Although I haven't been updating much I immensley enjoy reading up on everyone's life and have done so faithfully. Yet here lately with the numerous posts about leaving to begin the journey that leads into a life of one's own I have executed many one sided coversation in my own little world...my mind.

I find it almost sad that everyone looks around and sees a place where they have grown up, with all the friends they created many a memory with through the numerous years of friendship, and they know they are leaving it for college of the misc. other things. Maybe it's jealousy because I never technically had a graduating class that I had gone through school with...the only year I went to high school in Murfreesboro I was in between classes {{never technically a junior and never technically a senior}} then I ran straight for the college campus. I look at all the people I had grown up with in Montana and wonder what life has been like spending the last two years as if nothing changed. What would it have been like if I had been able to enjoy my highschool years with all those I had grown up with? Would college have been a bit more scarey instead of something that was considered a simple upgrade?

I know all of this is crazy talk and not much of it probably makes sense, but I'm just off thinking about what could have or would have been if I wasn't here... there are a few things that never would have happened either though. Pros and cons...here we go.

If I had stayed in Montana:

I would have never finished high school in 3 years

I would have never met Herschel

I would have never gone to college right away

I would have never enjoyed a choral competition in New York City

I would have never met so many people I love (oh you know who you are!)

so many more...

I would have gone back to China to teach english for a few more years

I would have continued in my Thespian passion

I would have been with those I grew up with

I would have continued playing tennis, basketball and volleyball

I would have had a second or even third letter and 4 plus pin for my lettermans jacket

Oh lord... it's a pity party post. To bad! Love you all!