i apologize….. i couldn't resist

You Know Your In Band If…
[X]1. if you hear music and start marking time.
[X]2. if you walk in step with the person in front of you.
[X]3. if you try to guess the tempo of your favorite song.
[X]4. if all of your friends are in band.
[X]5. if you don't mind changing clothes on the bus.
[X]6. if you point out key changes and dynamics while listening to the radio.
[X]7. if you like wearing your uniform.
[]8. if every guy/girl you're interested in is in the band.
[]9. if people ask you about your social life and you say, "Oh, you mean my [insert instrument here]?"
[]10. if you consider your drill book a fashion accessory.
[X]11. if you've had a trumpet rub/pic poke.  
[X]12. if you practice your instrument more than you talk to your dog.
[X]13. if being mauled by a drum is a normal part of life.
[]14. if people worry when they see you without your instrument.
[X]15. if "armed guard" means a girl with a pole instead of a guy with a gun.
[X]16. if band camp is FUN.
[X]17. if you respond to "band geek".
[X]18. if someone says the word "set" and you automatically put your head up.
[]19. if you remember flats and sharps more easily than your name.
[X]20. if you dress the lunch line and urge others to do the same.
[X]21. if you're alone and you suffocate because there's no one telling you to breathe.
[X]22. if slides feel normal.
[]23. if your instrument has a name.
[]24. if you remember your instrument's birthday and forget your mom's.
[X]25. if making a line is your biggest accomplishment of the day.
[X]26. if marching backwards no longer reminds you of ballet.
[]27. if you give your instrument a birthday party.
[]28. if you can make brown shoes look white.
[X]29. if your uniform fits.
[X]30. if black feathers become a fashion "do."
[X]31. if you see your section more than you see your family.
[X]32. if everyone wants to kill the other football team...and you want to kill the other []band.
[XXXXX]33. if you think evening practices should last a half-hour longer.
[X]34. if you accidentally call you band director "Dad".
[]35. if you CAN sight-read.
[X]36. if you can put your uniform on in less than 10 minutes.
[]37. if reeds taste good.
[]38. if you think your plume is alive.
[X]39. if marking time is your favorite form of exercise.
[]40. if you have a neck strap/harness tan line.
[]X41. if you subconsciously start practicing with a pencil.
[X]42. if numbers past 8 aren't important.
[XX]43. if you're more opinionated about the Vanguard's rivalry than Bush's politics.
[X]44. if you glide-step through the cafeteria so you don't spill your lunch.
[X]45. if you'd rather practice than read this list.
[X]46. if letters past G aren't important.
[]47. if everybody fights like family.
[]48. if you root for the other football team to lessen the time of your season.
[X]49. if you know everybody else's personal business.
[X]50. if you've practiced so long, the color guard is together.
[X]51. if you have no more secrets.
[X]52. if you don't try to hide the fact that you're in band.
[X]53. if you subconsciously start humming your music.
[X]54. if you know not only your own part, but everyone else's too.
[X]55. if you eat lunch with all of the other band people.
[]56. if you start to eat lunch in the band room.
[X]57. if you can tell who's in the bathroom by looking at their sneakers under the stall.
[X]58. if you resort to humming your band music to fall asleep.
[X]59. if wide open spaces stir up an urge to march your show.
[]60. if you have a pin from every competition you've been to.
[X]61. if you friends that aren't in marching band create a group called "non-marchers".
[]62. if you have 2 instruments--a junky one for marching band and a good one for concert band.
[X]63. if dreams of marching are constantly in your head.
[X]64. if you can't go to the movies on weekends with your friends.
[X]65. if you don't see your parents on the weekends.
[]66. if your free time is spent on homework.
[XXXXXXXX]67. if the drum majors actually start to make sense.
[X]68. if you wear your band shirt in public.
[]69. if you have your friends call you to attention before you walk anywhere.
[]70. if your furniture is dented from banging drumsticks on it.
[]71. if you prefer classical music other than modern music.
[X]72. if the french horn section sounds good.
[X….?]73. if the piccolos play in perfect unison.
[X]74. if the trumpet section's echo seems normal.
[X]75. if you can make this list longer.
[X]76. if you get the jokes on this list.
[]77. if you can mail this to more than 5 people.
[X]78. if you hang out with your instrument section and tell others they aren't invited because they aren't part of your section.
[X]79. if you make comments on the list.
[X]80. if you actually go back to watch your old high school band, even when you have a new band at college.
[X]81. if your siblings are in band too.
[X]82. if you have more guard/band accessories than real accessories.
[X]83. if you're proud to be called a band geek.
[]84. if you can sing the entire piccolo part to "Stars and Stripes Forever."
[X]85. if you discover that when you walk with a large group of friends, you all walk in step and in phase.
[]86. if you've gone out with all members of the opposite sex within the band.
[X]87. if you've tried out every instrument in the band, regardless of who played it last.
[X]88. if you don't laugh when you hear the word "flugelhorn".
[]89. if you've ever used cork grease as chapstick.
[]90. if you cook your eggs with valve oil.
[]91. if you've ever used your trumpet mute to plunge a toilet.
[X]92. if you think "sucking on wood" is not a sexually explicit term.
[]93. if playing in a concert with a new reed is the biggest sin you've committed.
[X]94. if you cringe when you hear the word "oboe."
[X]95. if you know the guys at the music store by name.
[X]96. if you've ever used the excuse, "Sorry, I have band that night."
[X]97. if you've ever been at school for over twelve hours.
[X]98. if, when Saturday night rolls around, you're in the band room.
[]99. if you carry a key to the band room.
[]100. if you've ever slept in the band room.

[X]101. if you see your director more often than your parents.
[X]102. if you refer to inter-section conflicts as "sibling rivalry."
[X]103. if, when you leave when school gets out, your parents ask you why you're home so early.
[X]104. if you polish your instrument more than your car.
[X]105. if you keep pictures of your instruments in different poses in your wallet.
[X]106. if the phrase "stand partner" doesn't evoke sexual images in your mind.
[X]107. if you know the difference between a sousaphone and a tuba.
[X]108. if you've ever used the phrase, "It's okay, I'm in the band."
[]109. if you're "potty pals" with another drummer.
[X]110. if you know the difference between a percussionist and a drummer.
[X]111. if you can sing every drum cadence and don't feel embarrassed while doing it.
[]112. if you think you are cool when you hear a song on the radio and know the quad part to it.
[X]113. if you've gone to every sporting event and never paid for one.
[X]114. if you think the football team provides entertainment for the band concert.
[X]115. if, after enduring one season of marching band, you come back for more.
[X]116. if, whenever you hear a wood block, you snap to attention.
[]117. if you subdivide while talking.
[X]118. if you think two hours in a bus is a short trip.
[]119. if you've ever slipped and fallen in horse poop.
[X]120. if you've been hit by a colorguard flag more than once.
[]121. if you've ever tripped over a three-year-old because you were busy keeping your chin up.
[]122. if you can quote the current prices for mouthpieces.
[X]123. if you've been told to make your instrument sound like a barnyard animal.
[X]124. if you can identify an instrument by its clang when it hits the floor.
[X]125. if you know where every single dent in your instrument came from.
[X]126. if you know good violin players exist.
[X]127. if you think a tuba locker is a good place to sit/sleep.
[X]128. if you're proud of having a band letter on your letterman's jacket.
[X]129. if a band letter is the only letter you have on your letterman's jacket.
[X]130. if your non-band friends (if they exist) think you're in the Mafia.
[]131. if the director has thrown his baton at you more than once.
[X]132. if all the band members know your parents on a first-name basis.
[X]133. if you're not disgusted by pools of spit all over the ground.
[X]134. if you've played the concert B-flat scale in over 90 variations.
[X]135. if first, second, and third position don't have sexual connotations to you.
[X]136. if the word "festival" doesn't necessarily mean "party."
[X]137. if you tell time in measures.
[X]138. if you can tell the difference between a duck call and a saxophone mouthpiece.
[X]139. if you know what sound a cymbal makes when hit against someone's forehead.
[]140. if you've ever gone to Denny's at 2:00 AM, after returning from a concert.
[]141. if you refer to the bassoon as the "bass duck."
[X]142. if your hobbies are: band.
[X]143. if you've ever used your instrument as a machine gun.
[X]144. if you know that all the French horn jokes are true.
[XXXXX]145. if you've ever known anyone who lost a baritone sax.
[]146. if you've ever lost a baritone sax.
[X]147. if you start describing incidents from band parties to your psychiatrist.
[]148. if you've ever rolled down the bleacher steps screaming, 'catch my sax!'
[]149. if all holidays mean you'll be spending the day following a bunch of horses down some street.
[X]150. if your principal quits asking you for a hall pass and instead tells you where to find the rest of the band.

[]151. if you've lost over 20% of your hearing from marching next to a bass drum.
[]152. if your boss never schedules you for a Tuesday, Thursday or Friday night between June and October.
[X]153. if you never worry about finding a seat at a school function.
[X]154. if you find yourself checking to see if the bands in the Macy's Parade are in step.
[]155. if you've been in the Macy's Parade.
[X]156. if your neighbors cry when they see you carrying any small box towards their house.
[X]157. if your parents have ever said, "just tell me how much the whole box is, I'll end up buying them in the end anyway."
[X]158. if you don't remember your boy/girlfriend's birthday but remember everything from the opener of your freshman year.
[X]159. if every time you drive by somewhere, you remember a band competition.
[X]160. if people ask about your social life and you respond: "Oh, you mean marching band?"
[X]161. if you practice your instrument more than talking to your family.
[X]162. if you remember every fast food place around a competition.
[X]163. if you like to polish your shoes.
[XXXXXXXXX]164. if the most popular people you know are the field commanders.
[X]165. if you can't go out on weekends.
[X]166. if you never wear jewelry or fingernail polish--you'd have to take it off for competitions anyway.
[]167. if you know the National Anthem by heart and in more than one key.
[]168. if your instrument is worth more than your car.
[X]169. if half the stuff in your room has the word "band" on it.
[X]170. if anything in your room says "band."
[]171. if you know "Louie, Louie" and have a personal grudge against him.
[X]172. if you and all your friends are easily tagged as "band" when walking down the hall because you are all in a straight line and all in step.
[X]173. if you can think of more than one reason to stop by the band room on your way to class.
[]174. if you can count on one hand your friends that are not in band.
[X]175. if you believe that the band sings better than the choir.
[X]176. if the band does sing better than the choir.
[X]177. if you get emotional thinking about your instrument being in the repair shop.
[X]178. if you are still reading this list.
[X]179. if riding a bus with no heat on your way to a competition is fun.
[X]180. if upon emptying your pockets you can find either a screw driver, drum key, water bottle, valve oil, slide grease, cork grease, etc.
[X]181. if you think parades are "F-U-N!"
[X]182. if you can get anywhere in 12 steps or less.
[X]183. if changing clothes on a bus is a normal occurrence.
[X]184. if you like the smell of your gloves.
[X]185. if you have learned how to wear more than six pairs of pants under your uniform and still not have any wrinkles.  

im the biggest band geek ever ok? so whats it to ya?

much love my friends

- emily