MOOD: HAPPY .. at the moment

OMGosh i love horses but it can hurt when you haven't riden in so dagum long. But Lilly and i had a LOT of fun riding the other day! I L-O-V-E the weather! it makes me so so so so so happy. I think i'm just really happy b/c i got to ride! Yeah my horse wasn't fantastic, BUT i haven't been riding her so she's not in shap so i'll give her some slack. I really and truly think God gave us horses so we could have a taste of Heaven. Well i wont make this long and boring, just thought i would tell you fanastic people what i've been up to :)

So today I was faced with a big slap of reality. I realized friends don’t last forever and sometimes they dup you like your nothing. I don’t want this to be a "oh look at me...I’m so pitiful" kinda post. I just want to be over all this, I make on mistake and it changes EVERYTHING. I think back on it and if I hadn’t have done one thing...one simple thing... everything would be the same. Yeah I would be faced with this later on in the rode and I don’t regret what I did per say, I just wish things would have gone differently. Today was one of my top 20 worst bad days...yeah that might not sound all that bad, but I have had a LOT of "bad days" in my past 3 to 4 years so the top 20 is BIG. I sat in the car ( riding home from spanish with the Bakers and the twins ) and as soon as I get in that car....so MANY MANY good memories flashed back to me, baby sitting, times Lane and I dressed up and told the kids stories, times we run around the house singing as loud as we could and laughing but I also remember all the bad stuff. It was a lot to take in and then I realized it was all in the past, and when I look into my future, I don’t see any of those good times or bad times happening again. Pretty much almost all my friends from the past few years have ether stepped away or have pushed me to the outside of everything. Its not any of you guys on PhuseBox...just other people I know and have been friends with for so long time. I get the picture, I have to move on and start a new chapter in my life. I used to love starting a new chapter, but now, closing this chapter means saying good bye to some really good times.

Well I sound really stupid and you probably don’t agree with most everything I said, but I personally am over the whole people pleaser thing.

So tonight, i went with
Seth
Milla
Nana
Jake
Josh
Lilly
and some adults to the High-school football game. It was a lot of fun. Personally for me just to be out of the house and not worrying about school was FANTASTIC! We won! yaaaaaa use...but we won like in the last 40 seconds! it was really good!
Here are some random pictures i took....

 Ok Ok i know i already posted ONCE today but i was like MAN i have changed the past year or so. And then i went back to the first few pictures i put on here and then looked at the last few ones i put on here! lol it was pretty funny!

 

BEFORE

AFTER

haha

MOOD: Dieing from to much HomeWork

 

I lost my voice (sad face) BUT i am still talking, although i sound really weird :P ha today at MOPS (something i Volunteer for @ my church) and Chandler was making fun of me b/c i sounded funny...  But he is a fun kid so i dont care :P haha i make fun of him for being short so we are cool. And then i got the 1 room i didn't want to work in. It was the 4 and 5 year olds! OMGosh when we went to the gym to play...all the little kids chased me and when i gave up they started beating me. I was like "GOSH your all evil" Their looks are deceiving. But it was fun. Then Devin wouldn't work...he thinks valunteering with the kids is boring. ( i think its dangerous )
But Last Night (yeah i'm going backwards) i got to hang out with the cool kids (they think they are cool that is) no i hung out with Devin, Chandler and Daniel. It was so a party....lol no but Devin did run into some guys car with is bike....haha it was funny (you would have had to been there to understand) Anyways, i'm just taking a break from school and thought i would tell you guys whats up with me.
Talks to you people later
"Don't Be Messy"

So this is my song of the day .. week... ! lol i just like this song :P haha it makes me smile. Anyway, i'm taking a break from school and thought i would put it on here :) Talks to you people later

MOOD: Crying

Ha isn't amazing how one day you could be so happy and the next so sad. Well yeah all i have to say is for 3 months life will be VERY VERY different for me. You dont need to know why, its nothing big or bad, but its something i dont want to do. Yet i fell God has asked me to. SO.... i have to
Please keep me in your prayers! Thanks

MOOD: Smiling

Whats up people?
So yesterday was a really good day for me. My whole family came out (aunts and uncles and all that big shabang) it was so much fun! Well i just thought i would let you people now i had a FANTASTIC day yesterday! Yaaaaa Me!
How are you people?

lol this makes me laugh.....hahahahaha :)

MOOD: BORED

Grace + Boredom = BAD

So i am bored tonight, like awalys. But instead of wallowing in my boredom i thought i would post to you boring people.

MOOD: Confused 

 

Ok, so i have a question.

What if i want to do something, but i am afraid people will treat me diffent b/c i am not going with the flow. (and no this is nothing bad, it has to do with going to my youth at DFA) i mean everytime i tell someone i am ~thinking~ about going to the youth b/c i like it, they look at me like i am a horrible person and say they dont like it and dont think i should go. But what i am yelling (well thinking in my head at lest) is *HELLO you are so sheltered you can't handle people that might be different from you or what you are used to. You just rather walk away then stop and help, listen to their story, give then a helping hand and maybe be a good influence. They need Jesus just as much as you did, and if we all just walked away b/c you were different from us, then you wouldn't have met Jesus, we have to give them the same chance that you were given* I dont know, maybe i should listent to them and not go to youth and just teach the kids...... but i think i could do some good in youth. I mean seeing 12 year old girls with so much makeup... its sick. It tells me, they think they have to put on so much makeup b/c the world doesn't think they are pretty enough. But they are FANTASTIC just the way God made them. They dont need man made things to make them any prettier. Maybe i could show them that being your self is fun, and is a lot easier then acting like someone else.

 

I dont know,

What do you guys think?

MOOD: Trying To Smile
So my people, today has been.... i suppose a good but yet bad day. I dont really feel like talking about it though. I do want to ask you guys to be praying for something though. I might be stepping back from something i REALLY dont want to b/c i feel God is asking me to, and did i mention i really dont want to do this. I suppose you would say i am giving up something for a while that i would really rather not do. But you and i both know you cant fight with God, well you can, but you will never win thats for sure. So i have put down my fighting attitude and letting God take over, which i should have done a long time ago. BUT i would really appreciate if you (my fantastic friends) would please be praying for me during this time, that i dont go back to my old ways and start to fight with God again, that i will win this victory over the devil, that i will do Gods will instead of mine. Well thanks and i hope you guys have a fantastic rest of this fine day.

Mood: Not Smiling

So today made me smile. (yeah thats my new thing, i say "that makes me smile" its fun to say) anyways today was so much fun! I went to classes *that didn't make me smile* and then i went to Lillys *that made me smile* we got really bored and she was like "do you wanna do our make up craZy and take pictures" and i was like "Oh Yeah" lol so thats how it started THEN we kinda got craZy with it.... but it was so much fun!
And after pictures Lilly washed it all off and got all pretty and i stayed in my makeup and just changed into my T-shirt :) so yeah i walked around in my CRAZY make-up and one sock all day. Then we had to go pick up the Pizza for dinner and she was like "hey will you wear that in" i was like "HECK YES I WLL...how much will you pay me:P" but i ended up wearing it in. it was so much fun :) It made me smile :)
So yeah, i had a FANTASTIC day with Lilly, how about you people? How was your day? Did it make you smile :) lol

lol this looks like fun :) haha

Jarred is a Cow-Boy at heart :)
hahaha (inside j/k)

And thanks to Jarred... i have a new name.. Miles! dont ask my way its Miles, you just have to understand Jarred is a strange cracker :) haha

Hey my people, i need  yalls help(and yes i said yall) I have been over loaded with school, and i could drop a class but i dont want to get behind. SO i am trying my hardest to keep up with all my school and ontop of that..i dont get sleep at night! SO i really need yalls prayers! Thank You Ever So Much

i got my hair cut :) Yaaaa Me :P lol

an AMAZING song

He talks kinda slow sometimes, and its kinda long....but i liked it! it was pretty nifty so..i thought i would share it with all you people :P

OMGosh! Today has only started but has been so full of bad stuff its sad. I guess its not "bad Stuff" persay...... but it sure has been full..and its only 11 something.
Ok so i was supposed to ride my horses this morning, while Lilly was at some thing. I got up right before she left talked to her tell she left THEN i went outside to get my horse. Well as i get around the side of the house i see Miles (a REALLY fast wild but tame 7 or 8 year old gilding ) trotting up the hill to the house. Now you have to understand, he is THE smartiest but dumest horse EVER. He knows when you want to catch him and when you want to feed him..... and he knew i was going to cach him since he was out. Luckily i had brought some feed for Kate and that would help me catch Miles.The two things he loves most are Running and FOOD!! so it took me about 15 to 20 minutes of walking up and down a hill, walking back and forth, and trying to get close to him. Now he would eat the food, but right before i could get the lead-rop around his neck he would run away, so then i would have to run wide around him and try again. SO you get the picture by the time i was done catching Miles i was pretty dang tired. I brought him to the barn and headed back to get Kate, i knew i wasn't going to get to ride b/c by then it was to hot to make my baby run around with a saddle on. I at lest wanted to groom her, it took about 5 minutes to catch my lovley baby girl. After grooming Kate, Miles was freaking out b/c he HATED (yes HATED) being in the barn where he couldn't run and be free. As some of you know, There is a little paddock behind the barn. So smart me thinks *hey i can put him out there so he can eat and run a little* and i was right, as soon as i put Miles in the paddock he took of running. As i was shuting the gait i look up and see his not running away from me, he is running at me.....i through my arms up and he turned, but didn't stop, he just ran into the fence. (i think he was going to jump but decided not to at the last moment, STUPID STUPID horse) but some how he didn't brake the fence, so i think fast and run to get Kate from in the barn, HOPING if he saw her he would stop long enough for me to catch him. As i am letting her go in the paddock (i couldn't hold her b/c she was trying to run me over) i walk out trying to shut the gait and my own horse runs straight at me, but stupid me, instead of throughing my hands up i duck and move out of the way like any humen would. Ahhh so my horse was out, with no halter and running way from Miles, which made him really mad, so AGAIN he runs into the fence. (why again do i love horses??? i have no idea) Anyways this story isn't over yet people, i ran into the barn luckily Mr. Keny and Brandon were in the barn working on cars. I asked them to help and they were more then happy to. I was really happy and mad at that moment, I had to big strong guys about to help me catch my horses, but i was mad b/c they had almost run over me. After Miles almost killing Brandon ( ha i have never seen a guy run for his life like that lol ) by charging him, Kate disappearing  and showing up at the paddock were she was supposed to be, and running ALL over the place in the hot hot hot weather. I ended up catching both horses and yelling at Miles, b/c everytime i filled up his water bucket he duped it over. Grrrr horses
well that was my day, who was yours?????

So i had to write a paper for History Class. I was supposed to write it to a group of NonChristians and try to tell them about Jesus...But i couldn't use 

Scripture or push my faith on them. SO this is what i came up with. I kinda like it. Not my best work but hey its pretty good * i think * well i was bored so i put it on here.

1~Have you had some hard times?

2~Or been hurt by someone you loved?

3~Stabbed in the back by a friend?

4~Lost a loved one?

5~Have you been moved from the place you called home, to a house that seems lonely?

6~Know what peer-pressure is firsthand?

 

I can say yes to every question I have just asked you, and many more. I’m not going to go into my life story because then you might think I want you to feel sorry for me. And that’s just the opposite, I want you to know how I got through all that without doing something stupid, running away, doing drugs, or resorting to alcohol. I suppose I should say "who" got me through it, instead of "how". I will tell you a little about myself before I tell you about "who" got me through my troubles.

I’m just an ordinary girl. I stand 5 feet and 1 inch tall, I have brown/blonde hair, I have blue eyes and braces. I’m in love with horses and I am home-schooled. Yeah, yeah you might think home-schoolers are weird, all I have to say is 5 little words "I Get To Sleep In" and I’m just as smart and maybe smarter then some kids in public school. I try to help out at my local church, watching kids. I love baby-sitting, just like any ordinary girl does. So you get the picture I am your average Jo.

Now here is the part where you learn "who" got me through my troubles, hard times, crying nights, mad hits to my pillow, and screaming fights with myself. He is not your average Jo. No His not my boyfriend and His not my brother, nor is it my father. So who could it be….that’s for you to figure out and for me to know. I’ll just tell you how He got me through it all. First of all He gave me a FANTASTIC family I can lean on. Second He wrote a book for me to read every day that made getting through that much easier, now I can’t lie to you, there were days I didn’t read the book He wrote me. And there were days I didn’t go to His house on Sunday mornings, but on those days my life seemed to get a little harder and more complicated.

Getting to the point, let me give you an instance where He helped me through a hard time. Let’s go with when we moved. You might think moving is not a big deal, but to me it was. You see the house I used to live in when I was a kid, was a dream home. No it wasn’t a big house with a big yard, pool, and the red front door. It was a little Blue home (not a house, a home) on top of a hill. But the memories made in that house will never be forgotten. Life seemed so easy there, but once we moved it was like a chain reaction of bad things happening one after another. We moved a bunch of times after that blue house. And ever since then I have yet to live in a house that felt like a home. During the chain reaction of hard times I kept crying out asking "WHY?". And ever time I felt like I was talking to thin air. But not once did I give up on Him. And when I hit 11 I cried out and He replied me, he held my hand and walked me through the valley of darkness (so to speak). And still to this day we are walking through the valley of darkness. But I can see the light shining in the distance, He has yet to let go of my hand, and I know He never will.

Have you figured out who I am talking about yet? He is not your average Jo, you can’t meet Him walking down the street. I am SO glad I didn’t give up , because if I did, I would be walking through the valley of darkness alone.

Are You Walking Through The Valley Of Darkness Alone?...... you don’t have to be alone.

I thought i would say
"I had a FANATSTIC birthday..and thanks for the Coments" :)

OMGosh OMGosh OMGosh OMGosh....
So its kinda a long story and i dont feel like going into it BUT i got a camera!!!!! I'm so happy! Yaaaaa !
And i thought i was going to get anything big...maybe a few cards, some hugs....but no! i got a CAMERA!!! Yaaaaaa




YAAAAAAAAA ME! :P Sorry i'm just really happy :P lol if you cant tell :)