Blake Haley
Social
Relationship Status
Single
Highschool
McEachern High School
College
Belmont University
I learned a lot today!
June 07 2005
I'm sitting in my room right now now doing much of anything...there is so much that I am feeling inside, so much that I want to accomplish, so much that I wish I understood!
Sometimes I feel like a bunny rabbit running back in forth on an advertisement at the top of the computer screen. Why is he running? Is it for nothing? I wonder. Is there something that needs to be accomplished or of more importance that he could be doing, yet he finds himself doing everything that he can except the one thing that matters? It isn't even like there is a race. He isn't racing a tortoise, he is just running back and forth, back and forth. Ahhhh...I hate that feeling of doing the same thing everyday, day after day.
You know what I hate more than that? I hate waiting for something to happen, waisting precious time. For example, I am leaving for college in 74 days. And I feel as though life has become a giant waiting room. I mean, the meaning of my life isn't to attend Belmont in the fall. For all I know, I could come down with an illness that keeps me from attending this fall...who am I to say what is going to happen? I don't mean to sound morbid, or pessimistic, it is just that I don't want to sit on my butt any longer...why am I waisting my life waiting to leave Powder Springs? I need to live NOW...one day at a time.
And while I am on the subject of waiting...I have recently discovered that I have become the very thing that I have always taken pride in not being. (I'm not sure if that sentence made any sense, so let me explain). Let it be known by all that I am a hopeless romantic. In past years, I wouldn't have admitted this, but there is no denying it...I swoon when watching chick flicks and I dream of being pursured and falling in love. Now I think this is completely healthy and normal. The thing that I hate, and want to kick myself in the shin for is not being content with waiting for it to happen. You see, I am 18 years old and have never been in a serious relationship...to be honest, emberrassingly honest, my last boyfriend was in middle school. I'm not so sure this is normal, though I don't feel that it is a bad thing.
This evening I was sitting with a good friend of mine at Waffle House and I got off on a tangent concerning my feeling about love/relationships, more specifically my love life (or lack there of...haha). I guess I never expected to meet anyone that I would feel completely comfortable around and love at the same time. I thought that there would be some kind of game that had to be played. But, tonight something clicked...or maybe it has been in the process of clicking for some time now. I am completely wrong! What if there is someone out there who will think that you are great, just being you? The good and the bad. For me, that is a nice thought. And in recent months I have had glimpses that have given me a new hope. I am thankful for the friendships I have been given that are genuine! There is nothing like being able to have a conversation with someone and feeling that they really care. Whether it be a goofy banter, a good ol' cry, or a serious discussion. I need those! I need to be myself. I'm not someone who is very secretive...if you ask me something I will usually tell. The thing is, I don't think there are too many people who actually want to know what is going on with you if they ask. Oh, I can't tell you how much it means to me when someone really wants to know about my life. Don't get me wrong, I honestly don't enjoy talking about myself all the time (I don't think that I have that much worth saying all the time), I think it is important to share the floor...a balanced converation is the way to go!
In conclusion, I do know that I no longer want to try and make things happen in my life that are out of my control. It is foolish and a waist of my time. I also, want to be proactive in life. I want to live out what I believe and stop being a lazy bum. And I want to trust God more...I want to fall deeply in love with Him. And lastly, I want to follow God and actively do what He tells me to...no more heedless listening for me, just reckless following! (James 1).
Sometimes I feel like a bunny rabbit running back in forth on an advertisement at the top of the computer screen. Why is he running? Is it for nothing? I wonder. Is there something that needs to be accomplished or of more importance that he could be doing, yet he finds himself doing everything that he can except the one thing that matters? It isn't even like there is a race. He isn't racing a tortoise, he is just running back and forth, back and forth. Ahhhh...I hate that feeling of doing the same thing everyday, day after day.
You know what I hate more than that? I hate waiting for something to happen, waisting precious time. For example, I am leaving for college in 74 days. And I feel as though life has become a giant waiting room. I mean, the meaning of my life isn't to attend Belmont in the fall. For all I know, I could come down with an illness that keeps me from attending this fall...who am I to say what is going to happen? I don't mean to sound morbid, or pessimistic, it is just that I don't want to sit on my butt any longer...why am I waisting my life waiting to leave Powder Springs? I need to live NOW...one day at a time.
And while I am on the subject of waiting...I have recently discovered that I have become the very thing that I have always taken pride in not being. (I'm not sure if that sentence made any sense, so let me explain). Let it be known by all that I am a hopeless romantic. In past years, I wouldn't have admitted this, but there is no denying it...I swoon when watching chick flicks and I dream of being pursured and falling in love. Now I think this is completely healthy and normal. The thing that I hate, and want to kick myself in the shin for is not being content with waiting for it to happen. You see, I am 18 years old and have never been in a serious relationship...to be honest, emberrassingly honest, my last boyfriend was in middle school. I'm not so sure this is normal, though I don't feel that it is a bad thing.
This evening I was sitting with a good friend of mine at Waffle House and I got off on a tangent concerning my feeling about love/relationships, more specifically my love life (or lack there of...haha). I guess I never expected to meet anyone that I would feel completely comfortable around and love at the same time. I thought that there would be some kind of game that had to be played. But, tonight something clicked...or maybe it has been in the process of clicking for some time now. I am completely wrong! What if there is someone out there who will think that you are great, just being you? The good and the bad. For me, that is a nice thought. And in recent months I have had glimpses that have given me a new hope. I am thankful for the friendships I have been given that are genuine! There is nothing like being able to have a conversation with someone and feeling that they really care. Whether it be a goofy banter, a good ol' cry, or a serious discussion. I need those! I need to be myself. I'm not someone who is very secretive...if you ask me something I will usually tell. The thing is, I don't think there are too many people who actually want to know what is going on with you if they ask. Oh, I can't tell you how much it means to me when someone really wants to know about my life. Don't get me wrong, I honestly don't enjoy talking about myself all the time (I don't think that I have that much worth saying all the time), I think it is important to share the floor...a balanced converation is the way to go!
In conclusion, I do know that I no longer want to try and make things happen in my life that are out of my control. It is foolish and a waist of my time. I also, want to be proactive in life. I want to live out what I believe and stop being a lazy bum. And I want to trust God more...I want to fall deeply in love with Him. And lastly, I want to follow God and actively do what He tells me to...no more heedless listening for me, just reckless following! (James 1).
gone...
June 03 2005
to the mountains of North Carolina! I have to check out my brothers girlfriend...
I wonder if she will pass inspection? Only time will tell.
I wonder if she will pass inspection? Only time will tell.
