Why Worry?

July 26 2005
So I'm sitting here with my hair piled on a sticky mound atop my head, coated in hydrogen peroxide, cetyl alcohol, a lovely little bugger called pyro-phosphate, and various other unpronouncable carcinogens. I'm emanating a distinct ammonia stench.

I think I may have inadvertantly gassed the frog whilst slathering this over my scalp. As soon as the "colour developer" was opened, he stopped moving. And hasn't started since. I'd feel mildly guilty if the dratted thing hadn't decided to infiltrate my room one night. YOU try waking up to an invisible speck jumping around the room, driving the cat into a frenzy.

I've been able to mold my hair into some pretty neat shapes, though. The faux-hawk, wilting spikes, and something resembling the turquoise lady-Jedi's twin head-growth's are the most notorious thus far.

I feel vaguely like the fantastic Ghost Busters. "Why worry? We just have unlicensed nuclear reactors strapped on our backs."

Why worry? I just have chemicals that if left in a closed container will cause it to explode saturating my hair [no joke -- it's a label warning].

T-minus 6 minutes to finding out whether I will indeed have neon orange hair or not.

::::LATER:::: Things are looking suspiciously crimson up there. I'll give it a few more minutes.... If I resemble Carrot Top in any way, I'm going to be both pissed and relieved. Pissed because my hair is orange. Relieved because it was 2-for-1, and I also bought dark brown dye. We shall see....

Discord! Chaos! Apocalypse! Disturbances in the Force!

July 26 2005
Not really, but I though I might reel in a few more unsuspecting readers with a title like that. *Grins*

I may be moving on to bigger and better things as far as employment is concerned. I may be working in a ......*dramatic pause*.........

LAW FIRM!!!!!

You may worship from afar.

I'm quite excited. John Green, a lawyer who attends St. Paul's Episcopal as well, called me today with a list of several Murfreesboro attorneys, and even offered to call ahead and warn them. I was planning to work for observation, but he tells me to sell myself [shut up] as a "runner" of sorts. This will no doubt entail doing as many menial tasks as can be squeezed into one day [I shall once and for all learn to use a coffee maker, for instance] but instead of getting to watch, I get to watch and hopefully get minimum wage, which is reams better than just watching.

But.... They'll have to take me, first.

Let's hope that happens. *Crosses fingers* *You should do the same [especially if you consider yourself anything remotely close to "Rad."]

On an even lighter note, I read the latest Harry Potter today, and am quite blank. I think this is a good thing. Not too certain yet.

And, rising to ever-higher levels of fluffy content, I'm dying my hair tonight. Wish me luck, and hope it doesn't turn orange or any other frightful neon hue. The last at-home dye job didn't take. Understandably miffed, I am only now making a second attempt.

*Vreeeeeeee* Ciao.

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday.

July 24 2005
I have emerged from the familial gathering unharmed, if not neccessarily unscathed.

Long story short: Within five minutes of arriving, one of the older attendees was asking me if I had mono. No. Then if I had a boyfriend. Again, no -- too busy. At which point I was informed that girls were never too busy for boyfriends. Ah, yes, this is where I excuse myself before I start touting feministic ideas.

*Blinks*

So today was all right. I might wind up being a gopher in a law firm in exchange for observation [and might even get some cash, but I neither set much stock by it nor care -- no, really]! Mum got a little bit psychotic, I guess you could say. The kind where nobody does anything correctly, even if they're not doing anything at all [which is the highest crime]. So I sought refuge at Leland's, where we watched Cellular. It was a pretty good film. A few instances were quite reminiscent of L.A. Confidential, particularly toward the end. This was followed by some of the more amusing snippets of The Patriot. "Here are your captive officers, sir." Haaaaa! Alas, right after that lovely line, it was time to leave, for my cousin turned 20 today, which is really surreal. I feel.... Old....-er. Go figure.

And Dad's switching off the light, which means I have to log off so that he can sleep.

Good night, all!

You Might Be a Redneck If.... Your Family Tree Does Not Branch.

July 23 2005
In ten minutes I leave for a "Sullivan family reunion."

What's sad is that they're virtually indistinguishable from the Phillips' side of the family.

Small wonder. One woman [who will remain anonymous due to the fact that I don't know her, nor wish to alleviate such a situation] was heard to utter, "Why, I'm related to her through both Momma and Daddy!"

I can't help but wonder how my father wound up normal.

Pray for me. I may wind up fielding questions about marriage.

Brother's Grimm Got Nothin'

July 21 2005
So I was reading someone's post about how they wanted a fairytale, and I just have to ask....

If you were to write your fairytale, what would it be?

Mine is fairly warped. It would involve a reluctant royal bound to a prearranged marriage contract. This sticky situation is made doubly difficult by the fact that she is developing extraordinary powers over which she has no control, leaving them apt to manifest at very inopportune moments. So like any dutiful daughter would, she leaves home and assumes a commoner identity. During her travels, which are rife with adventure as always, she winds up in a situation that involves her saving the life of a foreign-born travelling minstrel. The minstrel attaches himself to her, and try as she might, she just can't shake him off. This, just like in any other fairytale, means they eventually fall in love. They travel to his native country, where there's an excess of political unrest. They overthrow the corrupt nobility and just before everyone lives happily ever after....

She discovers he's the monarch she tried to escape a prearranged marriage contract with by running away.

Then everyone lives happily ever after.

So, what's yours?
Come oooon, tell!

Savin' Lives

July 20 2005
Yoinked from SingAHappySong/Amy Pow-ahhs



photo from SingAHappySong

Just another fulfilling work day.... ;)

Untitled

July 18 2005
Well, I'm home.

Virginia is quite possibly the most beautiful place I've ever had the pleasure of visiting.

It almost made up for the overwhelming desire to strangle 1/3 of the Jeskey bloodline. Seriously, I love my family, really. I do not love being in a car for ten hours with them.

Family togetherness is one of the overwhelming ills facing society today.

But.... Everything was worth it. Well, almost worth it. You know why? I bought a box filled with books, not a one of them printed before 1918. This includes three FRENCH BOOKS, an 1892 script for Shakespeare's The Merchant of Venice, Ivanhoe, The Last of the Mohicans, A Tale of Two Cities, Silas Marner.... Five dolla', foo'. For about seventeen aged books. With letters betwixt the pages. I found this box early on and stood beside it for literal hours, sutbly interrogating anyone who happened to peruse it. *Protective stance* "Do you like old books? Me too. Any particular interest in this lot? Oh, good."

Old books are love.
*HEART*

I'll not post the trials and tribulations, but to give you a general idea....
Within thirty minutes of driving on Saturday I almost had vehicular homicide burned into my record.
Because cyclists are convinced that twisty mountain paths are the ideal place to practise their art. Lurking around corners is their main source of entertainment, the better to catch innocent motorists unawares.

Fuuuuuuuun.

It's raining. I want to do something.

Aside from clean my room. But that seems to be unavoidable. Someone save me from it! *Falls into organisational quicksand* *Air bubbles cease* *Death is imminent*

Road Trip!!

July 14 2005
At this time tomorrow, I'll hopefully be nearing the Virginia state border.

For now, I'm sitting at my grandparents' watching Fox News beat the Natalie Halloway case into the ground as they interview random Aruban attorneys who are in no way related to the case aside from the instance of their nationality, and wondering when China will get around to nuking us.
Good times in America, foo'.

Some people.... *Exasperation*

My family desires me to work for that television network. They fail to realise that my political views would get me both sacked and maimed on the first day of job training.

The amount of makeup women wear on that show is astounding. They must use trowels.

Car commercials get weirder every day. Watch the latest Eclipse commercial and you'll see what I mean. [Tribal drumming is sooooo relevent.]

My frickin' god. I may be in all likelihood staying in-state for undergrad.
For a good reason. A very, very good reason.
I'm floored.

So yes, Virginia.... I get to test the acceleration of Granny's zippy new [red, might I add] Honda. Woohooooooo! *Grins*

Now my grandmother is discussing the properties of date-rape drugs sold in Aruba, and how they react with alcohol. And various methods of being safe at parties. Interesting. And analysing the handcuff patterns used on Joran Van Der Sloot [such a surname if ever I heard one; I know he's Dutch, but it's still just plain funny]. And on to sonar and cadaver dogs.... She's quite amusing -- I love her.

Thunderstorms are not one of God's greatest accomplishments, let's just clear that up right now.

You know you're best friends when you run a box down to their house, she's not there [because the lucky bitch is in the School of Visual Arts camp in Manhattan], but you stay for over an hour just talking with her mum and sister. :) Woot.

Quote of the Day
"I'm all for you moving out!" -- My beloved mother.
She didn't mean it that way. We were discussing my habitation should I attend MTSU. Because I really don't want to be the type of person who lives at home through college and then moves out when she gets married. Granted that works for some people [my cousin undoubtedly will be included in this], but trying to survive outside one's childhood home just seems to be an important developmental step.

You Missed One Helluva Bonfire!

July 12 2005
Someone pounded on the glass door leading to the patio. The girl nearest to it turned and drew aside the blinds. Standing there in the near-night was a pale, skinny boy in oversized black clothing. He looked nervous. She tilted her head, questioning him.
“The building’s on fire!” He shouted through the glass door. The girl blinked. It was as though she hadn’t even heard him, as though he had just moved his lips soundlessly.
“What?” she asked, her voice taking the tone of someone who had just tuned into the very wrong part of a conversation.
The building’s on fire. Get out. She blinked. They went back and forth like this twice more, the girl unsure yet all too aware of what she had heard, and the lad repeating the fact endlessly.
At last everyone rose. The “mother” of the group told everyone to grab their purses, wallets, or anything else they might need as thirteen people formed a line. The girl heard the glass door open behind her and the young man step into the apartment. She walked calmly to the front where her bag was. Nonetheless, her movements were erratic. She knelt to gather her purse and shoes, wondering why she couldn’t pick them up as easily, completely numb to the can of Dr. Pepper burdening one hand. She wished nimbleness in her fingers, the better to get out of the way in order to let everyone escape the apartment complex. . It was probably a small fire, she told herself. He didn’t sound that frenzied. She wondered where the blaze was.
They stepped outside, and a policeman quickly ushered them across the street. They looked up. The roof was crowned by whipping orange as black smoke charged upward in a sooty rush.
The young man who had warned them was standing a few cars down. The girl who had answered his knock wanted desperately to go to him, to thank him, but her eyes were hostage to the sight before them. The next time she looked back, he was gone.
A woman walked by, asking for wet towels for the firefighters. Everyone looked at her stupidly. The owner of the apartment pointed to his doorway and said, They’re in there. The woman turned to building, and moved on.
One girl dialled home. Mum, before I say anything else, I just want you to know that everyone and everything is all right.
What happened?
The building caught on fire.
Silence. Then, Are you okay?!
Yes, Mum. That’s why I prefaced the entire phone call with it.
Thirteen people sat on a hill across the street from the broiling apartment. Two of them made trips to the gas station, buying water for the fire fighters. The second time they harvested three more of their group. It was decided that if necessary, the girls would use their clothes to carry bottles. One of them wondered what possessed her to wear heels that night.
Flames scuttled across a new section of roof and down the interior walls, eating at tile rapaciously. The power in the apartment was still on – it was a miracle. Everyone latched onto this hopeful sign. The owner of the apartment rested his head in someone’s lap, but at that point smoke got the better of her, and she abandoned the group, trying to find a place to hang her head should her digestive system decide to reverse. The owner soon found her and they sat on the steps talking well into the night, watching the fire creep slowly to his porch roof and running down it like the water that extinguished it seconds later.
Is it just me, or is the chimney leaning to the right, he asked.
She tilted her head. Yeah, I think it’s leaning to the right.
Firemen concentrated their hoses on the chimney, which soon toppled to the ground like a beast felled.
I’m about to lose everything I own for the second time, he whispered.
They’ll stop the fire before then, she assured him. The power’s still on, see?
I see…


That's nonfiction, guys.
This is what happens when I return to civilisation [just in time for the Third Annual Angelina Jolie Sundance Film Festival -- of Hendersonville]. If you heard about an apartment burning down Saturday night, that was us. Can we party, or what?!

Virginia and Pope Marks

July 06 2005
AH-HAH!

VICTORY!!

Actually, more like an Act Of God.

The estate auction is NOT, as I had feared, THIS Saturday, but NEXT Saturday. I'm ecstatic.

But what else was I suppose to assume when the email reads, "You'd drive up there Friday, the auction starts at 8:30 on Saturday, then come back Sunday morning." ....That's what I thought. :]

I'm developing a bruise on my foot. What have I been doing with that foot to merit bruising???? Absolutely nothing. Gah. It at least could have been something cool, like I was scaling the Capitol building to save Pope Benedict Insert-Number-Here from certain death and when we were safely on the ground being applauded, he stepped on it. But he's the Pope, so since he's holy would he neccessarily cause bruises?
Ponder this while I go eat dinner and tango.

Argentine Tango, Virginia, Basements, and Other Escapades

July 05 2005
So.... I might not be coming home until freakin' Sunday.

Explanation:
My great-great-aunt or great-aunt or.... Okay, a relative on my grandfather's side of the family died several months back. Her estate auction is [I'm guessing] this weekend. My grandmother really wants to go. Grandfather not so much. Mum can't drive her because Caroline has a horse show in Lexington, Kentucky, that weekend as well [because things always work out that way]. She lived in northern Virginia. I have no problem doing this at all because exponentially-great-auntie was a packrat and has diaries, saddlebags, etc. from the Civil War. In fact, my great-grandfather watched as the Shenendoah Valley was torched at the age of three. But.... I don't know. I'm upset, but I'm not really sure why. I think it's because I'm going straight from BFE to a pilgrimage into Virginia [Oooooh, Brian will be so jealous, lol....] without a break to, I don't know, sleep in my own bed, do some laundry, experience traffic, visit home. We should be able to make the drive in one day. We will if I'm driving, at any rate. Just praying Granny doesn't watch the spedometre, as siblings are so fond of doing. ;)

It's an adventure.
I guess I'm doing laundry before leaving. I just want to know how/why we're going to hold all my dorm crap aside from luggage. These new Hondas are big, but honey, they're not THAT big.
This is confusing. I need details beyond the fact that the auction begins at 8:30 AM. That means nothing to me. It could be 8:30 AM next week for all I know.
That's it. Telephone call ensuing.

I've never driven farther from home than Hendersonville.
My grandmother is more directionally challenged than I am.
Maybe since I'm computer-literate her navigation system will take pity on us.

But if we don't get where we're supposed to be, we'll at least have another story in our pockets. :)
Now I'm excited. How much more schizophrenic can this post get?

Hot and sweaty from tangoing. Shut up. It takes a lot out of ya.
I'm going to wash my nasty self.
Ciao.

Revelation: Maybe if we're close enough to Washington, D.C. we could drive there and pass a day in the city!! And visit the National Gallery with the portrait of Ginevra di Benci!!!
*DROOOOOOOOOOOOOL*
I am geniusness.

Care to Dance the Assassin's Tango?

July 03 2005
I've been tango-ing for most of the day!

That makes me the hot-double-t-ness. You may worship from afar.

My right side is covered in bruises and scrapes. Curse you, dive-y roll, you! *Shakes fist in rage* Even sitting is an event. And let's not even get into lying down to sleep [when it happens]....

Running into a locked door slightly less than hot-double-t. But rather entertaining.

Next time we see a golf cart, we're hijacking it. But you don't know about that. *Shhh*

Mr. and Mrs. Smith is coming together. I'm excited. We might actually be able to pull this off by Thursday. But that implies we have any choice.

I'm off to do laundry shortly. Oh, the glories of throwing everything in cold water. ;)

Domestically challenged and proud. But I can tango.

Untitled

July 01 2005
Creepy-Side-Of-The-Monitor-Guy is back.

At a different table.
He's looking at Harleys.

I have The Evil Overlord Career Guide website up as a potential buffer.

Hah. Assume the cloak of impossible nerdiness and they will run in fear. At least, I certainly hope so.

Favourite Career Tip Ever:
56. My Legions Of Terror will be trained in basic marksmanship. Any who cannot learn to hit a man-sized target at 10 metres will be used for target practice.

He's gone. Safe! I am the only occupant of this room. I feel the power.
And this time there's no security camera reading over my shoulder to rain on any acts of potential diabolicalness!

Drama workshop in 32 minutes!!!!! I'm tres excited. :)

Untitled

June 30 2005
Someone IM'd me a few minutes ago.

I thought it was a pop-up.
So I killed it.

Was it you??

More interesting stuff in the previous post. There's a new monitor guy. O_O

Wahhhhhhhh

June 30 2005
Now there's a Creepy Redneck Side-Of-The-Monitor Guy. *Pause.* How did he know I was in philosophy 160???

And now he's trying to convince me to come to college here. Or LSU, where he is going to attend grad school.
I tell him I want to attend college in the urban north.
"Ah dunno eff I could do that, Ah've got me some promblums with thet pahrt." [I'll give you one guess as to why.]

He's concentrating in poli-sci. So I mention Mummy Dearest majored in that. And am now being grilled as to what she did with it.

It's all I can do not to laugh or cringe at this point.

I'm very tempted to bring up something about how my parents met at assasin's camp or something. Or that I'm going to double-minor in marksmanship and judo, and does LSU have those courses?

If we were in civilisation I wouldn't be so.... weirded out. But the man won't even travel north because of a war that was fought 150-odd years ago.

So much for writing that final piece of script.... I'm busy fielding questions from the natives.

Wah. *Seeks refuge in fine arts building*

Honey, Are You Still Alive?

June 25 2005
Leland, you'll appreciate this.

So Finis walks up to me on the way to geography yesterday and starts elaborating on how we crazy emcees are going to be doing a Mr. and Mrs. Smith theme for the talent show here, complete with fight scenes, and that we're going to be playing the title roles.

Fun, no?

There's going to be a mass meeting to write the script.

I'm excited.

So yesterday we boarded a bus at about noon in order to go traipse through the home of William Falkner. Four hours and three turnarounds later, we're convinced we're going to die in the wilderness.
The house was nice. The grounds were lovely. The four-foot long poisonous snake was less than attractive, even at a distance. At which point I decide the gardens aren't lovely enough to get bitten over. Down the nature trail it is, then, complete with scoffing at the "don't go past the first bridge" warning! [Come on, I grew up crawling through underbrush without benefit of a trail. What can happen?] Hmmmm.... What's that old guy doing walking around in the wild untamed portion of the forest [which is actually a vast majority of the woods]? He looks lost. Except for the fact that he's staring intently at something red hanging limply from a tree. I'll get closer and try to see what it is! *A few steps later* Then again, mayyyyybe I won't. People die that way.
Boy, I miss that poisonous snake about as long as I am tall.... Time to go back! *JauntJauntJaunt*

Memphis mall was the best and longest part of that trip, aside from the drive, which definitely wins out on endurance. Helmut [our geography professor] ate dinner with us. He is one incredibly cool old guy. He prices Indian artefacts on the side, kind of like Indiana Jones! Except he's old, and not wreaking havoc upon the Nazi party. I have a studded belt now. For one-fifth the price of those at Hot Topic. It makes me happy. :) I've now been to five Hot Topics within the state of Tennessee. And a bunch of us tried on corsets at Charlotte Russe [which are really just interestingly cut, heavily embroidered polyester shirts with a few cable ties set at flattering angles, but hey, they were still pretty]. There is photographic evidence. I wound up locked out of the changing room, though. That got interesting. Especially when trying to find an associate. Oh well. Makes for a story.

Anyway....

It's the weekend. Oh joy, oh rapture. Well, it would be joy and rapture if I didn't have to be memorising the location of about fifty European geographical sites.

Oh dear. Creepy Over-the-Monitor Guy is back. After staring in the door and deciding whether he wants to come in. *Waves uncertainly* His demise has not yet come about. As is, granted, evident from the fact that he's here, alive and well. I could plot it, form it, perfect it until victory is certain, and he's still be oblivious.

....I like doing this a little too much.

[Ciao.]

::EDIT:: Oh. My God. Over-the-Monitor guy has a friend. I believe they're speaking in French. O_O *Doink* ::END EDIT::

Boredus Maximus

June 23 2005
I feel like I should update, but I really have no idea what to type.

You know what I said about the last three weeks become "extremely, hm, interesting?" ......Scratch that. Stupid caterers. Stupid orcs. Still not king.

I think the coffee is wearing off from this morning, as I am in a very-close-to-black mood....

The creepy guy at the computer across the table from me keeps sitting up straight intermittently in order to see over the monitor. Damn him. I shall shatter his glasses with my heel and then strangle him with the mouse cord. Hahaaaa! And he shall never terrorise another computer lab again. What's great is that I can type an entire paragraph about his demise while he sits three feet away and smiles. And he'll be completely oblivious until I enact my "cunning plan." Which is quite literally and rather amusingly bringing an evil smirk to my face that he is misinterpreting as benevolence. My victim is unsuspecting, having been lulled into a false sense of security. I may strike at any time, and take this creature utterly by surprise.

......As I remember there's a security camera behind me reading every word.

CURSES.

We're going to Oxford, Mississippi, tomorrow in order to tour William Faulkner's home. Bonus: stopover in Memphis for dinner. Civilisation. There is a god!! Maybe we can go to Starbucks.... A town without Starbucks does not deserve to be on the map. Did you know there are nearly five times as many tanning salons as there are Starbucks in the nation?? [I guess they counted the ones that were attached to a deisel pump.] This is frightening.

Writing here about random pointless things has actually put me in a good mood. I'm not even sure why. But hey, who am I to question it??

Political Rants, Ravings, and Other Disgusted Musings

June 21 2005
All quotes taken from an MSNBC article written by Alex Johnson of Nashville, Tennessee.

"Reviving a major plank of his re-election campaign, President Bush called for a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage Tuesday."

Please. Does this really constitute an amendment to the mother-loving Constitution of the United States of America?! I was labouring under the delusion that this was a country founded upon the basis of freedom, which includes the freedom to marry whomever you damn well please.

Besides, it's not like HE'S ever going to have one, so why bother preventing other people from marrying people with similar sex chromosomes?? Doesn't really affect him, so why is HE getting all up in arms about it? Or anyone ELSE, for that matter?!

Some more of his latest acts of idiocy:
"In a nod to polling data that suggest Americans strongly support embryonic stem cell research, Bush sought to focus the debate on theoretical pitfalls should such science be perfected."

Mayyyybe it's just me, but the experiments have to have f-u-n-d-i-n-g in order to merely take place if they're ever gonna be perfected.

If you've got a problem with stem cell research, consider how you would feel if it might be the one treatment/practise/experiment that could save both your grandfather and his mind. Then watch your commander-in-chief shoot it down year after year. That's all I care to say on the matter. I'm not even going to employ science on this one.

"He thanked the 11,077 'messengers' who made the trek to Nashville this year for defending 'the values that carry a moral society....'"

Okay, this is relatively minor, I suppose, but if applied across the board could translate into a very frightening outcome. He's applying morals as defined by one religion's mythology. This just in: Not everybody practises said religion. Not everybody buys into the morals as set forth in his particular holy book. Not everybody agrees with practises espoused by holy book. Some think holy book is so diluted as to be practically worthless. To use one's religion to govern betrays all those with differing religious views and violates the whole separation of church and state, particularly if the church becomes the state. [Note: Not a stab at Christianity. This is very important for my continued survival.]

Even his own party members are challenging such acts in Congress. That's gotta say something.

I'm pissed off. I need chocolate. Flame me and prepare for a scathing return volley. You have been warned.

Leavin' on a jet plane -- er, car that is. In a car.

June 19 2005
Well, I'm leaving in anywhere from 2 seconds to 45 minutes from now.

See you sexy beasts in three weeks. Don't have too much fun without me. ;)

Holla!

Guess who's back -- back again!

June 17 2005
Oh dear.... The last three weeks of Governor's School will be interesting.... *Grins*

And I thought I'd never be grateful for Murfreesboro. Baby, go to Martin and you will realise what a cultural Mecca my hometown is. It [Martin] is smaller than Murfreesboro was when my mom moved here -- nineteen years ago.

And is it just me, or is our keyboard jacked up?? I think it's just me....

I have The Killers' CD. Mr. Brightside is stuck in my head. Mum promised to take me to Starbucks before leaving again. Going to see Mr. and Mrs. Smith with supercool people tomorrow. Life is good. :)

An Angsty Lapse

June 15 2005
Well, having finally viewed Brigit Jones: The Edge of Reason, I've come to this conclusion [it has to be read in a British accent, though]:

It's a really sucky state of events when you're missing someone you desperately care for, but have sincere doubts that they're missing or even thinking about you.

All right. Angsty moment over. Read about amusing boarding-schoolish escapades below. [They involve duct tape and curfews -- a good read, I promise, lol.]

*Less than five minutes later* All right, why the hell do I have a contemporary hymn stuck in my head?!! Although it feels odd asking "why the hell" about a hymn, but....

*And five seconds after that* So we had a "dessert pizza contest," and our group decided to create a rendition of dear Vincent's Starry Night [you know you're a humanities student WHEN....]. In the end we had to call it Starry Night On LSD. And find a creative, humanities-ish way to present it. We had a rap, a public service announcement, and a poem. I was in charge of the latter. I had ten minutes, a pen, and a pile of napkins, so apologies, it is rough. But it amuses me, so it gets posted here.

*Clears throat*

Vincent Van Gogh, with his brush,
Left his paints for stranger stuff
Swirl of chocolate, dab of cream,
He was on LSD, it seems.
This artefact, dug up in France,
Serves as proof of trippin' trance.
It may be tasty, it may be cool,
But our Impressionist, he was a fool,
And this shows why, instead of drugs,
You all instead should turn to hugs.


Buahahaha. We owned. And managed not to get whip-creamed by another group. Go us!

I will not break curfew tonight and get locked out. If you need an explanation, I trust the post below will suffice. :P

Hijinks Galore

June 15 2005
Shall soon be collaborating with 6'1" weight-lifting Jeff about what to do to our resident ingrate as mentioned in the previous post.

Professor Wenz is now threatening to "punch me to the moon." Oh well -- he's recovering from pneumonia, he can't do anything. *Grins*

That was horrible of me.

We'll ignore that.

Did you know that the dorms here LOCK at 10:00 [i.e. curfew]? To the point that your swipey card won't even open the door to the stairwell?? Let me explain....

So I'm sitting in the computer lab [yes, again -- lay off, it's my one link to society] and I see that well, goshdarnit, it's 9:59! Time to rush back to dear old [literally] Ellington Hall dormitories. On the way I meet up with Brent and Rachel, and we debate the best way inside the building without getting caught. Being much experienced in this venue by now, I immediately advise against going in the front door near the basement, as it was positively teeming with councillors and directors the LAST time we tried to sneak in past curfew. The general consensus became that if we could just get into the stairwell, we can say we've been there the entire time. Such a plan! While we're standing outside, revelling in our genius, the first floor door inside opens up, and out walks Craig [councillor who caught us tardy people the last time around]. Hide around the corner -- he'll never look there! Oh, if only.... Rachel and I get caught [Brent was off hiding in a bush, I think. Grr on him]. The door to the stairwell is shut, so I bust out my ID card to swipe it and grant us access to the hallowed halls of habitation. Or so I thought. *Swipe* Still locked. *Swipe* Hmmm. *Swipe*........ *Swipe*.... *Swipe* Try another card! *Swipeswipeswipe* *Rotate barcode* *Swipeswipeswipe* *Repeat* *Try Rachel's card* *And again* THEY LOCK THE DOORS AFTER 10:00?!?!! WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?!! Noooooo! Wait! Deliverance! There's a door in the BACK that leads to the basement [I, with my infinite foresight to rule-breaking, had taken care to notice it casually enough that afternoon] -- we'll go there, into the basement group room where our compatriots are probably sitting around watching Donnie Darko, and be safe! *Hums Mission:Impossible theme* Yes, everything was going our way. The door was unlocked, we wended our way until there was only one door between us and the basement-group-room. The one door down there that was locked. "It's probably like every other door in this building, and there's a lever on the other side that will unlock it. I can see Frank through the peephole. Let's pound on the door and get them to let us in." * Bangbangbangbangbang* Pretty sure we scared a few of them silly, which is always great fun. Well, if it had been our intent, anyway. We were a bit more determined to infiltrate unnoticed. Yes, it's probably like every other door in this dorm.... Which means, of course, that it definitely was NOT. Brent tries his key, which fits but does not turn. Curses. We'll have to use the conventional back door. Do the windows open? Yes, yes they do. From the INSIDE. And nobody inside is either willing or able to aid us. Sigh. So we sneak in through the conventional back door, into the basement door, and just when I round the corner and am almost safe beneath ground level, who do I see? Craig! "Hey Late Girl!" "Ahhhhh! *Runs*" Which is not suspicious at all, as you know.

But it was a hilarious adventure nonetheless, probably because it resembled movie incidences a bit too much.

So yes, do not try to get in at 10:02. This is impossible.

And whatever you do, do NOT start thinking about Eddie Izzard's "Babies on spikes! Taste of chicken! Rack of baby!" in your ethics class when Dr. Brown decides to use baby torture as an example. It is incredibly hard to keep a straight face, which is directly proportionate to how close to the front you are seated. Naturally, I'm front and centre. Most awkward. It does not hold well to burst into laughter in your ETHICS course of all places every time somebody says "baby torture." Thankfully, that was avoided, however narrowly.

And then we broke the in-the-room curfew by an hour duct-taping everything in sight. Well, almost everything. Taped Christina [our councillor] into her room a few times [ which resulted in us being chased down hallways and into rooms by handfuls of duct tape -- she was amused by the whole fiasco, though, which is always incredibly good fortune], taped off a hallway, returned a girl's book by taping it to the door, then knocking and running away, only to have her room mate come out, ask if we were bored, and tell us she wasn't there in the first place. And then going to get her. Triumph!! And the the piece de resistance -- a body outline!! Yesssss! I got to be the body. *Happy Dance* Arrows pointing to the crime scene were also emblazoned onto the floor. Unfortunately, the janitors removed our artwork this morning. Noooooo! Our masterpiece!! I feel kind of guilty they cleaned it up, though. We were so going to do it. Next time we're making signs for them. And bringing caution tape. And it's going to be awesome. There's much more, but it's not as interesting [which of course is assuming that ANY of this is] and would take too much space. Then this morning, as Christina kept foiling out attempts to effectively block her in, we left a welcome mat outside her door of duct tape -- sticky side up. *Sigh of Contented Bliss* It was havoc well-wrought. I'm going to like this whole dorm-life/college concept when it rolls around next fall. ;D

I wonder what could be accomplished between now and dinner.... Buahahaha.

Warning: Really Long Post, With Angry Teeth-Gnashing at the End.

June 14 2005
Name: Kelly Sullivan, Supreme Ruler of All She Surveys
Birthday: November 8 – 4 months, 24 days! I think. That involves numbers, though, so no promises.
Birthplace: Murfreesboro, a veritable metropolis.
Current Location: Fourth seat from the right, second table, computer lab, Andy Holt Humanities Building, Martin, Tennessee
Eye Color: Beautimous blue.
Hair Color: Brown. With relatively out-grown highlights. Bleach… *Twitch*
Height: 5’ 7” in the morning, when I stand up really-really straight! But I think I’m probably average around 5’ 6” during the day… Sigh…
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right.
Your Heritage: Geeze… Native American, Irish, Welsh, English [no Scottish, though!] German/Prussian, Czech, Polish. And we’re just going to assume that somewhere somehow down the line an ancestor was French. Whether that’s actually true or not is irrelevant. *Winks*
The Shoes You Wore Today: Old Navy flip-flops.
Your Weakness: Foreign accents and good hair. And insanity.
Your Fears: Spiders and thunderstorms. And death. Big fear of the death thing. Oh, and extremist takeover, whether that’s merely in our political system or another culture over-running us.
Your Perfect Pizza: Amy’s Vegan Pizza, available at Kroger.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Dual-enrollment. It’s on the rocks right now. Oh, and graduating would be nice.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: “Lol,” “lmao,” “heh,” “hehe” and other remarks
Thoughts First Waking Up: I really, REALLY don’t want to get out of bed… Did we finish the philosophy work??
Your Best Physical Feature: My feet in heels.
Your Bedtime: 12:00, give or take.
Your Most Missed Memory: When I was little, and nothing was impossible or complicated. And Dad seemed to be home more often.
Pepsi or Coke: Eh, neither.
MacDonald's or Burger King: Ahhhhh!
Single or Group Dates: Single.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Either.
Chocolate or Vanilla: CHOCOLATE! *Salivates*
Cappuccino or Coffee: Cappuccino.
Do you Smoke: Jamais [never].
Do you Swear: Fuck no.
Do you Sing: In the car, or in the shower if nobody else is in the house, lol.
Do you Shower Daily: Yes.
Have you Been in Love: Nope.
Do you want to go to College: If I don’t, my guidance councilor tells me I’ll die old, alone, and impoverished.
Do you want to get Married: It might be nice. But it’s not like I’d settle down with just anyone because it’s nice.
Do you believe in yourself: Sometimes.
Do you get Motion Sickness: Nope. I read, write, AND draw on cars and planes alike!
Are you a Health Freak: Mentally, yes. But it still doesn’t stop me from snarfing two slices of greasy pizza.
Do you get along with your Parents: Yes, actually. We hit a rough spot last year, but everything has smoothed out. Just don’t discuss politics or religion and you’re golden.
Do you like Thunderstorms: *Whimpers*
Do you play an Instrument: The flute.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Not in the past month, no.
In the past month have you Smoked: Never.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Does caffeine count??
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Nahh, not in the past... erm… 8 months, actually, lol!
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Nope.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Nope-nope.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Nope.
In the past month have you been on Stage: Yeppers!
In the past month have you been Dumped: Nope!
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Nope.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Nope.
Ever been Drunk: Nope.
Ever been called a Tease: Gr.
Ever been Beaten up: Nope.
Ever Shoplifted: Nope.
How do you want to Die: I’d really rather not. It goes back to that whole “fears” thing, you know? But if I absolutely had to, then in a blaze of heroic glory [so long as the maddeningly deadly heroic feat is pulled off, anyway. It would be so disappointing otherwise.]
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Millionaire, for obvious reasons. But I’ll settle for President/actress/usher at l’Opera Garnier.
What country would you most like to Visit: DUH. FRANCE.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Any.
Favourite Hair Color: Any.
Short or Long Hair: Longer than usual.
Height: Not picky.
Weight: Proportional.
Best Clothing Style: I’m just happy if they’re clothed.
Number of Drugs I have taken: Caffeine?
Number of CDs I own: God only knows…
Number of Piercings: Two – one per ear.
Number of Tattoos: None. Yet.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: I’m not really sure…

Oh wait. This one kid [in Governor's School for Agriculture -- go figure] was bragging about all these horrible things he did to a fellow boy scout on a camping trip when they learned he was gay. His ass is MINE. I can't believe people like that are actually stalking the earth! It's one thing to read about it in the news, but to encounter a creature like that in a program that is disgustingly selective... It makes you doubt your faith in humanity as a whole. Seriously, this kid better be holding on to his kneecaps, because seventy people are after them to hang over their respective mantlepieces. Not even Disney could soothe me [or taking shoes out of the closet in order to throw them back in], I was that pissed off. And I wasn't even there! I had to hear it from the people who were talking to this pathetic excuse of a life-form. He's getting called out. Hope he's at dinner tonight [more public] [agriculture kids and humanities kids are on a slightly different schedule, so you never can tell]. And he was BRAGGING about it, laughing, calm!! He's able to sleep at night after doing such a deed! He's not escaping on July 8 unscathed, I can tell you that now. Mum tried to council me not to do anything because there might be retaliation, but if nobody did anything out of fear of retaliation, where would we be? Huh?? Where would we be? It's not my fight, I realise this, but I really don't care. No one else seems to want to do it.

*Sharpens tongue in preparation for battle*

I'm so incredibly outraged it's nowhere near remotely funny.

....Just had to get that out of my system.

I am calm. I am peaceful. I am calm. I am peaceful. I am calm....

*Goes off to replay "March of the Toreadors"*

Monday, Monday....

June 13 2005
Elizabeth and I stayed up until 2:00 AM the night before our map test today (the cities of which ate my face) scarfing chocolate and discussing the evils of men. It was fantastic.

You should all try it sometime.

Is it neccessarily sad and pathetic that I've already come up with two-three character ideas for faire next year? And am sketching costumes in geography instead of taking notes on glacier movement?? I've decided I may want to portray a noblewoman next year -- Elizabeth Sydenham, second wife [or at least on her way to it] of Sir Frances Drake. I can lay more claim to it than anyone, because somehow we're distantly related. *Waves battle flag of blood relations* And then I get to play with pretty fabrics and shiny stuff, and swear my way through making a standing ruff. .... The other is Grace O'Malley, Irish pirate-ish-trader-like thing-extraordinaire, who is just badass in her own right. And a chimney sweep: Nicole Ashe. Just because I think going around all sooty and grimy with a blackened broom over one shoulder would be fun.

I got the Killers CD at Wal-Mart yesterday. We put "Mr. Brightside" on repeat while studying. It's an awesome disc. *Happy*

Tennessee weather is so schizo. Yesterday it was pouring buckets on us, and now the weather gods are all sunshiney and benign. *Shakes fist at the heavens* *Is promptly fried for such temerity* *Sigh* That never works....

Ooh! I might be returning to civilisation for a day or two! Depending on if I decide to enact the right of "midterm break" that half the dormitory world will be away on. Fun. I can do laundy, then. I think I have enough clothing to last me the week.... *Grins*

Nerdiness and Angst

June 09 2005
I GET TO COVER STAR WARS FOR THE PAPER HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Yes, I am a nerd. Thank you.

And I might work on a swing dance article.

Got edged out of Hamlet, but that's okay.

*Sings* I get to cover Star -- Wars! I get to cover Star -- Wars!

Quiz in philosophy. We actually covered territory in class today.

And we're studying population in geography. He threatened to beat us with his African stick if we fell asleep. The stick that signifies a man is wealthy enough to have four wives. Subsequent claims of having five or six were doubted by all. New catchphrase for his class is "Well hot damn!" Most amusing. He is referred to as Helmut outside of class. As in Lang. Maybe I'm the only one who gets that, though.

And someone looked at me as though I had said I killed kittens for fun when I told her I was writing something for fun (non-Star Wars). :\ Hrm. Oh well. She did ask, after all.

So what's new back in nice, civilised, Wal-Mart-Super-Centre Murfreesboro??

::::EDIT:::: I get the feeling I shouldn't get on this thing for a while.... Because I look at a picture.... And start to miss everyone. It's only the first week -- I'm cold, callous, prickly, and otherwise unpleasant -- this shouldn't neccessarily be happening, ya know? eBay will solve everything.... Maybe they're selling a soul I can buy. Oh who am I kidding? I'm looking at cheap/knock-off designers like the label whore I am. :-P Lol. Talk to you guys (much) later. ::::END EDIT::::