Okay.  A long, long time ago I fell madly {{and unrequitedly-slash-he-had-no-clue}} in love with a gorgeous gentleman.  We'll call him Fido.  No, it wasn't a dog.  That's gross.  REGARDLESS.  Fido and I had seen each other occassionally at the place of commerce where he works and established a rather lovely rapport, if I do say so.  Got on first name basis, exchanging life//childhood details, et cetera.  Certain friends who knew of my undying love {{tongue-in-cheek, haha, no pun intended *wink*}} were harrassing me about making 'moves' and being bold and other crap like that.  All of the above has gotta count for something, right?  So I'm in Place of Commerce and we're talking, asking how each other is, pleasantry-pleasantry-pleasantry.  And Fido says he's even better than last time we talked!  Well, of course, I ask why.  Share the joy, and all.

"Well, I got another job, and tomorrow my wife finds out if she's having a boy or a girl!"

?!!!

My response: to gasp rather too loudly and clap both hands over my mouth.  Fortunately, Fido interpreted this as shared happiness for him, and added, "Yeah, I'm pretty excited, too."  At this point I had recovered my composure enough to whip out those improvisational acting skillZ and congratulate and be all girly with his girly coworkers about it.  {{All the while contemplating suicide.}}

AGH!!  UGH!!  URRRG!!!!  *Spasm*

My one true love has betrayed me.... *Melodramatic Fainting Motions*

So yeah, I thought you guys might enjoy that and get a good laugh out of my broken heart.  </3  Because I don't want to suffer in vain, you know.  ;)

Yeah, I'll laugh after the therapy.  Chocolate counts as therapy, right??