From years of observing organized, American Christian subculture, I assumed that being a follower of Christ meant participating in religiously charged political battles such as the fight to keep the 10 Commandments in public places and prayer in schools. When I looked at Jesus, He seemed more concerned with feeding the hungry. I assumed that Christianity was about stewardship campaigns to raise huge sums of cash to build large church buildings for people to attend so they can participate in a class that will teach them the five points to living a “better life.” Jesus said sell everything you have and give your money to the poor. I thought church was about making sure the choir sang well, the budget balanced, the sermons challenged but didn’t offend and always making the annual church hog-roast better than last year. I discovered that Jesus was more interested in defending the weak and marginalized. I could go on, because my box was quite full. As I unpacked the box, and stacked its contents up against the Jesus I rediscovered in scripture, I soon realized that God no longer fit in that box. He was so much more than, and nothing like, the religious ideology I had packaged Him with. And I discovered that I have so much more to learn, un-learn and re-learn about my faith.

I am not condemning political pursuits that seek to preserve the Christian history of our nation. Nor am I opposed to building churches and structures where believers gather for worship. And based upon my fondness for organization, I’m certainly in favor of a balanced budget in my church. Yet, as I stripped my faith down to its very core, I discovered significant differences in what was important to me compared to what was important to Jesus. But most disturbingly, I saw a vast difference between how He lived out His message compared to how I was living His message.

So I’m on a quest; a quest to unlearn my misconceptions about what being a follower of Jesus looks like; a quest to relearn everything I can about what and who Jesus cared about; and a quest to learn what was important to Him and what wasn’t. I no longer believe we are called to live a “religious” life. But rather, as followers of Jesus, I believe we are compelled to live a life that reflects the passions that were evident in His life, even if those passions don’t always align with the passions of organized religion. And what I’ve learned so far has convinced me that this journey has and will continue to change the way I think about my faith, and ultimately, how I live in response to the life of Jesus. Although I don’t know how God’s presence in my life will finally look at the end of this journey, I do know one thing: He’s not going to fit in my box anymore.

-Relevant Magazine