Unremarkable (dead time)
May 07 2006
I'm back home, a fact which I've already discussed but which carries ramifications far greater than you might believe. To you (general you), the reader, your idea of being back home for someone who attended Georgia Institute of Technology is a far more temporary one than I have in mind and know, in fact; but alas, I'm not returning to Atlanta next fall semester. So, you might ask what I plan to do? Ehhh...dead space...
After all these stressful, albeit strange, happenings, the parents are relatively distraught and forthright over my not returning, amongst other things. For a year, I suppose, I will work for monetary rewards and for the rejuvenation of a level of trust between my parents and myself. In fall 2007, Lee? I'm not sure at this point. As my mother remarked, "We're just taking this one day at a time." That we may be, but I feel a sense of other depression creeping onto the scene because of it.
While you may not care (hell, sometimes I don't) about my future, I would be remissed in most cases not to. Honestly, though, I have no idea what to do in all this dead space. It's like nothing's going to happen for about a year of my life: I'll be out of phase with most people I know. Of course, I basically am already. I've yet to gradiate myself back into the FWC crowd, especially since I want to avoid any other social infractions (with one person in particular). My time with Turning Point is lackluster at best, and the choices for a man around here, at least to me, appear quite slim (that being a woman, as it should be).
For all this confusing angst-filled pablum, I'm probably not being very understandable. I feel, in many ways, like everyone else is continuing on without me, while I'm stuck at Park Place paying for my bad decisions. What am I supposed to be doing in the meantime? Work only goes so far. It's like I'm dead without actually being dead--or, I guess, dead to everyone I know in a sense. People carrying on their lives, I stand while people rush around me in a blur of business. I'm stuck with the boredom and emptiness I've had yet to experience until now, and I figure out a way to solve it...
After all these stressful, albeit strange, happenings, the parents are relatively distraught and forthright over my not returning, amongst other things. For a year, I suppose, I will work for monetary rewards and for the rejuvenation of a level of trust between my parents and myself. In fall 2007, Lee? I'm not sure at this point. As my mother remarked, "We're just taking this one day at a time." That we may be, but I feel a sense of other depression creeping onto the scene because of it.
While you may not care (hell, sometimes I don't) about my future, I would be remissed in most cases not to. Honestly, though, I have no idea what to do in all this dead space. It's like nothing's going to happen for about a year of my life: I'll be out of phase with most people I know. Of course, I basically am already. I've yet to gradiate myself back into the FWC crowd, especially since I want to avoid any other social infractions (with one person in particular). My time with Turning Point is lackluster at best, and the choices for a man around here, at least to me, appear quite slim (that being a woman, as it should be).
For all this confusing angst-filled pablum, I'm probably not being very understandable. I feel, in many ways, like everyone else is continuing on without me, while I'm stuck at Park Place paying for my bad decisions. What am I supposed to be doing in the meantime? Work only goes so far. It's like I'm dead without actually being dead--or, I guess, dead to everyone I know in a sense. People carrying on their lives, I stand while people rush around me in a blur of business. I'm stuck with the boredom and emptiness I've had yet to experience until now, and I figure out a way to solve it...
Josh Morgan
May 08 2006
I visited FWC this weekend and felt very... forgotten. It's strange to hear things like "who is that?" and "oh, that's Paul's brother. He doesn't really go here." I also know what you mean by stalling out. Having moved to Cookeville, all but 2 friends (one being Liz) are in my Major Classes. Now, I'll be working for a year and most will graduate. I'll have to come back and join groups made up of students I don't know. Lately, I keep repeating the words "I struggle with forward motion."
Randy Rodden
May 08 2006
I definetly feel you on the lack of choices category. Though there are some, not many but some, good(which I use verrrry loosly) Christian( which I use loosly as well) girls that I have close to my surrounding, if I ever like one of them, they seem to find some minor thing to nit pick about. If it were one of my major flaws, and it's not like they're hard to find, I would be completely satisfied. But no, they have to pick some crapy little thing. Also on the topic of schooling, that hits very close to home. Although our problems seem to be the exact opposite. You did very well in high school and didn't really excell at Georgia Tech. While me obtaining a horrible GPA at the moment, can't see myself doing badly in college. I feel that when I'm out on my own, as I take on more responsibilities, I need to actually be responsible. But about what Josh said, I feel the exact same way....Each time I feel that I am on the right track, I ALWAYS go back to my old bad habbits! While some are minor and some are larger, they are all bad habbits and I need to get rid of them! THIS IS THE LONGEST COMMENT I HAVE EVER LEFT SOMEONE!!!
