I forgot how much i love spending time with my brother's family. I came up last night to help them get ready for their trip to my parents... TOday I have gotten to play Aunt Kim... Helping them make fun creations... making them lunch... the best parts have been moments when they just lean over and hug me or tell me that they love me. It makes my heart smile. I don't know if i can go longer then a month anymore before seeing them. So much has changed in the 9 weeks its been since i've seen them.

I am just soaking in the love... I am like a spunge... can't get enough...

Just realized something... I am THAT GIRL... You know the one... the one who can have all problems fixed if you just give her Chocolate Ice Cream (preferably with peanut butter). Serious... all my problems can be solved with that. If I am sad or lonely, stressed or just BLAH... bring me some chocolate peanut butter Ice cream and I am good. ;) That's the way life should be. Of course there are other superficial things that can help too but Chocolate Peanut Butter Ice Cream will always work.

I miss you guys... ooh got to go get the ice cream... tee hee.

OK i have a funny story for my 4th floor hallmates this summer. Ok we had atleast 3 people, at times much more then that, getting ready at one time. Karalee with her Hair... me with my hair... Curling irons, TV's music... etc. Not once did we ever blow a fuse. Ok well today... its just me. No one else on this entire floor. HEc, the building... and what do i do. Blow a fuse. GIrls. THe building misses you.

Its so quiet here without everyone. SAdness.

I can't believe its all over. I will miss all you guys who graced me and this building with your presence. I adore you with my whole heart. Please keep in touch.

You got to love it when people show you a piece of who they really are. I don't think we always know what some underhanded comment can do to someone's morale... Our words and actions can really have an impact even when we meant them innocently...

Hmmm... YOu know for the last 6 months I have been asked almost everyday what I want to do when my term is up here in NYC... and I can never give an answer... cause well i have no DANG clue... I can't see myself out of New York... away from Mosaic and the thought still makes my stomach turn... Leaving NY will be like losing a limb. Well I have a friend (former boss) that has been trying for years to get me to move to SAn Diego or Los Angelos to work for him and NAMB... well today he tried to talk me into more of the same. I virtually told him no and then he brought up the possibility of working for him at NAMB in Atlanta... and a month ago i would have said H**L no... but i found myself intrequed... I in no means feel its a huge option right now cause a lot can happen in a year... but it definitely got my intention. The request came when we were talking about communication and how we (as a church/denomation) suck at it... He told me he wanted me to be in charge of that for SFC... now he may just be talking but it definitely got my intention since communication has been my biggest professional frustration over the last 6 years.

Interesting... got my attention... not that i think i am moving to Atlanta cause i don't think that... but its out there.

It is beginning to hit me that the support system that I created this summer is leaving. THat makes me so sad but excited for them/you as well. You guys are going to be able to take NEw York with you when you leave and all of your experiences. I am going to miss you guys. THanks for sharing your lives with me. I love each of you.

I love it when God gives me a new perspective... when he blows apart what the world says something should look like.

TOday I find therapy in words... WRiting for me is like purging... It doesn't have to look pretty... and hell, noone has to ever see that intimacy he provides through words but at the very least I know that God's using creativity to get this mess together. He's just so good and creative. I guess that's why He's God.

Psalm 3:3-6

Interlude
3 But you, O LORD, are a shield around me, my glory, and the one who lifts my head high.
4 I cried out to the LORD, and he answered me from his holy mountain.

Interlude
5 I lay down and slept. I woke up in safety, for the LORD was watching over me.
6 I am not afraid of ten thousand enemies who surround me on every side.

If this was a painting i could stare at it for hours. HOw beautiful!!

I think its going to be one of those days

Do you ever have one of those days where you wish taking a deep breath would fix everything?

OK Laura, you inspired me.
Things I need to do in the next 24 hours:
Go out of my way for someone else
Be Real even when it is painful beyond words
Allow myself to be used
get some rest
buy or rent Kindgarden Cop
Tell someone NO
Tell someone Yes
Go for a walk with just me, my ipod and Jesus
Buy toilet paper
Tell those important to me that I LOVE THEM even if its awkward
WRITE WRITE WRITE
Share some of that with someone.