, while I shifted and drove,  it was one of the most difficult things I've ever done in my life.

"If God gave it to me, it's mine. I can do what I want with it."

No, the truth is that it is our to that Him for and ours to offer back to Him, ours to relinquish, ours lose, ours to let go of- if we want to find our true selves, if we want real life, if our hearts are set on glory.

Think of the self that God has given as an acorn. It is a marvelous little thing, a perfect shape, perfectly designed for its purpose, perfectly functional. Think of the grand glory of an oak tree. God's intention when He made the acorn was the oak tree. God's intention for us is "... the measure of the stature of the fulness of Christ." Many deaths must go into our reaching that measure, many letting-goes. When you look at the oak tree, you don't feel that the "loss" of the acorn is a very great loss. The more you perceive God's purpose in your life, the less terrible will the losses seem.  

Elizabeth Elliot-"Passion and Purity"

 So yesterday was Valentines Day and as usual I spent it by myself. I had a lot of time to think and to cry about things. Sad? Yes. I was thinking about my current confusion and stuff. I'm not going to bore/torment you all with a long paragraph, just state this. I thought a lot, and didn't enjoy the holiday at all.

I never update this thing, so if I don't write you back, it's not because I don't like you. In fact, I probably love you. I'm just busy. So, we'll holla. Love, Heefus.

yeahh so i'm never on this.. only at school.. haha

but i love my girls Danielle and Keri!

Have a great Day...

<3maribeth

I want fufuberry!! ---erin

My dad's in the hospital. Please pray for him if you can. He was having breathing problems and bad chest pains. He went into cardiac arrest and now he has some brain damage. He's responding a little to us when we talk to him and the doctors as well. Keep us in your prayers please.

HEy YeStErDay, my whole class went to the Shakespeare play MacBeth, and it was at Navy Pier, and i think that was the best part. I got a cheap-o $2 bracelet and the lady who was selling it was very ummmmm......unsettling. She had and Indian accent and reminded me of Osama, but hey, its not my job to judge, so, i guess she was ...nice.  AAAnyway, i'm in computer class again and Mr. VanderWould(computer slash history teacher) still hasn't figured out my master plan of going online during class.MMMmmmwwwwwwwwwahahahaha.     ....that was wierd, but o well, ciao

Hasta Luego

DEZ

may have killed the cat; more likely
the cat was just unlucky, or else curious
to see what death was like, having no cause
to go on licking paws, or fathering
litter on litter of kittens, predictably.

Nevertheless, to be curious
is dangerous enough. To distrust
what is always said, what seems,
to ask odd questions, interfere in dreams,
leave home, smell rats, have hunches
do not endear cats to those doggy circles
where well-smelt baskets, suitable wives, good lunches
are the order of things, and where prevails
much wagging of incurious heads and tails.

Face it. Curiosity
will not cause us to die -
only lack of it will.
Never to want to see
the other side of the hill
or that improbable country
where living is an idyll
(although a probable hell)
would kill us all.
Only the curious
have, if they live, a tale
worth telling at all.

Dogs say cats love too much, are irresponsible,
are changeable, marry too many wives,
desert their children, chill all dinner tables
with tales of their nine lives.
Well, they are lucky. Let them be
nine-lived and contradictory,
curious enough to change, prepared to pay
the cat price, which is to die
and die again and again,
each time with no less pain.
A cat minority of one
is all that can be counted on
to tell the truth. And what cats have to tell
on each return from hell
is this: that dying is what the living do,
that dying is what the loving do,
and that dead dogs are those who do not know
that dying is what, to live, each has to do.

Interesting past couple of days. Mike and I have been talking a lot. He seems like a really great guy.  I had to watch all the kids and Billy last night. Twas much fun. I helped Joshua with his social studies project and it is looking pretty darn tootin good! I didn't get to go to church last night so my parents could go out. It kind of makes me sad because I love going to church, but I know my parents really needed the time together.

I had a massive head ache this morning. I woke up at 4 something feeling like i was going to die! I didn't even get in bed until about 3 o clock so I didn't sleep long at all. After a while I got the courage to try to move I felt terrible after doing so but luckily I didn't have to move much. I found some pain killers laying on one of the tables beside my bed and a water bottle sitting oh so conveniently beside them. I don't even remember putting them there yesterday... or ever for that matter. I took them and still didn't feel too great when it was time for me to get up for school. I decided to skip my first class and try to go to my second one. I ended up missing both but I got a call from a friend in my first class saying that our teacher wasn't there so class was canceled. So even though I skipped both classes I only missed my math class (which is no big deal at all because its only algebra).

I think I am going to join choir at church... I think. I really want to but I am kind of freaked out about it. I am going to go tonight and sit in on their practice, maybe that will help make up my mind.

Well I have SO much homework to do. So I better hop to it.

~Vale~

It's been a while, so the question is where to start...

I've discovered that life is nothing more than a series of problems drawn together.  I quoted a job of an installation to take no more than 5 hours, thus 2 weeks later, it is not good that it is still not done.  But thankfully their store now has sound, but their sub and amp is completely blown.  I take little fault in this even though I was the tech working on it.

Secondly, doing a tv install at a wachovia bank, the company i worked for did not send me all the material needed. In fact i had to put a 27" tv w/ dvd/vcr combo in my car (note: i drive a saturn). Also, did you know that it takes 2 hours to find 3 feet of inch and a half pipe in nashville?

Finally, a quick recap of my "crappy" valentine's day. And with out going into too much detail, i will say that the word choice is for literal meaning since a customer at wal-mart decided they were a little too good for our toilet.

Hence, life is nothing more than a series of problems each with a solution. Live and learn i guess

right now i feel like crap. i dont know why. i'm thinking it's cause i'm sick.

i'm in the library right now. the story of my life. i need to start studying better, and more. oh well. thats how it goes. i hope i start to feel better. this sucks.

piece

Today Is Another Day In Life That God Let Me Live... I Thank Him For Everything He Has Done For Me Like Forgiving Me For My Sins, Providing Me With My Wants And Needs, I Have Everything A Person Can Ask For Or If I Don't Got It And If I Want It Then All I Have To Do Is Be Patient And Pray For It... What More Could A Person Want If You Got That... You Gotta Talk To God About The Things You Want In Life And He'll Provide It To You, Thats What He Really Wants To Do... Our Christian Duty Is To Let Everybody Know The Word Of God, God Loves You And He Always Will... God's Arms Are Always Open, But The Devil's Arms Are Always Closed... The Devil Wants Your Attention By Getting You To Be Bad So He Can Take Away Your Relationship With God... But Im Not Gonna Let Anything In This World Prevent Me From Having My Relationship With God... My Thought Of The Day Is "God Died For Me, And I Will Die For Him Also Amen"

Verse Of Today Is:
Micah 7:8
"Do Not Gloat Over Me My Enemy! Though I Have Fallen, I Shall Rise, Though I Sit In The Darkness, The Lord Will Be My Light"...

My youth minister has got a thing, well i guess it's more than a "thing", he loves U2. Our stage for journey is somewhat related to U2's stage during their last tour. So we have 800 styrofoam balls we are drilling holes into... and then stringing them. fun? i don't think so. Journey starts in 2 days and i have about 100 done. Oh goodie! I had help though! we sat there together, my drilling and her stringing, cursing U2's name... That was the funnest part! Gotta go do some actual computer work now, peace.

So school is going well, but we graduate in like 3 mons!!!! I'm kinda gettin tired of comin..... work is ok... its work, what else is there to say about that? Friends are good, and wow.... at like 9:30 last night, I had a valentine! YAY! (don't ask!)   I was sick all week last week, and had to miss school on thursday, leave early friday! But I'm all better now.... another short week for me too, we got out monday, and 1/2 day on friday! YAY!!!!  but I will come back and write more for you.... love you guys!!!!!      mj*

Why are there so many questions and so many dead ends in life. How can I find my self wanting when everything is right here. I don't know where I am going but I know I always want you with me to have and to hold forever and ever... why can't we just fast forward to two years from now when we'll be older and ready for the life we want. Why are there so many questions....

so yeah ...................in the middle of 2nd period and really bored........
couldn't those weirdos who make textbooks actually come up with exciting labs....................???
prbably too much to ask because if you're writing a textbook you're lif isn't too exciting in the first place............. hardly an enviroment to make other peoples lives exciting.........................

sorry about the delay on this one but other matters were more pressing... so without further ado the Quote of the Week...

"If you want me, here I am- LIKE I AM."

-Flannery O'Connor in her short story "Good Country People"

hello everyone, my name is kelsey shearron, and i'm so cool. In fact i'm too cool to go to school because i went to a concert last night!

And I love my friend Tara Davis, shes cool too because shes black.

jesus is my homedog!!!!!!

Well, the weekend was good, did absolutely nothing after my Governor's School interview, which went well. I will know in about a month if I got in or not, so until then I just have to be patient. The week, though, has not been so good. Monday I just sat around and played Final Fantasy VIII (yes, I am a geek). I got a big ole lecture from my mom, about how I have to change to make others happy when I could not be more miserable, which of course I thought to myself *Mom, you have no idea...* but like the good young son I kept it all inside waiting for another day to explode. Say La Vi... Why do other people always want something from me? Well, I guess that is not really fair to say about everyone but it seems like it. Dad was really pissed off at me after the argument with mom, can't really blame him, after all I get the protective gene from him. House was hilarious like normal, so that made me hapy for awhile, but my mom seemed happy with the "progress" she made. Basically, she wants me to not talk about how I feel and be a "yes, ma'am" or "no, ma'am" kind of attitude. Well, I feel a little bit better... venting is good...

Oh, I have a fencing competition this weekend!! Yay! I am going to win, I've decided. LoL I am doing Sabre and Foil, my two best weapons so I think I am insured a spot in the top three. Well, I guess that is all. TtYl

I wish people would accept me for who I am, and for what I do.
=[

so yesterday was valentines day (:

i had fun. (:

sam got me a balloon with wings (sparrows) and it was heart shape and said love on it. (:

i also got chocolates, a dozen of yellow roses (:

and....

a giant puppy dog thats soft and its sitting in my car. (:

we also had reservations to outback for 7:26 and we got there 30 minutes early. but we still sat there until 8:30 and still hadn't been seated. so i got pissed and complained and kinda cussed the hostess out a little bit and so i told sam that we were leaving. so we sat in the car talkin about where we were going to eat. And i was like y'know what? picked up my cellphone and dialed outback's number placed a togo order and pulled up in the drive through and was out of there in 15 minutes. :D

then i texted ben and he hooked us up in the mcdonald's orientation room and it was so sweet because he got us a rose and some candles and chocolates and was our waitor if we needed him and yes we tipped him. it was so sweet i felt so special. :D

it was a great night and i enjoyed it.  (:

i love you sam.

so yeah....... the day after valentine. I sincerely hate that day!!!! its no fun!! but oh well....i hope this day gets better cause school is so dumb!!!!!!!!!!!                          bored........................................

................................................................bored........................

............................................................................bord..............

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz    

last nite, i went to my lil sister's house and gave her a special Valentine/B-day present. and she got me and my brother calanders for Valentine's day (mine was RAINBOWS ^^ and my brother's was Star Wars ). and we hung out and talked and watched some High School Musical (i got the soundtrack yesterday ^^).

i hope today goes well. we have West Side Story rehearsal after school

"We're all in this together
Once we know
That we are
We're all stars
And we see that
We're all in this together
And it shows
When we stand
Hand in hand
Make our dreams come true"
-High School Musical

photo from Zhae

photo from Zhae

Ok today is the day after Vday ugh kinda a sad day dunno why ,perhaps its because i just swallowed my gum on accident , or Juss whts left over after this holiday. Im bored!!! lol and i seem to be lacking in the friend list interaction!! u ppl need to talk more :P

"S.W. also has someone else,

This seems like a pattern, and apparently it fortells...

I am deemed single for a while at least,

Orion guide me, because all is not well.

RayMan

I consider myself to have a pretty high pain tolerance. That being said, I try not to take pain killers unless I absolutely have to. Well, my tooth has been killing me today. It was giving me a splitting headache so I dugg out the mepergan fortis (a strong painkiller with anti-nausea additive). Now my stomach is upset, which could be attributed to the Mexican food I had for dinner.

Ultimately, I need to get this broken tooth fixed. The problem is, dental work is expensive. I know that if I go to the dentist, he will want to do an examination first. He'll find that my teeth aren't in the best condition. Then I will have to schedule a second appointment to actually get the tooth fixed. I'm also afraid that it is going to require a root canal.

This tooth had a filling many moons ago. That filling fell out last August (I think), then the tooth broke on September 28th (my birthday). It hasn't bothered me too much until now.

Dentists don't scare me. Dentist's bills scare me.

Ha, I thought it was funny that there was a shirt that said that at the concert tonight. I would have gotten it if it didn't go against everything I stand for...and wasn't 40 bucks. But the show was amazing as expected...you can now all be envious...amina was great too. there is just so much emotion tied to their expression that they seem to fade and it becomes personal...worship time even...something about not being able to understand a word he is saying is so freeing...im tired...

never put your soul
into someone you dont know
because when you turn round you see your frown
yet all the while a smile
you feign

youre drowning in this place
yet its all voluntary
what you thought you once loved
your partridge...your dove
is nothing more than a part time friend
...your blindness must be hereditary

its time for a change so you go all the way
only to find out that youre the stray,
youre lost in this world without a trace
of the light of your love...no sign of her face
her favorite roses...the sunset she'd say

ive been a bit out of place
...imagining things again
comes with the territory i guess...

----------------------------------------------------------------------

i can see the smile upon your face
all at once falling from its place
your image slowly fades from my mind
a symbol of the love you left behind

you pulled me in but you really through me out
you made me sure while filling me with doubt
youre the only one who gave me a chance
and now you send me home
yeah thats romance

why did you have to let me go
when only yesterday you loved me so
none of this is making any sense
was it ever love or only false pretense

you took my dark and turned it into light
you were the only one who made things right
you became my muse when i needed hope
and now you send me home
yeah what a joke

-D

edit: emo remarks...lol

so.. I think I've finally gotten over the fact that I've never actually had a Valentine. & I think I've gotten over the "I HATE VALENTINE'S DAY WITH A PASSION!" phase. Because today I realized that Valentine's Day doesn't have to be just about boyfriends & girlfriends & mushy gifts & what not (even though all that would be VERY nice). Valentine's Day is about giving to others & making someone else feel loved. It's about telling your FRIENDS how much they mean to you & letting them know how special they are.

So, as of 2/14/2006.. Valentine's Day is now my favorite holiday. hah, just because I get to make other people feel special & do nice things for others. Which is what I LOVE to do.

THANK YOU! to all my wonderful friends & cheerleaders for all the sweet Valentines & candy! It was all awesome & you made my Valentine's day great.

Well, I'm going to bed. Once again, thanks guys!
(oh & I tried out for The Wizard of Oz today after school.. mmhmm, it went pretty darn well. I find out Thursday what part I get so, keep your fingers crossed!)

goodnight guys! Happy Valentine's Day!

So today was pretty much the best day ever...and I even had to work!

I love my Valentines!!!!!  Even if I wish I had that one special one...

eliz

lost... once again but this time not for myself if you understand

So it's V-Day and I have no valentine.  That's no goodness.  Makes me lonely but I gave out the really cheap valentines and that made people smile so that was really fun.  I got to do make-up for TNL so that was super awesome.  I'll have pics up later.  I got to put staples in someone's face.  That's awesome.  And I did a witch and rosied someone's cheeks.  That's about all I did with my v-day.  Pretty boring!

V-day is always so depressing.... im ALWAYS alone... i have NEVER had a b/f on V-day....... gahhhhhhhhh why does life suck so hard.... oh well i still got stuff... just not from "him"....
~tRISH

so apparently brian is pregnant.

tell me a story... please? (not about how brian got pregnant. a story that will make me smile)

Pleasant and happy :-)

So today was amazing, granted we lost in basketball, but they are 2nd in state, and we were doing really good, not my point though...
So pretty sure
I got FLOWERS today, yea it was a surprise to me too, I walked in 1st and they were sitting on my desk, and I was SHOCKED, I got them from a guy named Kenny Hoff, he is so cool, he said he wanted to apoligize to me for being a gerk b/c I was saying that I'd see hime at winterfest and he was saying yea right, but yea, I got flowers, and my face turned red and I felt like a little girl, it totally made my day!!!
Well I hope you had a great V-day too.

Yesterday, the band auditioned for a spot on this year's Battle of the Bands at Rocketown and we did really well. We're supposed to know if we're in or not by thursday and though it may come back to bite the largest part of my buttocks, I can't help but be confident.

It seemed like the judges were pretty bored with all the screamo bands that came out to audition and I can't blame them. The one that we saw wasn't horrible, but they were monotonous. The increase of popularity of such bands as Emery and Underoath has appently caused the music of many punk bands to gradually evolve into screamo. Though I like screamo, there's still something to be said for individuality and diversity.

Well, I guess that's it for me. I'll try and post whether or not we made the show once I know for sure.

Until then, check the band myspace:

www.myspace.com/soundpresidential

God bless

Well, everone else is talking about their day, so I guess I will too.

School was basically the same, except I had a test in Electronic Media, which, I am pleased to say, went rather smoothly. Let's just hope my grade is just as smooth. I came home and started straightening and organizing my room. While I did this, I saw that I had two missed calls and a voicemail, all from Brian, wanting to know if I wanted to go to Starbucks. We met up, and I got a venti mocha frappucino with two straws and we sat on the big chairs and had a good conversation. . .

Mostly, we talked about life two years ago. We talked about the strong connection we, along with our other friends constantly felt with God and the ease in which we were able to talk to each other about it. We talked about the past year where it seemed like many people, especially he and I had been hit hard from Satan and struggled to get our closeness with Christ back. Things are constantly changing, and while I know we can't go back to how things were two years ago, we can try to strengthen what we do have, ESPECIALLY our relationship with Christ.

After Starbucks, he drove me to Fazoli's to see some of his friends from the Tuesday Night crew. . . apparently they were celebrating one year of eating there every week. Lol, it was fun.

Now I'm here, needing desperately to study for History, but I think I'm going to skip Theatre Appreciation to do that. I also need to outline a chapter in my English book, 'cause we're having a quiz over it tomorrow, agh!

You know your fat when you set a sandwhich on the end of the bed and you don't feel like reaching to get it...  There is a really nice looking salami sandwhich about 3 feet from me that I can't reach and don't feel like moving that far to grab it...

So... this morning as I was getting ready for work, I heard a knock at my front door. And there on my doorstep sat flowers! Just so you guys know, I have never received flowers from a guy on Valentine's Day before. So this made me extremely happy!






So I went to work, came home and started baking cookies...






yummy!!! and got ready for an evening with the girls. Amy, Rachel, and I dressed up and went to Olive Garden. So everything was going fine... then we got on the interstate and we saw (dun dun dun)






oh yeah. traffic and lots of it. We were trying to get to Olive Garden by 5:30... in attempts to beat the crowd.... So we waited...

 


we took a picture....



didnt make it very far...



so we busted out the microphones and put on some Celine. After a VERY round about way... like 40 minutes out of our way... we made it to Olive Garden... and the wait... dun dun dun... 1 hour and 45 minutes. And you better believe after all that to get there we waited buddy! so...



we took a picture of course. Scoped out a bench and watched it like hawks. And we pounced at it when the people got up. And pretty sure we got A LOT of evil glares. But to them I say..." haha! We got to sit for an hour and a half and you had to stand!!!"







thankfully we got seated... and it was definitely worth the wait!



and we had to take one more photo!


It was a great night! So yay for great friends and of course, yay for love! haha! Hope everyone has a great night!

so...valentines day was not fun at all but i will not complain anymore because i am tired of complaining and i'm sure you all are tired of me ranting about valentines day. (those of you who have to put up with me everyday at school. i am sorry for my complaining)

so i was feeling kinda sad after school and decided to go to my favorite place to waste time...Hastings. i got a Something Corporate cd and now i am feeling a bit happier. (by the way, it's an amazing cd. Leaving Through The Window. you should get it if you don't already have it) well...that was my day...WINTERFEST IS THIS WEEKEND!!!!

AND I AM SO EXCITED!!!

Love is the difficult realization that something other than oneself is real.

All of these fools!

I heard way too many people say Happy ValentiMes day. CAN

THEY NOT READ! i dunno... Its kinda a fun holiday in K-6 but then girls notice your a goober, they get attitudes, and of course I had to get picky.

I was alone this ValentiNes day. I got two candies. I feel happy that I am "loved".

This day makes me feel a little blue, even though I was wearing pink.

I never did understand the whole "I am so lonely, I hate Valentines day" attitude until I got a taste. Everyone has GF/BF 's or at least best friends. I got people who call me a friend, but nobody I could actually just talk to.

Enough with the negative.

I had pizza for dinner, I saw the pink Panthers, my family loves me, I believe in God, and I always have a good place to sleep.

The God part is the most important. Gotta have faith that things will look up...

 - jacob 

Well happy Valentine's Day/ Single Awareness Day, depending on your relationship status.

I wanted to share with each of you a Valentine story you can appreciate regardless of whether or not you're in a relationship. It's about the best Valentine's Day I had before I moved to TN.

A tradition some of my friends and I formed back in TX was to announce ourselves as Valentine Rejects when Valentine's Day rolled around. You see, most all of my friends were single most all the time (we didn't have many guys to choose from at our small private school, and what guys we did have weren't all that special). Yet still there would be some older couples or someone who received a singing telegram from a secret admirer, just so that the whole thing would get rubbed into our face that we were in fact, single. Even if we were ok with it the other 364 days of the year, none of us liked to be a Valentine Reject.

So February 14, 2001, rolled around. And once again, I was a Valentine Reject. Granted, I had chosen at that point in my life to not date and wasn't interested in anyone anways but still... a girl loves love.

So after calling myself a reject all day long, I went to church that night. Yes, Valentine's Day fell on a Wednesday. Now I had all the couples in the youth group to remind me what a reject I was. And what the whole situation worse was that they were selling carnations to raise money for a mission trip! How horrible! Sell flowers to encourage couples that probably shouldn't be dating anyways so that we can go spread the love of God... or at least that was my thought.

Well what a bummer. And then I was surprised. A friend of mine walked up to me that night with a carnation and said, "Here Amy, I bought this for you. Happy Valentine's Day!"

My heart lept with joy! Granted, this was just one of my gal friends, and not some cute, godly man with a glowing auroa that made the angels sing and say, "This is the one!" but someone took the time to think about me!

Wow. And then I realized that night that God always thought about me, loved me, cared about me. He wants to be my Valentine each and every day. He loves me and pursues me and is the only One who can complete me.

Both this year and last year I had a special valentine to share this day with, and I thank God so much for Him. Yet this one thing I still cling to: God is my first love. If no one else loved me He would. And He has blessed me with Garrett and with all my other friends (you guys!) and y'all show me love in another way. Love is an awesome thing, especially when it comes from God and is centered on God. So my friends, whether you're sad about S.A.D. (Single Awareness Day) and so excited about celebrating with your Valentine, know that you are loved by God.