why cont.

June 15 2005
i suppose i must explain my outburst on the last post. i'm sick of caring for things or people that don't appreciate my caringness(??). i'm sick of liking people when i should know that there's no hope of them ever liking me back. i'm tired of working myself up over little things or when i get really excited about something potentially happening and then getting really bummed out when it doesn't.

the worst part of it is, i shouldn't like him as much as i do....

In the life of Kaylei...

June 15 2005
Hello again! Well, I don't have really that much to say.
My life is getting kind of boring lately since school has been out. But not for long, thank goodness.
I'm going to NYC with the family in about a week, so that should be awesome. Also,I've got Advance at Lipscomb coming up in a month. I can't wait to finally get registered for college! aaah, I'm so excited!!!!

I've been reading this book "The Power of Positive Thinking" and it's been helping me a lot. Sometimes I have the worst attitude about things and I'll admit it.
But I see it's all so pointless to worry and complain. So from now on I'm going to be a happy, optimistic person. And if you see me doing so otherwise, please tell me so I'll stop, lol. Well, I love you all and hope you have a great week!

Hijinks Galore

June 15 2005
Shall soon be collaborating with 6'1" weight-lifting Jeff about what to do to our resident ingrate as mentioned in the previous post.

Professor Wenz is now threatening to "punch me to the moon." Oh well -- he's recovering from pneumonia, he can't do anything. *Grins*

That was horrible of me.

We'll ignore that.

Did you know that the dorms here LOCK at 10:00 [i.e. curfew]? To the point that your swipey card won't even open the door to the stairwell?? Let me explain....

So I'm sitting in the computer lab [yes, again -- lay off, it's my one link to society] and I see that well, goshdarnit, it's 9:59! Time to rush back to dear old [literally] Ellington Hall dormitories. On the way I meet up with Brent and Rachel, and we debate the best way inside the building without getting caught. Being much experienced in this venue by now, I immediately advise against going in the front door near the basement, as it was positively teeming with councillors and directors the LAST time we tried to sneak in past curfew. The general consensus became that if we could just get into the stairwell, we can say we've been there the entire time. Such a plan! While we're standing outside, revelling in our genius, the first floor door inside opens up, and out walks Craig [councillor who caught us tardy people the last time around]. Hide around the corner -- he'll never look there! Oh, if only.... Rachel and I get caught [Brent was off hiding in a bush, I think. Grr on him]. The door to the stairwell is shut, so I bust out my ID card to swipe it and grant us access to the hallowed halls of habitation. Or so I thought. *Swipe* Still locked. *Swipe* Hmmm. *Swipe*........ *Swipe*.... *Swipe* Try another card! *Swipeswipeswipe* *Rotate barcode* *Swipeswipeswipe* *Repeat* *Try Rachel's card* *And again* THEY LOCK THE DOORS AFTER 10:00?!?!! WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?!! Noooooo! Wait! Deliverance! There's a door in the BACK that leads to the basement [I, with my infinite foresight to rule-breaking, had taken care to notice it casually enough that afternoon] -- we'll go there, into the basement group room where our compatriots are probably sitting around watching Donnie Darko, and be safe! *Hums Mission:Impossible theme* Yes, everything was going our way. The door was unlocked, we wended our way until there was only one door between us and the basement-group-room. The one door down there that was locked. "It's probably like every other door in this building, and there's a lever on the other side that will unlock it. I can see Frank through the peephole. Let's pound on the door and get them to let us in." * Bangbangbangbangbang* Pretty sure we scared a few of them silly, which is always great fun. Well, if it had been our intent, anyway. We were a bit more determined to infiltrate unnoticed. Yes, it's probably like every other door in this dorm.... Which means, of course, that it definitely was NOT. Brent tries his key, which fits but does not turn. Curses. We'll have to use the conventional back door. Do the windows open? Yes, yes they do. From the INSIDE. And nobody inside is either willing or able to aid us. Sigh. So we sneak in through the conventional back door, into the basement door, and just when I round the corner and am almost safe beneath ground level, who do I see? Craig! "Hey Late Girl!" "Ahhhhh! *Runs*" Which is not suspicious at all, as you know.

But it was a hilarious adventure nonetheless, probably because it resembled movie incidences a bit too much.

So yes, do not try to get in at 10:02. This is impossible.

And whatever you do, do NOT start thinking about Eddie Izzard's "Babies on spikes! Taste of chicken! Rack of baby!" in your ethics class when Dr. Brown decides to use baby torture as an example. It is incredibly hard to keep a straight face, which is directly proportionate to how close to the front you are seated. Naturally, I'm front and centre. Most awkward. It does not hold well to burst into laughter in your ETHICS course of all places every time somebody says "baby torture." Thankfully, that was avoided, however narrowly.

And then we broke the in-the-room curfew by an hour duct-taping everything in sight. Well, almost everything. Taped Christina [our councillor] into her room a few times [ which resulted in us being chased down hallways and into rooms by handfuls of duct tape -- she was amused by the whole fiasco, though, which is always incredibly good fortune], taped off a hallway, returned a girl's book by taping it to the door, then knocking and running away, only to have her room mate come out, ask if we were bored, and tell us she wasn't there in the first place. And then going to get her. Triumph!! And the the piece de resistance -- a body outline!! Yesssss! I got to be the body. *Happy Dance* Arrows pointing to the crime scene were also emblazoned onto the floor. Unfortunately, the janitors removed our artwork this morning. Noooooo! Our masterpiece!! I feel kind of guilty they cleaned it up, though. We were so going to do it. Next time we're making signs for them. And bringing caution tape. And it's going to be awesome. There's much more, but it's not as interesting [which of course is assuming that ANY of this is] and would take too much space. Then this morning, as Christina kept foiling out attempts to effectively block her in, we left a welcome mat outside her door of duct tape -- sticky side up. *Sigh of Contented Bliss* It was havoc well-wrought. I'm going to like this whole dorm-life/college concept when it rolls around next fall. ;D

I wonder what could be accomplished between now and dinner.... Buahahaha.

I Just Slept 12 Hours....

June 15 2005
yeah, that has nothing to do with the entry. pretty much its just me being really excited, and kind of freaked out at the same time. last night caitlin said that its weird, because next year we are going to be juniors. ok, holy crap, when did that happen? juniors? wow. i mean, part of me is extremely excited, because that means 2 more years before i get out of this hell hole. but then again, i have always been that person that doesn't want to grow up. so i dont know what im going to feel by the end of next year, but high school's going by way too fast.

i dunno, i will leave you with a picture of chicago, freshman year...

its kind of blurry, but thats because i was on the ferris wheel screaming obscenities, scared out of my mind....



photo from Ed_The_Angry_Jew

uh...........

June 15 2005
is this where im supposed to be writing, thatd be cool.............im done

Untitled

June 15 2005
Hey i have no clue what this is but yeah!
Paige

i hate lazy.

June 15 2005
i am the laziest person in the world during the summer time.

and i hate it.

not summer time but being lazy.
i have even resorted to washing my laundry and cleaning the entire house.

next time you see me i might be insane....

they're bulding a pool though, so pool party at lauren's house!

HAPPY DAYS

June 15 2005
im watchin happy days and its a great show its so happy i dont know why but im quite bubbly lol so yesterday we went to the airport and picked up heather and teresa so ya thats about it love ya -milly

I'm off. . .

June 15 2005
I'm leaving for Impact in about twenty minutes. I'll be at Lipscomb until June 25th. My birthday is soon after; hopefully I'll come up with SOMETHING to do, because I'm not having another party here, lol. Renfroe and I about went crazy last year.

I love you all. Be safe.

Kentucky Kingdom

June 15 2005
Hey

Today I went to kentucky kingdom and got my pass. With my ugly picture on it. Why do they have to do black and white? I had fun with Mandy and Kelly. I stayed with them the whole 7 hours there. We road so mandy rides and did the water park. I road the new ride there ( in the water park ) forgot the name lol.

Well really tired and I got vbs today so later,

Natalie

Something New

June 15 2005
So I guess I followed the trend and got one of these things. They're cool I guess. And not as open as Xanga which is good. I'll probably update every-so-often. So I guess this is the beginning to this whole thing...

Today was partly good and partly sure hell.
Went riding around with Justin and soon got bored to death. Only saw Sean for roughly five minutes then Justin wanted to follow a girl who he is still head over heels for. Annoyed the hell out of me. Ended up walking almost half a mile in the woods so he could find a place to fish and spy on his eye candy. I was really mad and it was scorching out there so I stomped back to the truck. I was itching all over from the woods and found a tick on my leg. Bleck. Got home and finally cooled down.

I hadn't slept in over 26 hours so Sean finally convinced me to go to bed. Slept from seven to around midnight. Not that bad. I'll probably go back to sleep soon since my sister isn't awake.

Only real good thing that I accomplished today, besides seeing Sean, was probably getting an application for Kroger. I doubt I'll fill it out though. I really need a job, but:
A) I really don't like working around lots of people.
B) I want to get a job I actually like, not a job that bores me for hours on end.
But I guess I'm going to have to forget my stubborness and apply anyways. Bleh.

Well, Kirk is calling. I'll update sometime soon. Ciao.

Inverted World

June 15 2005
Heres a poem I wrote. Enjoy.

Inverted World

Lonely eyes see lonely faces
creating lonely tears, filling empty spaces
An empty space of an inverted world
where demons shiver, and angels burn
Contradictions fluorish, order is chaotic;
Rhyme loses reason, there exists no logic.
It's in ourselves, this world is found
When our normal existance is drowned
by guilt, by loneliness, or by tears
from the pain caused by our uncontrollable fears
of this cold and barren world
from which our stories are unfurled.
-Daniel Austin 2005


By the way, as for all this religious debate that has been sparked because anyone thought that my group was attacking Christians, I'm done with it. That group did not attack Christians, I love Christianity, and most of my friends and family are Christians. That group is about God's word being twisted in ALL religions. About the word of Jesus being twisted to spawn hatred, about the word of Muhammad being twisted to spawn hatred.. its about how God in every fascet is changed by radicals for evil. But everyone has to jump on me because they're weak faith is bothered by some stranger that seems to disagree with them. Please no one bug me about it, because currently I still have respect for everyone, even those who have caused me frustration about this very subject.

That's all I have to say about the subject. I should think that anyone should feel lucky that I even grace this entry with a explaination.. it isn't deserved or neccessary.. however I can let go of my pride and tell you all that I'm sorry if I offended anyone, because it wasn't my intentions. Now leave me be.

Back to that...

June 14 2005


photo from ValPal8605

This was me sophomore year. Appearance wise not too much has changed. But so much more has changed other than that... Things were so much more simple then. Everyone still had their innocence, and if they didnt no one knew about it. Bowling on a Friday night with your best friend was as good as it got. You didnt feel the need for "other things" when you were hanging out. I wish we all could go back to that.

man...

June 14 2005
today really sucked...

Untitled

June 14 2005
howdy!..yeah...well..i saw this on someone's xanga and i thought it looked pretty cool...so here it is!

why!?

June 14 2005
why did i even care??

Untitled

June 14 2005
Up and down, back and forth, my emotions are pulled in every direction.

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.

I know not what I'm doing...or maybe I do. This is either the best or the worst I have felt; a new beginning, but an end that I refuse to face. Nothing is right, nothing is fair, least of all my own conflicting thoughts.

I've made countless friends, but most of them I can forget and leave as memories; at least, I'd like to think so. I did the same before, why not again?

It's you and me
And all of the people
And I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you


Because this time is different; I've never felt closer to these people, and now is the time I have to stop, step back, and reassess the situation. These people have rebuilt my broken self esteem, reaffirmed my faith, and, in some severe cases, made me believe that there's someone out there that's close to me that I think is "the one". But that's just tunnel vision, I believe, and I've already had one case of that in four years.

My head is giving me life and death
But I can't choose


So what do I tell these people? "Hey, it's been fun, but I've got to leave and you can't do anything, sorry."? That's horrible, that's something I'd wish on nobody and their friends, but the seemingly unescapeable situation. It's worse, because so many of them are going off and having vacations, and they're missing even that.

What's a hopeless romantic to do?

YO!

June 14 2005
hey, just thought i'd start one of these things. Don't think i'll be talking about much though. so watever...

friends

June 14 2005
so i'm gonna ask to be people's friends. i'm especially going to ask a whole bunch of people i don't know and see what happens. maybe by the end of the week i'll have a mass amount of new buddies

A day by day struggle

June 14 2005
Well, Im about to give up on all of my other sites because all people can do is harrass me online. I get so tired of it. Why cant people just grow up? Why is eveyone so mean?

I dont understand it. And most of them claim to be Christians. Is that what the world of the Christian faith is coming to? A bunch of people claiming to be faithful to God yet they harrass other people. I dont understand. I just think that isn't fair to the rest of us who really are god loving christains. I mean I have had times when I haven't been totally faithful to God but at least I have tried to change my ways. I think I might actually be getting somewhere.

I hope that you all can sympathize with this and I hope that you agree with me.

Photo From dana_the_best

June 14 2005


photo from dana_the_best
You can support the One Campaign, also, by purchasing a One band, like that of the livestrong. They are $1 each and can be purchased on the One Campaign site. You don't have to purchase to support though. Right now you can go sign the One Declaration and letter to be sent to good 'ol President Bush. Check it out!
-Dana :)

I took cutie for a ride in my death cab.....

June 14 2005
Fun Fun a new website; heeeheee

Life is getting better. Still cant deal with all this Alex shit but hopefully itll be over soon. Im just glad I have my friends

oops

June 14 2005
i just accidentally deleted all my old posts. maybe the last one was a good idea. i dont know. anyways hopefully things are getting better.


youve got to admit its getting better// a little better all the time

Warning: Really Long Post, With Angry Teeth-Gnashing at the End.

June 14 2005
Name: Kelly Sullivan, Supreme Ruler of All She Surveys
Birthday: November 8 – 4 months, 24 days! I think. That involves numbers, though, so no promises.
Birthplace: Murfreesboro, a veritable metropolis.
Current Location: Fourth seat from the right, second table, computer lab, Andy Holt Humanities Building, Martin, Tennessee
Eye Color: Beautimous blue.
Hair Color: Brown. With relatively out-grown highlights. Bleach… *Twitch*
Height: 5’ 7” in the morning, when I stand up really-really straight! But I think I’m probably average around 5’ 6” during the day… Sigh…
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right.
Your Heritage: Geeze… Native American, Irish, Welsh, English [no Scottish, though!] German/Prussian, Czech, Polish. And we’re just going to assume that somewhere somehow down the line an ancestor was French. Whether that’s actually true or not is irrelevant. *Winks*
The Shoes You Wore Today: Old Navy flip-flops.
Your Weakness: Foreign accents and good hair. And insanity.
Your Fears: Spiders and thunderstorms. And death. Big fear of the death thing. Oh, and extremist takeover, whether that’s merely in our political system or another culture over-running us.
Your Perfect Pizza: Amy’s Vegan Pizza, available at Kroger.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Dual-enrollment. It’s on the rocks right now. Oh, and graduating would be nice.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: “Lol,” “lmao,” “heh,” “hehe” and other remarks
Thoughts First Waking Up: I really, REALLY don’t want to get out of bed… Did we finish the philosophy work??
Your Best Physical Feature: My feet in heels.
Your Bedtime: 12:00, give or take.
Your Most Missed Memory: When I was little, and nothing was impossible or complicated. And Dad seemed to be home more often.
Pepsi or Coke: Eh, neither.
MacDonald's or Burger King: Ahhhhh!
Single or Group Dates: Single.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Either.
Chocolate or Vanilla: CHOCOLATE! *Salivates*
Cappuccino or Coffee: Cappuccino.
Do you Smoke: Jamais [never].
Do you Swear: Fuck no.
Do you Sing: In the car, or in the shower if nobody else is in the house, lol.
Do you Shower Daily: Yes.
Have you Been in Love: Nope.
Do you want to go to College: If I don’t, my guidance councilor tells me I’ll die old, alone, and impoverished.
Do you want to get Married: It might be nice. But it’s not like I’d settle down with just anyone because it’s nice.
Do you believe in yourself: Sometimes.
Do you get Motion Sickness: Nope. I read, write, AND draw on cars and planes alike!
Are you a Health Freak: Mentally, yes. But it still doesn’t stop me from snarfing two slices of greasy pizza.
Do you get along with your Parents: Yes, actually. We hit a rough spot last year, but everything has smoothed out. Just don’t discuss politics or religion and you’re golden.
Do you like Thunderstorms: *Whimpers*
Do you play an Instrument: The flute.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Not in the past month, no.
In the past month have you Smoked: Never.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Does caffeine count??
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Nahh, not in the past... erm… 8 months, actually, lol!
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Nope.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Nope-nope.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Nope.
In the past month have you been on Stage: Yeppers!
In the past month have you been Dumped: Nope!
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Nope.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Nope.
Ever been Drunk: Nope.
Ever been called a Tease: Gr.
Ever been Beaten up: Nope.
Ever Shoplifted: Nope.
How do you want to Die: I’d really rather not. It goes back to that whole “fears” thing, you know? But if I absolutely had to, then in a blaze of heroic glory [so long as the maddeningly deadly heroic feat is pulled off, anyway. It would be so disappointing otherwise.]
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Millionaire, for obvious reasons. But I’ll settle for President/actress/usher at l’Opera Garnier.
What country would you most like to Visit: DUH. FRANCE.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Any.
Favourite Hair Color: Any.
Short or Long Hair: Longer than usual.
Height: Not picky.
Weight: Proportional.
Best Clothing Style: I’m just happy if they’re clothed.
Number of Drugs I have taken: Caffeine?
Number of CDs I own: God only knows…
Number of Piercings: Two – one per ear.
Number of Tattoos: None. Yet.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: I’m not really sure…

Oh wait. This one kid [in Governor's School for Agriculture -- go figure] was bragging about all these horrible things he did to a fellow boy scout on a camping trip when they learned he was gay. His ass is MINE. I can't believe people like that are actually stalking the earth! It's one thing to read about it in the news, but to encounter a creature like that in a program that is disgustingly selective... It makes you doubt your faith in humanity as a whole. Seriously, this kid better be holding on to his kneecaps, because seventy people are after them to hang over their respective mantlepieces. Not even Disney could soothe me [or taking shoes out of the closet in order to throw them back in], I was that pissed off. And I wasn't even there! I had to hear it from the people who were talking to this pathetic excuse of a life-form. He's getting called out. Hope he's at dinner tonight [more public] [agriculture kids and humanities kids are on a slightly different schedule, so you never can tell]. And he was BRAGGING about it, laughing, calm!! He's able to sleep at night after doing such a deed! He's not escaping on July 8 unscathed, I can tell you that now. Mum tried to council me not to do anything because there might be retaliation, but if nobody did anything out of fear of retaliation, where would we be? Huh?? Where would we be? It's not my fight, I realise this, but I really don't care. No one else seems to want to do it.

*Sharpens tongue in preparation for battle*

I'm so incredibly outraged it's nowhere near remotely funny.

....Just had to get that out of my system.

I am calm. I am peaceful. I am calm. I am peaceful. I am calm....

*Goes off to replay "March of the Toreadors"*

The Verdict Is - Not Guilty!!! *Gasp from the audience*

June 14 2005
yep, biotch, you found me.

wacko jacko is not guilty.

the end.

Hello

June 14 2005
how's everyone doing? I hope good. There's not too much goin' on right now. I've been pretty bored lately. well, guess that's it for me!
Later! God bless!

-Tiffunny

1 Timothy (not peter)

June 14 2005
1 timothy 3:1-5
Here is a trustworthy saying: If anyone sets his heart on being an overseer, he desires a noble task. Not the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkeness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect.

kinda old fashioned I know. but our church is in the process of finding new elders, and this has been been brought to my attention that this is what you NEED in a husband, not just what you WANT.

I was just listening to my Launchcast player, and guess what happened to come on?? One More Chance by Michael Jackson. :P

Hoover Paint

June 14 2005
I hate my job. All of you people who complain about your job being so hard need to shut up... mine is worse. All I do all day is pick up 30 pound barrels of paint and stack them 4 high. Now I dont know about you, but I think that is much worse than serving people chicken at KFC. And the worse part is that my hours are 12 untill 4. You might say that im lucky that i get to sleep in untill 10 or so, but really, I'd rather get up at 7 and be there at 9 and work untill 1 so I could have the rest of my day free. My hours now cut my day in half... and I don't like.

I guess I'm lucky to have a job though. At least I make some money instead of being broke all the time.

Not too much to talk about right now. I guess I'll let you kids go.

Later
Brett

Road Trips and Late night swimming!!`

June 14 2005
Man, yesterday was the ultimate in summerness (yes made that word up and theres nothing you can do about it!). I went on a mini road trip to the lovely city of McMinville with Kyle and Danny for Kyle to go to court for the ticket he recieved when we were up at the cabin! Hanging out with those two is always fun!
Then for supper I went out to LaSiesta (in my top 5 fav. restaurants) for supper with Sarah and David. I love those guys!! Sarah is my pepper, she spices up my life, but sometimes makes me sneeze!!
After that we (kyle, valerie, sarah, danny) decided we wanted to go swimming. So we go over to my aunts house and swim/warm tub (the hot tub wasnt very hott lol) till around 10, when we proceeded back to my house to watch Ladder 49 because they are wanting to be volunteer firefighters and me and sarah wanted them to see how dangerous it is!
See what I mean about the awesomeness of summer!!! ok thats the last insanely long entry about nothing that I will ever write...

:)

June 14 2005
So many things are becomming evident in my life. . . wow. Things are different. I feel different. But it's all good. Mmm. I'm listening to Jack Johnson, I've got a can of ravioli for lunch, and I tomorrow, I leave for Impact to do something so completely different that I have ever done. I am excited. I've started The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, and I'm liking it a lot. I may run to Hastings later on to grab another book for my entertainment.

Mmm, I bought Nicholas Spark's Message in a Bottle on a whim. I'm not starting it until I finish Sisterhood, and I've still gotta read the book we're "expected" to read for school.

Untitled

June 13 2005
Well, my first entry on another one of these site things. im glad im not as addicted as my sister.

black and white

June 13 2005
i got smoe really expensive black and white today it was sad i just wantd something better than the walmart b&w so i went to click! and i got a roll of tmax 36 exp. for 6 bucks i hope they turn out well i cants wait to go to the new house in minnesota ah only 2 more weeks

Photo From sarah

June 13 2005


photo from sarah

mwahaha!

Hold On Hope

June 13 2005
Everybody's got a hold on hope,
It's the last thing that's holding me

iPod Photo

June 13 2005
My newest toy...



photo from ben

::ben

Untitled

June 13 2005
kayla is the best...she made me this....common i need some freinds...join!! haha...well i gotta go do some stuff for swimming gotta go
steven

What kind of Woman I Want to Be

June 13 2005
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."1 Peter 3:3-4

"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."
Proverbs 31: 29-30

I want to be that kind of a woman described in those two verses. I was reading Song of Songs and I was just thinking how the Shulamite woman did have a strong passion for her true love but she knew that she didn't need a guy to be happy, and that's what attracted her mate to her. She says "Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you....do not arouse or awaken love untill it so desires." Song of Songs 2:7. She knew that having love for God first is what it's really all about, and then God will bless you with a truly wonderful earthly romance. If we focus on becoming more christlike then our inner beauty will outshine everything. Just a thought for the day, lol.
Hope you all have a blest day!

-Kaylei :)

Hi

June 13 2005
I think I'm going to make this a blog and a
place where I put my neat devo's up.

Well let me tell you more about me. I am a keeper at my high school. I am in some great classes and can't wait for school to start back again. I have 3 little brothers. I enjoy spending time with God and my friends.

Well longer later
Goalichik

song-perfect situation by weezer....o and b is for brutus

June 13 2005
What's the deal
With my brain?
Why am I so obviously insane?
In a perfect situation
I let love down the drain
There's the pitch
Slow and straight
All I have to do is swing and I'm a hero
But I'm a zero

Hungry nights
Once again
Now it's getting unbelievable
'Cause I could not have it better
But I just can't get no play
From the girls
All around
As they search the night for someone to hold onto
And just pass through

Singin oh-oh,
oh-oh, ohhhh-hoooo

Singin oh-oh,
oh-oh, ohhhh-hoooo

Get your hands
Off the girl
Can't you see that she belongs to me?
And I don't appreciate this
Excess company
Though I can't
Satisfy
All the needs she has and so she starts to wander
Can you blame her?

Singin oh-oh,
oh-oh, ohhhh-hoooo

Singin oh-oh,
oh-oh, ohhhh-hoooo

Tell me there's a logic out there
Leading me to better prepare
For the day that something really special might come
Tell me there's some hope for me
I don't wanna be lonely
For the rest of my days on the earth

Oh-oh,
oh-oh, ohhhh-hoooo

Singin oh-oh,
oh-oh, ohhhh-hoooo

Singin oh-ohhhh...
------
anyway my week has been tuff and its only monday cuz my nephew is commin and to tell u the truth hes evil. so i gotta deal with that but i know with God and the power of music ill make it

Untitled

June 13 2005
aw, screw it. Thought this whole phusebox thing would work, but xanga's still my outlet.

The One Campaign

June 13 2005
This is a campaign endorsed by peoples such as Brad Pitt that I feel very strongly about. This campaign was set up by Americans for Americans to help fight global AIDS and extreme poverty. You can go to the website and show your support, for free, by signing the Declaration. When I have a career I will be very lucky if it will concern something along these lines. For I want to be a peacekeeping officer in the UN. I have always wanted to live/work in African nations and do mission type work. I want to help improve the lives of people who have literally nothing. Even if it lasts for just a lifetime, I wanna know that I made a difference. Together we can work to half the amount of poverty by the next decade! Please, if this is something that you want to help stop, go to http://www.one.org and make a difference!

-Dana

What's up all!!!

June 13 2005
well guys i had an awesome weekend.me and my parents went to the lake and had a total blast yeah pretty sure im sore from all the tubing i did but it was all worth it.then today i had to babysit which is awesome and you know what we did we went swimming and it was awesome!!!!yeah so life is pretty awesome and cool and all that stuff right now and i love it.hey if anyone gets bored anytimes this week give me a call on my cell(545-6082)and we will do something for sure.
Well I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!
GOD BLESS!!!
Leah

What's up!

June 13 2005
Hello Friends. I just got done watching the Jackson case resultes. I really though that he was guilty. I still think so. He's had some good albums but he's a weird one, haha. So what have you guys been up to in the lately. I'm in Louisivlle, KY. This is where I feel most at home, even though you guys are still back in Murfreesboro....
Let's see.... what can I say?... I saw star wars with cameron and was that your girlfriend? cause I don't think I've ever met her. She seemed nice though. I really liked the movie and am made that it has taken me this long to get into it, haha. I wanna watch them all and the go see the III one again. I also need to change my profile pic, lol. But I have been having trouble up loading it but maybe it will work on this comp.
My dog sugar is doing better I think. She is having surgery today on something that is lodged in her intestines. And her liver should repair itself on its own so I'm just hopeing for the best. Suger is 11 and I am 15 so we have been through alot together. Well...... I should be coming back on the 16th of July, just in time for Lauren, hehe, and then we leave for Texas on the 24th for about 2 weeks. So we have to deffinatly do something in that short span of time. Welp.... that's about all I have to say. Also chack my dana_the_best xanga site for any up dates on my boring life, lol. Bye guys!
-Dana

Gweniouds

June 13 2005
Today @ the store I was all like," Hey look, Beck's newish CD, I wish I had monies." and my parents were all like,"That's wut u get Sucka." and Dom Sheddon was all like,"Curses! MJ got away again!"

Monday, Monday....

June 13 2005
Elizabeth and I stayed up until 2:00 AM the night before our map test today (the cities of which ate my face) scarfing chocolate and discussing the evils of men. It was fantastic.

You should all try it sometime.

Is it neccessarily sad and pathetic that I've already come up with two-three character ideas for faire next year? And am sketching costumes in geography instead of taking notes on glacier movement?? I've decided I may want to portray a noblewoman next year -- Elizabeth Sydenham, second wife [or at least on her way to it] of Sir Frances Drake. I can lay more claim to it than anyone, because somehow we're distantly related. *Waves battle flag of blood relations* And then I get to play with pretty fabrics and shiny stuff, and swear my way through making a standing ruff. .... The other is Grace O'Malley, Irish pirate-ish-trader-like thing-extraordinaire, who is just badass in her own right. And a chimney sweep: Nicole Ashe. Just because I think going around all sooty and grimy with a blackened broom over one shoulder would be fun.

I got the Killers CD at Wal-Mart yesterday. We put "Mr. Brightside" on repeat while studying. It's an awesome disc. *Happy*

Tennessee weather is so schizo. Yesterday it was pouring buckets on us, and now the weather gods are all sunshiney and benign. *Shakes fist at the heavens* *Is promptly fried for such temerity* *Sigh* That never works....

Ooh! I might be returning to civilisation for a day or two! Depending on if I decide to enact the right of "midterm break" that half the dormitory world will be away on. Fun. I can do laundy, then. I think I have enough clothing to last me the week.... *Grins*

...today.

June 13 2005
Today is the first day since summer started that I have been alone. I have worked 8- 5 every weekday, and at night and on the weekends everyone is at the house. Im not really complaining, because i always have something to do, but everyone NEEDs to be alone once in a while. And I really need to work on my artwork before school starts. When people are around I cannot concentrate, so I have really been neglecting it lately. Not a good thing when Im sapposed to be preparing for art school. Im getting scared that I will fall behind. I get the next two weeks off, so hopefully I will get a few days to relax and get stuff done.
Im starting to freak out a little about moving to New York. I know that God has so much planned for me up there, and all I want to do is be available for Him to use me. BUT, the fact that I am leaving everything I know is starting to become more and more real. Yet, I am sure that everyone feels this way at some point or another. God is so good and I know He will take care of me. When has he not?
BTW- I really like phusebox because only one person I know is going to read this. super.

*hums pink panther theme*

June 13 2005
sometimes I wish i could help others realize stuff.

vague huh?

well I just had a wonderful weekend. I hope this week is that good.

still vague....

hmm...i love practicing my instruments a lot lately.

now that's just random...

I feel like a gap in my life has been filled. but not completely filled. like it's been covered with saran wrap. it could easily break if it goes wrong, but if it's what I hope for, it could be filled for the rest of my life. that just came to me. sorry, it's still kinda vague. I'm obviously in a vague mood. now I'm going to shower. I said "vague" 4 times. that one makes 5. again with the randomness. God Bless.

11 Days

June 13 2005
Eleven days until the big 18. Absolutely cannot wait...

lightning is like hotness in a bag

June 13 2005
last night at like 11 i was sitting outside watching the lightning storm is was so beautiful then it started to rain so i had to go inside and by the time i was inside it was pouring it was so pretty.........mmmm it was amazing

helllo

June 13 2005
hannah is at camp right now & this is her big sister updating for him...i will miss her so much & i hope she has an awesome time!!

in His name
Kayla! (for her awesome little sister hannah)

hello

June 13 2005
me like phusebox....

been thinking

June 13 2005
lately i've been thinking about what i want in a boyfriend. there's something in the bible, i think in 1 Peter. it's a description of what an elder or deacon should be, and its a great checklist for what to look for in a guy.

i keep looking for someone to match this, and i think i may have found someone who comes very close, its great feeling this way, like God actually placed someone like this in my life.

anyways i keep looking and know that He has someone out there for me. and that has to keep me going...

AS I LAY DYING!!! NEW CD!!! JUNE 14!!!

June 12 2005
Christian Hardcore











As I Lay Dying - Shadows Are Security June 14
BUY IT!!!!!!!





It's out of my hands...and thats okay.

June 12 2005
There you go changing my plans again
There you go shifting my sands again
For reasons I don't understand again
Lately I don't have a clue

Just when I start liking what I see
There you go changing my scenery
I never know where you're taking me
But I'm trying just to follow you

It's out of my hands
It's out of my reach
It's over my head
And it's out of my league
There's too many things
That I don't understand
So it's into your will
And it's out of my hands

There you go healing these scars again
Showing me right where you are again
I'm helpless, and that's where I start again
I'm giving it all up to you

It's out of my hands
It's out of my reach
It's over my head
And it's out of my league
There's too many things
That I don't understand
So it's into your will
And it's out of my hands

Move me, make me
Choose me, change me
Send me, shake me
Find me, remind me
The past is behind me
Take it all away
Take it all from me, I pray

It's out of my hands
It's out of my reach
It's over my head
And it's out of my league
There's too many things
That I don't understand
So it's into your will
And it's out of my hands

very long i know...but please read..

June 12 2005
spiritual
yes, well i have been too cought up in guys that won't love me as much as this one & so i have found the one guy for me...God...i think i have been too cought up in others to relize that he is there & he loves me more than any guy on earth could...i am just to boneheaded to see it..yes i know they say this every week at church & i am just now relizing it...so i think i am gonna take a break from earthly guys & stick to the one one i will spend eternity with..the Lord so right now i am saying this...for every cute guy that comes & goes (and is stupid enought to break up over the internet becuase of your parents) i am gonna have the one Lord right there to comfort me...so i am think i am gonna take a break from boyfreinds right now...sorry the cute guy who works at kroger...who doesn't think i am just an imature sophmore because he is a senior...i am taking a break from guys to get back on the Godly path that is just right for me...now this really really really REALLY makes me wanna go to bigg stuf really bad now that i relize that i have been focused on stuff that won't be with me in heven...like this computer...i spend all day & all night on it...i think i need to take a little time of this thing i& read my Bible for a change...i mean all this stupid thing does is cause drama in my life that i can't fix...that is why i am handing my life to God & let Him help me "because i can do things throught CHRIST who strethen's me...well if i can't go to bigg stuf i guess i will have one of my own bigg stuf...at my house...

deicated to my lovely sister hannah taylor
& i am upset that my little sister is growing up so fast soon she will be in my place dating, drama, cheerleading, best freind movie trips, heartbreak, breakups, long convo's with that special someone, fights with her best freinds, them leaving you for someone else, tring to find your place in life...i am upset that she is gonna be gone till thursday in ky & this is her 1st big trip away from home...she went to st. louis last year but that was only for 2 days...but i mean my hannah taylor hale is almost a yuc!! yes can you belive it...our little starfish is almost a yuc gah she is growing up so fast (only beile-aire folks would know understand that last part) soon she will be sitting right where i am talking about me going to college or something gosh i know sometimes i just wanna punch her...but hannah taylor i love you sooo soo soo soo much & i am gonna miss you dearly while you are at crosspoint...even thought i said i wasn't gonna miss you you know i will miss you so much!! hannah i love you & never forget that...even though you probally won't see this till when you get home...i will put it in my xanga just for you in my next entry

my new cell phone
oh yeah i am getting a new cell phone!! kayla is a VERY happy person!! well i haven't got it yet because they haven't got the check in the mail for my parent's bill yet...they are putting me on thier cingular plan & i get 25 free text to send & to talk to any cingula person free..so if ya got cingular i will be calling you...oh yeah i am getting a phone like elizabeth's

yes..sorry for being so long i just had to get some stuff out

love you all...espically my Lord Jesus Christ
Kayla!!

edit:
i have found a new faorite song...thanks to elizabeth

I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

I'm 22 for a moment
She feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

I'm 33 for a moment
Still the man, but you see I'm a they
A kid on the way
A family on my mind

I'm 45 for a moment
The sea is high
And I'm heading into a crisis
Chasing the years of my life

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy, Time to lose yourself
Within a morning star

15 I'm all right with you
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

Half time goes by
Suddenly you're wise
Another blink of an eye
67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on...

I'm 99 for a moment
Dying for just another moment
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

15 there's still time for you
22 I feel her too
33 you're on your way
Every day's a new day...

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey 15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

five for fighting

Hope, God, and The Future

June 12 2005
hello all! Wow is all I can say. Today I have had a total renewal of hope within. God has been so good and never ceases to amaze me. When I need Him most, He's there. I may not feel His presence or realize He's evident in my life right away but He is always there. If anyone who is reading this does not know the true joy and fulfillment in having Christ in their lives, I beg you to not waste another minute, don't go to sleep untill you have tasted what is truly good...having a relationship with the Creator of the Universe and Savior of humanity. It's an incredible thing!
I had been very doubtful and fearful about where my life is headed lately, but God is turning my doubt and fear around into trusting and hoping in Him alone to carry out His plans (great plans) for my life. I have realized that my future is not for me to worry about...that is God's work, not mine. But He does expect me to do the best I can each day and to keep my faith and hope alive in what He is doing in my life, always. well, I hope you all have a wonderful week ahead! May God bless you always!

To whom this may concern: :)

June 12 2005
I'm still pretty new to all of this. It's pretty cool, cause most of the people on here I relate to me quite a bit. If anyone would like, you can "comment" me. It's free, I promise. ;) Til' then, or until the next time I write. Laterness. Much love to all and to all much love! God bless every single one who reads this, and even the people who don't! Cya.

-TifFany

People ask me...what do you want?

June 12 2005
I want to be intrigued by you
I want to watch you laugh and melt
I want to see you cry
I want you to pick apart my brain and completely fall in love with it
I want you to grow fond of my dramatic movie type scenarios that I insist on performing
I want to hear you say "I'm so glad you're here"
I want you to hug me for absolutely no reason at all
I want you to randomely ask "what are you thinking?"
I want you to wonder about me when you see me staring off..
I want you to challenge me
I want you to smile at me for no reason...just because you're glad to see me
I want you to want to know me.

yes, that's what I want.

Smiling is my favorite!

June 12 2005
Hey Jody and Monica! I finally saw "Elf" my two friends who keep telling me that I need to see it! It was pretty funny.. :P

So I've finally got all my kids entered in their events for the swim meet on Tuesday. It took me WAYY too long!! We start 2-a-day practices tomorrow.. Hope they aren't too crazy. I have 50 kids on the roster now!! O_O And if we get too many more, I may have to find me an assistant coach!!

YEP YEP.. things are going pretty swell right now. Praise the Lord for this summer.. for the bad and the good for I know that He will be there in whatever lies ahead, constant and unchanging, continuing to love us as His children. Man, am I one lucky girl to be loved so much... *happy sigh*

>>Check out that silly picture!!

the wedding was awesome!

June 12 2005
hey yall...as you kno i went to my cousins wedding. it was so B*E*Autiful! Sarah looked so pretty in her wedding dress and my cousing Jason looked very handsom! and the reception was so much fun they had a chocolate fountian that was huge! with it cam smores banananas(sp) strawberries pretzels nutter butters rice cripes yum lets jus say i was there awhile...lol...well yeah there was a lot of dancing and it was fun seeing old people break it down! and overall the wedding was fun and i cant wait til my other cousin gets married! it was a blast! well g2g thanks for everyone whp prayed for my dad he is back to normal!

Much love

~* Big O *~

ps this is prolly my last entry since im leaving for FL tommorrow so when i get abck i want lots of remarks and remarks on my pics!

Wow...

June 12 2005
Today's sermon was great. I couldn't stop smiling that whole time. Too bad Eric and Blake didn't come, they really should of heard it. It made me realize how much I miss being active in a church. I miss going to youth every sunday night with a friend. One day, I will find a youth group again...


**PSSSSSSST...Cameron is a fairy. - I have no clue who said that.**


I really want to go out to Cali./Mexico. Dumb mom.

clever title here.

June 12 2005
i just wanted to post again!

i hope everyone out there in cyber land is doing amazing. i don't have too much to say but i have to go to a staff meeting. i'll write mucho more later.

_kt

my long awaited edit//

i am now watching a special on the backstreet boys. very interesting.
the Lord has blessed me with an amazing job. i love it and it has introduced me to so many cool people.
anyways...maybe i'm just not that cool of a person but i don't get very many "remarks". sadness....
okay i'm over it

I just want to wake up...

June 12 2005
in someone else's arms.

PhuseBox Update

June 12 2005
I have been working on several new features for PhuseBox today. Unlike when I have made changes to the site in the past, I am going to keep these changes on a testing site first, and release it when everything is stable and I am happy with it... this could be a few days or even a few weeks.

I can tell you that I have some really awesome additions in the works... I am also getting around to fixing all the bugs.

Keep giving me feedback on how you like/dislike the site!

[nt]

California

June 12 2005
hello everyone,

I would like to announce....in case you guys didnt already know, that i am going to school in California in the fall! I'm super excited but i know that i will miss everyone so much. I am going to a Bible college in La Mirada CA ... its right outside of LA.

I am so worried that i wont be able to pass my classes and what not. Also, i really want to keep my spiritual life up and raise it even higher. I feel like i am falling like crazy and its so hard to read my Bible. But, I love my Lord and Savior so very much....so I know he will help me.

Please pray for me!

Why Do You Remain?

June 12 2005
In the youth section of our church bulletin, Skid shared part of a passage Kyle McCabe had journaled as a response to the idea of "baggage claim" during our quiet time on the spring retreat:

"As people, we naturally stand in line waiting to pick up our bags of guilt, fear, doubt, and sin. . . but while we're in line waiting for what is ours a stranger quietly walks to the front. At first no one notices him as he seems to be just one more man in the line, then something raises everyone's eyebrows at once. With his back to the crowd, the man raises a hand to shut off the conveyer belt. As his hand raises, the people catch a glimpse of the sunset through a hole in this man's hand. Then, with a sky of red and orange aflame behind him, he faces the crowd for the first time. He crowd takes notice of his haggard appearance and tear stained eyes. The path he walked to the front is a trail of blood and tears. 'Enough,' he yells of the murmurs. 'I have paid with all my blood, all my tears, and all my life.' A few people take this man at his word and leave the place and walk through the automatic sliding doors to find a new day of endless possibility instead of the impending night faced by those inside. . . all because they took the steos and said yes to this stranger. Yet the vast majority, those who profess belief and want so badly to have the courage to take the chance and those who coudn't care less about the battered and his words. . . remain. The man's eyes plead with them to leave the place. As a tear begins to roll down his cheek, in a wavering voice just above a whisper, he addresses all who have claimed belief, but are still there with a single question:'Why do you remain?'"

-Kyle McCabe, March 2005

Untitled

June 12 2005
Hey yah was bored and though i would make 1 of these thingys prop wont us it but o well haha

vbs

June 12 2005
worked vbs this week.. helped in the 3 year old room.. that was ALOT of fun (seriously lol)

i love little kids.. i definitely want to go into a profession having to spend as much time with little kids as possible

i'm leaving for panama city for cheerleading camp in less than 2 weeks.. ahhhh i'm so excited! i'll finally get to go to the beach! (considering ive NEVER been to a beach before)

crazy i know..

welp.. nothing else to say.. everyone have a great week!

thanks for the "remarks"

I'm all shook up!!!

June 12 2005
Whew! I feel like I've been around the world! Well just TN I guess! This weekend was Jeremy and Kim's wedding. It was beautiful!!! It was like a fairytale. Anywho I went to Graceland and the Memphis Zoo. They were fun places!!! I made WAY too many pictures but its all good. Tomorrow I am going to be EMPOWERED!!!!!! Day camp begins and I am a little nervous b/c I know none of the kids, but I am REALLY REALLY excited!

Lauren, now all the babysitting stories that took me forever to tell will be camp stories....I can sense your excitement even from an hour away!!

TTFN

Untitled

June 12 2005
Holla, well i didnt really like my other one so i made a new phusebox, so...welcome!

jolly ranchers

June 12 2005
well i dont particularly know how to work this.. buuut, ill try. its wayy neater than xanga yo.

I LOVE KAYAKING

June 12 2005
so ya yesterday we went kayaking and it was amazing it had just rained so everything was really still and serene i loved it it was like hi im God and look what i can do ya it was cool so i guess ill post later -me

Hey Guys

June 12 2005
Guess what..... Today was so fun. Me and some friends went to the mall and hung out for a while. Then we just drove around the backroads. I live in Knoxville. Well I don't want my friends to know but when I was driving I kept thinking of how I wanted to move. The town is to big for me. Everyone I know lives here tho. So I need to know some people before I move. I don't know what to do.
Carrie

Another port from xanga.. deal with it!

June 12 2005
Sunday, June 12, 2005

I thought maybe it would be due time for a new entry. I truly do hate updating this thing. My posts on xanga are not far from ending completely, so enjoy these last posts. By the way, this post may not make a lot of sense if you didnt read my last post.. (special note, I enjoy phusebox so much more ;) )

Well anywho, it's been a week and like.. 4 days since the surgery. Things have become immensely easier to deal with, but its still a pain in the ass. I'm starving.. literally I'm thinking more about food than I am sex lately. I could easily masturbate successfully to the smell of a pizza. It's rough shit living on Slimfast and soup.. I miss chewing. Another thing I really miss - Talking. Yeah that's a underappreciated skill. I'm getting better with articulating my way through things without talking (gestures and such) but it just doesn't cut it. Besides those two things, I'm pretty much ok with this. It doesn't hurt or anything.. although I do really badly want to stretch my cheek muscles... and yawning hurts like a bitch, let me tell you.

I'm back to work now. In case no one knows, I got a job at Carmike Cinemas like.. a month ago. I never mentioned it on here, too lazy. It's a pain working with the jaws wired shut. I can barely communicate with anyone there, plus I'm still extremely tired.. probably because I barely have any calorie intake. Everything is exhausting to me. But alas, I'm dragging my way through, and at least it passes the time. Everyone picks on me though! Gosh! lol everytime a supervisor or manager got a chance, they asked me questions or told me to get on post.. gah.. bastards. I don't mind it honestly though .. hey, there is a blessing - I can't work post! This rocks because post is the equal to Satan's asshole... anywho.

I want to send a shout out to all my family and friends who are helping me get through this. I'm not going to name everyone, it would become a huuuuuuuge list.. but I wanted to send a shout out to Kelly who came by my house when I was still all swollen and weird looking, and gave me flowers. It meant the world to me. And Kim, thanks for the call even though I couldn't even say hello! It meant a lot ! everyone is being so understanding and loving and accepting.. I really appreciate it, I don't think I'd be able to get through this if you guys weren't so great.

I've lost some weight due to the.. not being able to eat diet, so.. I've decided just to push it all the way. Working out now. Dunno, may do something with my hair (I shant cut it bitches).. Its going to be fun coming in school in the fall with the surgery done and a more.. toned body.. more for me than anything else. Although nothing can really fix the damage that I suppose God made (or my mothers vagina, I don't know) when I was born, I still want to at least try and look my best.

I have been wasting my spare time over this summer. I've been bored and enjoying it, unlike most of you people. I read so many xangas and hear so many people saying how boring summer is, and how much it sucks. I love it. All through school last year I YEARNED to be bored instead of so stressed out.. well now I'm bored and enjoying every last drip of it. I will even more so after I get this shit taken out and I can EAT. I'm going to start writing again.. some poem I wrote was nominated for something or other on poetry.com, and supposedly I can win $20,000, but it says I'd have to go to DC and recite it.. and obviously thats impossible, and besides, I wouldn't win even if I could... but I do want to write some more.. I want to start my novel i've always dreamed of.. "Honk If You Love Jesus!" Yes that's right.. and yes, there is good reason behind the silly title. Its a very serious book though, make no doubt. It's about the second coming of Jesus.. yes he comes back to bring the saved home, and the sinners to be left behind and punished in the tribulations! But.. no one listens. People think he's crazy, he even gets locked up. He becomes homeless and such.. and is slowly corrupted by the world into becoming just another corrupt human. The title you ask? Well.. he becomes a used car salesman (a metaphor for corruption), and on the back of his own car is a bumper sticker that says "Honk if you love jesus!", which it describes at the end of the book. At an innerstate, he is honked at.. and he just grins to himself. I think its pretty bad ass.. and its mine bitches!

IDEA COPYRIGHTED by DANIEL AUSTIN on JUNE 12, 2005!

Anyway... I'm rambling. Life is actually pretty good for me right now.. I can complain, but I don't want to. The stress of school is over, and once this surgery is knocked out of the park, I think I'll be pretty damn happy.. although to be fair, I've never been so lonely in my life. But I have friends, and a wired shut jaw, so low expectations on finding anyone who would put up with me for the next 5 weeks. But I guess I should have the same low expectations on that even after the stuff gets off. Its ok though, I wouldn't put up with me either. Still.. I guess it's just way to much to ask for to fall in love. Scratch that, I fall in love way too easily. It's too much to ask for to fall in love, and for things to work out.. that's never happened for me.. ever. Maybe... someday?

Until then, I shall be here.. I'll be here writing my stories and poetry, like the little extroverted introvert that I am.. a hermit if you would. You need not look further than Carmike on the weekends if you wish to find me, and some weekdays. If I'm not there, you can bet I'm here in front of my computer, being bored, and enjoying it.. and being hungry.. dreaming about a combination of cheeseburgers and pizza... I tell you, it could revolutionize the entire food industry... hrmm

By the way, the new song is Hold On Hope by Guided Voices. I hope you like it as much as I do. It's a pretty inspirational song, and I can connect with the lyrics..
Hope really is the last thing that's holding me..
...the *last* thing...

Much love.

-Daniel

Its from xanga..

June 12 2005
Friday, June 03, 2005

By the waym, the name of the procedure is Le Fort II Osteotomy.


I suppose now is the best time to write a new entry. I was going to wait until I had recovered from this shit, but I feel compelled to type all I can, seeing as I cannot talk offline. Today is Friday, it is currently about 7:30. I got home from my wednesday surgery about 5-6 hours ago. The surgery I had was called something like Lefours II Osteonomy, I dunno, but regardless, it was jaw surgery. To explain, I have some fucked up teeth. Many have probably noticed my lack of chin? This was because my auxillory jaw (the top one) was so out of wack on angle that it was so far up that only the 12 yr molars in my teeth met. I've only had 4 teeth meeting for most of my life. I have gotten used to so many dentists saying "How the hell do you eat?" Well, wednesday we went in to fix it. I don't remember much, but I remember waking up and puking blood, and going back to sleep. They woke me up periodically to make me cough up blood or to spit something out, or to take deep braeths. It felt to me like 20 minutes, but apprently I was back in the surgery recovery room with my very own 24/7 nurse for 4 hours. why is this neccessary for a jaw surgery? There were complications. My right lung collapsed. I don't really remember why it collapsed, Dr. Hardison was explaining it. I believe it was due to the tube down my nose/throat, due to the blood filling my lungs, and due to not taking breaths when under the knife. I am finally wheeled out with an oxygen mask on, still pretty woosy. I remember seeing my little brother and I started to cry a little. He just looked so happy, and I was drugged up, so I cried a lil. That night wasnt that bad.. the leakage on my was still wet and I was still drugged. They set me in the CCU for the night.. which is a small step down from the ICU. the ICU is Intensive Care Unit, CCU is Critical Care Unit. I was plugged up to all sorts of monitors to watch over me, and I had to stay on an oxygen mask. Plus about every 2-3 hours someone would come in and give me a breating treatment. Note that this entire time, my jaws are wired shut. thats right -- I'm trying to spit liquids through a wired shut jaw. It was difficult. The second day/night was the worse. They tried to get me to drink liquids, but my throat wouldn't swallow.. I just wanted to get home. Everything went about the same, except I drank a little and walked a lot.. that night was horrible though, as my nose clogged up bad. I almost.. hell Im not going to lie, I did cry a little. Its a scary feeling not being able to breath, or walk on your own, or even piss on your own. I had to find my own way of breathing, and it was really frustrating. They finally let me out today at near 2ish. I drank enough and walked enough. So I've spent my day lazily at home just trying to be comfortable with my new environment. I had some pediolite and powerade to drink and my antibiotics went down well.. so I'm proud of myself. I just got done my 6th shower of the night.. they help more than any could know. The steam clears my airways, and the hot water slowly unnumbs my currently numb face muscles. the only thing I can't stand is not being able to control my saliva much. It's frustrating! I feel like a 4 year old.. I can't stop drooling. its a shame :-\ Plus my face is all bloated like a chipmunk.. its pretty discouraging. but.. I have a chin? ;)

It has been a better day today, hopefully tomorrow will be even better, and so on until I get this shit removed and my swelling goes down. Whichever first, I don't care.

Anyone can call me at (615) 556-3737 if you'd like, but do know that I wont be able to talk back. the most I can do is just groan.



Photo From bee136

June 11 2005


photo from bee136

i love this picture!!!! jonathan's the coolest!

eating wendy's chili

June 11 2005
though i am not a fast food fan by any means, i would first like to say that wendy's is the best fast food place on this side of the nile river! lucky for us (as i'm reading off the paper chili bowl), their chili has always been low fat and high fiber.
today i went to a tennessee association of student nurses meeting in murfreesboro, then visited my family for lunch. speaking of regular, we had bran muffins and fruit for dessert!
i was asked to work at poet's tonight, so i went in and worked with stacey and lucas. that was fun, though i am still pretty tired from camp.
speaking of camp...the last day, i randomly started singing songs from mary poppins. some of the other staff girls joined in, and we had a lovely time serenading the pool with "just a spoon full of sugar" and "supercalafradulousetexpialadocious" (hooked on phonics worked for me).
wow, i am really tired. i need to go to bed so i can wake up in the morning and go to church at the coolest church in the world...the river community church!!!
cya

Untitled

June 11 2005
agree or disagree with this statement:

you can love someone and not like them.


why or why not? discuss nicely, if you want, please.

New PhuseBox Coming Soon...

June 11 2005
Today, I started to program some new features into PhuseBox that will be available soon. I am reworking some of the control pannel options and things like that. When I launch the new version of the site, I will be taking into consideration your input. Please, continue to give me your feedback by remarking on the previous post about USER REQUESTS.

Thanks again!
[nt]

strange...

June 11 2005
has anyone else ever noticed how life can somehow be amazingly good, yet terribly bad at the same time?

on one hand, i'm really happy, and proud
on the other, i'm really sorry, and feel like a jerk
on one hand, i feel calm and at peace
on the other, i'm really confused and lost
on one, excited and thrilled
the other, sad and depressed...

...i wish i was in florida right now. i could really use some time away from here...

Untitled

June 11 2005
hola everyone!
well, a little about myself, i enjoy sunsets, italian dinners, long walks on the beach, dictating my wonderful country of luxembourg, my future ambitions are to take over the rest of europe and make contacts in russia in the near future!

Well here it is!

June 11 2005
I am so excited about having a phuse box! i dunno why, but it sure seems cool....i sure like the name....PHUSE BOX....its like some sort of thing....and i have absolutely no idea how to use it.....i just found out about it on xanga.....so heads up please!!! lol anyways....i guess ill end it...i just got back from jessis and i need to get in my newly decorated bath room!

fOrEvEr aNd aLwayS mY bAby yOull bE!!!

tAyLoR

Untitled

June 11 2005
I feel like I dissapoint people sometimes.

Just another one of those weird moods I suppose.

34 days, 2 hours, 4 minutes, and 43 secounds till the new Harry Potter Book comes out!

Untitled

June 11 2005
i am back in the boro again...it was sad leaving all my friends at home, because i won't be back for a while, but it's time to make some money. we had band practice tonight for an event next saturday at the bcm. we are playing a bunch of rock songs and supposedly will be performing on a flat-bed tractor trailer...haha...it just makes me laugh.

bonnaroo was happening and it would have taken forever to get home, but i took the backway so it wasn't too bad. the way back was peaceful, so overall, i enjoyed it.

i am constantly reminded lately of God's faithfulness. its like the story of the prodigal son. he is waiting for his children to return home and shower them with love. water for the thirsty, peace for the distressed, rest for the weary, hope for the hopeless. he is there with open arms as his children awake to his goodness. i want to take so much upon myself sometimes. to do all i can to make things better, but it is in those times that He just bends down and picks me up like a father his son and says, "i love you son" as he rocks me to sleep. what better place is there than in the hands of the father?

Finally gotta PhuseBox

June 11 2005
hayy everyone..well i finally got a phusebox..idk if im goin to keep it...im kinda just tryin it out & i kno few who have one..well last nite was great..i went to the movies with stacy!!! ahh soo much funn..we saw lords of dogtown..there isnt much to say so i guess im out!

I'm soo EXCITED

June 11 2005
Today was parent's day at Gov School...and of course Mac got to come...i was soooo happy...it just made my day!!!....but other than that its going to be a long 3 weeks to go until i can get away (for good) from TTU....but other than that i'm fine...well gtg ttyl

Muuuuuuch better

June 11 2005
Spent 2 days with Jane.

And then a day with Megan.

My life is mucho mucho better. ^_^

But those clothes still suck. Only now I'm stuck with them. Blech.

SAVED!:

"I only have room for one of you."

"I'm the father."

"I'm the boyfriend."

"I'm his boyfriend."

Yeah. That be one awesome movie.

So I guess this is farewell

June 11 2005
Monday i head out to the Wilds in NC for the last time as a camper. i guess it's bitter sweet. i hope to work there in the future tho. the only thing that is really heavy on my heart is that i will be visiting w/ a friend from CIT (a two week "Camper In Training" program) last year... and i have to have a "talk" w/ him. i have a feeling that i'll have to break his heart. i dread it. i really do. i know that God has a plan for all this. and i'm trusting that this week will be great. yet, i could really use your prayers

Father,
thank you for this last chance to visit as a camper. thank you for the 2 girls from church who are rooming w/ me. thank you for our sponsers. God, i really want to pray for my counselor that you would give her some extra grace this week. give her the words that we will all need to hear. help me to serve her in any way possible. be with the girls in my cabin... i pray each heart (including my own) would be open and ready for all that you have for us to learn. help us to draw closer to you this week. help our cabin to truely be unified be w/ the speakers. give them the words that every ear there will need to hear... and help every heart to be changed by it. prepare each heart for your word. do great things in our lives (including the speakers, counselors, sponsers, and staff). be with me as i talk to my friend. help him to understand all that i have to say. help me to be compassionate, honest, and open. help me to point him to you and every way possible. help him to see that you are my first priority. thank you for this gift and time of singleness in my life. help me to be satisfied w/ you in every way and to wait on your timing for romance. let my heart never wonder. go w/ me. and bless this week. in Christ's name, amen.

none

June 11 2005
hey um....just seeing how this works. it's my first time at this thing. i hope i enjoy it....lol. t2yl....i guess.

more baseball and relaxtion

June 11 2005
well i have had another tournament this weekend and we have actually done quite well. today we played a team from clarksville (where i formally lived) and half the guys were on my t-ball team and i recognized them , it was pretty cool :) we play tomorrow in the championship round and we are the number one seed! this week has been nothing but laying around, working out, and baseball it's fun but it gets boring after a while :/
wish me luck for tomorrow

I'm terrified...

June 11 2005
I just watched TV for a little while and now I am scared that my loved ones will die. Sometimes I just get that way. :/ I hope everything goes OK and that I am next to die.

Anyways, today I went to my first bridal shower. I got some very nice gifts, everyone was really nice, the food was wonderful. All the same, I felt very uncomfortable. Everyone was looking at me, and I don't handle that well. I feel very awkward around people. It went better than I expected, though.

I took Kenobi to the vet where I used to work in Knoxville. He has an upper respiratory infection, and so they gave us antibiotics and an antihistamine. They also said he couldn't take in enough fluids, so they injected fluids under his skin, giving him a bit of a camel hump. :) He is supposedly going to get better soon. We have been really worried about him. The vet gave him a lot of compliments, many people loved him.

Well, I am gonna go surf the net and maybe play a little World of Warcraft.

Gather up your jackets move it to the exits i hope you have found a friend.

June 11 2005
Well this week was fairly good. i mean i made 35 buks in 2 days thats alot considerin my laziness. i was playin knights of the old republic for about 5 hours every day and i still didnt beat it. it made me so very sad :(. well grant came ova yestaday and we played video games and slept at 4 am. then this morinin we went to coolsprings. well that shows how eventful my life is if u care to contribute to my remarks column. u'd make me very happy indeed

-drew

Just Another Day

June 11 2005
Yup it's just another boring day. It's to groggy and gloomy outside to bo anything fun. Sometime I hate TN weather.

ooook

June 11 2005
ooook, well i joined this cause micheal said he had a thingy and i just join cause i'm bored.

oook, well i took my ACT today. i have no idea how i did or what ever. i had a hard time consentrating, and i had to spend a few minites tring to understand the format. it was really annoying, and made me feel stupid... ha ha, i'm still here though, physicly but not mentaly, thanks ACT :-D >.< .
oh, i got the perfect ending in ffX-2. For those of you that know what that is, its not really worth it.

uhh...
l8r

hola mi amigos

June 11 2005
well, today has been....boring. Nothing to do whatsoever. Oh well, maybe I can stir up some trouble before the night is over, lol. That's a laugh...me stirrng up trouble? hah! well it did sound interesting.
But yeah, yesterday was fun. Star Wars is by far one of my favorite movies now.

Well, I am learning that being content in Christ is something to be learned. I can't just wake up and suddenly be that way. I have to realize that He truly is the only thing I'll ever need in this life. I also have realized I've been inwardly as well as outwardly complaining about some things and it was wrong of me. Anna, you know what I'm talking about.....I complained to you about stuff actually last night, but I just wanted to say thanks for letting me vent out about stuff,

"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life- in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing." Phillipians 2:14-16

*crickets chirping*

June 11 2005
everbody is either in florida, at a party, or just out. and i'm here. . . alone. blah.

Untitled

June 11 2005
Why wont you run
In the rain and play
Let the tears splash all over you

so disappointed

June 11 2005
i'm kinda bummed cause i didn't get out to the DZ like i had planned and i didn't even go today(sat) cause the weather is crappy. BUT i did go to the wave pool yesterday and it was super cool, except they close the pool at 730 and we got there at 6. it was still nice however to get in the water and hang out with my friend ryan. afterwards we diecded to head down to station square where they were having this expo of TONS of bbq. too bad for us you had to pay a five dollar cover charge to get in because there was some stupid cover band on stage playing music i didn't even want to listen to. i asked the woman at the ticket counter if i could wear earplugs and not pay the five bucks but she just laughed at me. so we went out to this place called lonestar and feasted on ribs there. who knew that pig could be so tasty. after we ate we headed home to get some beers, but went over to one of his friends house where we had planned to watch Legend, but the dude wasn't feeling well so we hung out with his roomates for a while until they decided to go out. overall it was a pretty good day even tho i didn't get to go out to the skydiving place..... and I'M STILL ALIVE!!! YAHOOOO. l8r

Good Times

June 11 2005
well me and holly went to the movies last nigh and it was extra fun.....we saw Lords of Dogtown...it was great! there were like these weirdo guys who kept standin up while they were playin the nationial anthem during the previews...it was funny! soo i took some pics befor i went soo im gonna post them tell me what you think about them.....much love!!
Stacy

User Requests

June 11 2005
Well, it has been just over two weeks since I started programming PhuseBox. I cannot believe that we have almost 200 users in the first two weeks. Keep spreading the word and I will do my best to make this the best blogging community on the internet.

So, after two weeks of existance, I am asking you, the users, what features that you would like to see added to PhuseBox in the future?

What is your take on music?
What is your take on cutom layouts?
Is the interface easy?
etc... just ramble in the remarks about what you like or dislike or what you want to see...

I have exciting ideas ahead including a new way to get photos onto your PhuseBox site... that is coming soon.

Thanks in advance for the remarks!