Yeah, I know.  I should be writing those three papers due tomorrow (two of which are in a completely different language).

There was a mouse in my CPU at like 4:30 this morning.  No, it was not attached by a cord.  Little bugger woke me up.  Blah.  Death to all rodents.  I briefly considered turning the computer on and electrocuting it, but multiple unwarranted bursts of reason prevented this.
1.) I'd have small pangs of remorse that would gradually grow as I drank coffee and thus became human.
2.) It'd ruin my computer.
3.) If it didn't ruin my computer, I'd still be scraping fried mouse out of the myriad of gears that make the machine work.  Not exactly the way I'd planned to spend my spare week.
4.) Two words: karmic smackdown.

So instead I reflected on the benefits of cyanide.
Charming.

Okay.  Now I'm going to go write those papers.

Oh yeah, I turned in my two-week notice at Shoney's today.
And Mum says I can attend bartending school so long as Daddy doesn't disown me.  Score!
And my right hand is curiously swollen from two college applications that I randomly decided to fill out last night.  I always knew higher education would come to no good!

....Paper??