Let me go....... Promo?

December 22, 2006you can hold her hand
and show her how you cry
explain to her your weakness
so she understands
and then roll over and die

you can brave decisions
before you crumble up inside
spend your time asking everyone else's permission
then run away and hide

or you can sit on chimneys
put some fire up your ass
no need to know what you're doing or waiting for
but if anyone should ask
tell them i've been licking coconut skins
and we've been hanging out
tell them god just dropped by to forgive our sins
and relieve us our doubt

Big smiles and high pitched squeals

December 15, 2006Darlin Christmas is coming
salvation army bells are ringing
Darlin Chrismas is coming
do you believe in angels singing
darlin snow is falling
falling like forgiveness

Went and saw OVEr the Rhine last night with Beks, Holly, hannah, Kristen, and david last night... Absolutely amazing. Enthralling. We splurged on the christmas CD.
They sung a whole bunch of new songs... So good. cant wait for them to come out on CD. :) :P).

Then off to the big Cafe Coco for about forever. Did some skipping, wrestling and ballroom dancing. got home around late and were asleep at about 3:30-4:00 after a lovely bottle of Muscato. MMM.
Despite any examinations the following morning. They're a joke anyways.

I am a happy camper.

happy happy happy.

Learning

November 30, 2006Life has thrown me many curve balls these past 6 months.
and i thought i would share a lesson that i have learned.

Taking something for what it is, doesn't neccessarily make you a better person. You want more, and you know it, but you settle. Oh this one is ok... not as nice as the one i really want , but hey its much less expensive. Or it involves less risk. Well it isn't worth it. I've learned that i will never settle for anything ever again. I've never been able to lie to myself. But i am fully capable of lieing to another person, with absolutely close to zero remorse at all. I took life as it was. Took it with a "what the hell... what could i possibley lose from this?".. Well i lost a lot. I lost 6 whole months of my young life. Nothing too catastrophic i must admit, but still time is of the essence.
I dont regret it. I just know that if the situation was to arise again, i would not grab for it.

over time, i realized what i was missing. But the truth is that familiarity is comfortable and safe, and its a hard thing to abandon. However there comes a timme when reality wakes you up to the dull thud of what could be more. See if i sat in this steady flow of life i would never learn anything. I would never grow emotionally or intellectually. Familiarity is a curse and i damn it to hell.. It takes the best of who we are and pushes it back into a daily routine and life outlook. The adventure is out there but it will ppass us by if we are not ready in stance looking for it. It may take years to recognize. but it is there and i will find it.

I beg you all. Live for yourselves. because in the end that is all you will have left. There may come a time when everything else falls away, but you will still be there. You are alive and because you are you must honor that. Be selfish. be horribley selfish. So what if you hurt some one else's feelings. Their feelings are not worth sacrifices to your Self. of course i dont want you to purposely hurt some one else. But when it comes down to you or them you sure as hell better choose yourself.

I'd never die for anyone but me.
The last frontier is only
the stranger in the mirror that i see.

THe end

November 26, 2006The end to 6 months...


I'm 'round the corner from anything that's real
I'm across the road from hope
I'm under a bridge in a rip tide
That's taken everything I call my own

I'm on an island at a busy intersection
I can't go forward, I can't turn back
Can't see the future
It's getting away from me
I just watch the tail lights glowing

One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
One step closer to knowing
Knowing, knowing

I'm hanging out to dry
With my old clothes
Finger still red with the prick of an old rose
Well the heart that hurts
Is a heart that beats
Can you hear the drummer slowing?

One step closer to knowing

G-BABY

November 18, 2006

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! GG!!!!!!!