so... there are obviously lots of good things about marriage.  and i'm sure you are very well aware of that.  so i won't bother to elaborate concerning all the positives of entering into this holy matrimony thing.  but i do want to tell you what might very well be my favorite--and yet at times my very least favorite--byproduct of being wed:

i spend a lot of time helping other people.  if you know me, you might suggest to others that i am very giving of my time.  i strive to invest in other people.  i believe that, as God has cared for me, i ought to in turn care for others.  and so, i often find myself agreeing to spend time that i might not really even have with other people.  and i believe that i benefit just as the other person might.  i am serving God in this way, and am very happy to do so.  my wife and i plan our lives and how we spend our time with this one thought probably more in mind than any other: "this life is not about us."

if you've made it this far in your reading, you might have the feeling that i'm patting myself on the back.  you also might be wondering what in the world this post actually has to do with marriage....

i think of myself--or thought of myself, rather--as a very giving person.  until marriage.  now all of a sudden, what used to be my own personal time to rest after spending a day or a week "giving" to others, is no longer my own personal time.  at least not always.  to actually share my life with someone, to actually become (in some way or another) one with that person, takes tremendous selflessness.  more than i often have.  as a single guy, i thought that i was so much like Jesus, giving my life for others.  i now realize how unlike Jesus i am indeed.  i am an incredibly selfish person.  being married has thrust this realization upon me.  i've said many times that this life is not about me, but deep down, i still want for it to be.  i want to serve God by giving of all of this "sectioned off and convenient portion of time."  and then i want to go home and rest, and think of myself.  marriage has taught me--christie has taught me what selflessness is.  she puts me ahead of herself over and over and over again.  she is truly like Christ in this way. 

marriage has taught me all over again that this life is not about me.  and now i pray that the Holy Spirit continue to transform me, to make me the same unselfish and giving person that Jesus was when he lived on this earth.