It's kind of funny how when you hear other people say some of the very things you've said yourself, you realize how silly it sounds, or at least you realize there's something wrong with the statement.

Over the weekend, I worked with 8th grade girls for One Weekend. And it really struck me Saturday night when they were talking about how they approach prayer, and what they talk to God about. And let me just preface my next sentence by saying that I am a terrible example of how a Christian's prayer life should be, but hearing what they said really hit me. While they were talking about what they talk to God about I asked them, "When y'all pray, do y'all do all the talking?"

"Well yeah," they replied, like what else was supposed to happen?

"Do y'all realize that prayer is a conversation with God, and you need to hear what He's saying?"

I could tell that resonated with the girls, and it resonated with me too, because I'm just the same as them. I rarely ever sit still long enough to listen to His voice. But it only makes sense that He would talk back to me, because a relationship does not fall on the shoulders of one individual.  

And you know, maybe if I took the time to actually carry a true conversation with God, I would realize some things so much sooner than I do. A perfect example would be the fact that I just had to back out of AO's Spring Break trip to New York, because I realized that I couldn't do that and so many other things I needed to plus maintain rest and communion with God. It was way too much and I've been wearing myself too thin as it is.

So I did as what Jerel calls, "laying the fleece out", and asked God that if I wasn't supposed to go, to please quickly find someone to take my place. So I told Hodge how I felt and boom - next day, I was replaced. Just like that. And while I paid like $200 and don't get to go, someone else gets to go for free, and to them, that may be a huge blessing. And just knowing that makes me feel better. If I had listened long ago, I wouldn't have been in this situation, but thank God I finally did listen, and thank God that someone else is being blessed. And it will be so nice to finally have a week to rest. 

Changing the subject, I've been to many Disciple Now events, whether it was Journey at my church in Houston or One Weekend at Belle Aire. I've gone to one every year since sixth grade, even during my college years since I've been a leader, totaling to ten of these things. The one that really truly sticks out in my mind more than any other is from my freshman year of high school.

That weekend we reflected on John 15, and how it is vital to abide in Christ. Our speaker for the weekend was Clayton King, and I remember him talking about how if we are to bear fruit for Christ, we have to be prunned (trimmed) and that can hurt! But it's so important. And I was able to mention that to my girls this weekend, and it was just neat to see what a resonating theme that is. As a Christian, we're going to go through fiery furnaces, and we may be rescued and we may not, but abiding is essential, and when we're focused on Christ and His purpose, then we are exactly where we need to be. It's easy to get comfortable where we are. But as I type, I can see out of the corner of my eye some pictures from M-Fuge this summer, and I remember that I'm not supposed to be comfortable in my set ways. I'm supposed to be glorifying Him. 

But you know what's really great about that? It doesn't mean I always have to go on mission trips, just as I'm learning this year. Sometimes it means resting in Him and hearing what He has to say. And I hope I don't miss that this next week.