Two guys broke into the base last night.

No one, except Amber, saw them.  One of them accidently tapped her knee while standing next to her bed.  She woke up and pulled her covers from her face to see a flashlight shining in her eyes.  Two guys were standing in her room, one next to her bed and one next to another girl, Stephanie's bed.  They walked out just a few minutes later.  There were five girls sleeping in that room.  And to get to that room from the door we think they broke in through, they would have passed by all our bedrooms, so they could have been in all our rooms.  Nothing was taken or destroyed.  They didn't wake anyone or hurt anyone.  They just broke in, looked around, and left.  Amber laid in her bed for over two hours unable to move she was so scared.

It's weird.  I don't feel scared, but more violated.  Even driving around town, I look at every guy and think, was that one of them?  Did they come into my room too?  What were they doing there?  Did they want to hurt us?  Were they just bored kids?  Why were they just standing in Amber's room, watching them sleep?  Are they going to come back? 

But God is good, and although our locks were crappy (they are being changed today), we have an incredible Protector that will never let anything happen to us.

In peace I will both lie down and sleep, for You alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.  Psalm 4:8

All Access productions presents...

"No More Victims"

A dynamic multi media musical that focuses on the issue of bullying and self identity in America's public schools.

This Wednesday and Thursday!!

7:00 p.m.

YWAM Metro NY base in Smithtown, NY   (70 New York Ave.)

Click here to check out the promo video on their website at www.allaccessny.org

Don't miss it!!!!

Just a little background, YWAM Metro New York has been trying to get a location inside the city for 19 years!  And God has consistently closed the door until now.  Our new location is on E. 11th St. and I LOVE our neighborhood.  Here's some pics.  Keep in mind we are in the middle of renovating.
   The new office   The kitchen
   The living room   The bedroom  The view from the kitchen window.  You can see the Empire State Building.  It's really pretty at night...

     A park outside our back windows.  I love this park.  It is always filled with kids during the day.  We can sit on our fire escape and watch them or just enjoy the city.  It's great.
I'll try to put up some pictures after we finish renovating.

January has been a pretty busy month.  The rest of All Access's company members have returned for their next tour.  They are practicing all the time right now.  I LOVE their show.  Below are a few pictures from filming last week.

Brent, playing "the victim" or the geek

Johnny, the All-Star, and Kelsey, the Prom Queen

Amber, the New Girl

Chris, a punk cast member hanging in the hallways

The popular girls

Tori, a goth cast member.  He made a little girl at his church cry for 30 minutes!

Johnny, hanging out between takes.  I thought it was a neat angle.

The DTS is on outreach.  They were able to witness to prostitues, strippers, transvestites, and so on in Houston, Texas.  Now they are in Mexico doing ministry in the mountains outside Mexico City.
And then our team, the City Missions team, is doing renovations for our new office and apartment in the East Village right now.  I hope to take some photos next week of that and post them.

I have really been looking forward to the snow this year. It will be my first official full winter here in NY. Tonight it is supposed to snow 9 inches. But I can say it's different knowing that I will still wake up early and work tomorrow.

We are playing Christmas music through the office now. And sitting at my desk with a warm vanilla creme from Starbucks listening to Bing Crosby sing White Christmas, I just basked in how much I love Christmas. I would like to find some sugar cookies and have hot chocolate breaks each afternoon.

http://abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=1357615

Check it out. ABC Nightline did a great story on the Justice House of Prayer in DC. If you want to learn more about JHOP, go to www.jhop.org or www.bound4life.com

i saw icicles last night. it is so cold here. 30s and 40s and when the sun goes down, it drops into the 20s. burr.

a couple of us were talking about bears and got on the subject of hibernation. I'm starting to see a lot of benefits of hibernation. and what do you do when it's 4 in the morning and you can't sleep? you meditate on the idea of hibernation. so on average we sleep around 2,920 hours a year. that comes to around 4 months. i figure the best schedule would be 4 months awake, 2 months of sleep. just think about all the good things that would bring. there would be no early morning, i don't want to get out of bed feeling except for twice a year. you would have the entire night to play or catch up on errands or work on projects that you've always wanted to do but never had the time to do them. sleeping for two months straight, you would definitely lose weight so none of us would be fat. you wouldn't fall asleep during movies or classes (unless it's right before hibernation time). i mean, the benefits are endless. i know that our bodies would atraphy terrible during the two months of sleep and will would probably have to reteach ourselves how to walk every time we woke up, but hey, no early mornings! i just can't get past that one.

so this is what i do when i bored.

John Reuben arrived just a little while ago.  Yes, we are hosting a John Reuben concert tonight.  What?  Yes, he is still around.  But I love the atmosphere of getting ready for a big event like this.  Edison Glass and ZombieKat are opening for him.  I'll have fun regardless.

I haven't written much with meaning in a while. So I thought I would catch you guys up a bit.
My back is getting better. It is nice to be back working instead of just laying around. I mean, naturally I would love to just lay around for the rest of my life. Who wouldn't? But I hated thinking about all the things that I needed to get done and couldn't do. So it's nice to only take a rest break every once in a while from work instead of taking a work break from resting.
Next week is the urban ministry retreat. We are setting aside 3 days to pray and fast for God's direction for the urban ministry. It's so exciting to think that we are beginning this ministry, almost from the ground up. Most of the previous urban ministry has disappeared, so we are creating. But God is being very specific about us seeking Him during this time. It is incredible to co-create with God like this.
The guys on the base has bought air soft guns. There are little neon green pellets all over the base from their wars, and I think everyone has at least one red mark on their body from being shot. Tonight we had a shoot out in the dining room. At one point, I was literally crawling on the floor on my stomach under the tables picking up pellets to reload the guns. I don't know if any of you guys are into these air soft guns, but they are highly addictive. Now they are looking online to buy faster, better guns. I don't think they are going to get over these any time soon.
God and I have had some hard times this week. There is a lot that I don't want to go into details about, but I have gone back and forth with being highly disappointed in Him. Sometimes I feel like He is wanting me to go so much deeper with Him but my flesh is really kicking up against that. And then sometimes I just want to pack up, take my life back, and move back to TN because I'm just so frustrated. It will work out I'm sure, but it's just tough for now.
Oh, and 19 days until Rent!!!! Yeah!!!!

So tonight I cried at a 5 year olds funeral for his fish Fishy (or Nemo, he goes by both). After the sudden death, we all went over to the Burds house to console Tyler, the grieving owner. Poor kid just couldn't stop crying. It was so sad. So we all stood around while Tyler buried the fish, sobbing, and his grandmother said a prayer. Tyler's little brother Toby, who is just learning how to speak, paid his respects by saying "bye bye neno" over and over again. The dad made a little cross from a fallen branch laying next to us and stuck it in the ground over the burial plot. We were all laughing, but all of us girls cried too.

yeah for the new phusebox!
and yeah for the end of rainy days!
it has been raining for like 6 days straight out here.  and not just light rains, heavy horrible rain.  long island was going to wash away if it didn't stop.  and the poor base was flooding.  i had the carpet professionally cleaned just a month ago from previous flooding, and yeah, it flooded again. but today was beautiful, so praise God for that.
so i also want to say that i love my friends heather, kelsey, and brent who are sitting here with me.  not that they will ever read this.  they are funny.  i love living in community, because there are always people around to have fun with.

For any of you who ever went to Big Stuf....

Another beautiful believer has gone home...

Rick Pearson died last month of leukemia.

I cried.

You can visit his memorial website at www.rickpearson.org

I am growing to love the sound of trains. There is a station only blocks from where I live and I hear the whistle and rumble of the trains off and on all day. Somehow it reminds me of being a kid. I always remember when I would go to bed and everything would become silent, no matter where I was, I could always hear a train off in the distance.

So my back is getting stronger. Laying around day after day is getting hard. The staff prayed for me to have patience, and I definitely need some supernatural patience. But my times with God have been incredible. He has been kicking my butt lately, which is good but not the funnest thing. Brutal honesty. I think that is the direction my times with Him are heading. Just like a weak back can affect so much of a person's abilities, weak areas in my walk have affected many of my spiritual abilities. Now I'm just trying to get everything back in place, and I guess I have plenty of time to do that.

What an incredible passionate man of God. He is the director of YWAM New Haven, CT that reaches out to Yale University, and one of the best speakers we have grace our presence here at YWAM NY. He can quote scripture, TS Elliott, Aristostle, and St. Augustine all in one breath without ever looking at notes. Incredible. And what he says is so passionate and deep and simple all at the same time.

He led our staff training yesterday, and we are all still feeding off what he shared.

Christianity is a pilgramage towards home. Not heaven, but Christ Himself. And where is Christ? He dwells within us. Home is inside us.

But too often we live outside ourselves.

"Home is the center of my being where I can hear the voice that says I am His beloved, chosen, marked by His love, the delight of His life."

The ultimate journey yet to remain is the journey into the stillness deep within our souls

Rest.

Listen.

Wake up, o sleeper. Learn who you are.

A child.

A lover of God.

A revolutionary.

We are in a war, a war the enemy constantly tries to convince us isn't happening.

The world is not a five star motel for us to gain as much comfort and pleasure from before our visit is over.

This world is a prison, a place of correction and training.

And we have weapons. Of course, we have the typical armor of God, but there are other weapons that are defeating the enemy in great ways in our current time.

Acts of compassion. We need to be a people who preach less and act more. The world doesn't care about our philosphy. They care about our hearts, our sincerity. How can they believe that our religion is based around love if we don't love? When we stand up for compassion and act out in love, it dissolves the lie that we are a fake, heartless people.

Intimacy with God. This so speaks for itself, yet we abandon this first. Why can't we see that knowing Him in intimate ways helps the world realize that He is real? People can argue our beliefs, but they can't debate our experiences.

Music and the arts. What captures our attention? What catches our eye? Art. Creativity. Colors and unique design. Beautiful chords with honest lyrics. Through music and the arts, we can convey God's thoughts and feelings to a world that doesn't believe in Him.

"We are a generation stuck between a dream and the reality of that dream coming true."

I want to see the dream come true.

I want to fight.

I want to sacrifice.

I am glad that the more I lay flat, the better my back feels, but I'm so tired of just laying around! I am ready to do... anything. As long as it doesn't involve laying around.

So I sneezed a few minutes ago and it hurt so bad!!
Why?
I've injured my back. Now I don't mean that my back is a little sore. I mean, I've injured my back. To the point that sometimes I can't walk and many times I can't stand up straight. So for four days I've been laying here on the couch in my room, icing my back, watching movies, reading my Bible, playing on the internet (thank God I have a laptop).
I went to the doctor yesterday and he said that the pain is either coming from a joint or a disk. I have a strong feeling it's a disk. He gave me these anti-inflammatory pills, well they're not really pills, more like little balls, that I dissolve under my tongue. He's a homeopathic doctor, which means he likes really natural remedies, probably like God intended us to take care of our bodies.
So please pray for me, friends. Pray that I have a quick recovery, because I hate not being able to work. Pray that I heal completely. Pray that I have the money to deal with this and still pay my normal bills. And pray that I really spend quality time with God and not TLC and my DVD player.

Tonight I had a date with God.
He told me a few days ago that Friday night He was going to take me out. Don't ask questions or try to figure out what we will do. Just wait for Friday night.
So I'm sitting at the cookout with the new DTS students and God tells me He's taking me to the beach to watch the sunset. Just a few minutes later, Nina says she wants to go to the beach. So Nina, Lisa, and I pile into my car and drive to Short Beach, listening to Jack Johnson on the way.
When we get there, the sunset is beautiful. Nina and Lisa walk down to the surf, but I hang back and sit on the beach to spend my time with God. With the way the beach is positioned, I can just see their torsos every once in a while. A few other couples and families are still there from their day at the beach. A young boy is yelling for his mom, switching from English to another language. Another man is fishing. So I sit watching the sunset. The sky is one huge, solid dark cloud like a canopy hovering over us breaking only right before the horizon to reveal the bright reds and oranges of the setting sun. I can hear crickets chirping in the woods behind me concealing gigantic mansions that are occupied by who knows who. Every sound is exaggerated. A plane flies overhead, and I look up to see if it is visible through the dark clouds. I look over to my friends. Lisa is sitting and watching the waves, small waves, if you would even call them waves. Nina is standing, but I can only see her from the shoulders up. She stretches her arms over her head, throws her body into a cartwheel, and then all I see is her legs until her arms and head appear again. Legs. Arms. Legs. Arms. Legs. Arms. And then she disappears, swimming into the ocean. The sun is setting further. It is getting darker. The lights from the shores of Connecticut across the Long Island Sound are becoming more visible. I lay my head on my knees and just think for a while, enjoying the slightly chilled breeze flowing over me.
It was an intimate time with God, but different than usual. He didn't smother me with words about how much He loved me. He didn't brag about how special I am, or all those things that I selfishly love. Instead, He allowed me to just observe Him. And I saw His strength. I saw His creativity. I felt His awesomeness and all encompassing presence. And in moments like those, when God is God regardless of who I am, I realize again that there are other reasons why I follow God. Sometimes I follow God because He is so good and kind. But on nights like tonight, I remember that I also follow God because He is God. He is in control and much bigger than me. It reminds me of the book of Job.
"Do you have an arm like God's, and can your voice thunder like his? Then adorn yourself with glory and splendor, and clothe yourself in honor and majesty. Unleash the fury of your wrath, look at every proud man and bring him low, look at every proud man and humble him, crush the wicked where they stand. Bury them all in the dust together; shroud their faces in the grave. Then I myself will admit to you that your own right hand can save you."
Sometimes when I am worshipping Him, the best word I can come up with to describe Him is... God.

Good news.
Nick, our base director, had a meeting with a church in Brooklyn about hosting a lot of our ministry in their building. We have been trying to find a location inside NYC for literally 14 years, so this was a big deal to us. And he said yes. It should be a great facility. The Frontier Missions DTS just finished their school there and really enjoyed it. It is a great neighborhood. Bay Ridge, right off the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway (the BQE for locals). So we are getting ready to get really busy as an urban team, which I am really excited about. The scary part is this is a huge step towards relocating our ministry into the city. A part of me really wants to move into the city, and a part of me is really scared. It's so expensive!
So I'm not going to think about it until I have to. Another good point is I have really expressed a desire to take over our short term mission teams that we host in the city. Of course, now they will be hosted in Brooklyn at this church, and I will pack up and live in Brooklyn one week after another as each team comes. But this is what is really special to me about this. The teams are usually youth groups or college groups. When I moved here, I was figuring I would not be doing youth ministry anymore, and although that made me sad, I figured I would enjoy whatever God had for me. But now I see myself getting back into youth ministry, but different than I've ever done it. I get to plan the mission trips and host group after group. I get to work with youth all over the country, encouraging them, teaching them, and doing ministry with them. Can you believe it?? And of course if any of you ever wanted to get together a mission trip inside NYC, just let me know.
“Do not share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure.” I Timothy 5:22

posted some pictures from the ball and our labor day picnic...