i need help! =(
October 01 2006
i swear me and clayton may have broken up but i LOVE his mother. she is the sweetest thing ever to walk the face of this planet! i still talk to her all the time and like a week ago i broke down and thought i would do the nice thing and call and say hey so i did. pretty sure i talked to him for like 3 minutes and talked to his dad for about 10 then i talked to his mom for a good half hour. i don't know who was talking faster. lol. i'm starting to kinda have mixed feelings about this whole break up thing. i mean he did cheat on me. but atleast he didn't fuck her and he had the balls to tell me about it. i mean i love the guy to death i always have. we had so much fun and i'm thinkin it's better off this way. but i know since i'm still so close to his whole family it's gonna be pretty awkward. i mean we all grew up together! and mom is really wanting me to come see her (for the purpose of this post "mom" refers to clayton's mom) and dad (same with "dad") but i just know that i'm gonna go say hi to everyone and i'm gonna go to give him a hug and he's gonna kiss me or i'm gonnna kiss him or something and then the shit will REALLY hit the fan. i mean he told mom today that if she talked to me to tell me to come see him when i get a chance. how the fuck is he gonna go and do that when apparently he's dating the same skank that he cheated on me with?? and according to mom she's fucking hideous AND she's 33! everyone is raggin on me for talking to JJ and he's only 26. atleast he's not 30 something. i really don't know what is going on. it's like if JJ is around i'm going clayton who? but then when he's not here and i get to talkin to mom i start thinkin about all the stuff wee got into this summer. i mean, goin to panama together, going down to the bluff all the time, rididn around all of erin, going to paris for the fourth of july. i mean we had so much fun i'm smilin just thinkin about it! i really don't know what to do. i need boy help guys. what do u think...talk to clayton and see if he wants to give it another go? or stick around and see about this whole fling with JJ??