i'm so sorry!!! I cant say i know how you feel...but i've been in the same kind of thing. And its so not cool. Just hang in there...things will get better! Keep looking to God and dont let the devil take you down. I used to put up walls between me and the people around me after a bunch of people i trusted faild me. I felt safe that way....but i got REALLY lonly. And again i cant say i know how you feel or tell you how to make it all better, but i can say. God helped me take down MY walls and to trust people again. And i know He can help you too. I'll be praying for you :)

hey girl, i just want you to know that i know how you feel. that's something i've been struggling with these past two years. i would think that i was getting closer to someone and then they would hurt me. maybe a lot of it just had to do with me, who knows. i just want you to know that even though you feel like this, God will still be there for you... even if it doesn't feel like it. I've read that he puts things like this in our lives just to test our faith, to see how faithful we'll be to him. i've failed many many times, and i can't even count the number of times i've cried myself to sleep. but i'm finally at that point to where i'm understanding that just because i feel alone, doesn't mean i am. i've prayed and prayed for the Lord to place that one person in my life, that one person who's always there for me, no matter what... and for a while i thought he was ignoring me, but he wasn't. it took me so long to understand that the one person that i was praying for was really him, and once i started to understand that he placed these amazing people in my life. i've become so much more open to love and let people love me. just keep your faith strong girl. i know that we dont know eachother that well at all, but i just want you to know that if you EVER need anything, please let me know. i understand how you feel, and there are times that i still struggle with that, just don't give up. you can message me on phusebox or even go to my myspace, it's www.myspace.com/crazycoolcorr i'll be praying for you girl. in Christ, courtney.

i fall into that a lot. not so bad as before, but i still do. after six years. i do know exactly what you mean because i'm almost in the same predicament as you in this moment. courtney is totally right in all she's saying. spend time with him when you feel absolutely alone and like a screw up and when people piss you off because they don't understand or when you don't understand them. (that's what i've had to do a lot this week). AIM me if you want too: she knows Jesus

I know I don't know you at all and I actually just got back on phusebox for the first time in about a year ha and read this.. and I have some advice and its very simple and you have probably already heard it but I noticed you said that every spiritual leader you look up to turns out to be fake.. and that happens a lot and a lot of people are out there for themselves but just remember to keep your eyes on christ and remember the cross... if anything I say gets to you let it be this... remember the cross and the sacrifice that Christ did for you. Remember that so when you go through the hard times in your life that the joy and beauty of that moment as well as the sadness can help you get through it..... I know it will...