So I can't believe it...last night I was sitting here, or actually in my room! And it dawns on me! It was Aug. 4!! I'm sure you're like, "Ok, Amber, I'm glad you can actually realize what day it is! Big step up for you!" But...lol...let me finsh!! After I realize what day it was, I realized what happened 3 years ago! I commited to not dating for one year!! And God had longer in store! Cause it's been 3 years since I've dated!! WOW!!! That's amazing to me!! I went from a girl who couldn't go a month without a boyfriend, to a women who doesn't want a boyfriend.....but Jesus!! And not just a boyfriend, but in Gods timing, my husband! Hummmmmmm!! It's mind-blowing!! In the past 3 years, God has taken me through many things! And a lot of changing and breaking! And continues to do so! The first year I learned, I can handle not dating and God changed my mind on who I was choosing to date! The second year I learned, that the only man I need is God! And my views on dating completly were changing!! I desired a Godly-man, one that desires God above me, and much more! God gave me desires and standards for my husband! And last but not least...this past year! WOW!! God's blown my mind with all the stuff!! He changed my heart!!! (And is continueing to!) He taught me several things through one of my friends!! He blessed me with a friendship that I've prayed about for a long time and through that friendship, God changed me and my views! And helped me gain wisdom and joy! Don't get me wrong, it wasn't my friend who did this changing....it was God in him!! (Thanks to this friend, who has been willing enough to allow God to work through you, to impact me!) But I learned that love isn't a fairy tale!! (READ THAT AGAIN GIRLS!!!) It isn't!! It has it's up and downs! Fun times and hard times! A time for being joyful and a time for brokeness! Also, marriage...isn't about us!! It's about God!! It all is!! Marriage is an accountablity!! It's promises to be there in the good and bad times! It is so that the two of you can imbody the full image of God and to GLORIFY....who?....HIM!!!!! It's not about all the stuff the world pulls us into!! It's for God's story! And it's God's blessing!! Also, I've learned guys aren't perfect...don't hold them to be!! They can't say or do everything we want or dream them to do! The only man like that...is Jesus!!! (He's the one to fall in love with! lol!!) But I also learned that the reason I sat starands so high, was because, I knew not one single man on this earth could meet that! So I knew they'd fall and I knew I could protect myself and push them away! Which comes to what God is doing in me right now!! He is healing me!! He is wanting to take my heart and mold it the way He's wanted to all along! Sure, it won't be the most enjoyable experience.....there will be tears, the will be hurt, there will be questions, there will be brokeness and loniness....BUT I'm not going through it by myself!! And the reason I am and will go through this, is to bring glory to God! And have a story to share with the lost, the searching, etc.!! Don't you see..your pain and sufferings are so you can relate to others!! It's not to destory you...our God isn't about that!! It's so you can go into this world and relate with His people!! I know God is preparing me for my husband...and that is so exciting for me!! But until God has me to a point where He knows I'm ready and trusts me with such a Godly-man, man that is so amazing I can't even dream of, a man that desires God, a man that has a heart like mine and will treat me as I should be treated....I will have to wait! Cause I want to be the wife that he needs!! The kinda wife that can stand strong behind my husband, that can build him up, that can hold him accountiable, etc!! Course God's taught me so much this year! And done so much awesome stuff I could probably write a book! But...for ya'lls sake...I won't ;) lol!!
Anyways...ya'll have an AMAZING night!! I love ya'll every much!!