I had several things I thought I would say today when I got home, but I've forgotten most of those things.  Most of those anyway have nothing to do with what I want to say.  Really, though, I don't know what I want to say, and quite frankly, I don't know why I'm alive--not necessarily in the sorrowful, "I want to end it all now" sense of that statement, but moreso is that I want to find out why I'm alive.
Honestly, I find myself at odds with religion time and time again, and for you people who always like to tote the idea that religion and faith (or a relationship with God), the principles are, in the practical sense, inextricable.  (God still continues to intrigue me.)  First, between eternal hellfire and eternity with all of America's Christians, the eternal hellfire seems rather attractive.  Beyond the jokes though, I think Christianity lacks the "umph" it used to have.  I think Kim Klaudt described it well, "Signs and wonders will follow you, not you should follow signs and wonders."  I just think the power available is being forsaken, even in Pentecostal circles.  Again, these are reasons for my aversion to religion, so don't get on here and preach at me about how that's not an excuse and all that shit because that's not what I'm arguing here.  The common excuse is that only certain people are prepared for such power.  Really?  That's why so many devout believers don't make use of it?  Well, maybe the dumbfucks are right.  Maybe, modern Christianity is stagnant in the wake of its own human influence.