Why?

July 17 2005
why does everything i try seem to fail.

why does it seem like no matter how hard i try i am still on the bottom.

why does it seem like my parents dont care what i think about my own health.

why do i have to voice what i am feeling all the time.

why do i have to be in between both my parents.

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it's hard to write what happened at the doctors office friday. and mom said that if i dont get better then she isn't going to let me do marching band.

it kind of seemed like she was saying it is my fault i got sick. 45 days till i turn 16. and i guess it will be just like a normal birthday since i cant get a car.