hmmm. went through some of my old notebooks the other day. found this. wrote it last year in 9th. thought it might be nice to get some feedback since only one person has read it. so....read. and comment. or dont. do whatever.

...

Confrontation of Pessimist and Optimist.

"Stop."
"How do you partake in such obscenities?" he asked.
"Scars breed on the soft skin that hugs your kneecaps,
And you are getting wrinkles in the creases of a beautiful face I once loved.
Dark bags are even beginning to hang from bloodshot eyes.
Tell me now Lover, how does it feel to know that your beauty and youth are detoriating even as we speak?
Every step you take brings you closer to the end,
And every breath brings you nearer to polluted lungs.
Stop tapping your toe now before there is no song left to sing!"

"Hush," she said.
"The scars are from falling, but no harm ever came from trying.
The wrinkles are from laughing; always remember to enjoy the small things.
I have bags for life is too short and splendorous to close one's eyes.
Tell me Lover, how does it feel to not know you let life pass you by in oblivion?
Life is a waltz.
Sometimes you fall, but you have to keep on dancing,
For you cannot have ever truly lived without failing.
Keep on breathing until the end and you won't have a thing to regret."
And with that she continued on with her dancing.

hey i think you're cute
would you like to be my new best friend?
we can talk for hours or just lay in bed
you're just the kind of kid i could grow old with
so won't you walk with me to the park up the road
i told you that i'd be right back
you said that i'll be the judge of that
'cause see boys they have a tendency of running from me
as fast as they can i don't know why
and i just laughed and asked if you'd like a coke or some sort of assorted beverage from the diner up the road
if so, you should walk with me
feel free to hold my hand
feel free to kiss me on the cheek even though i'd prefer the lips

hey i think you're groovy
would you wanna see a movie with me?
we can sit in uncomfortable seats and eventually
i'll get the nerve up to put my arm around you
can i put my arms around you?
'cause i'd sure like to
it'll be like an episode of boy meets world
except without the commercials
and i'm just fine with that
how about you?
i like the way you talk
i like your died black hair
i love your halfass accent you stole from the foreign movies
i like your pretty eyes
and how you're afraid of the dark
well i am too, so would you like to take a walk with me
through a well-lit park just up the block
i'll be the bright side of your bad day
i'll be the bright side of your bad nights
i'll be the bright side of your bad day
if you'll be mine

"Hey"
 Backseat goodbye ♥

...

what do you say to someone when it needs to be said but you dont want to ruin a friendship?

SapphireBow (9:56:37 PM): I can't wait to feel a rifle's touch again
XxNyCxLoVexX (9:56:46 PM): but first
XxNyCxLoVexX (9:56:51 PM): ur going to give me
XxNyCxLoVexX (9:56:53 PM): my cd back
SapphireBow (9:57:03 PM): don't interupt my dream sequence
XxNyCxLoVexX (9:57:13 PM): give me my cd back
SapphireBow (9:57:19 PM): "and the clouds opened up
XxNyCxLoVexX (9:57:24 PM): I WANT MY CD
SapphireBow (9:57:32 PM): and God placed a rifle in Danny's hands
SapphireBow (9:57:51 PM): and he said, 'Spin, my son.'
SapphireBow (9:58:18 PM): And then the earth opened up
SapphireBow (9:58:26 PM): and Stephanie came from Hell
SapphireBow (9:58:32 PM): and she demanded her CD
XxNyCxLoVexX (9:58:39 PM): UR SO MEAN!!
arsonisticeweasl (9:58:54 PM): lol!
mestupkid309 (9:58:55 PM): i am crying.

danny ray you are too funny.

  well... 

  band. 

  i think what needs to be said has already been said by the other band kids. 

  read their sites. 

  cause i'm lazy. 

  but i will say one thing... 

  the drumline. 

  HOT. 

band.

mmhmm.

its gunna be a great year.

silly rabbit.

trix are for kids.

  so the summer is winding down. 

  maybe not for some of you. 

  but for me it is. 

  sucks that band kids have a shorter summer than others. 

  oh well. 

  i kinda wish it'd last longer. 

  i always feel empty at the end of the summer. 

  kinda like i missed out on something. 

  but i dont know what. 

  i just feel like i didn't do what i was supposed to do or something. 

  it's weird. 

  but this summer was fun. 

  i got to know some people a whole lot more. 

  i'm going to miss those late night convos. 

  but i can't stay up all night and still make good grades and do band. 

  it's just not physically possible. 

  and i'm going to miss making tacos at 12 am. 

  and drawing with sidewalk chalk. 

  and playing video games. 

  oh, i'm going to miss video games. 

  but no time during the school year. 

  i need to cheer up... 

  summer's not over yet. 

..............................

only 2 more days!!

 <-- i want to be there...right now. 

 <3

  so i had this convo earlier. 

  it went a little somethin like this- 

  ... 

 me: hey 

  them: who's this? 

  me: um...holly.

  them: oh you want joel? 

  me: who is this? 

  them: this is his little sister. 

  me. oh hey. whats up? 

  them: KOOL CHICA!!! 

  them: wat it do? 

  me: ? 

  them: wat it do? 

  me: what does what do? 

  them: lol it sez what it sez 

  me: um... 

  me: blue? 

  them: jeez are you wite or somthin? 

  them: wat it do means wats ^? 

  ... 

  jeez. 

  they've even got slang for slang now. 

  and yes. 

  as a matter of a fact i am white. 

  well no one is updating much so i decided i would. 

  welp, me being the band nerd i am must say this... 

  7 MORE DAYS!! 

  *whispers* you have seven days.... 

  haha, well, jacob and i were talking on the phone and we decided that all the band kids are just going to drop dead during rehearsal. 

  *shrugs* 

  oh well. 

  man, i love you guys and i hope we can make this year everything last year was and more. 

  everyone is out of town right now! 

  i so bored. 

  call me or something. 

  i'll love you forever if you do. 

  sry milly. 

  i sorta stole this from your site. 

  woot for the flutes. 

  and i'm going to miss all you who left me. 

  this year will be...different. 

  i'm going to miss jessica cracking random jokes and shoving her pic up our butts. 

  and becky getting us back on track. 

  and lawson's odd metaphors. 

  oh, and hey ari, your plume is on backwards. :D 

  ok. so this trip was pretty great despite all the stupid family arguments we always have. once we got to nyc things were pretty alright. anyway, it's picture time! 

  this doesn't have anything to do with my trip or ny but i like big shoes. mwahaha.....warped tour was great. 

  and there is my lesbian lover with the big shoe.....mwahahaha!!! 

  that's my sister, me, and my cousins alicia, and tyler out in the bay. 

  this is my sister, dad, and me in central park. we were so unbelievably lost at the time it's not even funny. 

  wow. 

  yes. why yes they do. 

  the most amazing thing i have ever seen. 

 collins from rent and me. he had the most amazing voice. 

  angel and mimi from rent and me. 

  this guy was so cool. he drew my picture in times square. 

  the finished product. 

  me tying my shoe in front of cbgb. 

  i love street musicians and artists and even awesome poetry scribbled in chalk on the cracked cement. 

  because there's nothing like a broadway show.

  so that's it kids. i think there's more under my pictures if you wanna see.  

  love, hugs, and dead puppies, 
  -holly 

  well... 

  i'm back. 

  it was.... 

  interesting? 

  well, that's not the word, but its the first word that comes to mind. 

  family get togethers are always interesing. 

  especially with mine... 

  anyway, i missed you kids lots. 

   i'll put pictures up later. 

  but i'm to lazy now. 

  so i'm off to warped tour and then to ny. 

  see you guys when i get back! 

  i've been disappointed by two different guys in the past 24 hours.  

  i'm feeling a little crushed right now. 

  only about a week before i go to new york to hang out with only the coolest kids ever!  
  and then it's off to nyc!  
  damn.  
  i love that place. 

  a week and a day til warped tour! 

  anyone going? 

  holly is FINALLY 15! 

  sheesh, it took long enough to get here! 

Alice came to a fork in the road.
 "which road do I take? " she asked.
"where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat
 " I don't know, " Alice answered.
 "Then," said the cat,
 "it does not matter.

 lol! brilliant!

 this band is wow.

 hee hee!

   <- best book ever.

i want to go back so bad.

 <--woah...  

  *gasp* it's ororon!!

   aww sora!! i want to hug him!

  aw, riku! i want to hug him too!

 oh. hello!

  ^^aww...not even cool.^^ 

  got my hair cut today 

  went grocery shopping and some fat old lady laughed at me. 

  i'm so sick of people it's not even funny. 

  i'm sick of wasting time and energy on hating them though so i just walked on by whereas a week ago i would have told her to shove it up her fat ass.  at least i don't weigh three hundred pounds. 

  you know what? let them laugh. 

in the end God's the only one that can judge you and he will take care of things. 

  but i will never understand why people are made to be so closed minded. 

  if they don't believe in it then surely it must be wrong. 

  if you don't look or act like everyone else then surely there must be something wrong with you. 

  you know what? 

  I'm so sick of adults trying to force their thoughts, their morals onto me. 

  all while they blow each other up on foriegn soil. 

  as we were told growing up, as we will one day tell our children "don't fight. violence is not the answer". 

  why do they tell us this and then turn around to fight a war? 

  it's the same basic princible. 

  no matter what you say, it's still violence. 

  and i'm not trying to sound like a tree hugger or anything. 

  because i'm not. 

  i don't know what i am. 

  i don't even know where i stand on my thoughts of all this. 

  just stop trying to teach me to be fucking righteous when you can't even control your own pathetic little worlds. 

  i don't want your war. 

  new screenames everyone! 

  Xxdidyoujustpoot 

and

  imaloserkidyeahh 

  welp, this is my second post of the day, thus pointing out that yessir indeedy, i do have an addiction. 

  anyway...i've been trying to skateboard lately since there's nothing else really to do. 

  i love it. 

  it's so incredibly fun.  

  but i have to use my sister's board because i dont own one and her's is a crappy gross board. 

  so... 

  anyone have a board that they would be interested in selling to me? 

I CAN'T WAIT ANY LONGER!!!

 band time is almost here and i think i'm going to cry!

 leadership workshop was today (and tomorrow) and i dont think i have a chance.

 but it's all good.

 i can honestly say i've never loved anything so much before.

  i'm just so excited!! 

 oh, and congragulations to ari and milly for making dm!

 i'm so happy for you guys!