So Long, I'm Gone...

January 15 2006


The gate is wide, the road is paved in moderation. The crowd is kind and quick to pull you in. Welcome to the middle ground. It's safe and sound and until now it's where I've been. Cause it's been fear that ties me down to everything. But it's been love, YOUR LOVE that cuts the strings.





 





So long status quo, I think I just let go. You make me want
to be brave. I wanna be brave. The way it always was, is no longer good enough. You make me want to be brave. Brave…





 





I am small, And I speak when I'm spoken to. But I am willing to risk it all. I say Your name, just your name and I'm ready to jump, even ready to fall... Why did I take this vow of compromise? Why did I try to keep it all inside?






So long status quo
, I think I just let go. You make me want to be brave. I wanna be brave. The way it always was, is no longer good enough. You make me want to be brave. Brave…







I've never known a fire that didn't begin with a flame. Every storm will start with just a drop of rain. But, if you believe in me. That changes everything. So long, I'm gone…



So long status quo, I think I just let go. You make me want to be brave. I wanna be brave. The way it always was, is no longer good enough. You make me want to be brave. Brave…








This says absolutely everything... the pictures are random, but they fit perfectly. So long status quo, i think i just let go...

What is your status quo?
What is it that the strings of fear bind you to?
What if someone cut them, and you were free?

I ride on your prayers...
JV

not much of a loco gato kinda man...

January 13 2006
So yesterday I had my first experience in authentic Hawaii food... and it was quite the experience. This wonderful and strange creation consist of two hamburger patties, two over-easy eggs, smothered in brown gravy and over white rice. They call this style of "food" "Loco" which is spanish for "crazy" and i think it might be an adequate description. Oh the irony...

here is a wonderful visual description for you.


this next pic is a cat who lives here at the BSU... i HATE him... i've actually thrown him across the room a few times.



Love never fails! (1 cor 13 8)

Untitled

January 11 2006
well... were up to day 3 here in Hilo... and ill be honest, it's been quite the adventure! I "moved" into a house with 4 other guys today... i'm stayin in the lower level with 2 other guys. i have a twin mattress on the floor... and its awesome, everything i need... and im even thinkin it's gonna work out better than the two foot too short couch i've been on since i got here... haha

but things are going well... God has definitely proven himself faithful!
got a few pics for you to enjoy, feel free to comment and let me know you are still there...

**this is Anavah (john's (my boss who is 25) daughter) playing in my rainbows, more like skiing for her**


**yesterday we got to go "exploring"... it was awesome, here im standing on lava (cooled) in the ocean watching waves crash against it and splash 40 feet in the air, then one splashed against my lava and i got soaked... here i was contimplating the passage in Job 38, read that and it will give you a better perspective on this pic**


** les and i had a short lay-over in maui so jeff and hodge came and saw us for a bit, they were awesome and seem to be really in their "element", and honestly jeff martin is too much for this island! **


**yeah, and the rumors are true... this milk is $8, given it's at our lovely 711 thats right down the road, but still thats almost 3 times the price of a gallon of gas... last night les and i went there and bought a $10 bowl of cereal for this morning... haha, im gonna go broke buying food in this town...**


**this is our lovely BSU (BCM) here in Hilo... it's really cool, a lot of student come and hang out here all day inbetween all their classes...**


** these lovely individuals are amazing! they came to send us off... for that i will be forever greatful! **

and thats all for now, i gotta go find a postoffice to send some papers in so i can get paid... so i can buy more food.... haha

you guys are in my prayers and i hope we're in your's

"Love never fails.." 1cor 13:8

Untitled

January 10 2006
What up guys.. if by chance you decided that you loved me enough to send me something cool and make me feel like im at home here is my address....

just put mine or Les's name on it

1409 Kapiolani St.
Hilo Hi, 96720

Love you guys,
All In

Hilo

January 10 2006
So... Im here... I've been on 4 planes today and 5 different flights, in the air for 14 hours, in 5 different airports and now im finally resting on a couch in the BCM that's about 2 feet too short...

At the moment i can barely concentrate to type these words, so if they are a little nonsensical, nevermind... but i wanted to write and say that i got here.

All is well at the moment. Les and I are both a little overwhelmed by everything. After all, it has been an emotionally traumatic day! But, God is faithful!

It's times like this when I find awesome peace in the fact that this life is not about me. I took a short glance at the sunrise as Tracie was taking me to the airport this morning and He settled my heart with that thought.

I love you guys and i covet your prayers!
All In...


I'M GOING TO PICK A FIGHT... (best William Wallace accent)

December 08 2005


**A seven-year old boy was at the center of a Nashville
courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who
should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by
his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in
keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family
unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court
when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he
adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge suggested that he
live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him.  After considering the remainder of the immediate family and
learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among
them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to
propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check
legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge
granted temporary custody to the Tennessee Vols, whom the boy firmly
believes are not capable of beating anyone. **

found this on someone's facebook and thought it was hillarious...

oh, don't get all bent out of shape... it's only football...



I CAN NOT WAIT!

December 01 2005

34 more days till we... as a generation will gather for His renown.... His fame... His glory...


Passion 06....


one chance...


one life....


make it count...


make it matter...


live for something eternal...


live for something great....


live for His Renown.....


www.268generation.com
Isaiah 26:8



Untitled

November 26 2005

So, it's 2 days after thanksgiving and you're bored out of your mind. Nobody is left in town and you are out of ideas. What do you do? Humanize your favorite childhood heros... the ninja turtles! (minus donatello)...


It makes for an interesting evening... or atleast it killed about 20 minutes of our time!

Untitled

November 21 2005



"I love to think of nature as an unlimited
broadcasting station, through which God speaks to us every hour, if we
will only tune in." - George Washington Carver ...


This is Hilo, Hawaii

Untitled

November 07 2005

In my confusion and frustration, I look to the ever stable and Lord of all, Father I was put here to serve. On him, I rely, for answers to, season of which to pass, and points at which to meet on this journey He has me on. All dependence on and clinging to, a false sense of security or a useless lifestyle spent fleeting “risk”, is only from the enemy. I will not be swayed by his influence. I will continue to search completely after the heart of God Almighty. This path doesn’t promise anything other than His glory and so, it is my life-blood and purpose. My focus is clear and my heart is set.

Starlight and Sweetness... Mr. Wertz

November 04 2005




fallin' asleep to the sound of stars shootin' round the moon
but i can't watch them fly tonight, baby
i'm too busy watching you
i guess your smile is the sun's way of lighting up what's dark, yeah
so shine, shine, shine, for me baby
it only takes a spark
sweetness in starlight
sweetness 'til the day sighs
sweetness in starlight
sweetness 'til the sunrise, yeah...oh the day sighs
and there's nothin' under these bright stars
that could bring this night to ruin
so hold on tightly to me, baby
cuz tonight's gonna end too soon
and your touch is potent medicine, oh
knocks me out with just one shot, yeah
i've never seen such strong elixir, baby
it fixes all that i'm not
you fix all that im not, yeah
sweetness in starlight
sweetness 'til the day sighs
sweetness in starlight
sweetness 'til the sunrise
yeah, i'm holdin' on so tightly baby
i won't let you go
i won't let you go...
sweetness in starlight

Decided to go back just minute ago and listen to some stuff I hadn't listened to in a while. Matt Wertz was the artist of choice.

Man, i had forgotten how cool this song is! It should be the theme of every high school prom in the country or something!

Now comes another familiar tune and he is telling me everything's right... man, this guy is cool!

And He set me on fire, and I am burning alive.

November 03 2005


And He set me on fire, and I am burning alive. With His breath in my lungs I am coming undone. And I cannot hold it in and I cannot remain composed. Love’s taken over me and so I propose the letting myself go. I am letting myself go. You are my joy. You are my joy. You are my joy. You are my joy. I need to catch my breath, I need to. I need to catch my breath, give me a moment, now. I’m laughing so hard…



You are my joy
You are my joy
You are my joy
You are my JOY!


A prayer for the day…

The Barbarian Way

October 25 2005
Jesus the King came to fight for your heart! If He has won your heart, then to follow your heart will always lead you to follow the heart of God. - McManus

sigur ros

October 13 2005

Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorant words? Brace yourself, because I have some questions for you, and you must answer them!




photo from justincredible


(job 38:1-15)



Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth? Tell me, if you know so much. Do you know how its dimensions were determined and who did the surveying? What supports its foundations, and who laid its cornerstone as the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?





photo from justincredible




Who defined the boundaries of the sea as it burst from the womb, and as I clothed it with clouds and thick darkness? For I locked it behind barred gates, limiting its shores. I said, `Thus far and no farther will you come. Here your proud waves must stop!'



photo from justincredible


Have you ever commanded the morning to appear and caused the dawn to rise in the east? Have you ever told the daylight to spread to the ends of the earth, to bring an end to the night's wickedness? For the features of the earth take shape as the light approaches, and the dawn is robed in red. The light disturbs the haunts of the wicked, and it stops the arm that is raised in violence.




photo from justincredible


(31-37)



Can you hold back the movements of the stars? Are you able to restrain the Pleiades or Orion? Can you ensure the proper sequence of the seasons or guide the constellation of the Bear with her cubs across the heavens? Do you know the laws of the universe and how God rules the earth?



Can you shout to the clouds and make it rain? Can you make lightning appear and cause it to strike as you direct it? Who gives intuition and instinct? Who is wise enough to count all the clouds? Who can tilt the water jars of heaven?

A Moment

October 10 2005
As I sit in my office, Nichole Nordeman’s eloquent words quietly pace through my mind. “I am” she says. Each one seems to speak separately, as I take them in. This particular talent for writing would be considered anointed, I think.


I sit here and write. I sit here confused and wondering. This writing, an expression of what, I don’t know, and to whom, I’m not sure. Writing, it’s something I’ve grown up hating, but have grown to love. This information is beginning to become useful. What do I love? Not what other’s love, for my sake, but what do I love? I can name a few, but they seem to be independent, with little in common.


I’ve accepted the fact that I don’t need to know what will happen along the way, only what direction I am pointing. For I am sure of my destination, and I rest in that peace, but the planning, human side of me wants to talkback in question. He wants to ask for a plan, for answers, for just a little more light on the situation than I’ve been given at this moment.



So I sit here and wait. I wait on …


I bow my head, submit to who I know is truly in control, and make decisions only in the light He mercifully chooses to shed. I meander through desires, feelings, dreams, emotions, and personal plans with only one intent.





I fall. I rest, in the consuming fire. A beautiful surrender wraps me as He holds.
My heart fills with hope from time spent with Him.


This is what He was looking for.


A moment in the day, when I remember



Catalyst: Day 1

October 06 2005
He is holy, and the whole earth is full of His glory!

- Our goal then is not to steal his glory but to magnify it!

So I come to you tonight from a really comfortable bed, in georgia, after a really long day. Last night we left after AO and got into Atl. at around 4:15 here. Then we got up at 7 to head to the first session. It's been a long day, but very very eventful...

Events of the day:

- Singing praise with 9000 college leaders. it occurs to me at this point that this is a little like heaven. We just sit around and adore him all day long, but this should be our goal in day-to-day living. To adore Him by the way we live. Why does worship feal so natural... almost instinct? BECAUSE IT'S WHAT WE WERE CREATED TO DO!
- I'm NOW officially in the Guiness(sp?) book of world records!
- Louie G rocked my world.
- Donald Miller is absolutely amazing... he speaks just like he writes...
- Brought to tears when God answers a prayer and shows me just how needy i really am!
Oh Praise the One

Who paid my debt

And raised this life

Up from the dead


At one point in my life I had a crimson stain that covered my life becuase of my sin. Then Jesus, in His grace, washed it as white as snow!



- I was in the world debut of a 10 minute preview of footage of "Narnia". No one else in the world has ever seen the movie and they showed us an unfinished clip at the end tonight. It was awesome... yeah. The effects are amazing.
- I slept 2 hours in the last 40...
- We got drenched on the way in today, then froze through two sessions.
- Christian Stanfill lead worship... good stuff!
- The dude played the fiddle again... they did "Come Thou Fount"
- I lost my voice
- had a 3 hour debate on Arminanism vs. Calvanism

this is a little different than my usual blog, maybe b/c im dillerious at the moment, so im gonna end this here and probably delete it later...

Catalyst has been awesome so far.... tomorrow is Erwin McManus... lookin forward to that...

I'm lookin for direction on some things at the moment, so next time you have a conversation with our maker, if you wanna remember that, I'd appreciate it.

All In,
justin

Psalms

October 05 2005
You are Psalms






Yeah, so this nailed me. I'm thankful that when I do often struggle, He uses it to refine! We live by grace.
We... Live... By... GRACE...



Ephesians 2:4-6

4Instead, immense in mercy and with an incredible love, 5he embraced us.

He took our sin-dead lives and made us alive in Christ.

He did all this on his own, with no help from us!

6Then he picked us up and set us down in highest heaven in company with Jesus, our Messiah.



I was sitting in class this early today after a rough morning and this came to mind.

"A day that requires complete dependance on Him, is a good thing. "

When we are dependant on Him is when we are usable. I walked around for the rest of the day with this "free" feeling. Not dependant on myself for anything, and resting in the FACT that the whole world truly is in His hands. If he can personally name each star he can control my bad morning.

Learn to ask "How lord?" instead of "Why Lord?" If you woke up this morning and got out of bed, He is already at work in your life. That's not the question. When he allows something to come into your path you aren't comfortable with, start asking "How, Lord, do you want to be Glorified by allowing me to go through this?" instead of "Why, God, did you let this happen to me?"


Psalm 46



1 God is our refuge and strength,
       an ever-present help in trouble.

    2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
       and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea

Consuming fire,
Fan into flame
Give us a passion
For your name

She Should Be

September 30 2005
I’ll love everything about her! From the way her smile stretches across her face, to the way her shoulders curve. From the way she looks while she’s sleeping, to her grumpy mood when she wakes up. Every little thing that makes her who she is, that’s what I’ll fall for.

Lately, for some reason, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what “she should be”. What will my wife be like? Where this came from, I’m not really sure. Maybe it’s just where I am.

Sometimes when I stop, I think about her. This all never crossed my mind much until this summer. Some time ago I found myself in a place I really didn’t want to be. Heart-broken and scared of what I really needed to do, I knew it was time for some things to change. God was screaming to let him be number one, but at the time, someone else filled the spot. So I spent my time since then learning who God was, both in my life and in the lives of others. I knew him, but I had to fall in love with him. I had to get to know him on that personal level. So, needless to say, my focus was and is completely on him and not on dating or anything of the sort. Lately though, I started to wonder when that “focus” will include someone else.

I know before you can decide on what “she/he should be”, you have to fall in love with the one who sculpted them, the one who designed their every fingerprint, their every emotion, and every corner of their heart. To truly understand what human love can be you have to learn to truly love the one who designed them to fall in love with you.

I know she is there. Hopefully, she is praying for me, just as I pray for her. Maybe she even thinks about me when she stops to look at the stars too. In the mean time it’s my responsibility to act in a way that would make her proud and would show her I love her. After all, actions do speak louder than words. I don’t want to have to apologize for my past one day.

One day I’ll look at her and I’ll know. One day I’ll live at rest, at position number two, in someone else’s life. I’ll know that He sculpted her for me. Ill finally see that He designed her hand to perfectly fit in mine.

I look forward to building memories with her. I’ll look forward to the slow dances, weird inside jokes, and long conversations. I look forward to finally realizing that she’s the one I want in the rocking chair that’s right beside me on the front porch when we’re ninety. When we’ve lived life to the fullest and now all we have to do is sit there and reminisce, she’s the one I want to talk to.

I’m very content with Jesus though. He is truly, all I need. The point of life is to become someone, not to find someone. Who you become last through eternity, who you find does not. In the end, only one relationship matters.


body for sale!?!?

September 22 2005
i've been thinking a lot lately about finding a way to make money.... well go figure, right? not really a whole other job or anything, i dont have time for that... just something to do that i enjoy but would be some extra income...

now i know i could sell my body... haha, i would go broke... but something more than that, but less than starting a "mini-microsoft" or the like...

i'm just lookin for somethin to do... anybody got any ideas?

**edit**
Robert Lewis has just informed that i could sell Avon or MaryKay... what about this? hmm...

Photo From justincredible

September 21 2005


photo from justincredible

This is the most ridicilous thing I've seen in quite some time. I walked to the counter in the KUC, ordered a smoothie, and was chared $5.15...

"Now, thats a large sum of money for a smoothie" I thought... but instead of questioning the cashier i just handed her my piece of plastic and went on. Several minutes later she, with two hands, chucks this thing at me from across the counter. Why in the world would someone want this much smoothie? This is crazy!

That was a while ago and now I'm sitting in COBOL class still sipping away... maybe ill finish it at church tonight. . .


EDIT** i was a Dairy Queen last night and over heard a group of assumed h/s kids talking about this new things call "Phusebox" and how cool it was... just thought i'd throw that in there.

EDIT**2
Smoothie Purchased - 12:30
Smoothie finished - 3:45


Photo From justincredible

September 20 2005


photo from justincredible
there are a few pics up of coldplay i thought you all would enjoy... probably more to come...






photo from justincredible

coldplay

September 19 2005
i can't go on with out saying it, "geoge strait is the king of country music and Jesus Christ is the king of the world!", but other than that... something else that needs to be said isthat the coldplay concert was absolutely amazing...

it was more of an experience than a concert and it seemed that's what they were going for...

perfection...

favorite moment... when he said goodnight as he reached up and turned off the lantern (or the johnny cash tribute stuff) that was hanging from the rafters...

sorry if you missed it...

moblogging

September 14 2005
what is this moblogging thing? I dont see it, yet everyone is talking about it.... i hate the feeling of being in the dark on the latest cool new phusebox feature...

Gas... who needs it?

August 29 2005


photo from justincredible
Yeah, so my morning was a little rough. I left my house at 7:07 this morning. I arrived at school over 1 and 1/2 hours later.... You ask, "What happened to make my journey to school take an hour longer than it should have?

Well, it all started with leaving a friends house last night. I got in my truck, observed my gas tank level indicator was a tad below the 1/4 mark, and made the executive decision that I would wait until the morning to purchase my gasoline. Having made the trip too and fro Woodbury on less fuel than this before, I expected all would be fine. So, I make my right turn onto highway 96 (not highway 75) and point straight for the house. Now, if you've ever driven down highway 96 (not highway 75) you are aware that there is nothing, I repeat nothing, around once you leave the city. Somewhere around the 1/8 point of my trek home I take a second glance at my fuel level indicator and see that it has suspiciously dropped... to below the "E". So I put on my "well, I hope I make it" attitude and press on towards home not thinking much more about it. I arrived, enjoyed a nice nights sleep and all was well... until this morning.

Now, I'm on my way to school on highway 45 (not highway 75) otherwise known as "Auburntown Road", the most dangerous, windy, country road you've ever seen, and I start to sputter along. I'm thinking "Oh No..." So I turn off the air and push just prayin I make it to town. I did not. My truck just kinda says "Okay, that’s enough" and abruptly stops like a childish temper tantrum.
I yank it to the side of the road and make my next decision there. I usually don't have a cell phone signal here (yeah, its WAY out in the country), but somehow (praise God) I did this morning. So I phone my dad, he laughs, then proceeds to deliver my much needed fuel.

In the mean time while waiting patiently in my truck a lady I know stopped by. She used to be a substitute of mine in h/s. While exiting my truck I forget something important. I walk up to her car, chat for a few seconds, reasuring her all is well, she drives off. Then, upon my return, I grab the handle and immediately considered the pro's and cons of yelling obscenities at my truck. I had locked my keys inside. (It was quite a picture I’m sure with me on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere!)

I walk to the side of my truck, stare at the cloud-topped mountain that are accented by a beautiful overcast morning and ask a simple question... why? So then, once my normal self returns, I prayed, "God, just be glorified... I dunno how, just do it."

My dad rolls up, gets my gas, laughs at me, then goes to my house, retrieves my keys, delivers them to me, and 30 minutes later, I'm in business in the ocean of cars that is the MTSU parking lot.

Thank God, the day got much better from that point on. But now, as I sit here and reflect, I have a few thoughts on the day.

- It was much easier to say, "God, just be glorified" in my situation than it would have been for these people. (That’s the point of the picture up there) It could have been much worse.

I was reminded that I'm truly just floating along in this world; my hands aren't on the steering wheel. And that if God could carve out the mountains in front of my face He was taking care of me.

- My other thought comes down to battle. It's the battle that we face everyday, the battle between God's soldiers and the enemy. At a time when I need to be on my game with heading back to school and getting extremely busy, it seems like a lot has been going wrong and tempting me to worry. I’ve had to constantly remind myself that I’m only being “pushed around” in this world and I’m only here for one purpose, his glorification!


The enemy will not have my thoughts, my mindset, or my attitude! My focus will be clear and MY BANNER WILL BE HUGE….**JESUS CHRIST IS LORD!**

Maria, this is what my name means....

August 26 2005
JUSTIN: You are charming, talented and have a very positive attitude to life so it is hardly surprising that you attract success and recognition. Focussed and patient you understand that material rewards are a result of discipline. Being so creative and with a need for self-expression you may be drawn towards the arts, travel is also likely to be important. A loyal friend, you are a person who must be allowed freedom and independence.