yourself

October 15 2007

Words of wisdom from my Paw Paw: Be yourself. 'Cause if you act one way around one person, and another way around another person, how will you act if you are around them at the same time.

HEY

October 15 2007

So, i love this song.

I Dont Know Why... i just do :)

 


Mood: Feeling RandomWell theres not much for me to tell you guys. I'm feeling random, but thats nothing new to you guys :-) Other then talking to my dad and doing school while every 1 else was out. Nothing big has happened to me. Oh yeah, my brother has his friends over ALL the time. I suppose its not a bad thing since i get along with all of them and they are all pretty nice to me but...still its kinda a pain when i walk down in my P-J's and theres a room of guys sitting there. Ok so now i have nothing else to tell you guys :-)Hope you guys are doing FANTASTIC

copycat

October 15 2007

I don't really know what the point of these things are, but I'm bored, and they can be kind of fun when you're bored.

 

Red=Anger

1. Are you currently mad at someone?

nope

2. Which of your family members has the worst temper?

my dad...or me

3. Have you ever thrown anything at someone?

yep. at my sister. too many things to count

4. Does your face turn red when you're angry?

not really i guess. my cheeks and ears are always red though.

5. When you're mad do you prefer to stare angrily or yell?

depends really. yell at my sister. i don't really stare angrily. i prefer the silent treament

Orange=Excitment

1.Has anyone ever thrown a suprise for you?

no. i wish. that would be fun.

2. Are you easily excited?

yes. it's sad. i get my hopes up a lot.

3. What event is coming up that you're most excited about?

europe, baby! well it's next summer. but i'm really excited though.

4. If you won a million dollars, what would be your first thought?

holy cow!

5. If you could have anything right now what would it be?

i don't know. a bigger house.

Yellow=Self Discovery

1. Name?

Megan Lynn Bell

2. Birthday?

March 8, 1993

3. What's your main goal in life?

live my life to the fullest as God would want me to

4.Do you want to have children?

yeah. when i'm married.

5. How do you want to die?

um, i don't know. i haven't really thought about it.

Green=Opinions

1. Are you against gay marriage?

absoulutely

2. Lower the drinking age?

no. raise the age...to about 400.

3. Capital punishment?

yes...and no.

4. Abortion?

yes. absolutely.

5. Democrat or republican?

don't really have a comment. i'm not very political.

Blue=Love

1. Do you love someone?

of course. who doesn't?

2. Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

no. wish i did though, but i have other things to worry about...like school.

3. Is is better to have loved and lost, then to not have loved at all?

i guess. but it's still sad.

4. Do you believe in love at first sight?

i mean i guess it could happen.

5. Would you tatoo your lover's name on your body?

no. tatooes are tacky.

Purple=Q&A

Q.How many beds did lie in today?

one

Q. How much cash do you have on you right now?

$1.50

Q. Look to your left. What is there?

a bookshelf with a jewerly box on it.

Q. What is the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?

some of sydnee's sister's clothes when i spent the night.

Q. What website(s) do you visit most during the day?

phusebox, yahoo, email, and student ambassador alumni.

Q. Do you have any plants in your room?

no

Q. Does anything on your body hurt right now?

yes. my leg. i hurt it stretching at dance tonight.

Q. What city was your last taxi ride in?

i've never been in a taxi.

Q. Do you own a picture phone?

yes. and a crappy one.

Q. Recent time you really upset?

probably something over the summer. or bad grade this year.

Pink=Last

1. Person you saw?

sydnee at dance. or i guess my sister just 5 secs ago.

2. Last person that said they loved you?

my mom when i was saying good night.

3. Movie watched in cinema?

harry potter. i think.

4. Song you listend to?

don't go. billy ray and miley cyrus. i actually kind of like this song, even though miley is WAY overated.

5. Last person you talked on the phone with?

carmen.

Grey=Today

1. What are you doing right now?

this, drinking, and hoping for something good.

2. What are you doing tonight?

had dance, hw, and soon i'll be sleeping.

3. What are you going to eat?

nothing now. it's almost time for me to sleep.

4. Did you accomplish something today?

leaps at dance, dance at dance, and hw.

5. What shoes are you wearing right now?

none. i'm barefooted. i hate shoes.

Brown=Tomorrow

1. Is?

tuesday, school, and crappy english paper revising. blah.

2. My plans are?

going to school, eating, doing hw, strengthing dance, and cheerleading.

3. Are you going to laugh?

of course. when do i not? especially with keri and sydnee. oh happy days. lol

4. Any TV show you are going to watch?

something on disney channel most likely.

5. Do you know what you will eat?

whatever crappy school food is in the caf.

 

 

something

October 15 2007

RED = ANGER

1. Are you currently mad at someone?
a bit, yes


2. Which of your family members has the worst temper?
prolly my mom...okay definitely my mom

3. Have you ever thrown something at anyone?
oh yes


4. Does your face turn red when you're angry?
well, my face is red all the time...so...sure

5. When you're mad do you prefer to stare angrily or yell?
both cuz i'm cool like that


ORANGE = EXCITEMENT
1. Has anyone ever thrown a surprise party for you?

uh duh no 

2. Are you easily excited?
yes i suppose so


3. What event is coming up that you're most excited about?
i'm not excited about too much right now...probably wednesday night...


4. If you won a million dollars, what would be your first thought?
i have no thoughts....NAW i'm just playin....prolly...OMG

5. If you could have anything right now what would it be?

oh everyone knows...who i want.  it's not who you think either.  unless you think the right person.  then that would be right.  :)

YELLOW = SELF DISCOVERY


1. Name:
Carmen

 

2. Birthday:
November 22 (Thanksgiving)

 

3. What's your main goal in life?

um...whatever God's main goal for my life is 

 

4. Do you want to have children?
idk...i guess so.  love children!

(when i'm married, duh)


5. How do you want to die?

i don't particularly think of such morbid things

GREEN = OPINIONS
 

1. Are you against gay marriage?
yes.  adam and eve not adam and steve

 

2. Lower the drinking age?
NO WAY JOSE


3. Capital Punishment?
it depends

 

4. Abortion?

is murder

*it's not a choice, it's a child*

5. Democrat or Republican?
both!

BLUE = LOVE


1. Do you love someone?
i think i do...i hope so.  if love is real, then yes i do.  (and again, it's not who you think unless you think the right person, then that would have to be correct.)


2. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?

boy...do i wish.

 

3. Is it better to have loved and lost than never loved at all?
i guess so either way...love sucks

 

4. Do you believe in love at first sight?
do i believe in love at all?

 

5. Would you tattoo your lover's name on your body?
um...no thanks 


PURPLE = Q&A


Q: How many beds did you lay in today?
like 1


Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
brown

Q: Name one thing that you do everyday?
breathe...mostly


Q: How much cash do you have on you right now?
i have none....:P


Q: Look to your left. what is there?
a piano and some other stuff


Q: What's the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?

a shirt...it's real cute too!
Q: What website(s) do you visit the most during the day?
 phusebox...and email

Q: Do you have plants in your room?
um...no i don't think.  maybe somewhere under all the stuff.  lol


Q: Does anything hurt on your body right now?
does my heart count...

Q: What city was your last taxi cab ride in?
i don't ride in taxis.  they frighten me.
Q: Do you own a picture phone?
yes, in fact, i do.

Q: Recent time you were really upset?
like now.  :(


PINK = LAST


1. Person you saw?
um...fajah


2. Person that said they loved you?
i don't know.  don't care.

OH ACTUALLY it would have been mrs. shawn, the pastor's wife

 

3. Movie watched in cinema?
um.............i think it was hairspray.  i could be mistaken.

 

4. Song you listened to?
um...dunno.

 

5. Person you talked on the phone with?
GRACE


GREY = TODAY


1. What are you doing right now?
this and breathing...sorta


2. What are you doing tonight?
mime.  i think.  not like i will really be there anyway 

 

3. What are you going to eat?
FOOD DUH

(gosh tyler why'd you have to steal my dang answer???)

 

4. Did you accomplish anything today?
i guess.  if you call...making it through the school day accomplishing something...then yes i did.

 

5. What shoes are you wearing?
my wond-ee-ful rocket dogs. 

 


BROWN = TOMORROW


1. Is?
um...tuesday.  one more day till wednesday!
2. My plans are?
piano and school...and hopefully talking to that one person

 

3. Are you going to laugh?
golly gee i hope so


4. Any TV show you watch coming on?
well...maybe some reruns of smallville or scrubs...but i don't watch tv all that much really

 

5. Do you know what you will eat?
food...again.

Sadness

October 15 2007

Guess what yall I had surgey on my birthday and it was so sad at least i thought it was and everybody kept thinking i wqas dead because  i didnt wake up on time but i woke up i just falling  back asleep so i wasnt dead! i just decided tell yall that

well ttyl

lastnight. . .

October 15 2007

well it rpetty much sucked. it was all normal until I went to bed.

the first hour was normal. i lied there without sleeping like i do every night, then i fell asleep. about 12 i woke up. idk i just felt. . . blah i guess. I didnt know what i was doing. SO i just started thinking about. . . . everything. my mind was just wandering. I closed my eyes again to try to fall asleep. so i lay there with my eyes closed. but all my muscles were tense. i was totally coherant. and that feeling was going through my body until about. . . . 3:45. then i fell asleep. just to wake up an hour later to get ready for school.

I hope i dont fall asleep during class 

Biggest Fear

October 15 2007

What's your biggest fear?

That this entire world is some cosmic joke being played on me to see if I would accept Kosmihumorism. Kosmihumorism is the belief that all existence in this universe is simply made up for the sake of fooling and confusing me (I am the only thing that exists here, of course) until I accept Kosmihumorism. The catch is that this world is designed to confuse me by pushing philosophies and religions which make hints to or distracts from Kosmihumorism. If I accept it, then I am free. But if I don't, then I have hope and am trapped in this maddening world.

 

Why have you hated the idea of an online relationship?
Personally, I know that people get hurt and are imperfect. We humans are not so resiliant so as to not feel torn or hated or unloved. It is our nature as emotional creatures to feel these very things, to be aware of our thoughts and pitfalls and other people. (barring the problem of other minds, of course) Knowing this, how might I communicate my love, my care, my patience, and my protection unless I am right there, face to face with her? Or if she is hurt, how might I hold her, or simply hug her? Those are impossibilities. All that can be given are words and thoughts. Mere expressions of feeling and delight, insight and empathy.

 

Certainly, I thought, these would not be enough. However, knowing what I have just stated, I found myself wanting to protect, to hold, and to just sit patiently with her. How maddening to have a mediator of a electronic phone! My hope and expectation is that I will see her soon, though not soon enough. I know that it is hard on me, and I bet it is hard on her. And that's what I get for being in an online relationship with a girl ... who means so much to me. Paradox.

la

October 14 2007

RED = ANGER

1. Are you currently mad at someone?
idk i dont think so lol


2. Which of your family members has the worst temper?
mi fadda

3. Have you ever thrown something at anyone?
yeah, when i was mad, and not


4. Does your face turn red when you're angry?
sometimes i guess

5. When you're mad do you prefer to stare angrily or yell?
YELLLL :)


ORANGE = EXCITEMENT
1. Has anyone ever thrown a surprise party for you?

uhh no 

2. Are you easily excited?
if its something woth getting exited about, i do


3. What event is coming up that you're most excited about?
nothing, well. . . i guess it would have to be me coming home


4. If you won a million dollars, what would be your first thought?
holy crap are you serious

5. If you could have anything right now what would it be?

youuu, lol no uh to live in TN again 

YELLOW = SELF DISCOVERY


1. Name:
James

 

2. Birthday:
March 24

 

3. What's your main goal in life?

not exactly sure but i want to live it to the fullest

 

4. Do you want to have children?
sure do :) when im Married


5. How do you want to die?

 i want to go easily, like my grandpa

GREEN = OPINIONS
 

1. Are you against gay marriage?
mhm, its so gay (lol)

 

2. Lower the drinking age?
No sir


3. Capital Punishment?
if it is deserved

 

4. Abortion?
40,000 kids are murdered every day ONLY in the United States, now tell me that is a good idea, punks

 

5. Democrat or Republican?
whoever should be appointed into office, the one that has the best ideas

BLUE = LOVE


1. Do you love someone?
I sure do


2. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?

lol idk if thats what you want to call it, BUT its easier to explain by saying yeah i have a girlfriend.  

 

3. Is it better to have loved and lost than never loved at all?
if i lost the one i loved then that would be devistating, like if they died or something, so idk

 

4. Do you believe in love at first sight?
Nahh, but once you get to know the person a little better

 

5. Would you tattoo your lover's name on your body?
ha no, but maybe a tatoo of something else is ok


PURPLE = Q&A


Q: How many beds did you lay in today?
El Numero Uno


Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
Plain white T

Q: Name one thing that you do everyday?
pray (dang grace lol)


Q: How much cash do you have on you right now?
that would be a positive 0


Q: Look to your left. what is there?
a living room or something like that, its where our TV is


Q: What's the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?
a Q: What website(s) do you visit the most during the day?
 myspace, email, phusebox

Q: Do you have plants in your room?
lol nope


Q: Does anything hurt on your body right now?
no not at the moment, but before the day is over im sure somethign will

Q: What city was your last taxi cab ride in?
never ridden in a Taxi

Q: Do you own a picture phone?
yeah

Q: Recent time you were really upset?
couple weeks ago


PINK = LAST


1. Person you saw?
mi madre


2. Person that said they loved you?
idk its been a while

 

3. Movie watched in cinema?
uhm Hot Rod (its gay)

 

4. Song you listened to?
Remember the name by Fort  Minor 

 

5. Person you talked on the phone with?
Christian


GREY = TODAY


1. What are you doing right now?
Listening to remember the name and doing this


2. What are you doing tonight?
nothing, worrying about school tomorrow

 

3. What are you going to eat?
food

 

4. Did you accomplish anything today?
 I dont think so

 

5. What shoes are you wearing?
uhm no shoes, i live in Hawaii cuz

 


BROWN = TOMORROW


1. Is?
a SUCK day


2. My plans are?
school and home work

 

3. Are you going to laugh?
idk maybe


4. Any TV show you watch coming on?
uh most nights i watch George Lopez lol

 

5. Do you know what you will eat?
junk at school

BORED :(

October 14 2007

RED = ANGER

1. Are you currently mad at someone?
Nope, not a one


2. Which of your family members has the worst temper?
Probably ... i'm not so sure ... we are kinda all the same when when it comes to tempers

3. Have you ever thrown something at anyone?
LoL, well yeah when i was j/king with someone. Never when i was mad


4. Does your face turn red when you're angry?
i'm not a thinkn so

5. When you're mad do you prefer to stare angrily or yell?
I would have to go with Stare Angerily


ORANGE = EXCITEMENT
1. Has anyone ever thrown a surprise party for you?
Sadly to say, nope

2. Are you easily excited?
:( nope, i'm easily made happy or i'm easily made laugh, but not easily excited :(


3. What event is coming up that you're most excited about?
Probably Turnk Or Treat (IF my mom lets me go that is)


4. If you won a million dollars, what would be your first thought?
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (lol)

5. If you could have anything right now what would it be?
For Tyler to come home sooner

YELLOW = SELF DISCOVERY


1. Name:
Grace

 

2. Birthday:
August 9th

 

3. What's your main goal in life?

I'm not sure quite yet. I guess thats something i will learn in time

 

4. Do you want to have children?
When i get married


5. How do you want to die?

How ever God wants me to i suppose. I would like it to be painless but hey how ever God says i'll go, then thats how i'll go

GREEN = OPINIONS
 

1. Are you against gay marriage?
Yep

 

2. Lower the drinking age?
No Way, its craZy as is, why change it for the worse


3. Capital Punishment?
..not sure..

 

4. Abortion?
Is from the devil

 

5. Democrat or Republican?
it depends

BLUE = LOVE


1. Do you love someone?
Yeah


2. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
i suppose you could say yes. But i'm not supposed to.

 

3. Is it better to have loved and lost than never loved at all?
i'm not so sure

 

4. Do you believe in love at first sight?
Nope

 

5. Would you tattoo your lover's name on your body?
ha no thank you


PURPLE = Q&A


Q: How many beds did you lay in today?
One


Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
a Green long-sleeve and then a white short-sleeve over it, that says
"Bonne Bell

>>>>>>

Looking Good All The Way

Etonic"

(i have no idea what it is advertising but its cute so.. :P )

Q: Name one thing that you do everyday?
Pray


Q: How much cash do you have on you right now?
$0.00


Q: Look to your left. what is there?
a red wall


Q: What's the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?
shorts

Q: What website(s) do you visit the most during the day?
 e-mail & phusebox

Q: Do you have plants in your room?
ha you make me laugh..... no


Q: Does anything hurt on your body right now?
Yes :( 

Q: What city was your last taxi cab ride in?
sadly to say, i have never been in a taxi

Q: Do you own a picture phone?
i wish

Q: Recent time you were really upset?
.. a while ago ..


PINK = LAST


1. Person you saw?
Seth and Scott


2. Person that said they loved you?
..i'm not sure..

 

3. Movie watched in cinema?
i am not so sure

 

4. Song you listened to?
ha how am i supposed to know

 

5. Person you talked on the phone with?
Carmen Pooch E.A


GREY = TODAY


1. What are you doing right now?
listening to an Odyssey and filling this out


2. What are you doing tonight?
eating ice cream (that Seth is supposed to bring me) and hopefully sleeping

 

3. What are you going to eat?
ha ice cream

 

4. Did you accomplish anything today?
yes

 

5. What shoes are you wearing?
shoes..lol i know i know i'm not wearing my fantastic boots, but hey i've got to do something new every once and a while to keep people guessing

:P

 


BROWN = TOMORROW


1. Is?
Monday


2. My plans are?
school and thats about it

 

3. Are you going to laugh?
I always laugh :) ha


4. Any TV show you watch coming on?
nope

 

5. Do you know what you will eat?
nope

"haha" NOT

October 14 2007

MOOD --- In Pain

Ok so yeah the whole tailbone thing might be funny to you people, but it isn't funny to me.

Like i said i was going to ride this weekend, well i did. And then i went to the movies and sat there for about 2 hours then all the way home in the car. You people might be laughing away, but its no laughing matter for me.

Ahhh

So yeah i would REALLY like for you guys to PLEASE pray for me.

i wrote this

October 14 2007

hey you kiddos this is a song i wrote a while back and recorded (by myself...definitely NOT professionally.  i used a tape...lol)  i really don't think it's that good, but people seemed to like it.  in fact, i was talking to one girl the other day (Jessica) and she actually remembered the words.  I'd say i wrote this around New Year's, judging by the lyrics.  lol (some of you might know...well maybe only one of you.)

===============================

Verse 1:I fell for the same old love traps

Time and time again

Each time I thought you’d fallen for me,

You turned your back and ran

From everything,

And all the lies

And all the things you told me

There’s a side of youI wish I’d never seen that day

Now…All I have to say…is 

Chorus:

I don’t know if I’m over you

But I sure don’t

Wanna be in love with you

Not anymore

I don’t know if you’re through with me

But if you are

Just wait and see

When you want me to come back,

I won’t be there,

Not anymore… 

Verse 2:

I don’t know why I 'loved' you

You were just a boy

I don’t know why I trusted you

My heart was just your toy

You used me and

You treated me

Like you were all that

Now I wish I’d run away

And never had turned back 

Chorus:

‘Cus I don’t know if I’m over you

But I sure don’t

Wanna be in love with you

Not anymore

I don’t know if you’re through with me

But if you are just wait and see

When you want me to come back,

I won’t be there,

Not anymore 

Bridge:The wasted time

The wasted tears

The wasted thought

The wasted years

Why’d you have to

Let our trust fall

The love I see

The heart in me

Longs for you

Although it’s true

I don’t know why you’d

Treat me like you did 

(repeat chorus)

===============================

haha when i played this for the 'writing club' i had to hide in the bathroom because people chased me down.  it was amazing.  lol.  actually, austin took the tape and somehow lucas got a hold of it or something and i was very mad because i didn't know where the song was that i thought was bad, but was actually good i think, and he didn't know either.  but i think we found it.  i'm still not sure where it is, though.  hmmmmmmm.  i wrote another song, that was better...it's in my notebook or something.  well there you go.

NOT ANYMORE

(this is not about anyone in particular.  it WAS...about a year ago and yes, i did get over them...and moved on to someone else i am NOT over...FYI)

i homesicked

October 13 2007

 so yeah....Camp was boring ,& im glad im home! i missed yall.

 anyways....

So pretty much i am trying to loose  6 lbs( thats not a BIG DEAL), dont give me the whole "oh your not fat thing." i know i am not fat,but i'd like not to have those six pounds.so how do you loose weight ? & i am not cutting down on my food supply i might change up some habits though, & im not throwing any of it up....

 

i'm back

October 13 2007

i'm back.  yippee.  i guess this was a lot of fun.  ok who am i kidding it was freakin awesome!!!!  i worked at the stables for like 3 days and rode horses like 40 gazillion times...i went to james madison's house (monticello) and i got to tye-dye a shirt and play fun ping pong and be artsy!!!!  (sorry, not a big deal for you-big deal for me.)  i have so many pictures i don't know when i'm going to find time to put them on here. 

===========================

also, i don't like what i see now that i'm back.  you people are very sad and depress-ed.  this does not make me smile, and personally i am a fan of smiling BIGTIME. 

===========================

i guess i also came home to something good, too.  (maybe not for you guys.  i guess it kinda sucks)  I got a letter from some college and they invited me to come live and study on the campus with other kids my age.  something about program for the exceptionally gifted (PEG) and how i'm not challenged enough or something.  i'm still not sure if i'm going to do it.  but see, the problem is that the college...is in Virginia.  so that means that i would live...in Virginia.  which is kinda bittersweet.  okay REALLY bittersweet.  i don't like this at all.  I really would like to take this opportunity and make the best of it, but i don't want to leave my house...or my friends or my county or my family or anything in Tennessee or really anything that i know!  ugh.  so much for a break to RELAX.

LUV YOU GUYS MORE THAN YA THINK

Changed my Degree/Major

October 13 2007

Sorta.

 

I switched from a B.of Science in Psychology, to a B.S. in Psychology and Philosophy double-major.

 

Now I am going for a B.of Arts in Psychology, minor in Philosophy. I'ma take more german and math classes on top of psych and philosophy, because I like them and they help finish off my BA requirements.

 

Unofficial schedule for the Spring, 2008

 

PHL 320Theory of KnowledgeM W02:00-03:15PMAnspach 154Smith, JoshuaMTH 107 College AlgebraM W03:30-04:45PMPearce 203 StaffPSY 450Clinical PsychologyTu Th 12:30-01:45PMRowe 205Ronan, GeorgePHL 340Intermediate LogicTu Th 02:00-03:15PMAnspach 259 Meixner, JohnPSY 383Learning and MemoryTu Th 03:30-04:45PMAnspach 257 Eagle, Andrew

New Beginnings

October 13 2007

This post is for new beginnings in life and how amazing they can be. Last night was beyond words and I don't think God could have ever surprised me more by the gift He gave me. Only He knows what my future holds and I am perfectly okay with taking them one night at a time.....

 

Oh how I love this....

 

:-)

yeah...

October 13 2007

 so i've come to the conclusion that no one actually reads this.. and im ok with that... cause its pretty much just my place to rant/talk about my day...

 

well tonight has been a true blast.. i've been hanging out with my friend todd from work... who is an absolute BLAST! its been intense... in a good way of course!!!

 

but yeah.. life seems to be going pretty good.. well except for school of course....

 

i've been worrying about my dad a lot recently... he keeps calling me randomly out of the blue just to talk... and it just really worries me... i mean ever since his brother died.. i have just been worrying about him.. cause he just seems.. well different... i dunno what to think about it.... i mean i know he's "ok" but really i dunno it just scares me.. i hope he really is ok.. and that hes just not putting up a front or anything.. i really just wish i could see him.. cause if anything ever happened to him i honestly dont know what i would do... i would be completely devistated...

 

i dunno..

 

im going to bed now cause well its almost 3 and i have to be at work at 10 and i CANT be late... hahaha

 

 

so its bed time!

have a great night to anyone that reads this!

 

<em> 

fortune cookie

October 12 2007

:)

October 12 2007

MOOD: Tired

Ok so i'm just here to ask you fantastic friends of mine to please be praying for me. About a week ago i hurt my tailbone. And i went riding for about 3 hours yesterday and so this morning i could hardly walk. I'm not all that sure why...but then i sat in hard sets and then in a car for most of the day today. AND I am dieing of pain, pretty much.

I can handle pain, but when you cant sit down its a little hard to handle it! SO yeah please pray that God will take this pain away! B/c i'm gona ride my horses HOPEFULLY this weekend and i would rather not die of pain while doing so.

Thanks

Man.

October 12 2007
I was not always the best man, or boy. I have not always been what I should be. The basic instincts that I was taught were not the best. I am sorry that I can not be perfect for you. I ask for your forgiveness. I pray that you accept. Maybe one day I can change what was done. There is nothing I would change about my past only things I would change now. I have learned a lot of what I should not be and where that can take me. I have danced on the line for too long for me to not be a good dancer. My two left feet are making me stumble now, it is you that can save me and hold me up. Only if you choose to.

Well. . .

October 11 2007

I finally get what i have been wanting for a while. . . well im not moving bacj to Tennessee. BUT I think i am getting braces. 

yeah most people dont want them but i REALLY do want them. IDK why but i do. I think they are SUPERCOOL lol and my teeth need to be straight. We arent positive im getting them but i probably will. Some of you think well its only probably so yeah. BUT its the same "probably" that i got from my mom when i found out i was moving.

so i think i am getting braces.  

It's Never Too Early, Right?

October 11 2007

Garrett and I were talking on the phone just a little over an hour ago when he told me that the spring classes were now avalaible online. So once we hung up, I went to check it out. And I have to say, thus far I am mostly pleased (though I am upset with my favorite psych professor ever only teaching the one class I've already had him for - BOO!). 

 

So yes, I do in fact already have my schedule planned out, permitting that I don't change my mind between now and then... or that MTSU does not change their mind... And one or the other will most likely happen...

 

Consumer Behavior (Marketing), MWF 9:10 - 10:05

Promotion (Marketing), MWF 10:20 - 11:05

Honors Mass Media Law (EMC), MW 2:20 - 3:45

Persuasion (Psychology), TR 11:20 - 12:45

Play Writing (English), TR 2:40 - 4:05

 

That's right, at the end of the semester I will be familiar with law, know how to manipulate (uh... I mean persuade) people, and have written plays. Sounds like fun! Well, except the law part...  

Songs

October 11 2007
If your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be? So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, etc).
2. Put it on shuffle.
3. Press Play.
4. For every question, type the song that's playing.
5. When you go to a new question, press the Next button.
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool.
7. Don't skip songs.

---Eh, sometimes repeat artists come up.... skip it or keep it. . .whatever

Opening Credits
Learn to Fly-Foo Fighters

Waking Up
My Goodies-whoever sings that (lol)

First Day at School

Your All I Have-Snow Patrol

Breaking up

LOL 

I Am A Man Of Constant Sorrow- Soggy Bottom Boys 

Happiness
I'm Not Alright-Sanctus Real

Life's Okay
lol

She Thinks My Tractors Sexy-Kenney Cheseny 

Mental Breakdown
Skin-Rascal Flatts

Driving

History Maker-Delerious

Flashback
Kriptonite-3 Doors Down

Getting Back Together
ha   While My Guitar Gently Weeps-Jeff Healy Band

Wedding
Smooth-Santana and Rob Thomas


Birth of a Child
ha ha this sucks

In The End-Linkin Park 

 

Final Battle
(pretty cool) Fireproof-Pillar


Death Scene
Way Down South-Josh Turner

Funeral Song
HA HA    I Play Chicken With The Train-Cowboy Troy

So Long
Alcoho-Brad Paisley

LOL i was really bored sorry guys 

Jonas

October 11 2007

Alright i ahve a confession.

The Jonas Brothers, well at first i was like oh some gay boy band that hit it big because of Disney.

BUT i was rudly awakened. I actually listened to one of their songs and i was like wow they are pretty dang good. 

yeah this is a thought about nothing, but i havent posted anything a while so there

7 months!

October 11 2007
I am getting married in 7 months!

This may seem like a long time for some of you, but I've been engaged since January... 9 months to be exact, so 7 months to go is GREAT!
By the time I graduate I will be down to 5 months... AHHH!!!

Homecoming..!

October 10 2007

Well the first week we come back from our two week break. its gonna be homecoming for Creekwood.. yeah its gonna be cool! our theme (sophomores) is Shrek.... lol its gonna be great our float is unblieveable... your just gonna have to come out on friday and see it..! also i get ot escourt someone down the football field.. thats gonna be fun i did it last year and this year too! i have to go get my suit thing... homecoming is the 18th soo make plans to come.! im about to go get my haircut sooo i got to go... see ya...

               CREEKWOOD REDHAWKS!

They said it couldn't be done...

October 10 2007

I found this on youtube last night, and it's pretty amazing.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6_upMaelLE

 

Theres another one that I may or may not post later. 

.Blah.

October 09 2007


MOOD: Over Tired

Hey my peoples, hope your having a FANASTIC day.
The past few days have been....

long/craZy/eye opening/happy/sad/

pretty much everything in one. Yeah i cant write it all down, but it was a few days i wont forget.

Hope you guys have been ... living life to the fullest. 
suppose i'll talk to you peoples some time

Bye

Darn

October 08 2007

I love meeting new people and making new friends. it's great.

 

well i came in to the library just now and i sat down at the computer and the guy next to me was like hey patrick. but i had no idea who he was. i just got done spilling my brains on an all essay ethics midterm. but even then. i didnt even recoginze this guy. usually when this happens i just play it off, but i wasnt on my game today. lol. kinda sucks. i didnt want to make him feel like a... crazy guy. i dont know. i just hate it when it happens.

 

well, one midterm down, two left. poli sci today and physics tomorow. physics, i dont even know. lol.

 

piece

Let's Be Real

October 07 2007

We're not real with one another. We want everyone to think we're doing ok when we're not. We hide behind facades and masks and cleverly disguise ourselves as having it all together... but it's just not the case. And that's not ok. And it's especially not ok to feel like you have to hide yourself from everyone, especially your friends or brothers and sisters in Christ.

 

But the fact of the matter is we do.

 

And you know what? Honestly, I like myself. I like my personality. I think I look decent most days. I think I'm a nice person. I'm not perfect, but I think I'm alright. But many times what drags me down is worrying what YOU think about me. When you flake me off I wonder if you care. When you totally ignore me in group settings, even though I know we're some sort of friends because we've had some good conversations one on one, it hurts me. And it makes me wonder what's wrong with me. But there isn't anything wrong with me. I'm the way God made me and I don't have to conform to the cookie cutter image the world throws at me.

 

I struggle with worry and anxiety. I don't pray enough, and when I pray I fee like I almost forget I'm my praying to my Lord and Savior! It almost feels like talking to some mysterious creature in the cosmos. I've lost that awe I once had of Him. I freak out if I feel like something I'm doing is short of perfect. I fear it will fall to pieces and will be a failure, and I fear failure more than anything else. Sometimes I'm afraid to hear God tell me what His will for my life may be. I'm prideful. I'm so selfish. 

 

I know that everyone who is reading this right now has played fake multiple times. You probably wore a mask today. Are you thrusting yourself into a certain crowd to hide your insecurities? Do you dress a certain way because you feel guys won't love you otherwise? Seriously... what do you have to hide? We've all been there. BE REAL. We are a community. If we can't be real with one another... who can we be real with?

 

I tell you what (AO people), I'm sure I missed some awesomeness at the fall retreat. But those of you who were there, y'all missed some awesomeness  in Sunday school this morning. I was sleepy and slightly freaked out by Mike Bivens' energy, but what he said this morning really hit at home... we have to be open with our brothers and sisters in Christ. We have to stop playing this game. We can't keep saying we're ok when we're not. It's time to end this. 

 

It's funny... earlier today I went back to look at my old Xanga entries from high school... oh man... it was kind of painful... things that I thought were so huge then are now laughable. And one day I'll feel that same way about the stuff that concerns me now. Let's face it guys, life is short and we have too little time to waste so much energy on petty problems, people's opinions of us, and all around stupid stuff. What if we took the shift off ourselves and stopped being so petty, and displayed it outwardly to others? What a difference it would make if we truly love one another as God so intended it to be... 

 

Let's stop having occassional moments when we "do" something real, because that's so temporary and superficial. Let's BE real, a state of being, a lifestyle of authenticity and openness.

 

Let's be real.  

GOT IT!!!

October 07 2007

I got my bike yesterday! It is a 2004 Honda Shadow Sabre with a 1100cc engine. IT IS GORGEOUS! I can't wait to get it out on the backroads :-)


pretty cool stuff

October 06 2007

Te amo, usted es mi muchacha hermosa del bebé.

 

Si tuviera un dólar para cada vez realicé te quiero para quién usted es yo sería rico

 

 usted es la muchacha de mis sueños

 

this looks kinda cool 

fried

October 06 2007
So I had a pretty...hot day today. We went to my sister's cheerleading competition. It was extremely hot, and now I'm liked red from being out in the sun today. It really stinks watching everybody else having fun doing their routines, and I can't be out there anymore cause I'm too old. I'm thinking about doing competitive cheerleading. My sister didn't place, but they still did really good. Our majors placed fourth. So all in all it was a pretty good day.

Wake Up Call

October 06 2007

Fall break, yeah... no. Alabama was fun, but practice today was crazy madness. I'll be happy when it's over.

 

I'm thinking about trying out for Seussical in November, but I don't really know if I'll have time for it. 

 

 

Norse Axes and Harvest Lattes

October 06 2007

I am now nineteen. Chris took me out to this awesome park and we ate Chinese food, then went to coffee and talked about Medieval warfare and theology for hours. I'll put up pictures if anyone wants to see.

 

Other news in the life of Stacy... Classes are slowly crushing me. I am actually looking forward to mid-terms.

My health is sort of getting worse. I have more bad days than good days. I might do something about it. If I ever have the time...

 

I am having a birthday party tonight, so that should be really fun. We are going to watch a foreign film and play games and drink pina coladas. I am probably going to wear my Nigerian shirt. Yep.

 

Anything else you guys want to know? 

dang-flab-it

October 06 2007

bye i'm going to virginia!!!  see you...kiddos later.

bye dang it

fun day

October 05 2007

so today i hung out with my friend Deven and Chandler and a kid named Jacob and my brother...and Deven and Chandler's mom!  We had SO much fun.  i'm pretty tired and now i'm waiting on Neely to get to my house.  i don't know when she's gonna be here...hmm.  i just found out some WONDERFUL news.  YAY ME!!!  i'm so dang excited.  i'm gonna go...do something.  or something.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!  (that's me screaming because of my good news.)    

so i hope you guys and gals had a hey-ho-wonderful-o day, i know i did!!!! 

so i gotta go now.  well not really but i'm gonna go breathe or something.  bye love you people

So...

October 05 2007
I really like this song. It is great. Elizabeth is not allowed to comment.

the word hot

October 05 2007
My brother and I were just having a talk about the word "Hot".  I told him to always call a girl beautiful, never hot.  He said, "WHY??  what if they are?".  I told him that hot is a pretty degrading word to girls and they would much rather be called beautiful.  It makes them feel important.  Instead of just some other girl...yeah.  He still disagrees with me.  WHAT do y'all think?

Servant

October 05 2007
Today i went to a homeless shelter. It was a pretty good experiance. I learned that a lot of people have it worse than me. There were soo many homeless people there. It was fun getting to serve them food and offer all i could to them. The thing is, they knew that i had more than they did, but they still treated my like nice. They talked to me by name and didnt treat me like i was better than them though. The place is called River of Life. Its a mission that offers 3 meals a day and 3 church services a week + a mens and womens bible study every day.  About 150 homeless people were there tonight and that was a "small" night. A lot of the people there need prayers and i was wondering if that would be cool with you peolple to pray for them. Thank you

Because of Austin....

October 04 2007

Yes, Austin you are a inspiration for this post. : )

 

The question of what a good reason for breaking up would be. Here it goes. 

 

Is saying that you don't love that person anymore a reason to break up?

 I don't think so. Love isn't just a feeling but an action. Love is sacrificing and not always having things going in easy but sticking with it anyway. How can you honestly say that you don't love someone when you have been telling them that you did for so long? You can't. Unless, you didn't really love them in the first place. Oh yeah, you most likely were attracted to that person but you got tired of them and so you somehow think that is a valid reason for turning around and being a jerk (yes, I said jerk) to them. Somehow, their beautiy or handsomeness starts fading and you don't think that they are attractive or they aren't a challenge anymore. You don't have to try to get them to go out with you anymore and you find someone else who is is a challenge. Some else who will play the game with you. And yes, it is a game. ( I have a feeling this isn't going to make people happy) 

 

 The other question, Is saying that you don't like someone a reason to break up with someone?

 No, because you shouldn't have ever gotten into a relationship with them in the first place!!! What are you basing your relationship on? Are you basing it on how they look or what their personality? If you are, your stupid (yes, I mean that too). You should be looking at their character and their beliefs. And if you got into the relationship without first looking at these things, then you are abviously to immature to be in a relationship. If you don't like someone after a couple of months then why in the world would tell them that you loved them? Because, in all of these kind of relationships you do say that you love that person. 

 

 Well, I need to go so it's not really wrapped up all that much, but this will have to do.

 

hmmm

October 04 2007
If you don't have a life, what's the point in life? I guess so people can look at you and ,"Hey that girl has no life and she's boring." Then they feel better about themselves.

the problem

October 04 2007

i think i know what the problem with my roommates is, other than they just need to lighten up, and grow up.

 

they dont know good common sense when it hits them in the face. i guess that sounds bad. but it's getting on my nerves. lol

 

piece

ugh

October 04 2007

i just want to say i would sacrifice a guy for one of my friends any day.  well this friend, at least!  :)

but forgive me if i slip up.  thanks!  i promise i am going to try

really hard.

Correction

October 04 2007

CORRECTION ON MY LAST "THOUGHT" ABOUT THE TICKET. . . . IM LEAVING HERE THE 19TH AT LIKE 10:00 AT NIGHT

SO YEAH IT WILL BE LIKE 3 IN THE MORNING YOUR TIME. :)  

europe dance

October 04 2007

Yeah. So I'm going to Europe! I completed my application today! I'm so excited. We're going to London, England; Surrey, England; Warwick, England; Oxford, England; Caen, France; Paris, France; Versailles, France; Brussels, Belgium; and Amsterdam, Holland. We get to see Big Ben, the Eiffel Tower, the Lodon Tower, Warwick Castle, the London Eye (the biggest farris wheel so as of now), and walk through the house Anne Frank stayed in (which is what I really want to do.) I feel a little bad though because my mom, dad, and sister gave up their cruise so I wouldn't have to raise as much money. I totally appreciate it, but still I can't help feeling like they are getting jipped. I'm just so excited.

___

October 04 2007

FORGET THIS..

 

Bye (English)

Adiós (Spanish)

Au revoir (French)

Tschüs (German)

Ciao (Italian)

Tot ziens (Dutch)

Tchau (Portuguese)

Пока (Russian)

再见。(Chinese)

付け足し〔不戦勝者〕(Japanese)

 

BlahGrr

October 04 2007

Yeah i was happy a minute ago but Math can change your life...now i'm peeved and tired. I JUST finished school, ha Carmen pooch E.A it was fun hanging out with you and your "friend" but i should have come home to do my school :( O well i learned from my mistake.

Grrness  i have no one to talk to but thats life.. which happens to be sucking at the moment!
well i'm going to go do something random and try to laugh at my self.

RANDOM

October 04 2007

I'M GOING TO MEXICO TO EAT ICECRAM! YAAA ME

The Kid

October 04 2007

Alright, I gave the pastors kid a chance. I dont

 

like him. I have given him a fair chance. I

 

talked to him. It is going to be fun meeting him

 

in person. He is not my kinda person, maybe

 

because he acts like me idk. But you people

 

told me to give him a chance, so i did. Sorry if I

 

dissapointed you people but, I dont like him lol.

 

I think he is a LOSER for more than one reason

 

BUT most of all he tried to pick on me when I

 

am older than him by more than one year and

 

he thinks I am weaker than him . . .lol. idk but i

 

tried and i dont like him :) sorry

 

goat!

October 04 2007

i love you my goat!

 my goat i will keep on my boat.

you will be small, and clingy,

and not tall, and dingy.

you will be black & white,

and will go to sleep by my feet at night.

you will be my little baby,

maybe, just maybe.

we will love to play ,

&

this poem is gay.

 

But my goat  wont be.

..... p>

 

never a dull moment...

October 04 2007

if things werent complicated in my life enough....

 

my friend Gin called me... which if you have read this at all or knew anything about me... she is the one that was supposed to move up to K-ville with me and live in an apartment but then didnt.... so yeah i havent talked to her since july.... and i was feeling extra crappy this week so i sent her an e-mail not expecting a response... but she called me... i talked to her for a few minutes but i was extremely busy so i had to end the convo early but i told her i would call her back.. and i havent yet cause i've still been super busy....

 

but yeah that was pretty crazy....

 

today is going to be an actually calmer day compared to the rest of my week... i dont have a test or quiz but i do have to go to work in like 30 min. so that'll be fun..haha

 

well i think thats it for now....

 

till next time,

emily 

Untitled

October 03 2007

I got my ticket for coming home. Im coming the 20th of December. Thank you for your prayers (if you prayed) it means a lot to me :)  Its gonna be a long flight on the way back to Hawaii like 18 hours or something like that. I got a layover in Las Vegas
 

The Spirits's Lights

October 03 2007

Some times the hardest thing and the right thing are the same. 

Which would you choose to do, the right thing, or the thing you enjoy?

What if the right thing is just a way to prove a point? What if you have to choose the point or the thing you enjoy so much?

What do you do?  

goodbye...

October 03 2007

Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind
Images
You sang me Spanish lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes
Clever trick

Well, I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

[Chorus]
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me
Images
And when you left, you kissed my lips
You told me you would never, never forget
These images

No

Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

[Chorus]
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine

Did I make it that
Easy to walk right in and out
Of my life?

[Chorus]
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should have known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

Prayer for Jarred

October 03 2007

Hey everyone,

 We just got a called from Jarred ( which isn't suppose to happen unless something is wrong) and he said that he is on his way to the hospital. Apparently, he got bit by a spider last Thursday and is just now going to the hospital. It's starting to turn black which isn't a good thing. So, for all of you could keep him your prayers that would be super-de-duper!!! Thanks! 

Untitled

October 03 2007

Well. i got my haircut .... not sure if i like it ,i mean i do , but then i dont . i ll prolly get some pics on here later!

yeah , so lifes pretty ok right now. :)

 

How? or maybe Why?

October 03 2007
What would be considered grounds for breaking up with someone? If you are in a steady relationship for say a year, how do you just break up with someone after that? You can't say oh I just don't love them anymore. If that is true then did you ever love them? I don't think that you can just say I just don't like them anymore. It doesn't make sense, especially after a year. I would think that after 3 months at most you would find that out. Now notice this has nothing to do with anyone or anything. I was just thinking about people who dated a little over 2 years and broke up. Yes I know I said it wasn't about anyone, well because it is not, it is inspired by them. I just don't quite understand why that would happen, knowing that neither cheated. Why if two people loved each other would they let an argument do that to them? If it was an argument. So what do you guys think?

Back

October 02 2007

Made it back safely from cali... I will say that one should never sainly plan to drive across the country in two days because it sucks. We made good time though, we ended up leaving Thursday night at nine and arrived Saturday evening at nine thirty. We were only there for Sunday when we unloaded the truck and then went down to the San Francisco Bay to eat then we left Monday morning at 5am and arrived back in TN at 3pm. Now I can't wait to go and get a motorcycle! I am planning on getting a Honda Shadow Sabre... I will post pics when I get it.

 

Easy as 1, 2, 3

October 02 2007

1.) I think my computer is ok.

 

2.) I think we need to stop letting the Chinese paint our Barbie dolls with lead paint. Get people off welfare and off the streets and employ them to paint the Barbie dolls! 

 

3.) I really want to go to Europe... like really badly... all over Europe. I'm getting jealous of all my friends and all thei cool picture from Europe.  

FooseBall Game

October 02 2007

MOOD: Happy


So tonight I went to a foose-ball game ( lol inside j/k )

Anyways, I went to one of Supermans (aka Austins) football games. It was pretty fun, lol Carmen and I had a lot of fun taking random pictures and laughing. Ha we have a lot of new inside j/k’s b/c of that fantastically fun game. Well tonight was fun and I suppose I’ll speak with you people later.

~Ace~

football

October 02 2007

well tonight i went to the football game (the freshman barbies) with my right hand gurl and partner in crime, grace, and watched some guys push each other down.  it was VERY entertaining.  i laughed my head off...lol!  AND i deleted all my pictures on my memory card by accident.  i thought i was gonna scream!  but then i took some cool ones and i was ok.  thankfully, most of the important ones were already on the computer!!!!  it was really cool that my buddy got to go..yay!  i really want to see that movie Enchanted...it looks pretty cute and funny.  PLUS it comes out the day before my birthday.  but i won't be doing anything on my birthday except stuffing my face and visiting family because it's Thanksgiving!!!  so yeah, i guess that's about all.

~Pooch-E.A.~

Thoughts

October 02 2007

 Wow, shows you how great my fall break is. I just read All of my thoughts. Ha it took me like 30 min lol. I have no life, well i would but i odnt have any friends to hang out with so well. . . i guess i dont have a life.




 

*~* #!# $%$ (-)

October 01 2007

mood: _Blank_

So today was pretty much horrible....but i'm going to put on a happy face.

I was thinking (i know i know everytime i think something bad happens) but i was just thinking about how Life is a gift. And we all know this and have heard it a hundred times, but have we thought about what we were going to do with the gift? Not like what do you want to be when you grow up kinda thing but every day we wake up are we going to use this gift to the fullest or just play around with it and not really use it the best we can. I know this is freakishly random and your probably wondering why i am even writing about this. Its more for my sake then yours i suppose.... if i write my thoughts down then i get it better... i know i'm weird just go with it. ANYWAY, today was pretty much horrible, and i think it was my fault for letting it be that way. Maybe not my *fault* per say but.... my decision to live that way. I could have at any point in time said "No, today i'm living for God and i'm going to laugh my way through this day instead of waiting for the moment i can go to bed so i get this day over with" but i didn't..and the sad thing is i will never live this day again, i lost my chance to live this day to the fullest, i'll never get that time back (well inless they make some amaZing time thingy and i can go back in time and relive it...but i dont think thats gona happen anytime soon)

Yeah so sorry this was so boring.... but i felt like typing and so i did. Thanks for reading about my boring thoughts that randomly pop in my head.

 

~Ace~ 

 

Happy Birthday to me!

October 01 2007
 well i turned 16 yesterday!! yeah im soo cool!

memory

October 01 2007

I don't wanna see you or feel you,

I don't wanna look into your eyes,

I don't wanna touch you or miss you,

I just wanna love your memory tonight.

I can't handle all this pain

All we ever do is fight anyway.

Why we even tried, I haven't a clue.

With hearts involved, there's way too much to lose.

I don't wanna see you or feel you,

I don't wanna look into your eyes,

I don't wanna touch you or miss you,

I just wanna love your memory tonight.

You were something else to look at,

Your intentions, they weren't all bad.

You tried to make me something I wasn't,

Lord knows there ain't no future in all that.

I don't wanna see you or feel you,

I don't wanna look into your eyes,

I don't wanna touch you or miss you,

I just wanna love your memory tonight...

Crazy stuff

September 30 2007

Today at church it was kinda boring but the service was pretty good they talked about complaining. but afterwards i had to watch kids while there was a meeting. It was all fun and stuff, i was playing soccer and there was this kid and he was carrying around this peice of wood. I told him to stop because he was going to get hurt but he didnt listen. so ANYWAY i kept playing soccer and i kicked it, it ended up hittting the wood and then hitting him in the mouth. Turned out i chipped his front tooth, like half of it. so it looked pretty bad lol. But at least it didnt hurt him. he didnt cry or anything but now he looks pretty bad ha ha ha.

so that was my day so far.  

lol

September 30 2007
lol fun times

stuck...

September 30 2007

mmk... so this situation NEVER happens to me....

 

i seriously feel like im stuck between a rock and a hard place... and whats killing me even more is that its still all uncertain... thats one thing i hate more than anything.. uncertainty...

 

 i hate feeling like im leading someone on... like really thats the worst feeling in the world... but i just dont know what to do... 

 

i dont think i can choose at this point...

 

this is going to take some intense thinking... and hope when all i have is doubt....

 

to the nights of uneasy thinking...

and the days of worry hearts...

 

<emily> 

haha

September 30 2007
lol...ok so lilly and i had this great idea to do this..haha it was a lot of fun! So yeah here it is..there are a few of us doing this fantastic dance so here they are

Untitled

September 30 2007

"Don't  you fucking    know what you are?"   no, i don't.  a little enlightenment would be quite helpful. 

I'm Not on Speaking Terms With an Inanimate Object...

September 30 2007
This may sound shallow, but for those of you who have paid over two thousand dollars for something that is supposed to last a while you may understand... Feel free to pray that my iMac doesn't die. It's been acting funny today and it's only a year old. I'm glad I have the extended warranty in case something does happen, but I most certainly prefer there not be. I've restarted it twice and it's still a little off. Thankfully it's letting me back up some files to my external hard drive, something I should have done long ago... Who knows, maybe it will be all better tomorrow...

freshman honors choir

September 30 2007

okay so on saturday i auditioned for the freshman honors choir.  I MADE IT!!!  i was one of 4 freshman (from my school, that is) that made it...and the only alto.  I'm pretty excited!!!  but i'm really ticked and annoyed right now (for more reasons than one) but mainly because i can't find my stupid binder that has my Bible studies in it that i have to have for tomorrow.  it really stinks.  Well i guess if God really wants me to do the study, i'll find it.  but i made choir (some of you people better come or else.) lol      but it would be real cool-like if ya'll could go.  BUT ANYWAY...i guess that's all.

-sparky

Prayer Request

September 30 2007

 Today i had to say goodbye AGAIN this time to TK and Yurie. Its their last day tomorrow and im not gonna get to see them again before they leave. dang i hate saying godbye. Why do I have to say it SOOO much in the past 3 months. 

 

 Please everyone pray that we can find a really cheap ticket to Tennessee. If we cant then i cant come home. :( For the people on the mime team, you know how much it was to come here in march

like $800. well it needs to be cheaper than that. I want to come home sooo bad. Its gonna suck if i cant come. 

.HI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

September 29 2007

MOOD:  RANDOM

So yeah today i went shopping, Grrrness. I'm pretty

much like the only girl in my family that hates shopping. But i got this really cute skirt....i love it :) the 1 thing i like about shopping is the after fact were i get the cute new clothes :) ;)
Then i had a REALLY bad headache so i watched my favorite movie of all times, Pride and Prejudice. Oh yeah..but i still to this very moment have a REALLY bad headache Grrrness.

I feel random at the moment.... like i have been thinking really random things. Ha its kinda fun..its like a good clean kinda high :) hahahaha Well anyway, i felt like saying Whats Up My Peoples! So there i said it and now i can end this Incredibly random and boring thought! Oh yes!
Have a nice day

Forrest

September 29 2007

"Ya Know its funny when a man recalects. Cause' I dont remember being born, I dont recal what i got for my first Christmas and i dont remember when i went on my first outdoor picnic but, i do remeber  the first time i heard the sweetest  voice in wide world. I had never seen anything so beautiful in my life, she was like an angel."

 

hm i really like this :) 

Untitled

September 29 2007
25 things that hold some significance to me! 1- God – Because hes there, he loves me , saved me , and forgave me) 2- The Bible (because its God word) 3- My mom (for many reasons , but she is always there ) 4- My dad ‘’ 5- My sister Courtney( bc she gets me out of sticky situations, and there for me to tlk to her) 6- The rest of my family ( bc I just love them) 7- My Real friends ( bc they are always there for me, and teach me) 8- My best friend Erin ( for so many reasons , but basically she understands me completely) 9- My other best friend Angela ( many many reasons) 10- my bf Austin ( lots of reasons , but one thing that significant to me is the way he sees things, and the way he makes me think) 11- My MIME team( Because they make who I a & keep me stronger in my Faith) 12- My veggie tales purse ( bc angela gave it to me , & I love veggie tales) 13- My pictures ( bc their memories) 14- Trident(citrus) gum ( for many reasons) 15- My Mime journal ( bc it reminds me of the things ive grown in) 16- My box w. a lock on it (bet u didn’t know I had one of those… it reminds me of my strongest weaknesses;) 17- The key to the box ( bc it opens the box) 18- My sisters ipod (lol) ( because contains my favorite song) 19- My cds ( bc they are the things I dance to) 20- My smiley face pillow ( bc tamara gave it to me , & I swear theres a thousand tear drops consumed in it) 21- My blue cup , bc it reminds me of middle school , and ms, Yates ) 22- My overalls (bc they make me feel like a little kid) 23- My myspace, bc its were ive had some great conversations 24- My pear necklace ( bc it makes me feel Girly) My Jarred (because he helped me with life , and we could always tlk)

Volleyball

September 29 2007

tonight i went to some awesome volley ball game. gosh it was fun

me and my friends were screaming our heads off for our HBA girls volleyball teams. Ha we won both games. it was pumped the whole time.

 

HBA PRIDE

I wish i could have been at the cougars home coming but it was kinda hard since im like thousands of miles away :( 

When Happily Ever After Fails

September 28 2007

What do you do when the fairy tale
doesn’t turn out quite how you hoped?
How do you deal with an ending
that just isn’t what you planned?

 

How do you fix the mistakes you made
in learning how to love?
What happens when the things you know
aren’t exactly what they seemed?

 

What do you do when happily ever after fails
When your knight in shining armor is late?
Can you save yourself in the end
or will you be a victim of fate?

 

Does it mean that everything is fake
that nothing is even real?
Does it mean you can’t believe in
fairy tales and promises?

 

What if the rose wilts and fades?
What if the shoe doesn’t fit at all?
What if his kiss doesn’t make you wake?
What if your prince only falls?

 

What do you do when happily ever after fails
When your knight in shining armor is late?
Can you save yourself in the end
or will you be a victim of fate?

 

Maybe you don’t need him
or his kiss and his blade.
Maybe you don’t need that shoe
maybe you can just escape.

 

Fairy tales and promises

aren’t all there is to life.
Truth and hope bring victory
and they can save your life.

homecoming...woo

September 28 2007

Today has been pretty crazy, considering it was homecoming and all. But it was a lot of fun. The pep rally was really awesome, except the freshmen really stinked. We so need to do better next year. The football game was a lot of fun. I got to walk around with my friends. Except my feet starting hurting. And I met one of Carmen's good friends. Which is cool. Oh yeah! I was on the news tonight for like two seconds from the game. So I should probably go so I'll talk to you guys later.

Go to fullsize image

FOOTBALL

September 28 2007

i went to the game with Carmen Pooch E.A!
It was a lot of fun. Although i didn't get to see the whole game and preceded to walk back and forth....it was still a lot of fun.

I was kinda sad though :( i'll just sum it all up in saying "i miss tyler" yeah that pretty much sums it up in a nutshell!

WELL....
I am so so so tired so i think i shall go to sleep now.

Untitled

September 28 2007

my throat is tight

i can't swallow

all of my emotions seem to have collected in the pit of my stomach and they seem to swell with each tear i hold back 

 

i don't want to cry,

but i don't want to hurt either

yet i can't seem to prevent either 

 

i feel my heartbeat throughout every part of my body 

i don't want to think because i don't like my thoughts

anger, hurt, dissappointment

fear floods in bringing with it even worse

those things unnamed by the heart because i don't want to admit    

    they are there 

 

 

if little things are impossible, then what of the big things?

what does this mean?

why do i hurt? 

 

is being numb better than feeling pain? 

hidden

September 28 2007

okay i don't know about you but i think

lying and keeping something from someone are the same exact thing.  either way you put it, you're not telling the truth and you're covering something up.  so...when you lie to me or keep something from me, you don't gain my trust back for a long time and i hope you know that it freakin hurts me to know that some people would do this more than once.  i guess it was sorta silly to come back and trust them completely so soon.

======================

"Fairy tales always have happy endings."  she said.  "It depends."  She asked, "What do you mean?" 

"On whether you are Rumplestiltskin or the Queen..."

-Becca and Stan: Briar Rose

i'm the queen and i hate it.

Down with the ASG

September 28 2007
Lately, I have realized that the ASG and the people in it are not all that they say they are.  The Honors Program advertises that it has a "supportive community", when in fact it is a complete lie.  The reality of it all is that everyone is a conniving little rat trying to make it to the top.  Most everyone is concerned about padding their resumes and sucking up to all of those in charge.  It is ridiculous.  Not to say that I don't enjoy a little power every now and then, but my main concern is not how well I can suck up.  When I first got involved in leadership within the ASG, I naively thought that I would be able to make changes to the program.  Wow, how sorely mistaken I was.  I've realized that the ASG is nothing but political rubbish.  I am not going to abandon my responsibilities just yet, but I will soon be pulling away from the program.  What a let down.

Hello

September 28 2007

Hi! My name name Erica Steverson!

Im new on here , well. kinda new!

I live in kingston springs.

 I am 16! thats all you need to know!

Untitled

September 28 2007

i really do think i have a problem. but this time its nothing to do with the usual stuff.

 

this time its because of manatees.

 

im terrified of all animals in the water at practice or anywhere else. i get really jumpy every day out on the water now at the first splash i hear that i didnt expect. and the fact that its still dark out doesnt really help. cuz that only makes my imagination go crazy. and then i start thinking up even worse things than what could possibly happen!

 

manatees scare me. and dolphins scare me. and fish too, now. how pathetic is that?

 

like, the other day at practice, it was lightning really bad (we were on our way in cuz coach decided it wasnt safe anymore; and lightning is my other biggest fear), and a fish jumped in the boat. and hit me. and i spazed. then dana said she saw a dolphin jump out of the water, and she pointed to where. we were all watching, and osmething jumped, but it sure want a dolphin. it was a flipping huge fish is what it was.

 

after that i couldnt stop thinking about everything that might be swimming under us, and i was shaking the whole row back in. 

how people amaze me...

September 28 2007

so this has been one of the best weeks of my life....

 

i mean its kinda wierd to think about... but somewhere in the back of my head i feel like god shows me signs everyday of what he wants out of me and its usually through the people that i randomly meet...

 

for example... i just became a member of the campus entertainment board... and i met this amazing person... and not in the OMG HES SO HOTT amazing.. like this person is seriously a genuinly amazing person... he has so much depth... and in the 2 or 3 times we have hung out he knows more about me then some of my "friends" especially some of the other guys in my life... and in these few times we have been together he has taught me sooooo much about myself and others... its truly amazing.... plus no one has ever made me laugh as much as he has....

 

in all seriousness i have never been so excited about spending time with someone only because i feel like i learn so much about myself and others just from being with this person...

 

i dunno... its so crazy... especially after the past few weeks to now have him in my life... its just such a blessing...

 

i'll be the last person to talk to you about religion... especially cause im not really sure what i believe these days.. i mean dont get me wrong i believe in god... its just the specifics of everything that still doesnt settle with me... 

 

i dont even know where i was going with this post... i just sometimes feel like rambling on about my feelings and emotions cause hell im a girl and its just what i do... hahaha

 

well thats about it i think.... im just having a super week... minus the fact that i have 3 tests next week that i havent exactly started studying for.. OOPS!

 

but one of my best friends is coming in town today... AND IM SOOO EXCITED!!!! shes so kick ass.. i love her!!!

 

well thats really it....

 

till next time...

 

breathe in breathe out

tell me all of your doubt

everybody bleeds this way,

just the same

 

breathe in breathe out

move on and break down

if everyone goes away

i will stay 

 

we push and pull

and i fall down sometiems

and im not letting go

you hold the other line 

 

cause there is a light

in your eyes...

 

hold on hold tight

from out of your sight

and everything keeps moving on

 

hold on hold tight

make it through another night

everyday there comes a song with the dawn 

 

we push and pull

and i fall down sometimes

and im not letting go

you hold the other line

 

cause there is a light in your eyes

 

breathe in and breathe out 

 

look left look right

to the moon and the night

everything under the stars is in your arms 

 

cause there is a light in your eyes... in your eyes 

 

 

to everyday happiness....

{emily} 

The Guitar

September 28 2007

I'm really learning.

My Uncle Buddy tought me alot

on the guitar last night.

I was so happy.

And I'm leaving tonight for my Dads.

And I'm kinda exited about that.

Not kinda, REALLY.

And I'm super nervous.

 

 

 

Football

September 28 2007
Ok well last night was the Freshman football game. I was switched to a starting position and made the first tackle of the game I was really pumped, but we ended up losing to what I think was a bad call by the white hat. I know I should not blame someone else for what happend. Winners blame themselves and line back up and do it again until the get better. that is what coach says. I guess it stands true. Well I am really tired I just hope you guys have a great day. If you come to Dickson's home coming that is cool and thanks. It will be a blast. Hope to see you there. Peace.

Untitled

September 28 2007

Staring at the sea
Will she come?
Is there hope for me
After all is said and done
Anything at any price
All of this for you
All the spoils of a wasted life
All of this for you
All the world has closed her eyes
Tired faith all worn and thin
For all we could have done
And all that could have been

Ocean pulls me close
And whispers in my ear
The destiny I've chose
All becoming clear
The currents have their say
The time is drawing near
Washes me away
Makes me disappear

I descend from grace
In arms of undertow
I will take my place
In the great below

I can still feel you
Even so far away

 

    'The Great Below'  -  NIN

September 27, 2007, 10:26 P.M.

September 27 2007

I finished with my video shoot... again... but this time I think it will look really good. I also got a little bit more creative in my directing.

 

It's been a really long day. I went to work, ate cake, went to class, went back to work, ate more cake, skipped class to get my license renewed, went to my mom's office, went to one apartment, went to another apartment, went to Graham's house, then came back to my place... oh yeah, and ate more cake. I'm going to have to go on a diet when all the birthday cakes are eaten up.

 

And now I would go to bed but I have hardly had the chance to talk to my boyfriend, whom I should be hearing from after his soccer game. But that's ok, I'll just sleep in Saturday... 

 

Yeah... so Happy Birthday to me... 

 

 

Check this out!

September 27 2007
Make your own Windorph
Make your own WindorphOk so this is my little dude. I call him climbing turtle. That is his hippie name. His real name is Clem. I made him to look like a hippie getting ready for DCHS homecominng. What do you guys think?

Look here.

September 27 2007

Ya see Dickson County Homecoming is coming up. So you need to put on your blue and orange and meet us at the stadium at 7 o'clock We are facing the Riverdale Worriors and for anyone who knows anything about 5 A football you know they are good. Dang good. So show up eat a dang burger and enjoy one of the best days highschoolers have. Dang it.

 

 

 

 -- 

For some of the more slower ones I have highlighted the important words and phrases to make it easier.  

weird..... =>*

September 26 2007

MOOD: Slowly fading


Church was Amazing again. I pretty much just broke down but....now that i am home and sitting here i feel like i'm fading, slowly dieing (in a way), losing something but i dont know what.
I know i sound so weird and kinda stupid but.....i'm not confused persay, actually i feel like i am in control. But i'm fading away, everything is turning black and white, everything is getting bleary. It is weird, i've never felt like this.Anyways i've got to keep a smile on so... :) Happy Face Happy Face! :)
I suppose i shall go...talks to you people later

Untitled

September 26 2007

Racist, there are so many here in Hawaii.  Today this kid came over to me and said F***ing white kid. All of you white people are taking over. What i wanted to do was cuss him out and punch him in the face. BUT i said. Oh wow your full Chinese right??? he was like yeah why?

i said GO BACK TO CHINA YOUR IN AMARICA

 SHUT UP

 

 make me so mad. 

Been a while

September 26 2007

So... it has been a while since I have updated.... not really much going on. I am just working two jobs and going to school full time, not much fun.

 

I am headed outto california tommorow night. My brother and I are driving a moving truck with all my grandparents stuff in it out there. I should be back either monday morning or afternoon.

When I get back I plan on getting a Honda Sabre 1100 (a  big motorcycle) I can't wait to get it. My house still is not set up the way that I would like it to be... I can never seem to find time to work on it for any extended period of time.

 

Hope to update again soon... 

It seems as so.

September 26 2007

It seems that a remark I recently left has caused a few people to be upset. I meant the remark in no disrespect to the person. I see that I was somewhat rude but it I did not mean for it to come off as rude, more of joking. So it seems that I should apologize for the rudeness and making anyone upset or angry.

 

 

--

If you don't know what I am talking about then it probably doesn't pertain to you, therefore I am not apologizing to you. Idiot.  

A very skilled mime

September 26 2007

change of plans...

September 25 2007

 so small change in plans...

im no longer going to indiana this weekend.. but hopefully it will still be a good weekend...

 

anywho.... just a small update...

 

 

later!

-emily- 

What a Cruddy Week...

September 25 2007

Long story short, after those seven hours of shooting we have to re-shoot everything AGAIN, right from scratch. We even have to use new talent because the talent we used before is not avaliable.

 

You want to guess which day we're shooting?

 

Thursday. My birthday.

 

Which I am now suddenly dreading... 

Prelude 12/21

September 25 2007

This is what I brought you this you can keep,
This is what I brought you may forget me.
I promised to depart just promise one thing,
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

This is what I brought you this you can keep,
This is what I brought you may forget me.
I promise you my heart just promise to sing,
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

This is what I thought,
I thought you need me,
This is what I thought so think me naive,
I promise you a heart you promised to keep,
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep.

Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep

 

 

You have to love AFI sometimes.