So Cam'Ron is beefing with Jay-Z!!!!!!!! I can't say i'm surprized though. I guess we haven't learned anything from Big and Pac.

But anyways... I'm a rapper..well sort of lol. I write flows here and there. i"ll let y'all see them later. let me know what u think.

Have you ever had one of those days where everything seems to be wrong?  where no matter how hard you try, it seems like everything has been shot in 500 different directions??  Well have you?  Cause that has been my day today.......it has been absolutly horrible.......but hey its not like I can really change it now by writing it on here.......well peace out I am gone

Well I guess that I had a pretty cool birthday so far. I am going out tomorrow night with alot of people for dinner and then nathan, melissa and I are going to the Dave Barnes Cd Release show in the Old City. I am so excited.

I am really going to learn how to play the guitar. I started tonight for the first time for real. I am learning how to play "Save Tonight" by Eagle-Eye Cherry. Very Good song....side note: my fingers hurt.

I will have a new website up soon on UT's server. I just got iLife 06 and have been playing with iWeb alot. The new iPhoto is amazing as well. My website should be up tomorrow. Jason's Website it will be up soon.

I bought iLife 06 and a new video camera for myself for my birthday...haha lol. I know what you are thinking, but I got some money for my birthday. But I really bought my own birthday present. Oh well.

I love all of you guys and God loves you too! Even more than I ever could.

Wow...I just experienced a huge let down... So drama was supposed to do the play "You Can't Take it With You." and I had the role of Tony. The quote, "Romantic Lead". I worked really hard to get the part. I was so excited for the play. I couldn't wait. And then. I find out today...that we can't do the play anymore. There is a huge conflict in the contract. We casted about three girls in major guy roles and we just switched the gender of the characters around in the play. We also changed two black characters to two white actors. And we change the time setting of the play. Well, the company that owns the rights to the play says we can't do that. So after blocking all of act one. Its over. There goes my role that I was so excited for. So now we are scrambling to find another play to do. We only have six weeks. psshh, yeah. It blows...

 *sighs*

 Not to act like my life always sucks ass, but these past few weeks are killing me. I feel so ripped up. heh. Ripped up.

 But yeah, thats cool. Been going to some basketball games, hanging out with new people, I'm still trying to maintain my philosophy that happiness is more important that stressing yourself out over school. *shrug*

Daniel V. will win project runway.

...love kills slowly....
~tRISH

Doctor Inkpot's Musical Health Series
"We are Hear to Help You"

Chapter 6 - MAHLERIA
(Blastmodium Postmodernemotionalis)

Based on the research of Dr.William Beh
Phd.(FWMU), Phd.(SFA), MA(TFI), BA(FSSO)

Based on the research of Dr.William Beh
Phd.(FWMU), Phd.(SFA), MA(TFI), BA(FSSO)

Sponsored by:

6.1 Inktroduction




Mahleria is one of the most serious health problems facing humanity. At least 10 million of the world's music audience is known to be infected. Hundreds of thousands more "Closet Mahlerians" are believed to be infected, the rate growing every year.

The disease is mainly confined to the affluent areas of Europe, America and East Asia. The problems are aggravated by inadequate listening diets. The situation has complexified over the years with the increase in resistance to alternative musics used to combat the disease-carrying parasite.

Mahleria is caused mainly by the vector Compact Discs of the genus Blastmodium Postmodernemotionalis. Three species of Blastmodium can produce the disease in its various forms - Blastmodium Egogigantis, Blastmodium Miserablis and Blastmodium Mahleria. B. Egogigantis is the most dangerous: untreated it can lead to Fatal Cerebral Mahleria, in which the victim becomes zombie-like, hanging around concert halls with bagloads of CDs, staring balefully at potential converts and especially conductors deemed to have made mistakes.

Compact Discs are transmitted by the Blastmodium subspecies of the Concertgoer family. For some reason, mainly males carry the parasite. Like all other concertgoers, they breed primarily in concert halls, CD shops and music newsgroups. Sensitivity to pesticides, including high CD prices, is variable.

Parasites in a victim progressively break down other cells responsible for supporting other composers. This induces bouts of CDlust in the infected individual, as well as that feverish look in their eyes. In Cerebral Mahleria, the infected cells obstruct the blood vessels in the brain. This dangerous syptom can only be alleviated by listening to Mahler symphonies, which liberate the blood flow.

Mahleria can sometimes be cured by anti-mahlerial drugs in the form of Baroque music, Haydn's early symphonies, Sibelius' inner logic and Bach's The Art of Fugue. The symptoms, pained descriptions of the composer's life, extensive vocabularies for the synonyms of misery, and hovering near letter "M" at record stores quickly disappear once the parasite is killed.

In certain regions, however, the parasites have developed resistance to normal anti-Mahlerial drugs. Patients in these areas require treatment with more powerful drugs, such as Madonna, Stevie Wonder and Elvis Presley. Cases of severe disease including cerebral Mahleria require cold turkey treatment with the most hideous drug ever invented by humanity - Richard Clayderman.

The public is advised to be very quick when shopping for CDs in infected areas, especially those of you looking for "Lully" and "Martinu" CDs. If threatened, it may be helpful to whip out a hammer and say in a calm but firm voice: "Don't come near me or I'll strike the last hammer blow."

A detailed knowledge of the ecology of the local vector is essential for controlling the disease. To begin with, it is useful to understand members of the subspecies.

6.2 Engendered Species
The average Mahlerian comes in a variety of species, much like any other type of concert-goer. This is a list of the more colourful ones:

The Know-It-Alls (Resistansis Futilium)
If the mandolin in the fourth movement of the Seventh Symphony misses a note in the sixteenth bar, these people will notice, let you know they noticed and will attempt to disgrace you for not having noticed. Do not engage them in discussion: it's what they want, they won't even listen to you and you cannot win. Pretend (or not) you have a stomachache and run. They'll let you go as soon as their next victim appears.

The Seen-It-Alls (Prehistoricum Dinosaurus)
These people will try to convince you that you, the unfortunate newbie to Mahler, cannot possibly understand the meaning of real, great Mahlerian performance, since you have never heard a 'live' performance of the Eighth, let alone, for example, Barbirolli do the Ninth with the Berlin Philharmonic in 1964. Don't let them get to you. They will also say the same thing to anyone else, even the conductor, given the opportunity. Unlike the Know-It-Alls, these people are not deliberately trying to be arrogant; they are just mourning their lost years. Smile indulgently and look upon them with as much pity as you can.

The Wannabes (Obscenis Ignoramus)
Conducting one's speakers in the home can be quite fun, but certain enjoyable things done by oneself in private are best left private. When these people wave their arms around in the concert hall, they are merely exhibiting an ungarnished act of self-aggrandizement and the acme of pretentiousness, since if they were any good they would be already up there on the podium and not seated among the hoi polloi. These people have to be shamed publicly at the intermission. You can, for example, suggest loudly mistakes in their conducting ("...sehr langsam merely means very slow, not dead!") or even tell them to "go home and practice some more first".

The "We Came For Mahler" Crowd (Artus Fartus)
Now, these are the people for whom Mahler is more of a religion than an art form, and would rather sprain a muscle or two than admit otherwise. Any reference to his works as "classical music" will elicit violence, tooth and claw, from them. The good thing is that since these people use their nostrils to look at other people who are beneath conversation, they will not bother you much at the intermission. They can sometimes be identified by the battered, oversized Dover scores they carry under their arms.

The "Romantics" (Hypochrondus Maximus)
These people should be avoided at all costs, if only because they are chronically always in a romantic depression (also known as "artistic" depression), despite not really having anything to be depressed about. Readily identified by their black Giordano turtlenecks and constant dramatic wiping of their foreheads with the back of their hands, they are well read, consider themselves poets ("yes, quite, but aren't we all?") and will readily imagine themselves to be suffering (and sometimes dying) from a fatal heart condition, curiously not unlike the one which killed Mahler.

The Evangelists (Zealotum Cultus Mahlerea)
These are people for whom Mahler is absolutely a religion: they are convinced that there is only one composer worth listening to and Mahler is his name. They will feel violated if you even attempt to mention another name in their presence, and have collections of every single Mahler, and only Mahler, recording ever released, plus even more bootleg recordings made on Walkmans and exchanged between themselves. Since the invention of DVD, they will only watch Death in Venice in Soundtrack Only mode. Worse, they will not stop trying to convince you that their religion is the right one, the only one, citing examples ranging from how big Mahler gets ("...and you'll need a cast of over a thousand people !") to how popular Mahler is. There is also a factory beer ad which will send them into paroxysms of ecstasy, especially the portion when the conductor jumps in the air. To them, if there is a composer who could part the Red C, Mahler is him.

Pretend that you have been won over to their faith and have accepted Mahler as the one and only prophet, then try to escape at the first opportunity.

The F.A.M. Syndrome (Kaplaneria Psychosis)
These people suffer from extreme psychosis, also known as the "Fanatic About Mahler" Syndrome. (Also informally called "Flying Around the Maypole", "Foaming At the Mouth", etc.) They will have wet dreams about quitting their jobs, acquiring Mahler's original manuscripts and taking conducting lessons for a whole year, just for the pleasure of conducting a Mahler symphony with orchestras around the world. The extraordinarily wealthy ones, as in "I have so much money I don't even know what to do with what's left with after I've finished spending what I want to spend", have been known to actually make it happen. But such people are, fortunately, very rare indeed.

The Sing-Alongs (Podex Perfectus)
There is no legal jurisprudence in the world, or at least in those parts of the world with decent symphony orchestras, who would convict you for the culpable homicide of one of these, provided that you have given them at least one warning - a fierce stare is acceptable while the performance is in progress - before killing them. Some places will even give you a public service medal for your contribution to the arts.

The Know-It-Alls (Resistansis Futilium)
If the mandolin in the fourth movement of the Seventh Symphony misses a note in the sixteenth bar, these people will notice, let you know they noticed and will attempt to disgrace you for not having noticed. Do not engage them in discussion: it's what they want, they won't even listen to you and you cannot win. Pretend (or not) you have a stomachache and run. They'll let you go as soon as their next victim appears.

The Seen-It-Alls (Prehistoricum Dinosaurus)
These people will try to convince you that you, the unfortunate newbie to Mahler, cannot possibly understand the meaning of real, great Mahlerian performance, since you have never heard a 'live' performance of the Eighth, let alone, for example, Barbirolli do the Ninth with the Berlin Philharmonic in 1964. Don't let them get to you. They will also say the same thing to anyone else, even the conductor, given the opportunity. Unlike the Know-It-Alls, these people are not deliberately trying to be arrogant; they are just mourning their lost years. Smile indulgently and look upon them with as much pity as you can.

The Wannabes (Obscenis Ignoramus)
Conducting one's speakers in the home can be quite fun, but certain enjoyable things done by oneself in private are best left private. When these people wave their arms around in the concert hall, they are merely exhibiting an ungarnished act of self-aggrandizement and the acme of pretentiousness, since if they were any good they would be already up there on the podium and not seated among the hoi polloi. These people have to be shamed publicly at the intermission. You can, for example, suggest loudly mistakes in their conducting ("...sehr langsam merely means very slow, not dead!") or even tell them to "go home and practice some more first".

The "We Came For Mahler" Crowd (Artus Fartus)
Now, these are the people for whom Mahler is more of a religion than an art form, and would rather sprain a muscle or two than admit otherwise. Any reference to his works as "classical music" will elicit violence, tooth and claw, from them. The good thing is that since these people use their nostrils to look at other people who are beneath conversation, they will not bother you much at the intermission. They can sometimes be identified by the battered, oversized Dover scores they carry under their arms.

The "Romantics" (Hypochrondus Maximus)
These people should be avoided at all costs, if only because they are chronically always in a romantic depression (also known as "artistic" depression), despite not really having anything to be depressed about. Readily identified by their black Giordano turtlenecks and constant dramatic wiping of their foreheads with the back of their hands, they are well read, consider themselves poets ("yes, quite, but aren't we all?") and will readily imagine themselves to be suffering (and sometimes dying) from a fatal heart condition, curiously not unlike the one which killed Mahler.

The Evangelists (Zealotum Cultus Mahlerea)
These are people for whom Mahler is absolutely a religion: they are convinced that there is only one composer worth listening to and Mahler is his name. They will feel violated if you even attempt to mention another name in their presence, and have collections of every single Mahler, and only Mahler, recording ever released, plus even more bootleg recordings made on Walkmans and exchanged between themselves. Since the invention of DVD, they will only watch Death in Venice in Soundtrack Only mode. Worse, they will not stop trying to convince you that their religion is the right one, the only one, citing examples ranging from how big Mahler gets ("...and you'll need a cast of over a thousand people !") to how popular Mahler is. There is also a factory beer ad which will send them into paroxysms of ecstasy, especially the portion when the conductor jumps in the air. To them, if there is a composer who could part the Red C, Mahler is him.

Pretend that you have been won over to their faith and have accepted Mahler as the one and only prophet, then try to escape at the first opportunity.

The F.A.M. Syndrome (Kaplaneria Psychosis)
These people suffer from extreme psychosis, also known as the "Fanatic About Mahler" Syndrome. (Also informally called "Flying Around the Maypole", "Foaming At the Mouth", etc.) They will have wet dreams about quitting their jobs, acquiring Mahler's original manuscripts and taking conducting lessons for a whole year, just for the pleasure of conducting a Mahler symphony with orchestras around the world. The extraordinarily wealthy ones, as in "I have so much money I don't even know what to do with what's left with after I've finished spending what I want to spend", have been known to actually make it happen. But such people are, fortunately, very rare indeed.

The Sing-Alongs (Podex Perfectus)
There is no legal jurisprudence in the world, or at least in those parts of the world with decent symphony orchestras, who would convict you for the culpable homicide of one of these, provided that you have given them at least one warning - a fierce stare is acceptable while the performance is in progress - before killing them. Some places will even give you a public service medal for your contribution to the arts.

SO.... WHICH ONE ARE YOU?

DON'T WAIT - CALL FOR HELP NOW:
1800-BE-HAPPY

umm..i need a life...i work too much!..

31.5 hrs as a high school student = too much!

but i like it ::big smile:: ahh.......

prom = april 28th, im going with a co-worker

well i think the title explains it....it was indeed a bad day... to say the least.

this is the wonderful body art...glorious isn't it?

sorry y'all...i got bored...and i took pictures of myself.

this phusebox is glorious. i like it a lot.

i also like surfing. because it's my love.

hey go read a book...preferably Uglies or Pretties by Scott Westerfeld. probably the best books ever. wow. i want to molest them they are so good.

i can do the pancake...and it's so tasty you need syrup.

LOVE/ Britt

  Hey!!!! I gots a phusebox! Now what?

West Side Story call backs were today. I didn't make them but I wonder how they went. Everybody is so good! I made dance "call backs" though. But thats as far as I got. whoa is me!

    Ok so i am definetly avoiding writting my paper. I feel like I am back in college avoiding work until the last minute. So my plan is to work on it tonight and tomorrow. But right now I just don't feel like starting it!!! I need to just start it once I start I can get it over with! So I think I will start some laundry clean up my room and then start. Can I also say that my very loud neighbors have been fighting all evening it's like impossible to not hear them.

hey i got a phusebox yall tell me how to work this thing please lol tata

tyler

Soo.. Coming up..
Last Homecoming.
Last Warrior Hysteria ::sad::
Last pep rally.
Last Prom *Midnight in Paris*

running to another world
falling in love
fake laughter
alluring eyes
words without weight
figurative speech
deceit
coldness
poetry
lighting candles
beautiful pain
beauty in general

So, today went pretty well... I went to the Prom fashion show and had a lot of fun. i even did really good acting/singing A Boy Like That in 5th period for Choir.

i'm such a big mouth.

there's alot i wanna say.                    but i shouldn't say it. so i won't...

what is it? 

i just think i might cry...

what's wrong with me?

"There are lots of stars
As if to fill the gap between thick clouds
They are shining like a prayer
Almost like a shout
And my chest is constricted
I hope the morning will come for me soon
Before I can't hide up my weakness"
-Ayu (HAPPY ENDING)

well... its kinda crazy to see, just how people are.  people you know, people you dont know, there are so many people hurting.  u can see it in a persons eyes at school, or just when you walking around.  it sucks seeing so much pain in this world.  its so dark, but yet there is still a light.  it seems like some people are following the wrong light.  we see something, and maybe we try to fill something in our hearts.  but its not ganna make a differance unless it is true and nourishing.  our eyes cannot adjust to the darkness.  we need to train ourself to see the one and only true light.  the only way that will be done is THROUGH THE SPIRIT BY FAITH.  stay ontop of everything.  dont get used to how the world is.  keep letting things hurt you.  we cant afford to let our eyes adjust.  stay ontop of your game.  keep your eyes on the lookout for hurt and pain.  then do your thing.  through christ!

Well this morning, my bus either broke down or she just didn't feel like picking us up.  We rode another bus this morning which didn't get to my house until like 7:20...  I think my teacher is starting to think I'm lying about my bus being late.

The school day was ok.  Nothing out of the ordinary.  Then of course at "credit recovery" the computer has to piss me off.  I typed up a problem in my calculator, then clicked the answer on the computer and it told me I was wrong...  I got really pissed so I had to leave at 4:00 instead of 5:00 or I would have slammed the keyboard through the moniter...

ok got some new photos up..yep m tried so yeah later

Captain's log: Stardate- 4.57.01.26.06

So...yeah. I haven't posted in a month of Sundays because of that blasted "Continuity of Monotony."

'seeways...

I've discovered that:

•  I hate sodium nitrate.


• Techno-German Sailor Moon is still cool


• Phoenix is still my favorite X-Man


• Wool socks keep your feet drier that white socks


• having a cell phone is joy


• I like pepper-jack cheese better than cheddar chese.


• The battle music theme to Wonderland in Kingdom Hearts makes me dance like an idiot. And when I say dance like an idiot, I mean even more idiotic than 'The Fall Retreat.'


• Artichokes and chicken taste really good on pizza and  pasta.

and that's about it...

Ok, I'm typically on myspace.com, but a friend of mine told me to check this site out. Imagine how fast my jaw hit the ground when I found out that this site was made by Nathan. It's hard to believe that the Moore family are all grown up, lol. It's been too long. I used to go to church with their family. It's great to be able to reunite the friendship I had with the Moore family, and hopefully more of my old friends will pop up too.

Just a little background, YWAM Metro New York has been trying to get a location inside the city for 19 years!  And God has consistently closed the door until now.  Our new location is on E. 11th St. and I LOVE our neighborhood.  Here's some pics.  Keep in mind we are in the middle of renovating.
   The new office   The kitchen
   The living room   The bedroom  The view from the kitchen window.  You can see the Empire State Building.  It's really pretty at night...

     A park outside our back windows.  I love this park.  It is always filled with kids during the day.  We can sit on our fire escape and watch them or just enjoy the city.  It's great.
I'll try to put up some pictures after we finish renovating.

So right now I feel both physically and emotionally sick.  Things are pretty much going downhill fast.  I don't know how to stop.  I need a nice long weekend to myself.  I need to prepare for next week.  I need to go crazy for once.  I'm being dragged into things that I don't want to be a part of and maybe that makes me a terrible person but I don't care anymore.  I'm tired of high school.  I'm tired of classes.  I'm tired of people.  I want summer to be here.  I want a nice vacation, possibly by myself.  I don't know what I want anymore... 

This afternoon Ben came up to me in the band room and I just turned around and hugged him and we stood like that until Christi came in and said "Let's go!"  I love those moments. I always feel so peaceful and comforted.  His birthday is in a week and I'm VERY excited about it. Game tomorrow night might be a good stress reliever, that or what I do after the game...

I can rock the lip rings?
i have no life.

nothings been going on.
Hairspray last weekend was awesome.
school sucks,
i've been sick the past week,
but i got a few things done,
but for everything done 2 things aren't?
oiy.

I got signed up for early day.
hell yes.

that's about it.

Been doing a lot of work lately. Thought I would post some photos of one of the houses that we did.

Wherever you are i'll be there too. thats what i want to say to someone. but i can't. too many people r telling me too many things at once. assignments are piling up and i am going into a frenzy. i think i am practically killing one guy and another has just entered the pic after apologizing like crazy. my nightmares are back and i want to scream. i stressed so much that i blacked out from exhaustion at 9:13.

it was really weird. there was a house with a gorgous family in it. they were all killed savagely. blood everywhere. a zombiefied vamp appeared in front of me and killed the girl next to me. i tried to get away but was unsuccessful. he grabbed my arm and instead of biting my wrist he bit my hand. it hurt so bad in my dream, in my dream i blacked out. i wanted to cry. when i awoke in my dream i was in the house where the family was murdered. i was in a room with bunkbeds and there were people in them. suddenly they were pulled into the beds and their nightmares came out of it. 

i only have totally bad dreams if something bad is going on in real life or if i am under alot of stress. i am trying to figure out everything. hopefully i won't go crazy in the process.

have you ever just felt like a horrible human being?

other than that, prom fashion show was fun. i'm sure someone will put pictures up soon, and then i will steal them.

i don't feel well. much. at all.

i think that's it for now.

I'm taking Kate Hooper to prom!

Work sucked last night.  The moniters that display the orders are out to kill me.  I ran into the one over the grills yesterday and cut my head open.  I bled, I BLED!!!  It hurt alot.  I wanted to go home but there was only three people working last night so that was impossible.  I might go see Underworld: Evolutions tonight but I might not too.  I might just go home and read.  I got my contacts today.  Which means I'll at least look a little better.  I'm really tired today.  In a bit I'm just gonna go home and lay down, after I get some food.  Maybe I'll go to Hastings or something.  I'm not entirely sure about anything today.  Oh word of advice, never eat McDonald's bacon cheeseburgers.  They are right disgusting.

not cool, yo

My Sister is in Miss MTSU this Saturday! I am super excited for her! I just wanted to wish her good luck.  I'll have pictures of her dress up later. She is SO pretty!!!

So, I've been in a relationship with an incredible boy for almost two weeks now. The story of how we came to know each other is definitely a God written love story.. Before we met, neither of us were wanting to date anyone.. or at least we weren't expecting it. In fact, I was in a committment to not date.. but anyway.. My friend Sam introduced me to him and we began a friendship that after about a month bloomed into a mutual attraction for each other and six weeks later.. we decided we'd enter an official relationship...

It seems every day that we recall the blessing God has given both of us and praise him. I sincerely hope that he is my number two, the only man I'll ever need on earth..

Life begins now. 
There is no meantime.

I used to find myself saying meaningless phrases such as "...in the meantime" as well as counting down the days, hours, minutes until [fill in the blank].

Seriously.  I started counting down the days til my 16th birthday when the number was 180.

Until this year, I've always known how many days were left in the school year.

In China (the 5 month time), I knew exactly how long I'd been there
and exactly how long til I went home.

Life is not prison.

God didn't place you where you are for no reason, so you could only look forward to something else IN THE MEANTIME.

The last year of my life has been hard.  I've been in a place (literally) that wasn't necessarily my first choice, but it was safe and comfortable and easy. 

I've looked back with longing and looked forward with impatience.

Now, I'm standing still.  I'm finding that place in my life of absolute satisfaction.  I'm looking back with joy and forward with joy and here and now and everything in between with joy.

Life is captivating.  Life is beautiful.  Life begins now.

ladies and gents.How is everybodys 06 goin? well its been a mega 2006 so far me. So yea my friend Brian Lovato(the ymca cop) turned 17 on 1-21-2006 so he had a birthday party and later that night his kick ass cousin came over and some more of our kick ass friends and then we went to snookers in antioch. when we got there it was like the whole asian posse was there. They were like mega deep and they were like cool as heck. then we went to steak and shake and we had a crazy waitress, a hostess that had like an anime girls body, and a cook named cleophus. you do the math! it was hella fun.

Call backs for West Side Story are today... >.< and i am SOOO nervous. but i dressed up for em and everything! ppl have been so nice about it... but i'm so scared... *prays*

"Even if you think yourself as too bold
It's just good
To be frank, I'm reluctant
To be prudent and reserved
Don't watch me quietly, stand up and show me
Be free
Raise your voices
Let me realize
That you are there"
-Ayu (Bold & Delicious)

There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no-one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully around with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is hell.
-- C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

ok so despite all the badness and worry and fear going on in my life right now, some very exciting things have happened! today in the mail i got my packet of information from york university in toronto! i could sooo see myself going there in the future, and i really want to. i just have to figure out what my GPA is, if i could get in at york with my college transcript, or if i just need to pretend like i never went to college (though i would really like to use my first year credits when my grades were good). of course there is the problem of having to pay off the money i owe MTSU before i can even view my transcript (1,780 dollars) and with my current financial situation of only having like 20 dollars i dont see that happening anytime soon.

my other excitingness is my j-group that i am going to lead. i am SO FREAKING EXCITED about it. our first meeting is tonight and i hope that everyone comes! i am very pumped about it and i see it being the highlight of my week. in other news that made my week, i got to talk to leslie tonight, and that always brightens things up. ugh i just wish they would all come home. but talking to leslie tonight just made my day. so those are the good things despite the madness, i thank God for still pouring blessings on me when it seems i have nothing left. have a happy thursday everyone!

love, me

Wow!!!  Last night was truely amazing!!! Church was amazing!!! God is AWESOME!!! my favorite part of the night was sitting at steak n' shake with two friends, one of which i haven't talked to in a long while, and talking about the scars that we have from silly accidents that we endured in the past. Nate you are a great friend, thanks for hanging out with us!


             P.S  Because of human error this doesn't look like we wanted it to!!! But you get the point........ 

Priceless: Catching up with an old friend!

Sweetest thing tonight...Nate Tallman paying for our food/milkshakes tonight at Steak n Shake...

Scariest thing Tonight...racing Nate Tallman down Rutherford...

So, me...I'm a little crazy (hence the title).  Guess what I did today?  I went to class while I'm still on break!!  I went to Amy and Rachel Bonin's psych class with them today.  lol... I know, I'm weird, but I'm having withdrawls from class and school and my friends!  :o)  I can't wait to go back!  I love being here, and I'm going to miss my family, but I also can't wait to go back to my routine (which will alter slightly since I will have a new schedule, but that's beside the point).  :o)  Why am I so weird?  lol  But I really did enjoy it!  lol (1) one because I've already had Vanzant psych in high school, (2) I had college psych last semester, (3) I'm not really in that class because I don't go to MTSU.  therefore I could enjoy people watching and disagreeing with the professor on certain points (not actually vocalizing them, but mostly writing them down). but the funniest thing that actually happened in class was when the professor asked what research in general could be used to find out, one guy in the class raised his hand and said, "to find out the best kind of beers."  but that wasn't all.  He proceeded to answer a couple more questions with beer somewhere in the answer.  lol i thought it was humerous.  I definately became a bit more appreciative of Union and it's environment today.  I really like the small campus atmosphere where I walk from class to class and run in to a hundred people I know.  It's much better in my opinion.  :o)

Well, that's about all I have to say about my day!  Thanks for letting me go with you Amy and Rach! 

So here's the deal. Everything in my life seems to be going beautifully, and I would never let anyone know otherwise, but you know, it's kind of lonely here. I'm missing something very important. I'm actually enjoying my classes, and I have an amazing job as a pharmacy assistant. (Well, I hope I still have it, my till was off last night when they counted). I thought I was happy, but then on my days off, I just sit in my room with nothing to do, no one to hang with. I just stare at the computer all day long. I try to make friends, but people here just seem like they don't need another friend or something, ya know? Tomorrow, though, I'm going to eat lunch with Tri Sigma, so I hope that goes well. It would be a great way to meet people, and a great source of camaraderie. I guess I should pray about this whole deal. I prayed about the job, and amazingly got it. It's a very weird story, and pretty much miraculous how it happened.

I know I'm supposed to be here, and this is how. You see, I have these dreams, sort of like premonitions. No, I am not joking and I am not crazy. More than a couple of times this has happened. Anyways, deja vu also comes into play with this. You see, I have the dream, and it is stored in some hidden memory. Then, when the event happens, this memory is unlocked, and I remember, in great detail, the dream. Well, the first week of classes, my English professor said that we were going to be reading The Great Gatsby. She then went into how we probably read it in high school and didn't like it. Months earlier, I had a dream, and when I had it I didn't understand it, but that is exactly what happened in my dream.

My life is strange. And I do believe that those dreams also have something to do with the Cruce blessing.

fuckin' retarded machine.  now i'm super pissed and i don't want to write anything......../......,mhjb vghd cxbyufgahh9p

I figured what the hell.  I've never really made an entry on this thing.  Classes are going excellently.  Talked to the dean of admissions about the whole 30-hour thing for sophomore status.  She said it didnt really matter.  It's pretty much just guidelines.  lol.  Just like the code.  My University Seminar class is awesome.  All we do is joke around and color/use our right brain.  It's great.  Our teacher is just "some other place" every class.  Well, I'm out.  Peace Guys.

everyone do a favour 4 me, look up this song, bc its gawwjuss

<3

damn mirror...... TODAYS #1 BAMF (yes i stole that from sara) .....ASHLEE!!! LOL.... god im tired!!
~tRISH

With two days like my two most recent, who needs any added drama?!?!

It has been a wild ride for me these past two days. Spent yesterday afternoon in the ER due to some severe chest pain and a case of the "I can't breathes" After nearly 4 hours of testing they sent me home saying something definatley caused it and its worth looking into but they knew it wasn't a heart attack and it wasn't something obvious. So here we go again down the road of 'investigative/diagnostic testing'. Yeeha. I'm set up to have an echo-cardiogram of my heart and a MRI of my brain to investigate my vision impairment. We shall see how that all goes. But as of today besides some general weakness and fatigue (probably from the blood they borrowed from me and forgot to give back) I'm feeling okay. I had a support group there with me which made things much better. And we found just how handy having someone with radios of the police variety can be. Michael was able to meet me at the hospital and know what was going on so that no one was too panicked!

It was not my choice of ways to spend the afternoon but better to know where I stand and face it head on than be caught unaware after its too late.

Today on a lighter note has been over all pretty good. I took a 'mental health/recovery' day from classes (all two of them) and enjoyed my day running around with my prince charming and his sidekick. We enjoyed a lunch at Toot's and then some time spent on his most recent car project! ;) Go figure right? Then after church and a wonderful choir practice I took cuteness back to rescue where his car was sans "eyes." Then. . .

On the way home I witnessed what I'll call a 'road rage' incident and somehow wound up the only eyewitness, made some connections with MPD and sat in the back of a patrol car!!! What an accomplishment, huh?

Anyway that has been my day, I'm now looking forward to completing my current stats section way ahead of schedule, picking up my apartment and getting a good night's sleep before another work day tomorrow (hopefully sans the trip to the ER). Anyway more later ~MEW

wow....things couldnt be more insane!!!! yup!!!  God is teaching me a lot about patience...and normally i am patient about most things....but lately that hasnt been the case!!! soo im learning!

its crazy...how one person can say something and it changes everything for the better!!! something new i have learned to!

so i have a ton of homework soo im gonna go!
have a great day tomorrow!

Love Through Christ!
~Rachel~

So, when your body doesn't like something you ate, does it find the quickest route out of your body???

Ok I don't think I will be eatting Romia Pizza when it comes to True North anymore, I mean it was great, I loved it, but I guess you can say I loved it so much my mouth wanted to have a taste of it again and it didn't taste like Pizza anymore...

aka, I upchucked pizza tonight on the way back from church/hollywood videos, and right when we turned into my subdivision it started, and now I feel somewhat better, but not 100%

I feel like I'm waiting for something to happen...I just don't know what. I'm ready for my world to be shaken upside down, to be swept off my feet, showered aith attention, and placed on a pedestal. I'm ready for my time to shine...

But when is that something going to happen?

Man...Snow would be nice. Like snowball fight snow. I remember when we got that in January...

School's okay, but my homework is drivin me insane.

I think that now that my computer is faster I'll be on here more often. I'll try...

Next entry I'll start adding interest.

Catch ya'll next time...

-+JACOB+-

Addison is trying to stop sucking her thumb. 

 It is her new years resolution.  She is having a hard time transitioning.  Sucking her thumb is how she has put herself to sleep since she was 3 months old.  Now she is being forced to learn how to do it a whole new way.  To a 4 year old this is a big deal.  I am also struggling a bit because I am the one always reminding her and painting the nasty tasting polish on her thumbs.  She is actually grieving her thumb sucking....it is pitiful!  This may sound silly, but wow it is rocking our world right now. Addie's  bedtime used to be a very predictable structured relaxing time for us.  Now it is stressful and heart wrenching.  My hormones from the medicines aren't helping my moods any so I am having to try very hard not to be mega-bitch.  So far I haven't lost it...but I have had to call my mom a few times.  You know it has to be bad when a mommy has to call her mom.  My mom is such a voice of reason.  What she told me was just common sense, but I wasn't thinking rationally while Addison was crying"mommy" over and over.  When I got off of the phone with her I was able to take care of business without making the situation worse.  Anyway sometimes I just need an outside perspective.    

Can someone answer the question on why I am freaked out by prom? Please choose the most correct answer.

A.I don't think I will be asked.
B.I don't know who I would ask
C.I haven't even thought about dresses
D.I don't even think I have a group of people I could go with as a group.
E. All of the above

If you picked E, you are right. You can also assume that I am going to go completly insane before this is over.

Yes, a true statement.

Why?  Well, quite honestly, I'm tired of it.  It really sucks that I'm now beginning to find out that programming isn't my cup of tea.  The main problem with this is that...well, I can't exactly change my major and be able to get out of there in 4 years.  Heck, at this point, I really wouldn't know what to consider changing into.  I'm beginning to think about altogether dropping the one class that's gonna give me the most problem for the time being.  Heck, I almost wonder if I should even bother with college.

...Y'know, all I really want to do is enjoy spending time with everyone, doing what I need to do to get by, raise a child that would ultimately become a better person than I could ever hope to be...  Outside of that...  What is there?

I suppose I want to help people.  I want to help people live better lives.  And, really, would sitting in front of a computer inside an office inside a huge building help people live better lives?  I really don't think so; all I'd end up doing is pissing someone off with my lame and flawed code.

...I don't know.  All I know is that coding is simply becoming a pain in the ass and I'm far from the best at it.  Do I simply give up and go for something different and maybe just minor in computer science simply because I have most of the classes I would need to minor in it?  I'm beginning to think that more and more.

...The main problem is that I really don't know what to do with myself if I do go that route.  I want to free myself from this torture, but I have nowhere to turn as of right now.

...I think it's time to go ahead and drop one of the two computer sciences courses I'm taking.  If I at least drop the one, I should be able to focus in my studies of other classes much better than I would be taking it.  Besides, 18 hours is an asston of stuff.  That's probably a part of why I'm so pissed with this class.  But, hey, if I drop it for the time being, it'll make me feel a lot better about it.  Then I take some other random computer science course next semester to round out a minor in computer science...then major in something that doesn't involve asstons of coding.

...Perhaps it's time to go have a look at what there is to do...

wwhahaahahahahaahahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!!!!!!!!!!!!! OOOOKAAAAAAYYYY!!!!!!!! YEEEEEEEEUUUUHHHHH!!! LIL JON!!!! KRUNK UP ON ME PIMP JUICE!!!!!! I wanna ride a pogo stick to wally world with my pet bowling ball!!!! Maybe we can all waltz to the moon together!!! I bet you can't lick your elbow!!!!! I bet you just tried it u retard! AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Get krunk with the fishes in the tank!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! I think i'll go outside where its cold and listen to myself breathing...and then LAUGH MY BUTT OFF!!!! AHAHAHAHA AMI DRIVER!!!!!

I REALLY WANNA SEE THE MOVIE "WHEN A STRANGER CALLS!!!"

I'M MORE HYPER THAN ELMO ON CRACK!!!!




^^Me and the prittiest girl in the world!!!!!!! SHE ROCKS MY FACE OFF!!!!

Now go hit up on some JESUS!!!!

~GEEERREEETTTT ahahahahaha

Guess who is moving into an apartment in August? ME!!

this is a very hard network to figure out.  i can't even put a photo on this thing.  well the whole reason why i'm doing this is because someone invited me on and when i started to make my profile and everything, i just couldn't put a photo on.  weird.  i am not a computer geek...  well maybe for myspace and that's it.  the truth of the matter is, i can't figure out this not self explanatory network. 

anyways, so this is my very first blog for this thing.  as you can see i love black and red.  well actually i'm a color  black fan.  i know that this might be some random blog but too bad for all y'all...  soon we be livin' it island style.  stay tuned. 

ALOHA

"When I grow up, I want to be a water bed." -Mild Sauce

Go to the website on Hodg-e and Jeff's post.

I have a great dislike for my life right now.  By right now I'm not sure if I mean this moment or this month, but whatever I mean, I don't like it.  I'm just filled to the brim with what seems to be nothing but bitterness and irritation.  I feel like a generally less-than-adequate person.  More accurately, I've been less than myself.   I only feel less than adequate.

I know why I feel that way.  I just don't know why I do the things that make me feel that way.

The internet isn't exactly where I'd want to get into it, so I'll just quit while I'm ahead.

News from the Land that is Oak-y:
After school today, in the business hall.  White kid and black kid were from some reason not having a civilized conversation.  White kid called black kid the n-word.  Black kid pushed white kid to the ground.  Kicked white kid in the face.  White kid couldn't get back up, just laid on the ground shaking.  While I was driving my friend Stephanie home, we saw an ambulance racing past us in the Oakland direction.

Know what sucks?  How this is going to go down with the other kids at school.  I already saw some of it today.

White kids are going to be mad because a black kid hurt a white kid.

Black kids are going to be mad because a white kid called a black kid the n-word.

The real problem is that one of our students is boorish enough to use a racial slur against another student.  And that that other student is violent enough to respond by giving someone possible head trauma.

The problem isn't white kids, and it's not black kids.  It's just kids.  I hope people will see that some day.

this beauty is choking me;;; but at least it's your hands around my neck.

The previously mentioned boy? He's out of the picture. Between that post and this I've:

1.) Kissed a boy I NEVER would have thought I'd be kissing

2.) Been Fired.

3.) Been dumped

4.) Fallen in love with someone I can't have back.

5.) Dyed my hair blonde.

6.) Dyed my hair brown.

7.) Dyed my hair back to black.

i love you all.

horray for skipping school today!

i spent the weekend not at home.
that is always nice.
but it also meant i wore the same clothes 3 days in a row..

anyways... i saw the features twice this weekend.
which automatically made it thousand times better.
fri= the clutters, feable weiner, the features @ tucker theatre
sat=1/2 the features [matt & parish], the mattoid, apollo up!@ grand palace
which of course equalled amusement watching the drunk kids.
that's alwas fun.
parish & matt:

apparently, harrison ford lives in cara's new house, & wears awesome hats:

pasta! [and cara]:


<3

wow, so i'm already more than half way done with Night, and i just started it today. it's good.

i'monna start reading Christopher Rice's Density of Souls next. Kohry let me borrow it. -it's his favourite-

yup. church tonight. that means tomorrow is thursday!

whoo hoo!

A new Hard Drive should've fixed all my problems, right?

like, blue screens gone, etc. . .

I mean, just correct me if i'm wrong here.

this is tremendous. no more horrid uploading of pictures for xanga!

i'm pretty excited about that...

i have a tatoo. picture to come later.

Sometimes you just gotta sniff anything that moves and hope it isn't a suicidal book whore.

This has been JAMAL'S QUOTE OF THE DAY!

Im a huge Fullmetal Alchemist fan. I've been keeping up with the storyline thus far and have come to the conclusion that I love watching the human emotions going thru the blender that is Fullmetal.

I found a baby zebra in my bath tub? To my surprise it coul'd speak perfect German, so I named him Luigi. Luigi fed my Grandma last night, which was originally my responsibility, so I got jealous. Then the fairy of Lincoln memorial came to my rescue and I still can't find my Grandma?

my doggie ate grapes

A thousand miles seems pretty far
but they've got planes and trains and cars
I'd walk to you if I had no other way.
Our friends would all make fun of us
but we'd just laugh along because
we know that none of them have felt this way.
And Delilah I can promise you
that by the time that we get through
the world will never ever be the same -
and you're to blame...

So, with Celebration of the Arts quickly approaching, we recieved our scripts...Sounds fun, right? Well...Not really. I get to be a knight in shining armor, and some type of scary dude, but the skits are really corny...Oh well, we'll see how it goes. Not alot has been going on...It's my mom's birthday today, so I'm staying home and cooking for the kids. I have to gain 4 lbs in 4 days for my fight or I move down a weight class. I have to get to 132 lbs...Oh well, I'll keep working on it. You all wish me good luck.

Thought for the Day: Why is it that you get OSS for skipping one class, but if you skip the whole day all they do is call your parents? The solution is that if you want to skip class, just don't come to school.

-The Legend of Chuck Norris-

(Must Read!) 
 
 

I first met Chuck Norris when I accompanied my sensei to the shooting of the movie "Sidekicks" at a martial arts tournament waaay back in the day. Nice guy, but man, there are so many rumors floating around about him. I suspect they are all true. Here's a list all the things I've heard from various sources.

When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till."
After you ask, "Two seconds till what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

Chuck Norris uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.

Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.

There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.

It was once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates to him.

Chuck Norris once lined up to kick the winning field goal of a high school football game. When the football went flat, he persuaded the referees to let him kick the field goal with a 3 month old child. Chuck roundhouse kicked the baby 60 yards through the uprights and then proceeded to bang every girl in the stadium.

When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."

Those aren't credits that roll after Walker Texas Ranger; it is actually a list of people that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked in the face that day.

If you unscramble the letters in "Chuck Norris" you get "Huck corn, sir." That is why every fall, Chuck travels to Nebraska and burns the entire state down.

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Chuck Norris does not have AIDS but he gives it to people anyway.

Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.

When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.

Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya".

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. His reasoning? It was more "humane".

Chuck Norris often asks people to pull his finger. When they do, he roundhouses them in the abdomen. Then he farts.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Chuck Norris took my virginity, and he will sure as hell take yours. If you're thinking to yourself, "That's impossible, I already lost my virginity." then you are dead wrong.

Chuck Norris uses a live rattle snake for a condom.

Aliens do exist. They're just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.

Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't f--k with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.

Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."

things change....it doesnt mean ill like it.... i just have to accept it!!!

GOD does some werid things ya know! but o well!

Love Through Christ!
~Rachel~

Do you have those days when everything is frustrating and you don't know why? That's how I feel right now...

I NEED LOTS OF

OR I WILL BE

I have figured out that whatever happens in my life, God always has something else amazing in store for me!  I had an amazing talk with one of my amazing friends and no matter what comes my way, I can be strong and open to new things because God has something good for me.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord,"plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."             --Jeremiah 29:11

Be blessed

-kate

so in my wonderful world civ class today we were discussing
The Defenestration of Prague

so i am sure you are sitting here reading this going "and what the heck does it mean to defenstrate someone?" as i was in claas
actually i was thinking
"bludgeon is soooo much better"

well- now i have a new fave word
defenestrate - to throw someone out a window

i know - amazing!

yes i also know this picture has nothing to do with this blog but it was fun

<3 112505

2 months =]

[ <3 Baby I Love Y o u ]

"It isnt about what your church name is, it is about what life you live."

Ok, so I had to let everyone know about this website that I have been addicted to lately... it is called Pandora.

Basically, if you like music, of any kind, you will love this site... especially if you love finding new artists that you have never heard before. Think of it as a radio station that knows exactly what music you like and plays it...

Here is what they are all about:

"Together we set out to capture the essence of music at the most
fundamental level. We ended up assembling literally hundreds of musical
attributes or "genes" into a very large Music Genome. Taken together
these genes capture the unique and magical musical identity of a song -
everything from melody, harmony and rhythm, to instrumentation,
orchestration, arrangement, lyrics, and of course the rich world of
singing and vocal harmony. It's not about what a band looks like, or
what genre they supposedly belong to, or about who buys their records -
it's about what each individual song sounds like.

Over the past 5 years, we've carefully listened to the songs
of over 10,000 different artists - ranging from popular to obscure -
and analyzed the musical qualities of each song one attribute at a
time. This work continues each and every day as we endeavor to include
all the great new stuff coming out of studios, clubs and garages around
the world."

Seriously, try it out. First, select an artist or a song that you like, and the player will begin to play something you may like. If you like it, click the album art and give it a thumbs up, and if you don't, give it a thumbs down. The system will begin to learn what you like... not like, what artists are similar, but actually the "genetic" makeup of the song and why you like it. It may take a while to learn your tastes, but when it does, you WILL BE AMAZED as the player starts playing music that you REALLY like, but you never heard of before.

This is really one of the best websites I have ever found!

PANDORA

Well I got two days of OSS.  I didn't want to do my ISS day so I didn't go and they gave me OSS and an extra day of it too.  So I slept in late and came to the library.  If I could find that damn receipt I would take back that hat.  Grr.  I'll have to ask my grandmother where it is.  I am going to go somewhere today before work.  But I don't know where.  Maybe the dam.  I don't want sex.  I don't want lust.  I just want to be loved.  Is that so fucking hard to find?  If I can't find a date for Prom before Febuary 23rd., then I am gonna go by myself.  I will be dressed in red and black or purple and black.  Not sure yet.

Vampire Heart

You can't escape the wrath of my heart
Beating to your funeral song
All faith is lust for hell regained
And love dust in the hands of shame

Let me bleed you this song of my heart deformed
And lead you along this path in the dark
Where I belong until I feel your warmth

Hold me like you held on to life
When all fears came alive and entombed me
Love me like you loved the sun
Scorching the blood in my vampire heart

I am the thorns in every rose, you've been sent by hope
I am the nightmare waking you up from the dream of a dream of love

Let me weep you this poem as heaven's gates close
And paint you my soul scarred and alone
Waiting for your kiss to take me back home

Hold me like you held on to life
When all fears came alive and entombed me
Love me like you loved the sun
Scorching the blood in my vampire heart

Rip Out The Wings Of A Butterfly

Heaven ablaze in your eyes
We're standing still in time
The blood on our hands is the wine
We offer as sacrifice

Come on and show them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul

This endless mercy mile
We're crawling side by side
With hell freezing over in our eyes
Gods kneel before our crime

Come on and show them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul

something about me is different since this picture was taken. i havent been home in a few weeks and it will probably be a few months before i come home again. so start guessing what about is different and i'll tell you if you right or not.

piece

photo from h_olly
Ya see those girls right there....Just so you know, they're amazing!The coolest girls you'll ever meet hands down.

Well, alot has happened since the last time I updated. I got a new car the other day, Jay Cutler has been on the news alot here lately, tennis season is starting here soon, Lauren is moving up here in about 3 months, the dude I was "talking" pretty much hates me now, but thats ok I'll get over it. Well, I guess I'm going to go now.

Elizabeth

He wasnt sure how the bathroom mirror worked
but decided it must be powered
by the razorblades and aspirin
he found in the engine compartment.

It was a matter of relearning everything
after he surfaced from the coma.

The hospital chapel had bought a battered
fog machine from a local heavy metal band
that broke up after disputes about
viking iconography.

Sitting in the back row, he began to pray
for his roommate, suffering
under the multi-variable complexity of back pain.

Clouds of steam drifted around his ankles.

-D

today = national compliment day
you know what to do...

In the airport bar, I tell my mother not to worry.
No one ever tripped and fell into the San Andreas
Fault. But as she dabs at her dry eyes, I remember
those old movies where the earth does open.

There's always one blonde entomologist, four
deceitful explorers, and a pilot who's good-looking
but not smart enough to take off his leather jacket
in the jungle.

Still, he and Dr. Cutie Bug are the only ones
who survive the spectacular quake because
they spent their time making plans to go back
to the Mid-West and live near his parents

while the others wanted to steal the gold and ivory
then move to Los Angeles where they would rarely
call their mothers and almost never fly home
and when they did for only a few days at a time.

-D

Ok, I have put up with the lack of creativity from the people in Hollywood.  Yes, we can all make sequels, we can take the same crap and revamp it and bring it up to date.  I mean, why should someone bring out something new, when we can just have Die Hard 4.  Now, I am a fan of the Die Hard series, but Bruce Willis is getting kind of old. I can live with most sequels, in fact, some are called for, but allow me to explain my rant.  In 1962, Disney introduced the world to Bambi, and yes, even as a guy I will say that it was a great movie.  But there is no excuse as to why 44 years later to release a sequel.  There was no cliffhanger ending in the first to allow for this.  What ever happened to living happily ever after and moving on.  What's next - Snow White 2: The 8th Drawf? But, on Feb. 7, Disney is releasing straight to DVD, Bambi 2...I hope Walt is turning over in his grave.  I mean, we have already seen classic television shows ruined by motion pictures (anyone remember "The Brady Bunch Movie" and the big screen flop of "Leave it to Beaver?") I hope someone out there shares my point of view and will help bring an end to the desecration of our childhood memories and the childhood memories of our parents.

-Daniel

so last night i was out driving with my boyfriend and well we went to Stonetrace McDonald's and filled out applications so we can be re-hired out there at Ariane's store.. well so we were leaving and we were sitting at the red light and i saw flashing lights and i turned around and there is a motorcycle cop.

and i thought well crap... so i pulled over on the shoulder and waited for him to come up to my door. And he asked for my stupid liscense and registration. so i gave them to me and he asked me if i knew why i was stopped and i said i didn't have a clue and he was like "The noise" and i said what?! and he was like your sterio... and i said but sir i don't have bass speakers and my radio wasn't turned up that loud. It was the car next to me. He said okay and did his thing at his little motorcycle.. ):

So i'm sitting there patiently, y'know, calling him all names under the sun... and well he comes back and says "so can you get a parent to come to court with you?" i said well... yeah... sure. he said "okay. well im not going to write a price on here so just go to court the judge usually dismisses them anyways!"

plus while all this is going on.. some dude driving down the road yells to the cop and says "officer - they was a wreck down yonder!!" and the cop starts mumbling that the guy is gonna cause a wreck.. it was just annoying! completely annoying.

so after i had left and gotten back to micky d's i looked closer at my "ticket" and the fricking dork didn't even write down my violation. >:| so in other words hes hoping i have to pay court costs so that he can fill his QUOTA! grr.... ):

but... at least he didn't write me anything that will go on my permanent record or anything. :D

well i've just concluded that cops are pricks.. and i dislike them all. (sorry rachael and amanda b's dads) but hey.. :) i was innocent!

im looking to get my new phone this weekend.. ill keep you posted mon' capitan!! <--which hey, today was hat day and i wore a sailor hat. :D lovely.

"Every time we come to a fork in the road
We choose one and go forward
But the other way we didn't choose
Always looks so bright
Why?



What's a Beautiful Day?
What's a Beautiful Day?
When you hesitate over a choice, surely (You know)
What's a Beautiful Day?
What's a Beautiful Day?
You already know
That you are just hesitating to choose the answer you want to choose

It's a Beautiful Day
It's a Beautiful Day
You don't have to be afraid

We are scared of tomorrow
Because we are so anxious about what we haven't yet seen
But if tomorrow is too obvious to see
It's so much boring
Don't you think so?

What's a Beautiful Day?
What's a Beautiful Day?
It's easy to get a beautiful moment, but (You know)
What's a Beautiful Day?
What's a Beautiful Day?
You already know
That you can't get beautiful things just by being beautiful

It's a Beautiful Day
It's a Beautiful Day
You don't have to be afraid

What's a Beautiful Day?
What's a Beautiful Day?
When you hesitate over a choice, surely (You know)
What's a Beautiful Day?
What's a Beautiful Day?
You already know
That you are just hesitating to choose the answer you want to choose






What's a Beautiful Day?
What's a Beautiful Day?
You already know
That you can't get beautiful things just by being beautiful"
-Ayu (Beautiful Day)

What's a Beautiful Day?
What's a Beautiful Day?
You already know
That you can't get beautiful things just by being beautiful"
-Ayu (Beautiful Day)

what is up everyone I am doing good right now I just had a good experience this morning and I wish it could have lasted but anywho How is everyone Because I am doing great. I now have a job at DEMOS' so come and eat their so you can see me ok I got to go right now so bye

I hadn't heard this song in a while, but I was listening to the radio and it came on. I remember hearing it played a lot after Prom and it really hit home. I have to modify it slightly b/c it is sung by Toby Keith about a girl but still it works. Well here they are Lyrics of the Day, slightly modified.

You Shouldn't Kiss Me Like This

I got a funny feeling
The moment that your lips touched mine
Something shot right through me
My heart skipped a beat in time

There's a different feel about you tonight
It's got me thinkin' lots of crazy things
I even think I saw a flash of light
It felt like electricity

You shouldn't kiss me like this
Unless you mean it like that
Cause I'll just close my eyes
And I won't know where I'm at
We'll get lost on this dance floor
Spinnin' around
And around
And around
And around

They're all watchin' us now
They think we're falling in love
They'd never believe we're just friends
When you kiss me like this
I think you mean it like that
If you do baby kiss me again

Everybody swears we make the perfect pair
But dancing is as far as it goes
Boy you've never moved me quite
The way you moved me tonight
I just wanted you to know
I just wanted you to know

You shouldn't kiss me like this
Unless you mean it like that
Cause I'll just close my eyes
And I won't know where I'm at
And We'll get lost on this dance floor
Spinnin' around
And around
And around
And around

They're all watchin' us now
They think we're falling in love
They'd never believe we're just friends
When you kiss me like this
I think you mean it like that
If you do baby kiss me again
Kiss me again

Today would be hat day @ school.
Yay.
I'm wearing my spiffy TOOL hat :D
Ohhh yeahh.
Worship me.

i have not completed any of my model UN work

NONE

i love this picture and it has absolutely nothing to do with my entry.  i have been swamped with homework. i have a soliloquey to memorize, some section in history to do, a section in sociology to do, a test to study for and so much more. oh well. lylas

as of right now school seriously sucks MORE than it ususally does.. THREE test today.. ((one in every class but KEYBoARDING)) 2 projects due FRIDAY in the SAME class, test thursday, test friday, thursday have to go BACK to kaylas house to work on ONE of the projects more, went to her house monday and tuesday night and we ARE NOT done yet.. today ((WED)) study like CRAZY and finish other project, FRIDAY night get a break and go to LINDSEYS, SATURDAY got youth fundraising, SUNDAY got church... busy busy busy.. TUESDAY ((yesturday)) i was @ school for the regular times.. 8:30-3:30 then got to kaylas around 4:15ish and did MORE school work ((project for BUSINESS)) for ANOTHER FOUR HOURS!! crazy eh? uh school just basically SUCKS right now.. maybe its just this week.. idk.. well i better go get ready to go FAIL half my test!! uhhh.. i hate school right now.. maybe next week will get better..

....hopefully it will...

I have been giving it some serious thought lately and I would like some honest opinions.

What could I change about me that would make me a better person?

What is there about me that you would deffinitly not want changed about me?

Gotta watch!!!!

http://www.stupidvideos.com/commercials/worstjob/

well lets see i just got this site up and running and expect to keep it up and running constantly. imma try to update weekly on thoughts or feelings or just plan enough how my day went. well if yall want to check my other blog sites: www.xanga.com/seraphimkid or www.myspace.com/seraphimkid . check it. well imma go now and yall have a good week. peace

Actually, let's hear it for all single moms out there trying to turn mean little boys into real gentlemen one day. I spoke to my Mom yesterday inbetween classes and we probably had one of our most open and honest conversations we've had since I was probably 5. I guess it was around that age I began to be afraid of my Mom and what she really thought about some of the things her middle son wanted to do or had already done.

But yesterday somehow I think I really became an adult in her eyes and she talked to me like I was living my own life, not the one her or the rest of the family had planned out. I have to give my mom so much credit and I am so thankful that I could have someone like her raise me. When my Dad split on her when I was seven she was thrown into the reality of trying to raise and take care of 3 very needy boys who most of the time were trying to kill each other.

My mom was fantastic with us, especially with me. When I was 7 years old she took and a bunch of my buddies to Six Flags for the first time and it was there my life changed a little bit. After riding my first coasters there was something inside of me and the only thing I wanted to do after that was go back for more. Over the years we went back time and time again and at that point in my life it was just for the "fun" of riding them that kept me coming back. But one spring break, my mom gathered enough money up to take her 3 sons on a trip, that I look back on now, that will probably be the most influential 3 days of my life.

We packed up the car and headed down to tampa. Just imagine, a 7, 10, and 13 year-old crammed in the car for 8 hours just screaming and fighting; and yet we never turned around like she threatened too so many times. Odd now that I think about it, I don't know if I could have done it. Anyways. After riding my first ride on Kumba, my life was forever changed. I always say it was my first "real" coaster. Smooth, 7 inversions. A lift hill of 153 feet. My first "real Big" coaster anyway. I realized that someone out there had to design these things. And because of what my mom said, I could do it.

Now if you analyze my brothers and me I'm more like the black sheep of the family considering I'm the only out of drugs, went to college, and does not do manual labor. Now, there's a lot of pressure in my family for me to do "something" with my life. But the other day, my mom and I talked and it seemed that for the first time in my life; my dreams became hers. It was about being a doctor like my grandparents wanted, or a lawyer like my dad wanted; it was about what I wanted to do. That support is amazing. But my mom is so much more than that...

She's taught me so much about love and how to treat a lady. Something which I feared I have fallen away from lately, and I feel absolutely terrible. I remember one time I was fifteen and she picked me and my girlfriend up from the movies. We just hopped in. And as soon as I got in the car she yelled at me and made me get back out and open the door for my date. Embarrassing. But needed.

I feel like I owe all my good qualities to her. Now I have to admit I do get my eyes from my dad, but the good stuff is all from her I know. And I know that there is no way I could be sitting here 400 miles from everything I've ever known if it wasn't for her. I don't this doesn't matter to most, but its been on my mind since yesterday and I don't ever want to forget how special the #1 lady in my life is. So ladies if you're out there, you've got a tough act to follow....