"You and me--our walking paces,
the vistas we've seen,
and all our experiences
are all different.

For instance,
where I felt despair,
you find
a beautiful flower."
-Ayu


photo from NeoDaydream

"Today's happy face, today's sad face.
Yesterday's weak self, tomorrow's strong self.
If it's you, who are you showing it to? If it's me, who should I show it to?"
-Ayu


photo from NeoDaydream

"Choosing only the things you like
isn't irresponsible.
If you can't find anything you like
then why accept the responsibility?
I take only the possibilities that I'm ready to accept.

If it's something you don't need then
compassion is of no use at all.
If it's something important then
pain will probably accompany it.
Loneliness that you feel together is worse
than a loneliness that you feel
by yourself.

No matter what loneliness comes,
no matter what pain you feel,
you mustn't close your eyes to it.
Because even if you lose all your
words, even if you say it doesn't matter,
if you stumble
it will be there to help you up.
That's what kind of thing it is."
-Ayu

photo from NeoDaydream

"It's true, isn't it? It seems as though
we're headed for a new century. It's miraculous:
This is something you can only taste once.
Let's remember one more time.

On the day we arrived on this Earth
we were somehow happy,
and somehow it hurt.
We were crying

Reality is a traitor; it's easy
to misjudge things. So with your own two eyes
please decide the worth of this place.
Do it with your own standards.

We've arrived in these times.
But somehow things move on
So somehow we're standing here
and we're living through today."
-Ayu


photo from NeoDaydream

"I want to go to that place.
I've prepared for my journey;
all that's left is to start running.

The closer I get, the more
I seem to understand,
but I still pretend not to see.

But I've come to the point
where I can't turn back,
and that's where I hesitate.

Even stopping
scares me. Fragile and
crying, you said to me:

Being sad is the same as giving up.

In gathering, displaying, and viewing
only beautiful things
and seeing only beautiful dreams,
I was only lamenting reality.

Trying to give a shape to
happiness is the same as
saying there's no reason behind love.

Yes, I've been thinking too hard,
in my head. I've been searching
for answers I don't expect to find.

I'm tired of those days of meaningless fun.

While chasing and being chased,
I've lost sight of my home.
So as not to be hurt any more,
I closed my eyes and turned away.

In gathering, displaying, and viewing
only beautiful things
and seeing only beautiful dreams,
I only lamented reality.

No matter what this place is like,
no matter where I go next,
I'll share my freedom and loneliness.
I think I can make it as I am now."
-Ayu


photo from NeoDaydream

"As I look around,
everyone busily
hurries on by.

I noticed that this year, too,
the signs of winter have
come very soon.

Again, somewhere in this city today
two people will meet and fall in love;
the curtains are violently opened.

Even so, everything eventually,
someday, has an end.

Again, somewhere in this city today
two people split apart;
the curtains are quitely dropped."
-Ayu


photo from NeoDaydream


photo from NeoDaydream

"If you only look
You will never get it

If you only look
It will never be yours"
-Ayumi Hamasaki

in case you didn't notice, most of my entries are quotes from a Japanese singer, Ayumi (Ayu) Hamasaki. she is extremely cool! ^^
anyho, today was as good as it could be considering the complications...
this morning i got up at 5! (yeah, 5!) and went to Disciple w/ my baby sis (Elissa) and LaDonna at Waffle House. and it went really well! ^^ we decided on some memorization and then we read some 1 Timothy 1 which was awesome! so much good stuff in there!
anywayz, school was kinda tough cuz i'm not feeling that good... but God is sooooo funny to me! like, in Int. Mult. class we have to make a presentation on how to...(choose subject) and i decided to teach HTML code... and i couldn't figure out something i wanted to show on my presentation and i tried everything but i couldn't find it! and then, in my next class (Web Page design) we learned how to do it! We're so lucky to have a loving creator that has a sense of humor! lol and also... i've been worrying and voicing my worry about Alison Garner being a threat to me in choir (i want a part in the musical) and then we were put in groups to sing together in choir today and who am i put w/? Brett, Andy, Tyler... and... ALISON! i don't have anything against her, i mean, i love her to death, she's so sweet! but i kno how good she is...
anyho, i guess i better end this super long entry... ciao guys! ^^

"The season I was looking forward to has come
The wind is stirring, the city is taking life

The morning comes earlier than usual
I feel I can walk well only for that

There are plenty of terrible news around nowadays
But please don't leave pleasure behind because of sadness"
-Ayumi Hamasaki


photo from NeoDaydream

photo from NeoDaydream

"Sometime, surely since before you were born,
I was searching for something unchanging.
I'd find it, and lose it, and sometimes
there were nights when I hurt people.

If just one of your wishes could come true,
If just one of your wishes could come true,
what would you wish for?
What would you wish for, here, under this sky?

Despite my strong desire,
I started giving up.
I'd find it, release it, and sometimes
there were nights when I hurt myself.

If there were something I could give to you,
If there were something I could give to you,
It would be my unchanging, certain thoughts.

If you'll laugh for me, even just a little,
then there's still a reason for me to live here.
If you'll search for me, even just a little,
then maybe my living here will be accepted.

If just one of your wishes could come true,
If just one of your wishes could come true,
what would you wish for?

If there were something I could give to you,
If there were something I could give to you,
It would be my unchanging, certain thoughts.
Yes, my unchanging, certain thoughts.
Right here."
-Ayumi Hamasaki


photo from NeoDaydream

"Sometimes
We make
Terrible mistakes

And then while
We come to overlook a little
Like onlookers

We start to walk
As if nothing had happened
But I remember today
That the fighting never ends

Maybe everyone did so to protect love"
-Ayumi Hamasaki


photo from NeoDaydream

"Sayonara --- Even my last words don't reach you
I'm made to realize the coldness of the parting
I wish I could have heard from you
That you never regretted the days we had spent together
Only once, even if it had been a lie"
-Ayumi Hamasaki



photo from NeoDaydream

"Giving a smile fit for each situation
Saying plausible words
I go blank
It's about time to end up pretending to be impassive"
-Ayumi Hamasaki



photo from NeoDaydream

*above* my fav. Japanese performing artist! ^^

Last nite, i accidently ran thru a red light and then i stepped (barefoot) in dog poop, then i ran into Rae in the dark... now, my dad says i'm gonna have a car accident soon. God told him... so i'm SO scared... i feel like not even letting anyone ride w/ me anymore ya kno? i mean, i'd be sooooooo scared if i was in an accident all by myself but i'd rather go thru that than have someone i love in the car w/ me get hurt in the accident...

"The moment I say something
Everything may slip down through my fingers like sands
And I only wait the time passing by so calmly
Please tell me that this pain is surely an illusion
Please tell me that I'm not like myself at all now"
-Ayumi Hamasaki

"I like glittering things and pretty things
As much as before
But being cool and being tough
Have become more important lately

You see? Times have changed so much
But why do I still hear such words as
"Tears are women's weapons"?

We have our weak sides
We are not always smiling
Don't forget
That we don't exist to be convenient for you

Though it's certain
I have a pain in my chest on some nights

It might be true
The more one experiences sufferings
The more he can be tender and strong

Do you think you have controlled everything
With a knowing look?
We are not dolls
Who are only dreaming

Do you think you have cheated us well
With a satisfied look?
Do remember
That we are not such simple beings"

-Ayumi Hamasaki

"The gap between idealism and reality
Is so very cutting
And as we cannot cut them off, they are opening up.
In this place, will we give up?
Or will we persevere and do our very best?"

-Ayumi Hamasaki

"never knew i could feel like this
Itz like i've never seen the sky before
want to vanish inside your kiss
every day i'm lovin' you more and more
listen to my heart, can you hear it sings
telling me to give you everything
seasons may change
winter to spring
but i love you
until the end of time
come what may
come what may
I will love you until my dying day...
suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
it all revolves around you
and there's no mountain too high
no river too wide...
sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
storm clouds may gather and stars may collide
but i love you
until the end of time
come what may
come what may
I will love you until my dying day..."
-Moulin Rouge

The Exorcism of Emily Rose was awesome! ^^ "ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX!"

young man, there's no need to feel down
i said, young man, pick urself off the ground...

Thank
God
Itz
Friday!!!!!!
Ya like my new profile pic?
"Let me check my hat!"-Me

so... Yesterday was SOOOOOO amazing! Picnic at the park, tire-swing, Fun-dips @ Dollar General, Red Eye, The Chase Party House, my pool, Jordan's harry butt, pizza, and much much more!