i am not a sweatshirt.

February 24 2006

so.....an update.

i still hurt like woah, but i think in the long run things really will be ok.

i always see girls hanging all over guys....in the courtyard, at the movies, at the mall....everywhere.

i pity them.

dont they realize that to guys we are just coats.

we can be discarded at anytime due to others once the newness wears off.

guys think we are just here to make them look and feel good.

i'm so tired of being thrown away like an old rag when i'm of no further use.

i don't want to be just some guys old sweatshirt.

i also want to be his friend.

i want to be someone he can trust.

someone who he can talk to when he needs to talk.

i want to be some one he can tell anything to.

i dont just want to wrapped around his shoulders and discarded once he's found another one to take my place.

i guess what i'm getting at is that i'm really tired of having to pull myself together.

i'm sick of picking up all the little pieces of my heart.

this time i'm just going to let them lay there.

i'm not going to even try to glue them back together.

they are just going to sit there and serve as a reminder that once you've told someone you love them it's the key to the ultimate oppotunity to hurt you.

and opportunity they will take.


February 25 2006
I understand it's to late now..but next time(if you even try again) don't give them your full heart. that's usually our main downfall. we get so comfortable in the relationship, and feel like we should give it away because we trust the other person. We give them our heart and instantly become vonerable. all that has to happen is for them to let go. and when they let go our heart hardens and then when it hits the ground it shatters into a million pieces like glass on a marble floor..and it hurts so bad... and you'll never want to trust anyone again. ..yah i understand you... im sorry.. i don't know you but i feel your pain.