photo from Ed_The_Angry_Jew

good times.


however, i find myself contradicting what i have previously stated that i want. which is not good, because i have no idea what i need to make me happy.

me

photo from Ed_The_Angry_Jew

beautiful? i think so.

i bet you know.

We're the kids who feel like dead ends
And I want to be known for my hits, not just my misses



hmm...comment?

i feel really bad.

where nothings wrong, but nothings right.

know what i mean?

so, second. its not first, but its not last, and we lost it by a half of a point. and we still have 4 more.

anyway, i fell asleep on the bus. and when i woke up no one else was on the bus. oops.

so, im going to go eat something.

edit

oh and i totally forgot the 2 best parts of the night:

1. when we were jazz running all the other bands on the stands behind us were screaming for us and cheering us on. it made me smile really big.

2. when the announcer asked if the band was ready and our crowd said "they're always ready!" that was cool too.

yeah pretty sure thats ryan *slight grin*

anyway daily buffet tommorow. be there or be square. or be at smileys.

*is jealous and give evil glare to every soul going to the coldplay concert*

thats ok. i will find my concert

also, the oc was a-frickin-mazing. as always.

HENDERSONVILLE GOLDEN INVITATIONAL saturday, wewillrockyou.

the eeeend.
leave me a commennnt erm remark!

^death cab

ok, so, even though this is huge, your job is to answer them all. so, go for it. even if you dont want to.

"The twenty-three questions I ask everybody I meet in order to decide if I can really love them:"

1. Let us assume you met a rudimentary magician. Let us assume he can do five simple tricks -- he can pull a rabbit out of his hat, he can make a coin dissapear, he can turn the ace of spades into the joker card, and two others in similar vein. These are his only tricks and he can't learn any more; he can only do these five. HOWEVER, it turns out he's doing these five tricks with real magic. It's not an illusion; he can actually conjure the bunny out of the ether and he can move the coin throuhg space. He's legitimately magical, but extremely limited in scope and influence. Would this person be more impressive than Albert Einstein?

2. Let us assume a fully grown, completely healthy Clydesdale horse has his hooves shackled to the ground while his head is heal in place with thick rope. He is conscious and standing upright, but completely immobile. And let us assume that -- for some reason -- every political prisoner one earth (as cited by Amnesty International) will be released from captivity if you can kick this horse to death in less than twenty minutes. You are allowed to wear steel-toed boots. Would you attempt to do this?

3. Let us assume there are two boxes on a table. In one box there is a relatively normal turtle; in the other, Adolf Hitler's skull. You have to select one of these items for your home. If you select the turtle, you can't give it away and you have to keep it alive for two years; if either of these parameters are not met, you will be fined $999 by the state. If you select Hitler's skull, you are required to display it in a semi-prominant location in your living room for the same amount of time, although you will be paid a stipend of $120 per month for doing so. Display of the skull must be apolitical. Which option do you select?

4. Genetic engineers at Johns Hopkins University announce that they have developed a so-called "super gorilla." Though the animal cannot speak, it has a sign language lexicon of over twelve thousand words, an I.Q. of almost 85 and -- most notably -- a vague sense of self-awareness. Oddly, the creature (who weighs seven hundred pounds) becomes fascinated by football. The gorilla aspires to play the game at its highest level and quickly develops the rudimentary skills of a defensive end. ESPN analyst Tom Jackson speculates that this gorilla would be "borderline unblockable" and would likely average six sacks a game (although Jackson concedes the beast might be susceptible to counters and misdirection plays). Meanwhile, the gorilla has made it clear he would never intentionally injure any opponent. You are the commisioner of the NFL: Would you allow this gorilla to sign with the Oakland Raiders?

5. You meet your soul mate. However, there is a catch: Every three years, someone will break both of your soul mate's collarbones with a Crescent wrench, and there is only one way you can stop this from happening: You must swallow a pill that will make every songyou hear -- for the rest of your life -- sound as if it's being played by the band Alice in Chains. When you hear Creedence Clearwater Revival on the radio, it will sound (to your ears) like it's being played by Allice in Chains. If you see Radiohead live, every one of their tunes will sound like it's being covered by Alice in Chains. When you hear a commercial jingle on TV, it will sound like Alice in Chains; if you sing to yourself in the shower, your voice will sound like deceased Alice vocalist Layne Staley performing a capella (but will only sound this way to you). Would you swallow the pill?

6. At long last someone invents "the dream VCR." This machine allows you to tape an entire evenings worth of you own dreams, which you can watch at your leisure. However, the inventor of the dream VCR will only allow you to use this device if you agree to a strange caveat: When you watch your dreams, you must do so with your family and your closest friends in the same room. They get to watch your dreams along with you. And if you don't agree to this, you can't use the dream VCR. Would you still do this?

7. Defying all expectation, a group of Scottish marine biologists capture a live Loch Ness Monster. In an almost unbelievable coincidence, a bear hunter in the Northwest shoots a Sasquatch in the thigh, thereby allowing zoologists to take the furry monster into captivity. These events happen on the same afternoon. That evening, the president announce he may have thyroid cancer and will undergo a biopsy later that week. You are the front-page editor of the New York Times: What do you play as the biggest story?

8. You meet the perfect person. Romantically this person is ideal. You find them physicall attractive, intellectually stimualting, consistently funny, and deeply compassionate. However, they have one quirk: This individual is obsessed with Jim Henson's gothic puppet fantasy The Dark Crystal. Beyond watching it on DVD at least once a month, he/she peppers casual conversation with Dark Crystal references, uses Dark Crystal analogies to explain everyday events, and occasionally likes to talk intensely about the films "deeper phylosophy." Would this be enough to stop you from marrying this individual?

9. A novel entitled Interior Mirror is released to mammoth commercial success (despite middling reviews). However, a curious social trend emerges: Though no one can prove a direct scientific link, it appears that almost 30% of the people who read this book immediately become homosexual. Many of these newfound homosexuals credit this book for helping them reach this conclusion about their orientation, despite the fact that Interior Mirror is ostensibly a crime novel with no homoerotic content (and was written by a straight man). Would this phenomenon increase (or decrease) the likelihood of you reading this book?

10. This is the opening day of Jay McInerney's Bright Lights, Big City: "You are not the kind of guy who would be in a place like this at this time of morning." Think about that line in the context of the novel (assuming you've read it). Now go to your CD collection and find Heart's Little Queen album (asuming you own it). Listen to the opening riff of "Barracuda." Which of these two introductions is a higher form of art?

11. You are watching a movie in a crowded theater. Though the plot is mediocre, you find youself dazzled by the special effects. But with twenty minutes left in the film, you are struck with an undeniable feeling of doom: You are suddenly certain your mother has just died. there is no logical reason for this to be true, but you are certain of it. You are overtaken with the irrational metaphysical sense that -- somewhere -- your mom has just perished. But this is only an intuitive, amorphous feeling; there is no evidence for this, and your mother has not been ill. Would you immediately exit the theater, or would you finish watching the movie?

12. You meet a wizard in downtown Chicago. The wizard tells you he can make you more attractive if you pay him money. when you ask how this process works, the wizrd points to a random person on the street. You look at this random stanger. The wizard says, " I will now make them a dollar more attractive." He waves his magic wand. Ostensibly, this person does not change at all; as far as you can tell, nothing is different. But -- somehow -- this person is suddenly a little more appealing. The tangible difference is invisible to the naked eye, but you can't deny that this person is vaguely sexier. This wizard has a weird rule, though -- you can only pay him once. You can't keep giving him money until you're satisfied. You can only pay him one lump sum up front. Hor much cash do you give the wizard?

13. Every person you have ever slept with is invited to a banquet where you are the guest of honor. No one will be in attendance except you, the collection of your former lovers, and the catering service. After the meal, you are asked to give a fifteen-minute speech to the assembly. What do you talk about?

14. For reasons that cannot be explained, cats can suddenly read at a twelfth- grade level. They can't talk and they can't write, but they can read silently and undertsand the text. Many cats love this new skill, because they now have something to do all day while they lay around the house; however, a few cats become depressed, because reading forces them to realize the limitations of their existence (not to mention the utter frustration of not being able to express themselves). This being the case, do you think the average cat would enjoy Garfield, or would cats find this cartoon to be an insulting caricature?

15. You have a brain tumor. Though there is no discomfort at the moment, this tumor would unquestionalbly kill you in six months. However, your life can (and will) be saved by an operation; the only downside is that there will be a brutal incision to your frontal lobe. After the surgery, you will be significanlty less intelligent. You will still be a fully functional adult, but you will be less logical, you will have a terrible memory, and you will have little ability to understand complex concepts or difficult ideas. The surgery is in two weeks. How do you spend the next fourteen days?

16. Someone builds an optical portal that allows you to see a vision of your own life in the future (its essentially a crystal ball that shows a randomly selected image of what your life will be like in twenty years). You can only see into this portal for thirty seconds. When you finally peer into the crystal, you see yourself in a living room, two decades older than you are today. You are watching a Canadian football game, and you are extremely happy. You are wearing a CFL jersey. Your chair is surrounded by books and magazines that promote the CFL, and there are CFL pennants covering your walls. You are alone in the room, but you are muttering gleefully about historical moments in Canadian football history. It becomes clear that -- for some unknown reason -- you have become obsessed with Canadian football. And this future is static and absolute; no matter what you do, this future will happen. The optical portal is never wrong. This destiny cannot be changed. The next day, you are flipping through television channels and randomly come across a pre-season CFL game between the Toronto Argonauts and the Saskatchewan Roughriders. Knowing your inevitable future, do you now watch it?

17. You are sitting in an empty bar (in a town you've never before visited), drinking Bacardi with a soft-spoken acquaintance you barely know. After an hour, a third indivitdual walks into the tavern and sits by himself, and you ask your acquaintance who the man is. "Be careful of that guy," you are told. "He is a man with a past." A few minutes later a fourth person enters the bar; he also sits alone. You ask your acquaintance who this new individual is. "Be careful of that guy, too," he says. "He is a man with no past." Which of these two people do you trust less?

18. You have won a prize. The prize has two options, and you can choose either (but not both). The first is a year in Europe with a monthly stipend of $2,000. The second option is ten minutes on the moon. Which option do you select?

19. Your best friend is taking a nap on the floor in the living room. Suddenly, you are faced with a bizarre existential problem: This friend is going to die unless you kick them (as hard as you can) in the rib cage. If you don't kick them while they slumber, they will never wake up. However, you can never explain this to your friend; if you later inform them that you did this to save their life, they will also die from that. So you have to kick a sleeping friend in the ribs, and you can't tell them why. Since you cannot tell your friend the trth, what excuse will you fabricate to explain this (seemingly inexplicable) attack?

20. For whatever reason, two unauthorized movies are made about your life. The first is an independently released documentary, primarily comprised of interviews with people who know you and bootleg footage from your actualy life. Critics are describing the documentary as "brutally honest and relentlessly fair." Meanwhile, Columbia Tri-Star has produced a big-budget biopic of your life, casting major Hollywood stars as you and all your acquaintances; though the movie is based on actual events, screenwriters have taken some liberites with the facts. Critics are split on the artistic merits of this fictionalized account, but audiences love it. Which film would you be most interested in seeing?

21. Imagine you could go back to the age of five and relive the rest of your life, knowing everything that you know now. You will reexperience your entire adolescence with both the cognitive ability of an adult and the memories of everything you've learned from having lived your life previously. Would you lose your virginity earlier or later than you did the first time around (and by how many years)?

22. You work in an office. Generally, you are popular with your coworkers. However, you discover there are currently two rumors circulationg the office gossip mill, and both involve you. The first rumor is that you got drunk at the office holiday party and had sex with on eof your married coworkers. This rumor is completely true, but most people don't believe it. The second rumor is that you have been stealing hundreds of dollars of office supplies (and then selling them to cover a gambling debt). This rumor is completely false, but virtually everyone assumes it is factual. Which of these two rumors is most troubling to you?

23. Consider this possibility: a. Think about deceased TV star John Ritter. b)Now pretend Ritter had never become famous. Pretend he was never affected by the trappings of fame, and try to imagine what his personality would have been like. c) now imagine this person -- the unfamous John Ritter -- is a character in a situation comedy. d) Now, you are also a character on this sitcom, and the unfamous john Ritter character is your sitcom father. e) However, the sitcom is actually your real life. In other words, you are living inside a sitcom: Everything about your life is a construction, featuring the unfamous John Ritter playing himself (in the role of your TV father). But this is not a sitcom. This is your real life. How would you feel about this?

i went to one of the shelters today and it was really sad.

in other news, mady's cool. thats why she had a birthday party. because shes cool.

the end.

we won, again. woot? one of the mount juliet people threw a football down at our band. and it hit me. of course. and it didnt feel very good.

i was quite proud of myself, actually, because i didnt get mad at grace. unlike last week. however, i was, hmm i dont know how to put this, so, i wont.

anyway. time to go, bye.

it was perfect. everything i hoped for and more.


AND i'm tired.


leave me a comment, please.

i'm a horrible person. :-[

edit:

holy crizap. "what sarah said" on the death cab cd, well, the new one, is like, the saddest song ever. :-( poo on that.

"love is watching someone die"

^ see what i mean *sad*

its mady's birthday tommorow. mady's really cool, really short, and says my name in a really shrill voice!

which means she deserves a shout out!

unless shes lying, and its not her birthday, but nonetheless, i will buy her chocolate.

haha, so, i dont know how my day was, i will judge this based on tommorow/the rest of the week.

so, hopefully someone doesnt hate me, like i suspect. honestly, i really do think this person hates me. so, pray for me and my situation, and hope it works out for the best!

thanx guys,
stay cool kids,
sara.

i dare you to move.

how can you say your life feels empty, so late in the day?

well it's love, make it hurt.

i know ugliness, now show me something pretty.

this is fact, not fiction, for the first time in years.

i've never cared too much about honesty.

so it's sad this doesn't suit you now, and me fresh out of rope.

we're losing ground with every passing day.

you don't know me, but i'm sitting next to you.

it's too much to ask for when there's no attraction anymore.

blood and tears, they were here first.

i promise you i will learn from my mistakes.

for you i'd wait, til kingdom come.

I'll be your best kept secret.

Can't you see the grass is greener where it rains.

With your hand on my shoulders, a meaningless movement... a moviescript ending.

You may say that I'm a dreamer but I'm not the only one.

I lost my love, my life that night.

So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,blue skies from pain.

It's a lie, a kiss with opened eyes.

We are so far from you.

So you know you're never on your own.

And you know that until the stars fall I will always love you.

You don't care a bit.

It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah.

But what goes up must come down.

Tonight won't make a difference

So I guess we aren't garbage anymore. It's rediculous to me how immature oaklands students are. We were marching out to the stadium, and a bunch of the students started honking their horns at us. Seriously, we never rub it in their faces that our band is better than theirs. In fact, we go out of our way not to. But they are always bringing it up. Its ok though, because we stood tall and it payed off in the end.

So if you havent heard a billion times by now, we won last night. 20-14. I was so proud.

Then on the bus we all sang Bohemian Rhapsody at the top of our lungs. Thats always been on of my favorite things about competitions. And now that our team is winning, i guess that will be one of my favorite things about football games too. Caitlin, Brittany, and Myself also sang "Hollaback Girl" and "Whiskey Lullaby". Good times.

There was a minor snag in my night. But I'm good now. Thank you again. I will probably wear out that thank you, but I mean it. Just the fact that you cared enough to come to my house and drive to the mall just to buy me a cookie and make me feel better, was really cool. And I promise you i will give this a valiant effort. Unless of course, this hinders (sp?) your happiness. Because as you said yourself, my friends happiness is more important than some boy.

Anyway, I'm going to go do homework! SCORE! kidding

Quote from last night:
Me and Brittany at the top of our lungs:
"WHOS YOUR DADDY????? THATS HOW YOU PLAY FOOTBALL!!! WHOS GARBAGE NOW? WHOS YOUR DADDDDDYYYY?!?!?!?!?!"

we're just awesome that way.

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one

^ i LOVE that song

well today was quite grand. the morning, before school was pretty bad, but school itself was good. i blame it all on the pep rally and loading the band trailer.

today in 5th we spent 10 minutes trying to figure out why the piano wasnt working. come to find out because you need speakers for it to work

in other news, game tonight, then steak and shake.

stay cool kids.

so, as i'm sure most of you know, there was a hurricane that struck new orleans, florida, georgia, and alabama a couple of days ago. *gasp* right? well, atlanta had some furious tornadoes that swept through as a result of the back winds. well, gas in atlanta right now is about $6 a gallon. and this is what is known as gauging. you know, "taking advantage" of the situation. some of these people have nothing left, and now they cant afford to leave. also, 10% of the worlds oil is in louisiana, which means 10% of it is gone. so my question is: why arent we as a nation trying to find a way to power cars without using gas? there is solutions to this problem, we just arent taking advantage of it. we are letting the problem get progrssively worse and worse, and we arent doing a thing about it. its rediculous to me that we arent at least trying, instead we are making these people stay in horrible places. taking advantage of the innocent. i just wish i was older so i could try to do something about this, not to mention help with the aftermath of the hurricane. to me those things are more important than learning abot chemistry and algebra. making a difference, even if its a small one, is worth putting that stuff off to wait.

the end, i have to go.

i really do. clothes wont matter when you die people, keep that in mind.

also, i did way worse on my math test than anyone else.

so all in all, today sucked.

so, as im sure youve heard more times than you wish, we are out of school tommorow.


and im not doing anything besides eating mexican food. and watching the oc season 2.

i have a 99 in math.

i win, you lose.

btw, dont go see the brothers grimm, its a nasty attack.

r kelly just performed trapped in the closet and played all the parts himself. including a man his wife, and the man's boyfriend.

it was quite possibly one of the most disturbing things ive ever seen.

in 1995 catherine zeta jones remaid a michael bolton song.

today was drum corp day in fifth period.

oh yeah and, grace is evil. :-)

so, i have 2-5 jazz runs at the end of the drum solo. and there are 2 of them. i look like a baboon that is trying to take flight, and is failing miserably.

and i landed on the side of my ankle, twice.

gotta love band.