Its 415 am .... almost time to go to work.  Wonder what issues I will be faced with today .... being as I didn't work any over the weekend.  Oh well, time will tell.

....

So I was thinking....   What does it really mean when we are used in our weakness?  I always thought that this meant when we were materially poor, or insignificant in society, or physically weak, etc.  But recently... yes recently and for quite a while now I've been put aback at what I think I'm thinking... Can this idea mean that God shows his strenghths even in our spiritual weaknesses?  For a while I told myself no... because how can pure and evil ever mix to make good? 

Take the Apostle Paul (Saul of Tarsus).  He wrote a big chunk of the New Testament as it is today and yet he talked about how he still wasn't quite where he was suppose to be spiritually, and that thorn in his side issue...  what was it?  Could it be a sin he struggle with?  Something to keep him from becoming too holy... too lofty in thought and judgement...   We can't be for sure, but I think I understand this issue more than ever.

Reading about the news in Israel and Lebanon, the tsunamis, hurricanes, droughts, heat..   the end of the world?  Why should it matter?  This always seems like a wake up call for me, but then again, it shouldn't be about fear of judgement.,   but of true love for God with all your being.  I feel that burning sensations when I say that--that feeling of aliveness that comes when you know what's inside you. 

Why do people think you're so good when you know deep down inside your sins are the worst of them all?  A sin is a sin, but just the way some people view certain things...   This has kept my mouth shut and my eyes down.  Strangely though, it seems like i've made the biggest impact I've ever made in my surroundings.

give me your opinion on this


would a devotional that goes along with an episode of south park work?

what do you think is it good or bad

WHAT in the WORLD was THAT about?!?

so, as you guys know...i've been having dreams about the end times for around two weeks. causing me so much pain for the people i know who are lost, that i don't get any more than around 2 hours a night since then. god's placed a burden for the lost on my heart ever since i was called into the ministry. and now that i feel the end times are near, the pain in my heart for them grows every day.

not only have there been things all over the news about possible wars starting, and of course the tsunamis, earthquakes, and crazy weather we've been having...but my pastor has preached two weeks in a row about the end times. not only that, but there have been pastors on television and the radio...mostly all talking about the end times or the rapture.

i don't think this is a coincidence.

here's the scripture pastor lowrance taught on today:

Matthew 24:4-51 (New International Version)

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society

 4 Jesus answered: "Watch out that no one deceives you. 5 For many will come in my name, claiming, 'I am the Christ,^[a]' and will deceive many. 6 You will hear of wars and rumors of wars, but see to it that you are not alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. 7 Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places. 8 All these are the beginning of birth pains.

 9 "Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me. 10 At that time many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other, 11 and many false prophets will appear and deceive many people. 12 Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, 13 but he who stands firm to the end will be saved. 14 And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.

 15 "So when you see standing in the holy place 'the abomination that causes desolation,'^[b] spoken of through the prophet Daniel—let the reader understand— 16 then let those who are in Judea flee to the mountains. 17 Let no one on the roof of his house go down to take anything out of the house. 18  Let no one in the field go back to get his cloak. 19 How dreadful it will be in those days for pregnant women and nursing mothers! 20 Pray that your flight will not take place in winter or on the Sabbath. 21 For then there will be great distress, unequaled from the beginning of the world until now—and never to be equaled again. 22 If those days had not been cut short, no one would survive, but for the sake of the elect those days will be shortened. 23 At that time if anyone says to you, 'Look, here is the Christ!' or, 'There he is!' do not believe it. 24 For false Christs and false prophets will appear and perform great signs and miracles to deceive even the elect—if that were possible. 25 See, I have told you ahead of time.

 26 "So if anyone tells you, 'There he is, out in the desert,' do not go out; or, 'Here he is, in the inner rooms,' do not believe it. 27 For as lightning that comes from the east is visible even in the west, so will be the coming of the Son of Man. 28 Wherever there is a carcass, there the vultures will gather.

 29 "Immediately after the distress of those days
   " 'the sun will be darkened,
      and the moon will not give its light;
   the stars will fall from the sky,
      and the heavenly bodies will be shaken.'^[c]

 30 "At that time the sign of the Son of Man will appear in the sky, and all the nations of the earth will mourn. They will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of the sky, with power and great glory. 31 And he will send his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds, from one end of the heavens to the other.

 32 "Now learn this lesson from the fig tree: As soon as its twigs get tender and its leaves come out, you know that summer is near. 33 Even so, when you see all these things, you know that it^[d]is near, right at the door. 34 I tell you the truth, this generation^[e] will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened. 35 Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.

The Day and Hour Unknown

 36 "No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son,^[f] but only the Father. 37 As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. 38 For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark; 39 and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away. That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. 40 Two men will be in the field; one will be taken and the other left. 41 Two women will be grinding with a hand mill; one will be taken and the other left.

 42 "Therefore keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come. 43 But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into. 44 So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.

 45 "Who then is the faithful and wise servant, whom the master has put in charge of the servants in his household to give them their food at the proper time? 46 It will be good for that servant whose master finds him doing so when he returns. 47 I tell you the truth, he will put him in charge of all his possessions. 48 But suppose that servant is wicked and says to himself, 'My master is staying away a long time,' 49 and he then begins to beat his fellow servants and to eat and drink with drunkards. 50 The master of that servant will come on a day when he does not expect him and at an hour he is not aware of. 51 He will cut him to pieces and assign him a place with the hypocrites, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

---

yeah. we need to get ready and stay ready for his coming.
this is gonna be one heck of a ride...
hold on.

so here's the deal i am doing a fantasy football team and i need an idea for a team name! any idea???

i guess i will now go to sleep! LOL

So the Cookie Store's power went out late Friday night.

And didn't get fixed until 11:30ish Saturday morning.  And the power outage took with it our soda fountain's ability to function.

This, my friends, was a bad bad thing to happen on a Saturday.

Luckily, when I got to work today, all was functional once more.

Unfortunately, we had many douche bags who didn't understand signals like lights being turned off and metal gates pulled down over doors, or us wrapping trays of cookies in giant plastic bags.

It's almost 6:15.  "Are you open?"  I get asked this about four times.  And becuase of store policy, I have to say yes.  And unwrap whatever trays whatever cookies these people want are on.

If you're ever in the mall as it's closing, please don't come up to me and ask me for cookies.  Because I will give them to you.  Only I will most likely throw them at your eyes as if they were ninja stars.

I had the notion that you'd make me change my ways
My bad habits would be gone in a matter of days
I had the feeling that you'd open up my eyes
To a whole new world that had since been in disguise

But that day will most likely never come for me
And it's just my luck to end up getting stuck
To everything you are

So tonight I'll sit and pick apart your pictures
And overanalyze your words
But the truth is that I've never fallen so hard
It's taking everything in me
Just to forget your sweater so far

I had the notion that you'd make me forget the world
But your undecisive mind shows me that
You are "just another girl"
I had the feeling that those looks you gave me were real
What if I ripped your heart apart at the seams
Maybe then you'd know how I feel

But that day will most likely never come for me
And it's just my luck to end up getting stuck
To everything you are

So tonight I'll sit and pick apart your pictures
And overanalyze your words
But the truth is that I've never fallen so hard
It's taking everything in me
Just to forget your sweater so far

I can honestly say
That I never, ever, ever felt this way
Your lips, your eyelashes, your skin
These are the parts of your body
That cause my comatose to begin

I can honestly say
That I never, ever, ever felt this way
Your lips, your eyelashes, your skin
These are the parts of your body
That cause my comatose to begin

I will sleep another day
I don't really need to anyway
What's the point when my dreams are infected
With words you used to say
I will breathe in a moment
As long as I keep my distance
I wouldn't want to go messing anything up

So don't go worrying about me
It's not like I think about you constantly
So maybe I do, but that shouldn't affect
Your life anymore
I knew it the moment you walked into the door

So don't go worrying about me
It's not like I think about you constantly
So maybe I do, but that shouldn't affect
Your life anymore
I knew it the moment you walked into the door

I'll let you get the best of me
Because there's nothing else that I do well
I'll let you get the best of me
Because there's nothing else that I do well
I'll be the giver and you'll be the taker
I guess that's how this one's gonna go I'll be the giver and you'll be the taker
You've got me down on my knees and I proclaim
All hail the heartbreaker

Yea, but look what I can do....
Gimp power.

I just got back from cross country camp last night. It was the best year ever! Here are some pictures...

Max and I were homonus omonused together. Btw, homonus omonusing is when Salty declares two people a camp couple.

Salty squirted everyone with water...teeheehee

The senior girls on the scariest rock ever! (John Rock) Which my camera almost rolled down and off of it...not good!

The whole cross country team on John Rock.

Trying on some crazy hats the night we went to Walmart.

Michelle and I trying to suck out the extra juice out of the ice thingy.

Sam and I practicing for the three legged race. Do I have to mention we lost?

Max and I trying to win the challenge where you put a Mentos in Diet Coke and try putting the cap on as fast as you can! We lost, diet coke in the eyes doesn't feel pleasant!

Hooker Falls!

The last night all the girls slept in one room.

The girls!

The Homonus Omonus couples.

The girls chilling in the hot yub with Salty.

Jessa and Nicky's fortress keeping invaders out of their bed...somehow I managed to get over it while I was sleep walking...

North Carolina is soo pretty!

hey i'm new at this so i might need some help?

SEVEN MORE DAYS UNTiiL WE LEAVE FOR HLUB.

ii STARTED PACKiiNG. ii HAVE EiiGHT OUTFiiTS RiiGHT NOW. THATS iiT.

ii NEED LiiKE TWO//THREE OUTFiiTS PER DAY.

THATS ATLEAST TWELVE OUTFiiTS, PLUS PJ'S AND FREE TiiME CLOTHES.

SO YEAH, ii STiiLL HAVE A TON OF PACKiiNG TO DO.

iiM GETTiiNG PRETTY EXCiiTED ABOUT iiT. iiDK WHY. LOL.

BUT iiM PRETTY SiiKED FOR KUTLESS<3

YEAH. ii NEED TO PACK A LOTTTT.

ii EVEN TOOK PiiCTURES OF MY OUTFiiTS, ii HAVE LiiKE CLOTHES, PURSE, SHOE, JEWLERY, AND EVERYTHiiNG BUT MAKEUP && HAiiR PLANNED OUT. HAHA.

ii LOVE PACKiiNG, ii JUST HATE UNPACKiiNG, iiTS LiiKE AHH. LOL.

A compelling or constraining influence,
such as a moral force on the mind or world, PRESSURE.
To be undecided or skeptical,
to tend to disbelieve and distrust, to regard as unlikely, that’s DOUBT.
The condition of being insufficient or falling short,
decline in strength or effectiveness, FAILURE.
The instinct to run, to back away, or give up,
to need, want, reach, steal,
the feeling to always want more, and to take more,
the loss of breath at the sight of a car accident,
to drive by, never being able to feel satisfied,
and to reject anyone who tries, and this is my life.

i went to a musical last night in woodbury...it was pretty funny stuff...but the whole time i couldnt help but just keep looking off at this old man. . .

wrinkled and gray, hands folded in his lap, smirk on his face. . .his wife was sitting close to him and he looked so happy. he was simply satisfied..

i couldnt help but think about....just...who im going to be next to years and years from now...who i might be helping out of a seat or who will be helping me...and what kind of person i will be when ive lived so much more than i have..what kind of memories will i have made?

love -kels

waiting on a bagel in line today this song played..

When your long day is over
And you can barely drag your feet
When the weight of the world
Is on your shoulders
I know what you need
Bring it on home to me
You know I know you
Like the back of my hand
You know I'm gonna do
All that I can right here
Gonna lie with you
Till you fall asleep
When the morning comes
I'm still gonna be right here

I saw Les Miserables at the Fabulous Fox Theater in St. Louis - it's the best musical in existence, no competition.

Eponine is still my dream role.

The day before we saw Les Mis my parents and I toured Washington University in St. Louis while my brother and sister went to Six Flags.  Wash U was pretty impressive, although it doesn't seem like their English program is as strong as a lot of other good schools.  The campus is beautiful and the students seem really interesting, though.  And both my parents are alumni, which is the main reason we visited.

I also had my first college interview, which was more than a little nervewracking.  It ended up going well, although when I get nervous I sometimes start talking too fast and I forget what I mean to say and instead babble on about nothing.  I kept this to a minimum, I think.  So that was good.

Tomorrow we head out to yearbook camp, with our pitifully diminished staff of six.  Or maybe five.  I don't even know anymore.  We can't seem to keep anybody.  In fact, we may end up taking one or two freshmen at the start of next year just to beef up the staff a bit.

I am in love with The Decemberists.

And also Once on This Island.


And also you.

<3

Christina

Hey,

i just got back from atlanta yesterday! it was completely awesome i loved it! we spent 12hrs. at SIX FLAGS!

There were a couple problems yesterday though!...anyways i like this guy and he liked this other girl and she doesn't like him...i am not going to go into detail with who it is and all but i am wondering what to do...if i should tell him that i like him and hope he likes me back...or keep it to myself and until he finds out???????? PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!

please leave me a remark or message me or something

I am very happy to announce that I have successfully made two copies of my video onto CDs, one which shall me mailed in for the contest, and another which I shall keep for my own use to keep (and show off of course)! Turns out the DVD burner was pointless so it looks like we'll be taking that baby back. Anyhow, it doesn't even seem real almost... that it's finally working for me! Please pray pray pray that I win... ok that sounds bad and selfish I suppose... ha ha... but it would just be really awesome! So yeah... if you want to see it... um... I suppose you'll have to come visit me sometime, or I you. I think it'll only play on computers, but at this point I don't care... as long as it plays somewhere! Although I'm also thinking about burning CD to DVD using my mom's co-worker's DVD burner. But yeah... I'm happy that it works now!   

one of the best bands that made the best night of my life.

yay!!! Sweet 16!!! w00t w00t finally my birthday came today so far has just been so amazing like i can't even explain how great it's been and it's still not over my bestest friend is taking me out for dinner yay!!!!




Love Always
*Danielle*

Had a great family vacation in Florida.

We went skim-boarding.  Here's getting ready to throw the board:

Here's me laughing off the pain after i wiped out:

We flew a kite:

ate at fun restaurants:

built a sand castle:

went putt putting:

we even swam all the way out to the sand bar(about 300 yards out) to look for sand dollars. we didnt stay to long cause it was 12 feet deep and we were being pulled out to sea once we got out there.

but yeah...overall it was a great vacation.  I'm glad to be back, but i will certainly miss the beach  ;-)

I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming....

I followed thru on my decision ... NO work this weekend.  The family won.  Yeah.  Saturday was spent hashing and having a farewell party at our house (see pics), while Sunday was spent at Hotel Tropico having lunch including lobster (yeah) ... and then resting.  See the pics on that too. [ and don't foreget to see the pic on my best friend, Tom ].

I posted some pics from the last few days. The "farewells" are really gearing up with Decy and the girls leaving on Saturday.  Already this coming week we have every night booked and I think Decy has some lunches booked.  This doesn't include the approx 12-15 good-byes she had in late June and early July as folks left town and weren't returning before Decy left.

While it might seem that all we do is eat, drink, and party, that is not the case.  Its just that we have a very broad group of friends that cuts across companies, cultures, countries, and interests.

It is hard to say good-bye to so many friends. It hurts.  I know it hurts Decy and the girls more than me.  I am use to good-byes ... and none hurt like the pain when I have to tell my sons good-bye.

Right or wrong, I do try to rationalize the pain .... I've come to the decision that it is better to hurt when one leaves than to not hurt at all.  You see, if you hurt ... then you have made an impact on other people and they have made an impact on you ... the pain is the recognition of that "connection and bond".  As someone famous once said ... it is better to love and to have lost than to have never loved.  STILL, it hurts.

Tomorrow .... I work - starting at 515am.  I will stop at 7pm ... as there is yet again another farewell ... hosted by the Pakistani's here in Angola.

ciao ciao.

i havent written in forever. sorry.

i'm really bummed. part of me cant wait to go back to knoxville, but the other part of me tells me that it wont be much better. i'll just have something else to keep my busy.

i feel depressed. i dont know why things happen the way they do.

i havent given up on God cause i know he hasnt given up on me, but i wish i could be happy again like i used to be.

i'm not some doopey sad depressed person, i just get down when everything seems to go wrong. and it happens all the time lately

piece

Daniel seems to be on the mend.  The diarrhea is much better, and consequently, the rash seems to be much better.  He still has some disturbingly red patches, but most of his diaper area is normal skin color now.  The cotton training pants have helped immensely.  They are, of course, much messier than diapers, but if they help his skin, I don't mind cleaning up some messes.  We spread a shower curtain on the living room floor and put his toys on there so that he won't make a mess on the carpet, but he seems strangely determined to be everywhere but on the curtain.  Oh well - the carpet will be replaced in a few weeks, and for now, it's not too hard to clean up after him.  Thank you for keeping him in your prayers, and please keep it up!

i've been thinking about funerals a lot lately. particularly my own.

as morbid as it sounds, have you ever thought about that? if you got to watch your own funeral, what would it look like? who would be there? what would people say?

i have a t-shirt that says, "live your life so that the preacher won't have to lie at your funeral."

will the preacher have to lie at yours?

i wonder about mine.

i'm going to do better, though. i promise.

lastly, i have a few requests for my funeral. so just to put these out there:

#1. i want to be buried in white. i also want everyone who comes to wear white instead of black.

#2. i want the songs "i'll fly away" and "swing low, sweet chariot" sung. not some modernized or saddened version. i want them in all their gospel splendor.

#3. i want to be buried in tennessee. i don't care where i end up in life, tennessee is home and always will be. i'm proud of my state and her history and i want my body to end up where it began.

i hope this post wasn't too depressing for you. just some stuff that's been on my mind.

i love you.

do you have any specific funeral requests?

july 29 = dci southeastern championships in atl. mother &i are going.

&happy birthday to danielle, one of my bestfriends. she`s 16 but that whore doesnt get her license yet. haha. :]

Woohoo Prague!  We just got to Prague today after leaving from a tiny Austrian city near the border.  We also got to opportunity to look at a castle on the Czech side of the border.  It was pretty cool.  There was also a really old synagogue.  We then had to leave to get on the road to go to Prague.  We are staying in a hostel on the Baptist Seminary campus. 

Tonight we will go into the town and see what it has to offer.  Not to be biased, but my favorite city is Wroclaw.  I haven't found another city like it so far and I don't think I will.  I left part of my heart in Poland and I'm afraid I'll have to go back to get it...(wink wink). 

We will spend tomorrow in Prague and then leave the day after to drive to Berlin.  After Berlin we will fly to Rome and then hang out in Italy for a few days.  After that it will be time for Paris.  In Paris we will go to Disneyland Paris!!!  I can't wait.  Should be good times.  As most of you should know...I am a Disney fan and love the whole atmosphere of Disney.

Oh, and we just checked the weather...it is supposed to be thunderstorming all day tomorrow (our one full day in Prague) so hopefully it won't be too bad.  Either way we will survive.  I just don't want to drive back to Berlin with it thunderstorming.

Please pray for safe travel and good times!!!

This is a new song I wrote last night...
Its called Callie...


I thought everything was perfect,
But what I didnt know, was what was boiling in your head.
I knew it was coming,
I saw it in your sad green eyes.
I just didnt wanna believe it.
This couldnt me true,
I had to wake myself from this dream.

Because you everything to me,
and I couldnt have you.
You were everything I wanted,
You were everything I wanted.

What I saw that night,
Was what I didnt wanna see.
But I knew it,
When I looked into those sad green eyes.
I wanted for you to talk to me,
But you held it together so long.
I had to wake myself fromt his dream.
This couldnt be true.
I just didnt wanna belive it.

Because you everything to me,
and I couldnt have you.
You were everything I wanted,
You were everything I wanted.

Can you feel the stillness in the air,
Can you feel the heavyness of my breathe.
Do you see the sadness in my eyes.
Do you feel my loneliness,
Without you by my side.

Because you weere everything to me,
and I couldnt have you.
You were everything I wanted,
Because you were everything to me,
and I counldnt have you.
You were everything to me,
and I couldnt have you.
You were everything I wanted,
You were everything,
I wanted.

So, today is 6 monthes for me and Jonathan!  I don't know about any of ya'll but that is kind of a big deal to me.  Honestly, he's my first boyfriend ever.

---

I met our new soccer coach yesterday.  He seems really nice.  He's from MTSU, seems sort of young, and from Whales.  So, he has an accent.  He doesn't like to run when not entirely neccassary (sp), and he uses a whislte cause he doesn't like to yell.  My select coach is still going to be our assisstant coach.  That's good cause he knows what we are all capable of.  Let's see if we can win any this year.  Most of us our being very optimistic which I see as a good thing.

God Bless!

BOATING!!!!!!

sad thing i wont be able to skii today-sad face-
oh well cuz next week i'll be on the lake for a week!!!!!!
wootness!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am happy
i love going to the lake but not as much as the ocean
the lake comes 2nd
lol

well i am out soo later people

                megan

I feel like killing myself tonight!! Im in a really deep depression. Something just happened and it shattered my heart or whats left of it. Its like the song by Nich Lachey "Whats left of me". And this song as well:

You brought that bottle home in a paper sack


you Drew the blinds and locked the doors


And there's nothing but empty there inside that glass


So you pour a little more


And there's no one there to judge you


At least that's what you tell yourself, but



Chorus:


Don't you know


Nobody drinks alone


Every demon, every ghost


From your past


And every memory you've held back


Follows you home


Nobody drinks alone



You remember whiskey on your daddy's breath


So you always stick to wine


And you scared your little brother half to death


You just kept it all inside


You can hear your mama cryin'


Only now she cries for you, and



Don't you know


Nobody drinks alone


Every demon, every ghost


From your past


And every memory you've held back


Follows you home


Nobody drinks alone



Though you're lonely


Hey don't you let that feelin' fool ya



(

Chorus:


Don't you know


Nobody drinks alone


Every demon, every ghost


From your past


And every memory you've held back


Follows you home


Nobody drinks alone



Nobody drinks alone

Basically I just feel like shit. Like my whole life ,or whatever there is of it,is now gone. Maybe im exagerating but thats how i feel I feel like basically someone pulled my heart out such as at YL camp they talked about. And as soon as I let them hold it in there hands and let my guard down and let them in they throw it back at me. I know to the person that did this it isnt doing justice. Shes a sweet girl amazing. Beautiful I felt like God really sent me the best he had ever made. She was everything I ever wanted. As one line of Vertical Horizons songs say "Shes everything you ever wanted".  And to be honest like always I see the signs. I knew the magic was lost. I knew we were falling apart. I just didnt want to believe it. I mean like everyone. I just didnt want to believe that this amazing girl wasnt supposed to last. I feel like what the fuck God why even allow her to date me or to wanna date me if this is all that will happen. I mean why? And I know he has a plan but I mean why do this why let her break my heart into pieces as Lynkan(sp) Park says in a line. I just dont know she was amazing she has definetly though been the best I ever had which is a song as well. I just dont know!!!

you care only for your self. You fell guilty not helping

Okay, so I started getting philosophical earlier (usually a bad thing), and I was thinking about the role which religion plays in the life of modern man.  I realized that religion as a whole is dying.  Islam is truly dead - the Muslims don't recognize it, but it is falling apart.  Hinduism is even more dead than Islam.  Christianity and Buddhism are dying.  The reason that these religions are dead/dying is that mankind as a whole are moving beyond the need for them.

DISCLAIMER: Before I go any further, I just want to make a few points clear:
1. I am not saying that these religions are false.  I personally believe that Christianity is true.
2. I am not saying that these religions are totally unneeded.  With the exception of Hinduism's caste system, I believe that organized religion can still play a beneficial role in the social development of mankind.

Anyway, religion is becoming "outdated" in a way.  Mankind is progressing to the next step.  As I thought about the spiritual development of man, I charted out a very basic progression:

Ritual/Tradition > Religion/Liturgy > Ideas > Godhood

Basically, it's taking a step backward, into a more basic form of existence, in which being God precedes the existence of all other steps.  I believe that the next step of man is to live by ideas.  Long ago, man lived by ritual and tradition, participating in human sacrifices and the like.  As we developed, religions and more complex spiritual traditions took the places of those.  Religion developed to meet the needs of modernizing man, but there is coming a point when religion will no longer be necessary.  The next step is that of Ideas.  After Ideas, if any progression can take place beyond the most basic concepts of life, then man would become God.  Either that, or there will be no further progression.  I opt for the latter, but that's just my beliefs.  Some people do believe that Man is/will be God, but I don't.

Anyway, man will live by ideas.  Many are already taking steps into this realm of existence, but it's a relatively inhospitable metaphysical world whose inhabitants are met with hostility by a majority of their fellow man.  Look at the progression above.  Ritual is a dumbed down "Religion for the Masses."  Religion is a dumbed down "Ideas for the Masses."  As mankind develops, religion is dropping away to ideas.  Each person must choose which idea(s) to live by.  They can be Love, Hate, Compassion, Indifference, Loyalty, Honesty, Dishonesty, etc.  Some are moral, some immoral, some amoral.


Well, that's a snippet of what I was thinking.  I'm going to bed.

I get frustrated because every single time I think of something to say on this jig, I lose interest or forget what it was.  Amongst the cursory profile changes, I haven't done much with this site, I guess.  Problem is, if I told you everything I thought at this time, most of you wouldn't understand.  It'd just be passed off as some arrogant attempt to say something esoteric or depressing.  I don't know what to say anymore other than life is weird.

i never really know what i'm gonna get.

so last night

i go to hollywood video, and who do i see, but Kevin Krapf, who i haven't seen in a million and two years. and he just gave me a big hug, and we listened to his band, Sugar Vibe, who are really really super duper good. like seriously talented.

nayways.

that was pretty dang cool. life is good right now. and i am actually kinda looking forward to going back to school. i miss my friends, and i think mr. vaughn is gonna do good things for the school. so question: which is worse, telling someone how you feel about them, and them not feeling the same, or that person never knowing how you feel? also, i want to know how many people know my middle name. what is it? much love to you all ---Cari X. Jennings....(???)

... and pretty much everything else in the collection!

yummy. who loves target?!

wow..been a while since i have written in here..

Gosh..a lot has happened..first off

Birthday in 6 days...

ehh, everything is messed up right now, and i don't want to go into detail about on here..if you really really really must know about it..call me or something.

<3.

well camp was fun...new found loves. new friends. old friends. new memories. new perspectives.

sara & i

charlie and me

hardcore

i love her

no air conditioning...

chad

JT

me and charlie after the shaving cream fight...

me and erica

Senior Night

 a good surprise =)

ha

im going to miss her...

Pave the Way.

yes I ran into Sonic's menu thing. I know I'm cool.

hahahahaha... =( my poor car.. this has been its 4th wreck & I've only been driving 2 months.. haha

Yep, I have a Myspace. Do the usual URL blather but type in cherokee_pirate. Or type Pirate in the search bar and look for the Japaneese symbol, what Japan has to do with the Cherokee or pirates I will never know.

Remember that story about the woman who swallowed the cat to catch the bird,  she swallowed the bird to catch the spider...?

I started teeting again, so I got a runny nose,  so I got an ear infection, so I got antibiotics, so I got diarrhea, so I got a diaper rash!  And not just normal diaper rash!  I hurts worse than anything.  Mommy said it was so bad that I was bleeding.  Now Mommy and Daddy are using some special cream.  It's hurting less now, and I'm feeling better.  I also get some awesome grape juice called Pedialyte.  It doesn't taste like any grape I've ever eaten, but it's yummy!  Since I'm still sick, Mommy and Daddy say I can sleep late in the morning, since it wouldn't be good to take me to the nursery.  I'll miss the other kids, but it'll be fun to play with Mommy and Daddy some more.

Mommy and Daddy have decided to use cotton training pants for a  while I still have a rash.  Something about helping me stay dry.  They feel cool, but they are... messy.  I think it's somehow related to the shower curtain on the floor in the living room.  Whatever I do, I'm supposed to make sure I do NOT play over the curtain.  I'd hate to make a mess on the nice clean shower curtain.  I think the carpet is much easier to clean.  They keep testing me by returning me to the shower curtain, but I make them proud by showing that I listen and returning promptly to the carpet.

Lately I've been exceptionally cute.  Mommy and Daddy have insisted on lots of pictures, even enlisting Aunt Sarah and Uncle Todd to serve as photographers.  I suppose I could post some of those.  My adoring public deserves them.

I Love KIDZ BOP!!!

~NUFF SAID!!!!

God must be trying to teach me patience, but I sure don't remember asking for it!

Yesterday I edited my video (again) on my aunt's computer. Then today we go out and buy a DVD burner (which isn't exactly $20 or anything like that) to get the video from the computer to a DVD. Well, to make a long story short, that isn't working too well for me.

I think God's trying to help sort out some of those control issues that I have. So three things I have learned thus far:
1.) God is in control, and I am not.
2.) I shouldn't freak out about small stuff.
and 3.) Bill Gates is not my friend.

man i am exhausted! but today has been so much fun! i had to wake up pretty early today (like 6:15) but i went to kohls and got some new shirts and a new pair of jeans.  and then i had to rush home and get ready to go to soccer. so then i picked wendell up and we went to nate's and then on to soccer. thats always lots of fun and it was nice and cool today. the only problem is the goal i accidentally scored for the other team. lol woops...so then we went back to nate's house and had hamburgers and played texas hold em and presidents til like 4:15 and now im home. and hopefully ill get to sleep in tomorrow.

Good afternoon, teenagers. My name is Officer Aaron Roan and I'm here today to talk to you about the dangers of drinking and driving. I'm not going to beat around the bush. If you drink and drive, you will die. From cancer. That's right. If you start drinking and driving, you're going to get cancer and die. Probably from a goat. Think about it. You're drinking. You get in the car. You're feeling a little woozy, so you roll down the windows. You pass out, drive off the road. You wake up screaming. While you're screaming, your car hits a goat. The goats blood gets in your open mouth. Next thing you know, you got yourself a bad case of goat cancer. You don't think it could happen? Guess again. It happened to my partner.

That's right. We were out drinking one night. Five days later, they found his body covered in goat cancer and chocolate sauce. Well, actually, it was far more chocolate sauce than goat cancer. I actually don't think any goat cancer was involved at all. I made that part up. And the chocolate sauce washed right off. He's fine now. But the point is, it could have been a lot worse! He could have died! What if he had a chocolate allergy? Think about that the next time you drink yourself a gin ricky.

Or think about this: did you know that 100% people who drink will eventually die? Isn't that a staggering statistic? To put that statistic into perspective, look around the room. Everybody in this room who has ever touched an alcoholic beverage raise your hand. Guess what? One day, all of you will be dead. Probably from getting a broom in the caboose. People die that way all the time. They drink a couple of pink ladies, next thing you know, they're tied to a radiator pipe and some Chinese guy is sticking a broom up their caboose. Happened to a good buddy of mine (me). And that's not the kind of thing that washes off, believe me.

I'm still not getting through to you, am I? Alright, let's do a little role playing. You, in the back. Let's pretend youve been out drinking. You've had one too many and you get behind the wheel of your car. So now pretend you're driving along. Good. Now look what happens.

BAM!

I just shot that guy with my service revolver. Why? To illustrate a point. What's the point? I'll tell you. Drinking and driving is exactly like getting shot by a cop at a high school assembly. Anyway, why don't we get some of the football players to carry that fellow to the nurse. If somebody has something to staunch the bleeding, that would be great, too. Not your varsity jacket!

Anyway, before I go, I just want to say I hope you all remember what we talked about here today. I hope that, in the future, when you're kicking back another Shanghai sling or what have you and you're feeling a little tipsy, you'll think of me. You'll think of me shooting your classmate and you'll remember - one day you're going to die. Whether it's from goat cancer or chocolate or broom caboose or what have you, you will die. And I will be there pissing on your grave.

                 hip hip hooray!!! tomorrow's my birthday!!! we are goin to the lake with some family tomorrow so i probably wont be on til monday...boo hoo!!!

1.You have a relative, friend, or mentor at Harding.
2.You know what Fort God and Six Flags over Jesus is.
3.Your bible comes equipped with your birthday, name in gold, and date of baptism.
4.What do you mean instruments in worship?
5.You have a religious experience every time you drive through Corinth, Mississippi.
6.Your bible is in your purse (book bag).
7.Your write both your birthdays in someone’s planner.
8.You have a poster of Jeff Walling.
9.You have a crush on Jeff Walling’s son, Taylor.
10.Three words… Sex Ed Classes.
11.Keith Lancaster doesn’t scare you anymore.
12.You stand next to a hot guy incase you have to huga huga friend huga friend next to ya.
13.M.A. kids automatically get into heaven.
14.You believe your cookie is going to hell because it was sprinkled not submerged.
15.Your ‘‘what I did last summer essay” involves Mexican children or building houses.
16.All your cloths are from old navy or GAP.
17.You wear Birkenstocks year round.
18.Bikini is not in your vocabulary.
19.15+ hour bus trips are a way of life.
20.You have a home-schooled friend that doesn’t bug you.
21.You married someone you grew up with.
22.Retreat romances are not uncommon.
23.You actually like C.S. Lewis.
24.Grits isn’t a breakfast food.
25.You know what the Bison is.
26.You sing “Roll the gospel chariot along’’ and put teachers names in the devil verse
27.Yes, vegetables can talk…. And sing!
28.When
Jehovah’s witness’ come to your home and ask you if you have “found
Jesus”, you come to the door naked and say “No I haven’t, why don’t you
come on in and help me look for him?”
29.Instead of playing homemaker, you played communion
30.You marry before you get out of Harding
31.Dissfellowship is your worst fear
32.Your Sunday lunch motto is ‘’Beat the Baptist’’
33. Your daily ponder is “I wonder what the theme for Impact is for this year…”
34.Your brothers are named after apostles
35.The closest you get to dancing is when you sing “you have turned my mourning into dancing!’’
36.The girls always win “Satan was defeated!”
37.Music leads to dancing and dancing leads to making babies!!
38.You still haven’t been kissed and you are going on 25.
39.What happens at Impact stays at Impact
40.Instead of saying ‘Crap!’ you say ‘Snap!’
41.For Christmas you get the New Testament on CD BABY!
42.Instead of Saying OH MY GOD! You say “Oh My Stars”
43.You listen to Josh Groban… and enjoy it.
44.You own at least one shirt with a bible verse on it.
45.You are, have been, or are going to be in a “social club”.
46.You own Harding or Lipscomb apparel.
47.You can complete this sentence… “THREE SWINGS AND A ______”
48.You have skipped chapel before.
49. You know who Neal Pryor is…
50.Your mom went to Harding.
51.Your dad went to Lipscomb.
52.And your brother went to Abilene Christian.
53.YOU ARE IN DEBT…. Because of Harding.
54.You have a relative that lives in Texas.
55.You have been to a “ring ceremony”.
56.You are engaged, and you’re only 22.
57.You get laughed at when you explain you’re future college… and all its rules.
58.You get laughed at more when you explain what a dry county is.
59.You are well educated in BET, but you haven’t seen MTV in years.
60.You have cracked open a wedding magazine… on more than one occasion.
61. You know or love a Rieder.
62.You can finish this sentence: Zeta Rho, date a ___.
63.Your weekend consists of an edited movie in the Benson and sneaking to Heber to two-step.
64.Over half of your friends are married or engaged...and you're a sophomore in college.
65.You threw at least 2 wedding showers for girls on your hall freshman year of college.
66.Your college is fondly known as "The Marriage Factory."
67.You know what happens when you go under the bell tower...alone...and you take alternate routes to avoid it...

So all of four of you understood at least 75% of that. I'm not hardcore CoC, but I couldn't pass this up, lol.

So, I'm at work. Not completely bored, but it's kinda sad that I'm on lunch break and I have nothing to do.

Anti-social? Maybe a little.

To her:

I've like you longer than anyone before,

so why am I ready to give up in an instant?

When I heard your voice over the phone, everything was perfect,

but why is it that I question the feelings I have for you?

When they say nothing about love makes sense,

I believe them.

Because no matter where I aim,

my feelings have no direct target anymore.

Danny

I got my Senior Picture Proofs today!! I think they look really cool! But I cannot decide which four I want. I have narrowed it down to these, but I do not know which ones I want. Any help choosing?

well band started this week and of course being in the clarinet section isnt gonig to be so much fun considering that the one person i strongly dislike is in it and she wont shutup ugh o well but yea the music is really fast and like me and kia we cant play it unlike danny can play at 165 wow! so yea hm. the freshman seem to be doing good except we have this one that has like a really bad tone but everyone is like a-okay! ugh looks like johnathen will be marching this year not looking forward to that either i wonder why he was playing last night.. nvrmnd i dont even want to know. kia said ashley may join band yay one more good clairnet! rachel is at camp and wont get back till tonight i think but yea she is doing band. my mom said that shes glad i didnt go for section leader casue of marrissa she thinks i couldnt handle her and she right i couldnt and i dont want to deal with her so yea sry rachel. so yea, my mom thinks the show is going to be amazing and im like sure so we will see about that! well theres nothing much going on in the life of stephanie campbell. except we are haveing a feista and my mom is really in a rushing mood everyday trying to get the food and everything. so yea you know what i think im going to go practice or maybe get some breakfast because i kinda just got up! leave me comments!
Stephanie

update:

ok so yea my mom and i decided to go get something to eat so i drove us to la siesta we got our seats and order drinks got chips and dip then BAM!! the lights went out so we had to sit till they came on cause by that time it was raining and windy and we didnt really want to go out in that kinda of wheater so yea we  sat sat sat and sat some more had aobut 2 things of chips and boy was it getting hot then i saw my gym taecher and mrs yeager OH NO!!! so i was HEY and mrs.long was like hey and we tlaked a bit then she left and my mom was like thats ome crazy lady do u know her? i said mom.....thats my gym teacher... she had the most funniest reaction then it was silent and all the mexicans were talkin in spanish and i got on my last nerves cause didnt know what they were saying! then BAM the power came back on so we order our food and by that time we were already stuffed from those chipps so we felt missrable so then we went to Sams to get some cups and plates for band i felt so retarted with 3300 cups in the flat bed along with 600 plates and 300 forks and spoons ugh so yea we got to check out and the guy wanted me to put the flatbed in this little whole and i was strunglin with it and everything all these people were laughin at me including my mom i felt so stupid then i broke the sliding doors as i was leaving the place ugh it was horrible so yea that was my night *sighs* this is by far the longest entry i have done in my life!
Stephanie

I hate to say it but I'm pretty sure my 19th birthday was better than my 18th birthday.  I had a 'mocktail' party with 4 girls and 4 boys.  I pulled the party together in 2 days with much help from family and friends so I know of 2 people who I certainly forgot about so I'm sorry about that.  Basically we had hors-doeurves and nonalcoholic beverages.  It was really fun just sitting around visitng and having an overall great time.  Thanks to everyone who came and to all those who wished me a happy birthday.  I'm blessed to have so many awesome friends. 

My Spanish class made, so I'll start teaching next week. I'm pretty excited, but I really don't know where to start. The students range from kindergarden through sixth grade; thankfully, I won't have anymore than fifteen. Another "class" I'll have is Molding Mania--aka, I get paid to sit and make things out of play dough. There are supposed to be two more classes for me to teach, but I haven't been told what they are yet.

I'm pretty much moved into my new room. More information on a movie night/get together will be out in the next week or so, depending on when I get everything organized.

One down, one to go.

do you believe in fairy tales?

do you believe in knights on white horses, damsels in distress, prince charming, or maidens locked away in tall towers?

do you believe in dragons and fairies?

do you believe in happy endings?

do you believe in love at first sight?

do you believe in purity, virtue, and self-sacrifice?

do you believe in helping those who need it, putting others before yourself, and the power of love?

do you believe in love at all?

do you believe in angels, demons, or the devil?

do you believe in the bible and the saints?

do you believe in the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the dead, and one holy Church?

do you believe in God?

santa claus?

the tooth fairy?

maybe children aren't so innocent,

maybe the innocent aren't so naive,

and maybe the naive are the wisest of all.

Today begins my family's last week here in Angola.  Next Saturday they leave ... and I remain behind working for another 4 weeks.  I am going to miss them dearly ... and also recognize I will be "load shifting" a lot of responsibility to Decy to help set things up in Indonesia before I arrive.

In the short run, I have a ton of work to do and am WAY behind.  I should work this weekend to catch up ... if I don't next week is going to be a real issue. (just for the record, I have already worked about 65 hours this week).

However, this IS Decy and the girls last weekend here.

You know what ... even if there is an "issue" at work next week, the world won't come to the end ... I think I will spend time with my family this weekend.

Ciao ciao ...

Hey guys,
this is a mini little art project I was inspired to do tonight.  I was fixing to go to bed when I looked up at the ceiling and saw the amazing color spectrum from one of my cds.  And the writing that goes with this just kind of hit me.. Anyway.. I worked hard on this and I really hope you guys enjoy it..

---

"The Spectrum"

with every light's beam
a certain surface is revealed
and from its dark recesses
it comes out, unconcealed
baring all grudges, flaws,
and blood covered hands
revealing all dark secrets
concealed by man..



the light shines on us

just hoping we find the way
leading us forward
to the realms of a better day
and yet with path revealed
so many still turn their head
it makes me sick
and sometimes wish I were dead..


if only we'd just see that
glimmer upon His eye
that look of hope that'll
sometimes cause us to cry
maybe then, we'd all live
different, yet Christ-like driven lives
We'd all pray for our flaws just
to help all our fellow guys...

but no we just swallow the darkness
and so often say good night...
so many seem to give in
without a fight...
so many go on living
by ignoring what they know is true..
they're sealing their fate
to a non-desirable doom...

I say to you now friend,
I know it's hard, but don't let go..
sometimes the hardest fights,
show from within, what you didn't know..
I've been here once, I've been here
so many times before...
and because of it, makes me fight for
you, all the more....

oh, I know the dances each have their own
distinct and separate moves..
but if I can learn them all, then
I'm sure that you can too...
I've got your back, dear friend
just follow the path of light..
and I'll help you back on track,
should you lose your sight..

but this isn't just for them,
no, it's for me, as much as you
I wish for you all to join me
and how I hope it's soon...
just take my hand, we'll do it together
and maybe, as one, we'll come to find
That loving Creator, Him, The One
Who healed the sick, and cured the blind....

So I'll start with the bad news.  Tonight I was working drive
thru by myself near the end and that is quite a chore in itself.  Well
a pair of guys came through in a truck.  Their order took a while,
because they came around closing time when everything was cooked to
order.  So it was raining outside and I had handed everything out but
their food.  When I came back around the corner it appeared as if the
guy had backed up a little bit.  When I opened the window, his
windshield wiper came flying across the window and shot a good deal of
water at me.  The guys immediately sarcastically stated "Oh s***!  I'm
sorry bro."  His friend was sitting in the passenger seat facing the
other way obviously hiding his laughter.  Some peoples kids.  I found
it someone difficult to say, "No problem, man.  You guys have a nice
night."  If it weren't for the temperence of Christ, how many people
would I have punched in the face?  Plenty.  And you?

On a lighter note.  Steph and I were having a fun conversation
about how our grandparents spoil us even when they can't afford it, or
don't have the means.  Certain grandparents of ours dote on us with
food, while others do it with costly items.  How do your grandparents
spoil you?  Oh, and what do you wanna be called when you become a
grandparent?  Anyone else thought of that yet?  I know it's a little
early for me to be thinking about grandkids much less children, but I
like to plan ahead.  Well that's about all I have for now.  Remarks?

to all of you that helped me out with my last post....THANK YOU....it means alot that you all care so very much. thanks to everyone who told me to be patient and all the advice it helps to know peole understand where i am coming from.....that remark that helped me the most was from megan though and it reads.......You just haven't found the right guy... I know this comment is a little late... Sorry... But there is nothing wrong with you only things wrong with guys... They suck and they don't see you like Becky and I do... But they will... When they are meant to...that is such an awesome statement.....thanks.

beckys bday was awesome i had alot of fun and i hope everyone else did as well.......well im off to bed.

i love you all.

i love the megan

i love the becky

and......i love the brian

Leah

At my mother's inspiring, a rant about the location of the computer in her bedroom.  *Rant.*  ((No mothers were harmed in the making of this rant.  All rights reserved, printed on 100% recycled paper.  "This bill is legal tender for all debts public and private, all rights and privileges thereto pertaining." <-- That was hers.))

Hmmmm, so I went to my friend Leland's apartment to let the TV guys in (Leland being at work), told to be there at 2:00.  Soooo I'm waitinnnnnn', and I'm waitinnnnnnnnn', sitting there with my little magazine.  Long story short, the movers never came, but my phone is missing, so I couldn't know that.  Two very funny moments:

A.) Sitting on the couch w// my magazine, all of a sudden I hear an arrow whistling through the air.  Proceed to fall of couch and try to climb under coffee table.  Turns out to be his "email received" soundclip, which is the "*TWANG*  Message for you, sir," from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

B.) Now stretched out on couch, relaxing, magazine utterly exhausted of all content.  Door flys open and someone comes in.  Aiiiiiiiii!  ...Just the owner of the house.  Heart rate returns to normal at the speed of dormant fungus.  TV men never showed up, so Leland treated me to coffee ((woo-hoo)), fries, and You, Me, and Dupree.  Fun film, highly enjoyable.  :)

Wooooooooooow.  Try going off coffee for several weeks ((too effin' hot)), then having two cups of potent regular within, mmmmmm, sayyyyyy, six hours.  DAMN!  Phew.  I could run around the block... Or do horrible things to Tori while she's asleep.  It's been tempting lately.  I'm thinking something involving fur clippers...

You ever really randomly had a huge craving for a glass of wine, and maybe a cigarette?  And you don't smoke??  More the glass of wine, than anything.  Something juicy, with berry notes.

Okay, I should probably stop confessing things like that in a public venue.

And nattering on about inconsequential things, like sibling vendettas and the restorative powers of coffee.

By the way, if you have a chocolate craving and consider making frosting out of regular sugar, cocoa powder, butter, and milk... Don't.  I am seriously contemplating sticking a spoon down my throat, or something.  You will regret this decision, feel generally gross, and your mother will have no sympathy ((she'll regret this when I die early, mark it)).  Make, like, a spoonful-worth.  Not a soup-bowl's worth.

I'll regret every single above paragraph in the morning, when I'm sobered of caffeine.

But right now, dammit if it isn't fun!

I'm finally 18.....

I'll write my thoughts later...

I've been practicing this technique lately that allows my metaphysical being to affect my physical being (i.e. my mind affecting my body).  For example, when I have a headache, I have been able to end the headache through thought.  I'm still not sure why that works, but it does.  Heartburn works much the same way, or, at least, following the same basic principles.  Everything from itches to muscle cramps, actually.  Anyway, I don't know why I just posted this.  Guess I wanted to say it to someone.

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 - alright, i got to get rid of all this stuff.
 - what stuff?
 - all of this crap in my pants.
[me, aaron, me; after leaving Steak and Shake]

So this storm happened today, right? Old Time Pottery was without power for 25 mintues and everything was running off batteries. (The first time the lights went out, it was really dark, when they came back on Mallory and I were holding each other, twas funny.) They batteries only go for 30 minutes and right before they were going to run out of power, the store came back to life.

I was pissed.

I'm in a bad funk. I'm not really liking anybody at the moment, and I seem to be pissed at everyone, including myself. It's like I'm carrying this huge load from point A to point B, and I'm stuck somewhere next to point Z.

My nerves are shot and I just feel twitchy. Not the good sugar-twitch or happy-twitch, but ohmygodwhat'swrongwithme-twitch.

Maybe it comes with my cold, because I've only been feeling like this since I've gotten my cold, but then, that doesn't make much sense.

But like, it seems that I've got this cold and I feel clausterphobic, like my lungs are two sizes too small - and it feels like it's translating over into other aspects of my life. Like, everything is two sizes too small and I can't find somewhere I can just fit. Not like socially, because I know where I fit there mostly, but like my life as a whole.

Where do I fit? What am I supposed to be doing with myself? Why do I feel the need to question myself?

I guess this is the cliche'd topic everyone goes through, but if it is, why does it have to hurt so much?

*yawns* ...

im sleepy. and i have to work tomorrow... and the day after that... and so on. and then tuesday.. my car shall be fixed... once again. ugh!!!

im supercalifragilisticexpialidocious frickin tired of fixing it. almost every cent of my paychecks which from the end of march to now has been over $4000 i could have bought another fucking car. argh..

now i think i will finish up my bills, check on my lizard, and either fall into bed or watch Beauty and the Beast or somethin..

(:

there's like nothing to do on phusebox.

ever since i've found myspace, this place blows.

just like my summer.

nothing to do, friends always busy.

o well at least i'm breathing and have God.

-Tanner

Is dead.

goodbye.

Daniel started teething a while back, which caused him to have a runny nose.  This runny nose caused an ear infection.  To combat the ear infection, he was given a very pricey antibiotic.  This very pricey antibiotic caused diarrhea.  This diarrhea caused extremely bad diaper rash.  This diaper rash causes Daniel to cry each time we change his diaper.  (We're not talking a bit of fussing here; we're talking all out screaming and sobbing, with tears and everything.)  We are now obligated to smear his rear end with a very pricey diaper rash cream, which thankfully contains lidocaine.  Unfotunately, we're only allowed to use it a couple times a day.

Well, at least the antibiotic will be finished in another 4 days.  When the antibiotic stops, the diarrhea will stop, which will hopefully eliminate the diaper rash.  Hopefully then, Daniel will stop crying when we change his diaper.

Please pray for Daniel's health and my sanity.

Hey guys, pretty bored.. pretty bored.  I made a website here for a favorite band of mine.  Feel free to check it out if you have a second, tell me what you think.  Peace out!

My New Website for Angels and Airwaves

If it says it's unavailable just try again later.  I'd really appreciate it.

I dyed my hair. It's a bleach blonde color. I hate it.

hey everyone just thought i would let you guys know that everything is cool with me.yeah....looking forward to going to beckys tonight for big birthday celebrations.lol. well i love you all!

to all that left me remarks.....thanks it helped!

Leah

Not really, i got enough pinching yesterday at nashville shores. It was fun. Only regret... I got sunburnt on my back and the back of my shoulders. Next time i wear a t-shirt....lol. But besides that i got to spend some very valuable time with justin. It was great. There were a few cherishable moments. And i found out i have a TON of things in common with him. I wish there were more Youth Functions like that one! I am also his official glasses holder in the pool...lol. Inside joke... you woulnd't get it unless you were there! I also spent time with Karus, Sarah, Kate, Terry, Chris, Tyler, Josh, and Richard. K to catch you up since its been a long time... here are a few pics...

this is my phone^ it was my birthday present... it is a Sony Ericsson W600i...

its so pretty...

I have also gotten another hair cut and now i have pictures of 3 lengths...

Short^

Medium^

and Long^

i'm not sure which one looks better short...or long... i just plain don't like the medium...also notice that i have lost weight since the Long hair picture YEAYA...

well that is all for now...

It's nothing significant, a few layers at the ends is all.

 Scince every one is sooo interested in posting lyrics, I think I'll post a few meself (and it's meself not myself. It was fully intentional.)

Gnarls Barkley
Crazy


I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that phase.
Even your emotions had to let go
In so much space

And when you're out there
Without care,
Yeah, I was out of touch
But it wasn't because I didn't know enough
I just knew too much

Does that make me crazy
Does that make me crazy
Does that make me crazy
Probably

And I hope that you are having the time of your life
But think twice, that's my only advice
Come on now, who do you, who do you, who do you, who do you think you are,
Ha ha ha bless your soul
You really think your'e in control

Well, I think you're crazy
I think you're crazy
I think you're crazy
Just like me

My heroes had the heart to lose their lives out on a limb
And all I remember is thinking, I want to be like them
Ever since I was little, ever since I was little it looked like fun
And it's no coincidence I've come
And I can die when I'm done

Maybe I'm crazy
Maybe you're crazy
Maybe we're crazy
Probably

i went to nashville shores with my youth group

i had a blast until after when we went home i found 3 hudge blisters on my feet and i can hardly walk know

but other than that i had an amazing time

So seems like summer goes faster now that we're older.  I guess its cause we actually have things to do now instead of just sitting around or playing outside all day. 

Christian and I have been hanging out again.  Its weird, just like  a bad habit we find each other again and again.  And im glad.  I've written this story a 1000 times and over already, so i wont go into it.

so i'm gone to live up the REST of my summer..

Today we spent the day in Budapest, Hungary.  Today we saw two castles, a church in a cave, a local market where we ate some Hungarian food, the baths, and went to a cathedral.  It was a full today.  Tomorrow, we will be driving to Vienna, Austria where we hope to catch a train to Bratislava, Slovakia.  I hope all goes well!

Well, I got my Lottery scholarship and found my clarinet.  Unfortunately, even though the church was air-conditioned, the stage was still 100+ degrees, so we sweated our butts off.  It was fun nonetheless.

Oh, more good news - I finally got my Absent Element cd in the mail today.  AE is Chris Daughtry's band from NC.  I'm liking it so far.  Anyway, I've got work to do.  Hasta luego!

its my last day at the beach..... what am I doing sitting at the computer!?

So we were talking about this the other day.

Suppose the sun goes out and by some miracle, we're able to survive the cold that would surely follow...

The vegans would be the first to go, as they would all the vegetables and die.

The vegetarians would be next, because even though all the vegetables would be gone, they could still eat eggs and cheese and all the stuff the vegans wouldn't [that isn't meat].

Next would be the meat eaters, who would finish off everything the vegetarians refused to eat.

But the best type of person to be in that situation would be a cannibal. They would have food much longer than anyone else.

Just a thought.

shave it?

-or-

keep it?

It is official both of Oakland's soccer teams will be getting a new coach this year. There will be a second try-out for girls not present at the first one. If you want to play I will let you know the date when I find out. If you are interested in playing for Oakland's Girl's Team, Blackman has invited us to their camp Mon. July 24th through Fri. July 28th from 9:00-Noon. It is about $100 and you just have to show up on Mon. @ Blackman. I'm sorry this is such short notice, but we just found out about it yesterday. Also, my select soccer coach, Coach Sparks, is holding practices @ Oakland for girls interested in OHS's soccer team untill we get a new coach. The next practice will be Saturday July 22nd from 9:00-noon @ OHS's practice field. If you have any questions just e-mail me.

Thanx!
~D'Rae~

e-mail: hairspray9@bellsouth.net

ok. tomorrow night, a bunch of girls from church are ganna spend the night.

lindsey. skyler. lisa. angela. maybe joy && tasha if they want.

but there my pastors daughter lindsay.

ok, so basically thats like ALMOST all the girls in our youth group spending the night at my house.

so i feel bad not inviting lindsey crank.

but if we invite her that means we cant do like anything at all....

that means we cant talk about like relationships and stuff. or guys. or like just stuff u talk about at girl sleepovers cause she isnt aloud to like talk about that kinda stuff or something.

and that means the only movies we can watch are PG or G movies.

and we always like do each others hair && make up and stuff just cause, but like her hair, not to be mean but, is like different. its hard to to anything to,and she isnt aloud to wear make up so she is just kinda there anyways.

like all of us girls like get along GReAT. we are all like REALLY good friends. cause we all have the same morals, but have different personalities so we get along great. but how she is is just different from us. so its like we have nothing to talk about with her so its just weird sometimes.

so i dont know if i should call her and ask her if she wants to spend the night or not. so help please?

thanks<3

well, this will probably bore most of u, because it is written only for one person, but thats ok.  u can read it if u want.  a couple of nights ago, one of my greatest friends in the world and i were talking about death, and stuff like that.  it was about 12 at night, over the internet, haha, and it really opened my eyes to some things.  i told her about a song that was going along with what we were talking about, but she couldnt hear it.  but its ok, i found it.  so kristen here u go.  this is the song i was talking about. 

OK

by Mute Math

Down on my knees, down on my face
You just say, it's ok
So many days I've thrown away
But you just say, it's ok
I don't think I could ever repay
Your perfect grace, but it's ok

It's ok. It's ok
It's ok, It's ok
You've become my embrace
Just tell me that it's ok
Your precious words intoxicate
A heart that aches, it's ok
And You don't recall my past mistakes
You just say it's ok
And this human mind can't calculate
Your perfect grace, but it's ok

Even though you've seen
A thousand times I've let you down
You're always there if I should call Your name
You're unashamed, oh unashamed.

  so there u go, i thought it went right along with what we were talking about.  everybody, im going off to florida, so dont have to much fun without me.  i know how murfreesboro is.  there is always something fun and awesome to do.  haha jk, murfreesboro is....... well its just murfreesboro.  so keep it really real.  ttyl.  ill be praying for all yall.   stay strong.  peace

I Leave for Florida tomorrow morning with Ben's familyreally early so I am pretty much gone...... Hope everyone has a great week and I will holla at you guys when I get back....

                Have a blessed WEEK!

                         IN CHRIST john

lovelovelove.

here it goes down.

down into my belly.

mm mm mm.

LOVE/ Britt

well its been a sweet time here on phusebox, but all good things must end.

this one ended with an overflowed toilet and erin leaving the computer up to phusebox.

mom came upstairs to help and was like what is this phusebox?

and now i must not post.

i love you sweet phusebox and will miss you greatly.

-emily

I have a premium league at easports.com that came with NFL Head Coach.

We really need more teams to sign up.  It only costs $10 to join the league and that goes towards prize money.  Let me know if you are interested!

Live Draft Party! hopefully. lol.

Hit me up!


::b

As my family knows, there are certain things that can set me off very easily - one of them is "bill paying" at a restaurant.  When I ask for the bill, that means I am done and ready to go.  If there are "delays" in the close-out / payment process my blood pressure starts rising.

On Thursday we had a meeting of the management committee of the hash ... at one of our favorite restaurants in Angola.  Usually, there aren't too many issues.  Last night we asked for the bill.  When it arrived (10 minutes later), there were two bills ... which is not uncommon as folks arrived at different times.  As I was trying to read the bills (in the darkness; outdoor restaurant with no lighting) the waitress grabs them out of my hand and proceeds to explain in rapid portuguese why there are two bills ... and she goes on and on and on ... I'm not stupid, I already knew why there were two bills.

We put our money in the cup ... and after 5 minutes it was finally collected.  Then we waited for the change (paid $150 for a $130 meal - change due $20) ... and waited ... and waited ... and waited.  We asked about the change ... no answer.  We asked again about the change ... no answer.  Decy went up and asked about the change ... no answer.  Decy and I demanded the change. Finally, they gave us back $10.

I can only presume that they were hoping we would leave ...and they would keep all $20 as a tip ... which is the equivalent to $100 or more in the US based on cost of living.

Total time - 40 minutes.  I was fuming.  But, I controlled my anger and frustration ... and didn't take it home with me.

>>> Decy, thanks for helping me learn step-by-step to handle my anger.

ciao ciao

  well... 

  band. 

  i think what needs to be said has already been said by the other band kids. 

  read their sites. 

  cause i'm lazy. 

  but i will say one thing... 

  the drumline. 

  HOT. 

well im off now, well actually saturday morning, but its ganna be a great trip. im ganna miss all my friends, especially my best great girlfriend. so yea, ill just cya in florida, bye 333

Let her cry...if the tears fall down like rain
Let her sing...if it eases all her pain
Let her go...let her walk right out on me
And if the sun comes up tomorrow
Let her be...let her be.

 I pick up my senior pictures early Saturday. Mini-camp starts in about two weeks. I have great friends that I will be able to get to see again. I just can't help but feel like there is something missing from my life.

You know what makes me squeal and chant "ohmygodohmygodohmygod" at my computer?

THIS.

It's CGI.  That's dumb.  It should be live action like the ones from the 80's and 90's.

For a trailer, see HERE.

ok i'm excited. i'm off work for two days in a row. i get to go to apsu tomorrow to make my schedule and all that mess. we are picking up clayton and he's staying the weekend. AND i am finally having my new motor put in my car. and since i'm getting my new motor that means i'm also going to have an AIR CONDITIONER! i'm so excited.

This week has been a week of "one mores" for Decy and the girls .... given that on Saturday, 29-July they leave for Indonesia ... they have "one more" Monday morning before they leave.  They have "one more" Tuesday ... etc ... get my point?

Moving is difficult by any standards.  Moving overseas is more difficult by a factor of 10.  Moving from a 3rd world country to an "emerging" country seems to be even more difficult.  Nevertheless, we are making progress ... and all things are coming together now, albeit not at the same pace.

Today, Friday, the shipper is supposed to come collect our 13 air freight boxes.  He intends to crate them up for security reasons, then begin working the "customs clearance" process for exiting Angola. He says that alone will take about 2 weeks.  Once the stuff arrives in Indonesia, it will be 4-6 weeks clearance time ... beginning when I arrive ... thus, even air boxes won't be delivered until October.

Last night I learned that the shipper also wants to come pack up the LDN crates (which is the remaining 90% of our stuff) right away and not wait until end August when I leave.  The only way that can happen is if they start on Monday next week, as it has to happen before Decy leaves ... or it must happen on 21-August after my company Vice President reviews.  Being as today is Friday ... I guess I will learn today if they are going to show up on Monday.

Ironically, I had been telling Decy that "everything had to be done" by today so that we could leave next week open for resting and contingency for the unexpected.  I have said this since May .... now, the unexpected seems to be happening.  So much for the resting.

Ahem / sigh, I am glad today is Friday.  There is much to do this weekend, and very little room for rest ... but at least I won't go to the office.

ciao ciao

wow i was totally impressed with rehersal tonight!!!

the opener and candle both sounded really good. as for drum line... they were hot.

this year is gonna own!

how is everyone's summers been going??? mines been pretty good. i just got back from Disney World! we had lots of fun, especially on the Soarin' ride..

i watched a very good movie tonight...the original Dirty Dancing..i love that movie..

"I had the time of my life and i owe it all to you.."

Marissa is a problem to the clarinet section, and the problem will be resolved.

We might have 17 clarinets this year.

Freshmen clarinet players think my playing so well is scary.

I will not give up. I will reach clarinet supremeness!

Danny

So, I went to the pool hall for the 1st time tonight.  It was fun.  I went w/ Ben, Cory, a guy named Jonathan, my brother, and Mandie.  I'm not the best pool player in the world, but I'm better than some, lol.