The good, the bad, the ugly, the weird, the exciting, the hopeful, the depressing, the boring, the same old same old stuff...

Sigh.





"So excuse me forgetting but these things I do --
you see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue.
Anyway the thing is what I really mean --
yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen."

The retreat was awesome. Much was learned, much was planned, much was discussed. The food was excellent. I got to spend time with some wonderful people.

Quotes of the weekend:

"I wanna see the blue boats!!"

"Sometimes I cry...but the coffee's worth it."







You just have to take a risk sometimes, you know?? I wish I could read people's minds. Really, really bad.

The Youth Leadership Retreat begins today. I'm not sure what to expect, but I think it will be an excellent two days.

However, I've yet to do any of my mountainous pile of homework, except a little etymology, so I'm going to be extremely stressed Sunday. Nothing I can't handle, though.



Trust. I need to trust. Of all virtues, this I lack. Trusting in God about my future, which always seems hazy and threatens disappointment. I wish I knew what was coming...or no, not what's coming, per se, but I wish I knew for a fact that whatever's coming is good. Trust. I must trust that there is a plan there.


Well I'm out.
Christina

I got a 56 on my Economics credit-by-exam test.
I will not be getting credit,
needless to say.

Babies, babies everywhere
and not a drop to drink.
Who drinks babies? I ask you.

This quote is several days old...but I likes it -

Lindsay: "I'm afraid of getting jumped in the Siegel parking lot..."
Me: "Carrington could take them, she's like a blackbelt."
Stephanie: "I could take them...I'm a ballerina!"



So how about that.
Christina

Days are long.
But short at the same time.
I guess I should say, classes are long.
But the day goes by quickly.

I’m so tired.
That’s what I get.
For waking up at four thirty.

Church is tonight.
I’m on a mission.
Of the journalistic variety.
A hunt.

Now I must go.
It’s been nice.

Christina

photo from Raisin

I

Oh what can ail thee, knight-at-arms,
Alone and palely loitering?
The sedge has withered from the lake,
And no birds sing.

II

Oh what can ail thee, knight-at-arms,
So haggard and so woe-begone?
The squirrel's granary is full,
And the harvest's done.

III

I see a lily on thy brow,
With anguish moist and fever-dew,
And on thy cheeks a fading rose
Fast withereth too.

IV

I met a lady in the meads,
Full beautiful - a faery's child,
Her hair was long, her foot was light,
And her eyes were wild.

V

I made a garland for her head,
And bracelets too, and fragrant zone;
She looked at me as she did love,
And made sweet moan.

VI

I set her on my pacing steed,
And nothing else saw all day long,
For sidelong would she bend, and sing
A faery's song.

VII
She found me roots of relish sweet,
And honey wild, and manna-dew,
And sure in language strange she said -
'I love thee true'.

VIII

She took me to her elfin grot,
And there she wept and sighed full sore,
And there I shut her wild wild eyes
With kisses four.

IX

And there she lulled me asleep
And there I dreamed - Ah! woe betide! -
The latest dream I ever dreamt
On the cold hill side.

X

I saw pale kings and princes too,
Pale warriors, death-pale were they all;
They cried - 'La Belle Dame sans Merci
Hath thee in thrall!'

XI

I saw their starved lips in the gloam,
With horrid warning gaped wide,
And I awoke and found me here,
On the cold hill's side.

XII

And this is why I sojourn here
Alone and palely loitering,
Though the sedge is withered from the lake,
And no birds sing.

Game tonight!!

We're gonna whip Riverdale.

Uh huh.

You heard me.



o_O



In other news, some people are crazy. But I love it. I'm a little weird too. So what if I like rainbows, and know Barney's rainbow song. And I cry at night for hours when mother tells me to load the dishes. Plus swiss cheese is really good on chicken sandwiches. So leave me alone, psssshyeah. I have my people.


Christina

Hoooooooooly freaking cow, am I having fun doing disco in choir!! Wow. It's amazing.

Would it be just disgusting and wrong if I said I said I think a freshman guy is really cute?? He's like 14 but he's just amazing. I want to hug him. And marry him. But that would be history repeating itself (my mom's two years older than my dad.) And I swore I wouldn't follow in her steps.



Anyway this year just keeps getting better! And the day doesn't seem so long now, like it did Monday and Tuesday, when I almost froze and starved and passed out from exaustion and bain stress in every class. Things are settling down a bit.

Kisses.

Chri etc.

The first full day of school. I think we'll do nothing in my early day and 6th period, serving as bookends to an otherwise insane schedule. And yes, I have Latin homework tonight. There is simply no justice. But Ms. Tinsley claims that homo doctus in se semper divitas habet. So what can you say?

I want some ice cream, please. Ben & Jerry's Half Baked with Chocolate Tornado.

Yessssss......I have Mr. York again for Etymology!! "I'll take up your homework whenever I feel like taking it up...and we'll be eating in here about once a week."




Oh, oh, oh, oh, staying alive, staying alive...

I find it kind of funny that when you take on a massive cleaning project, you usually end up with a bigger mess than you began with. Mon plancher pauvre!

I think a prayer and struggle I've had for a long time is finally being answered and helped. I've really come to possess a much higher level of self-control. I find it much easier to resist temptation. Not just the temptation to sin - though that's a large part of it - but also such temptations as eating poorly and being lazy. This is most welcome, God, thank You.



I have a very weird mind. I'd say I'm half poet, half intellectual, and those two halves don't get along very well. Some days the world is a metaphor and the sky is beautiful and I'm interospective and pensive, and then the next day I'm a cynic trying to understand the complexities of life and being oh so logical and analytical. And I argue with myself and contradict myself and I've still yet to decide which half of me will win.

La vie est belle?

La vie est tragique?

Ou tous les deux?





I think after using all this French I may have to actually learn the language. That or Italian. I'll keep you posted.

Christina

Everything seems sort of weird at school. Oh, I'm excited about finally getting to see my friends, no doubt of it. But everything's different...new freshmen, new classes, new people in journalism and choir. Last year was so good, I don't know how this year can compare. But I'm hopeful and resolute in my determination to make the best of my junior year, whatever happens. I mean, this is my second to last year of free public education, ever. It's all surreal. We're all growing up. We can drive and have independence and increased responsibilities and privledges...we're practically adults. How bizarre.

Anyway, yes. I'm still excited about what this year might bring. If nothing else I'm thankful that my schedule worked out and I didn't have to drop anything I really wanted to take. I get to see a few people I didn't think I would have any classes with, like Lauren Woodward. And choir's going to be amazing - we're going to see two musicals in NYC and maybe sing in St. Patrick's Cathedral - squeeeeee!



How was your first day of school?

Ah, so, yesterday was Operation: Closet Overhaul for Christina. She worked from 2 - 7 completely emptying and rearranging and cleaning out her closet and dresser. It was quite tiring, and it left a great deal of debris scattered about her room - but her closet is immaculate. And today she and the mum and sister did a bit of back to school shopping, and at 2:30 she has yet another dentist appointmet (one of four this month).

School is just around the riverbend....Christina is quite excited. She has yet to finish Their Eyes Were Watching God, but she'll get to it eventually.

You know, Christina just now realized she is writing in third person. Ah, well. These things do happen.

Farewell.

Christina

Well I'm in Missouri right now at ole' Grandma's house. It has been an intereting week - I saw West Side Story, got my first ride in a police car ("Grandma, put on your seatbelt!!), went to Six Flags, and slept in a recliner. Meanwhile scheduling is going on, and mum has been calling me to help figure out the conflicts because no classes I want are being offered sixth. In the end I had to drop down from Pre Calc to advanced algebra/trig. I'm shedding no tears over that one, let me tell you. So here's my schedule:

Early - Etymology - York
1st - AH Latin III - Tinsley
2nd - AP English III - Marlatt
3rd - AP US History - Bowman
4th - Journalism - Juergens
5th - Chamber Choir - Gregory
6th - AH Algebra/Trig - Manu- however you spell it -zewsky



Bada Bing. Could be a lot worse, eh?

“Poetry is sane because it floats easily in an infinite sea; reason seeks to cross the infinite sea, and so make it finite...The poet only asks to get his head into the heavens. It is the logician who seeks to get the heavens into his head. And it is his head that splits.” - G. K. Chesterton

Did you know we have a family farm in Colordao? One which I could someday inherit? I don't know....could you see me as a farmer??

I'm also related to about literally half of the people in CO. My great-grandparents from my dad's parents all had about 12 siblings each, and they all had at least half a dozen children too, and they had a lot of kids, and now those kids are having kids.....it's pretty insane.

And to top it off I will inhereit a portion of the mineral rights for an entire valley in CO. Meaning if they ever strike oil, I will get $$$. They probably never will, but it's still kind of neat.

Murfreesboro seems very humid now...

Christina

Important Bulliten: I'm leaving tomorrow and not getting back until late Sunday. I'll be chilling with my grandparents in Keenesburg, Colorado, population 500. Howwwwdy.


Take the last two digits of the year you were born and write that many things about yourself.

Ok, I was born in 1989...so here goes:

1.First and foremost, sour cream angel food cake is the greatest food ever. Period.
2.I am a morning person.
3.I can’t stand AIM. I have it, but I don’t use it.
4.I have only 2 cousins.
5.I rarely use my cell phone.
6.When I was six I ate hair dye and was rushed to the hospital. But I lived.
7.I feel naked without a watch on.
8.I lived in Vegas for 4 years and sometimes I still miss it.
9.I played soccer for 8 years, and I was actually good.
10.I played piano for 5 years, but I was actually not good.
11.My “thinking spot” is in the swing in my back yard, in the morning, with coffee.
12.I was obsessed with pokemon in 4th and 5th grade, and could name them in order.
13.Flip-flops and heels are basically all I wear on my feet.
14.I’m the only one in my family who has perfect vision.
15.I am painfully shy.
16.I think redheads are hotttt.
17.I contradict myself constantly.
18.My last “boyfriend” was in 6th grade, and he was 4 inches shorter than me.
19.The hottest thing a guy can wear is a tuxedo or a suit.
20.I sleep perfectly still, except when I travel.
21.I constantly have a strong urge to have BABIES.
22.I’ve never danced in the rain, it seems a little cliché.
23.I listen to classical and choral music a lot.
24.I love drawing eyes. I’ll sit for hours and draw nothing but eyes.
25.I try to always – always – have a positive attitude, if only to annoy people.
26.I’m on xanga/phusebox way too much. I check them probably 20 times a day.
27.My dad was friends with Brad Pitt in high school.
28.When I was eight I came very close to drowning, but my aunt saved me.
29.I have never listened to most of the popular or cool bands like Death Cab.
30.I have never so much as held hands with a boy.
31.I used to be really, really chubby in 4th and 5th grade.
32.I think women should almost always stick to their natural hair color.
33.I will honeymoon in Venice.
34.I love to write stories but I’m terrible at coming up with plots.
35.Guys who are sweet and gentlemanly are 378 times hotter than macho guys.
36.I cry every time I watch Peter Pan.
37.I wear tons and tons of brown. I think it’s the best color on me.
38.My kitty’s full name is Snickerdoodle Mittens Witt.
39.I have very little self-confidence, but I’m pathetically vain.
40.Usually on Friday nights I sit at home and surf the net feeling mildly depressed.
41.I really like learning languages, and they come naturally to me.
42.I buy my underwear at Wal-Mart.
43.I really would like to marry young and not work past 30.
44.I’m a nerd for Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Harry Potter, AND Star Trek.
45.Me and my younger brother are actually very close.
46.I fear and loathe worms of any shape, form, or kind.
47.People think I’m filthy rich cause my dad is a doctor, but I’m NOT.
48.I constantly dream about the future and often forget the present.
49.I’m not that great a singer, but luckily Mrs. Gregory likes me.
50.I am very, very curious. I admit I can be nosy.
51.I find big social events tiring and stressful and I always go home early.
52.I don’t like french fries.
53.I’m not a democrat or a republican, but a little of both.
54.I drink more Diet Pepsi than is strictly safe.
55.I am extremely sensitive and easily hurt, emotionally.
56.I have very few guy friends, but I wish I had more.
57.I like learning new words and expanding my vocabulary.
58.I love feeling like I’ve gotten something accomplished, and hate feeling bored.
59.Once my brother got lost on a mountain and Search and Rescue had to find him.
60.I want to die while I’m still right in the head. Alzheimer’s scares me.
61.My greatest, deepest fear is conflict.
62.Talent is very hot in guys – whether musical, artistic, or something else.
63.My obsession is earrings. I can’t get enough of them.
64.I think there’s something seriously spiritual about a hot cup of coffee.
65.The one thing that always makes me sick is cleaning up cat vomit.
66.I have no idea where I stand on many theological and political issues.
67.I am analytical to a fault.
68.Before I die I want to be Eponine in a performance of Les Miserables.
69.People sometimes think I’m snobby just cause I’m reserved.
70.I would absolutely hate to be famous. But I wouldn’t mind being rich.
71.I think dark chocolate is about 4793 times better than milk chocolate.
72.I love my friends probably more than they’ll ever realize.
73.I really want a pet mouse. Or a lizard.
74.I had 2 teeth knocked out in a soccer game, which is why I quit playing.
75.I like pretty, sparkly dresses and wish I had more opportunities to wear them.
76.Italian guys are also hot hot hot.
77.I was told the truth about Santa when I was 4. FOUR!!
78.I often get waaaay obsessed with things. And occasionally people.
79.I wet my pants in 2nd grade because I was scared to ask to go to the bathroom.
80.I never, ever get mad at my friends. Seriously. It’s true.
81.I worry about everything.
82.I wish I had pretty handwriting.
83.I’m extremely jealous.
84.I listen to Rich Mullins all the time.
85.I don’t cuss, even when I’m alone or very angry. It just feels wrong to me.
86.I kind of like being vague and enigmatic.
87.On my mom’s side I’m Polish and I’m very proud of being a Pollack.
88.I hate exercising. I hate it passionately.
89.The keys to my heart are godliness, compassion, maturity, humility, strength, and tenderness.


Now I want all of you people to do this too. It’s really kind of fun trying to come up with random facts about yourself...

For the last couple of days I've been an unwed teenage mother.

...ish.

And I ate a whole roll of cookie dough today. Yikes.

But seriously. There's a grasshopper on the ceiling.

And aside from that, I'm doing much better.

A shower is now in order. No, not a baby shower. A water shower. So I can smell like sunshine and daisies for church tomorrow.

And with that I am gone.

whooooooosh.......

Did You ever know lonliness? Did You ever know need?
Do You remember just how long a night can get?
When You are barely holding on, and Your friends fall asleep,
and don't see the blood that's running in Your sweat?

I can't see how You're leading me,
unless You've led me here,
to where I'm lost enough to let myself be led...

I have absolutely no idea what’s in store for me.

I could be married or single,

rich or poor,

long-lived or die young.

In fact, there is absolutely nothing God guarantees us about life. The only sure thing is that we’ll die. Everything else is kind of iffy. I think we as humans go out of our way to avoid thinking about death, but there’s something really refreshing about living in the realization that we’ll someday die.

For one thing, it makes everything that’s hard about life easier to bear cause we know it’ll pass. It teaches us to live with detachment – not the sort of detachment where we don’t allow things to move us, but the sort where we let ourselves be moved easily and passionately, but don’t try to claim or possess the things that move us.

Once you come to realize how unbelievably brief life is, then you understand that greatness is absolutely not the goal of life. Living with what time we have to the glory of God is.

It doesn’t matter if I’m not really great.

And if I don’t have to be great, that means I can fail.

And if I can fail, that means I can try.

And if I can try, that means I'm going to have a good time trying.


I love you guys.

Christina

I got utterly, completely soaked head to toe walking halfway around Siegel to my car in a torrential downpour just so all YOU people can have your yearbook by September. Grumble, grumble...

Plus Ms. Millsaps (who idolizes my father but can never remember me) yelled at me for 'being out of class' when I never had a class to be in to begin with. I didn't correct her, though. She's not one to argue with.

But now I get to eat pancakes so that makes me happy.

What makes you happy?